


10 Dollar

by BlazingStarInInkyBlackness



Series: Money and Love [1]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Bullying, Child Abuse, Dehumanization, Eating Disorders, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Force-Feeding, Forced Prostitution, No Smut, Past Child Abuse, Porn Video, Rape Recovery, Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt, Teen Pregnancy, Terminal Illnesses, Underage Prostitution, Underage Rape/Non-con, of a secondary and almost oc character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-07
Updated: 2018-07-11
Packaged: 2019-03-15 01:09:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 48
Words: 97,390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13602402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlazingStarInInkyBlackness/pseuds/BlazingStarInInkyBlackness
Summary: Alexander was used to his step father hitting him. It had happened for long enough, after all. What he wasn't used to was this new frontier of attack the man used. It quickly destroys him, turns him into a shell of what he used to be and the people around him have to help patch him back together.He just has to prove that he's more than a ten dollar whore.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've given up on apologising for this shit. Read the tags, if you're still worried then message me, it's not a happy story but I know some people like reading these stories and I know I love writing them. The underage is mostly non-consensual (apart from bits later on which are two underage characters together with consent.)  
> Also, I have not written enough fics with Burr as a main character despite me adoring the character. I hope this fic begins to set that straight and show him in the light I see him in

The first time it happened, it barely registered in Alexander’s mind. One moment he was just in his room, lying on his bed half asleep. Then the door had cracked open. Alexander had looked up in confusion only to have his mouth covered.

Then-

Alexander retched into the toilet as what had just happened hit him full blast. There was a knock on the door and he whimpered. Then he wiped his mouth and flushed the toilet. He looked a wreck in the mirror but he couldn’t care about that, not yet.

He just had to get to a phone, get to a phone and call the police. Or Hercules. He was big and strong enough to make sure nothing would go wrong. Or maybe Aaron. He was quieter but Alexander was terrified of the anger he’d seen in the man.

Alexander opened the door to leave but he was immediately pushed back. He struggled for a moment but then he heard the door click behind him and his back hit the wall. He stared up to see his step father towering above him. Alexander couldn’t help it as his breathing picked up in sheer terror.

“You don’t say a fucking word.” The man slurred out, obviously drunk. Alexander closed his eyes in anticipation of the hit that always came. “Listen to me, you bastard!”

“I- I am!”

A slap rang out in the confined space and Alexander whimpered.

“Sir. You fucking call me sir!”

“Yes, sir.” Alexander mumbled, trying to blink back tears. The man stared down at him for a moment before he scoffed.

“You tell anyone and I’ll kill your mother. Got it?”

“I won’t! I- I swear! Please don’t hurt her!”

“Then you keep your fucking mouth shut.” The man released Alexander, causing the teenager to stumble slightly before he righted himself. The man glared down at him in disgust and Alexander felt the same disgust welling up inside him. He was disgusting.

“I will. I promise.”

“I own you. Remember? I own you!” The man stepped forwards again, alcohol ridden breath too close.

“I know.” Alexander whispered, the tears finally falling. The man seemed satisfied with that as he turned on his heel and stormed out. Alexander felt his legs give out underneath him and he sank to the dirty floor. He felt his hands shaking and he brought them close to his body.

After a time that he couldn’t bring himself to count, Alexander rose on unsteady feet and hurried into a different room. His mother was lying on the bed, surrounded by drips and a heart monitor. He sank down onto the bed next to her and took her hand, carefully avoiding the IV.

“Hey mama.” Alexander whispered. He brushed away a tear as there was no response. There never was. She spent so little time awake and even the time she was awake, she wasn’t really there. He knew deep down that she was barely clinging to life but he couldn’t bring himself to accept that. He had to believe she would be okay. “We’re gonna get through this. I swear. I- I got a job so Adams’ll have to get off my back. And- and then I can support you. I can get you into a proper hospital. You’ll get better and we- we’ll be happy again!” Alexander wiped a tear away at that. “I promise and I- I don’t break those. Remember?”

There was no response from the woman and Alexander whimpered. He needed comfort or he was about to break down completely.

“Please, mama. Please just show me that you’re still there. Anything.”

“She won’t answer you.”

Alexander jumped and whirled around to see Adams stood in the doorway. His breathing picked up again as Adams came to tower over him.

“She’ll wake up. I know she will.”

“She’s costing us too much money.”

“No.”

“What did you just say to me?” Adams asked, voice low and dangerous. Alexander whirled around and stood.

“I- I’m sorry, sir. I didn’t mean- I- I mean-”

“She’s wasting energy.”

“Please, sir. Don’t-”

“You said you have a job?”

“Yes, sir. In the school library.”

“How much does it pay?”

“Minimum wage.”

“That won’t be enough.”

“I-I’ll get more. I swear I will!”

“From where? You’re worthless. Your own father didn’t want you.”

“I’ll do something!”

“Don’t raise your voice to me.”

“I-” Alexander nodded and ducked his head. “I’m sorry.”

“You have two weeks. Two weeks to raise one thousand dollars.”

“Sir-”

“If you love her then you’ll do it.”

“I will. I- I will.” Alexander gently squeezed his mother’s hand before he turned and ran back to his room. Before he could, his step father grabbed his arm. Alexander could almost swear his heart stopped.

“You know the consequences, bastard.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Fail me and you fail her. You kill your own mother.”

Alexander turned and ran the moment his arm was released.

 

The next day at school, Alexander was distracted. John was the first to notice it as he sat next to the shorter teen in most of their classes. By lunch, John was officially worried. Alexander hadn’t brought a lunch, again, and was instead just doing his homework for the next period.

“Alexander?”

“What?” Alexander muttered, focused on the work in front of him.

“Is something wrong?”

Alexander paused for a moment before he looked at John. All he could see looking back was friendship, forgiveness, acceptance.

“No.”

“Is it your mom?”

“I said nothing’s wrong.”

“Then why are you doing your homework now?”

“I didn’t have time last night.”

“You’re normally a week ahead.”

“I’ve been busy.”

“Doing what?”

“It’s none of your business!” Alexander finally snapped. John pulled back but the other three members of the table turned to stare.

“Alexander?” Lafayette asked softly. “Is something-”

“Nothing’s fucking wrong, okay?” Alexander half shouted, standing. “Apart from the fact that my friends apparently can’t take no for an answer! Fuck off and leave me alone!” Alexander shoved the rest of his work into his bag and then turned on his heel to storm off.

Unfortunately, in his direct path was another student. Alexander didn’t see until the other student’s lunch tray was colliding with his chest and flying out of his hands. The cafeteria quietened for a moment as Alexander stared down at the food on the floor. He then looked up into the eyes of James Madison.

“I- I’m sorry. I didn’t-”

“What the fuck did you do this time, Hamilton?” Thomas asked, sauntering up behind James. Alexander shot him a look and tightened his grip on his backpack.

“James, I didn’t-”

“It’s fine.” James offered a small smile. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. Fine.”

“Hey. Don’t be a jackass.” Thomas snarled. He stepped forwards and grabbed Alexander’s arm. Alexander wasn’t quite sure what happened next. All he knew was that in the next moment, Thomas was on the floor and arms were wrapped around Alexander.

“Calm down.” Hercules whispered in his ear.

“Get off me. Get off me!” Alexander half shouted as he fought out of the grip. Hercules let go but kept a loose grip on Alexander’s shoulder.

“Alexander, just-”

Alexander could feel himself shaking. Thomas slowly stood and glared at Alexander.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“I-” Alexander opened his mouth but he didn’t have anything to say. Thomas’ expression darkened and he took a step forwards as his hand curled into a fist. The first blow took Alexander to the floor but the next was blocked by Lafayette.

“Thomas, just-”

“He just decked me for no fucking reason, Gil!” Thomas half shouted. “You want me to just walk away and-”

“Jefferson! Hamilton!”

Alexander winced as he heard Washington’s voice call out across the hall. Burr knelt down next to Alexander and frowned.

“What?”

“You have a black eye.” Aaron whispered. Alexander put his hand to the bruise he’d spent half an hour covering that morning.

“I-”

“Later. Okay?” Aaron kept his voice down as he offered his hand for Alexander to stand. Alexander nodded and offered him a weak smile. “Good luck.”

“Hamilton, Jefferson, my office. Now.” Washington was fuming and Alexander nodded. Thomas shot him a glare.

“If this goes on my permanent record then I swear to God-”

“Whatever.” Alexander muttered. He walked forwards and ignored Thomas.

The cafeteria tracked their movements as they left the room and entered Washington’s office. Washington stared down at the two of them for several long moments before he let out a long sigh.

“What was it this time?”

“Hamilton went ballistic!” Thomas shouted. “I touched him and then he decked me for no reason! I didn’t hurt him or anything and he just decided to punch me like the freak that-”

“Thomas, that’s enough.” Washington warned. “Alexander?” Thomas glanced down at Alexander in confusion as the teenager had still not spoken. “Do you have anything to say for yourself?”

“No, sir.” Alexander muttered, voice thick with emotion. Thomas blinked in confusion. Was Alexander about to cry?

“Can you tell me why you hit Thomas?”

“No, sir.”

Washington frowned at how depressed the teenager in front of him looked. Normally Alexander was quick to come to his own defence. This time he seemed to have nothing.

“Then I have to suspend you for the next two days.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Thomas, you retaliated. A week’s afterschool detention.”

“Sir-”

“It will not go on your permanent record.”

“Okay.” Thomas glanced at Alexander again who didn’t even seem to have acknowledged that he was being punished. “Can I leave now, sir?”

“Yes. Go to the nurses’ office and then join the rest of your lessons.”

Thomas nodded and stood. He glanced at Alexander once more and winced at the growing bruise on the teen’s cheek. Alexander didn’t even seem to have noticed it.

When Thomas was gone, Washington sank into his seat and looked across to Alexander. Alexander met his gaze for a second before he looked away.

“Is something going on, Alexander?”

“No, sir.”

“How’s your mother?”

Alexander shrugged at that and Washington frowned. It was perhaps the worst kept secret in the school that Alexander was a primary carer, that he spent almost every second of his free time at his mother’s side. He knew her condition inside out, in the ways that a child should never know about a parent’s terminal illness.

“And your step father?”

“It’s okay.”

“Why did you hit Thomas? Really?”

“I don’t know.”

“Why didn’t you try to defend yourself?”

“I don’t know.”

“What’s that bruise on your face from?”

Alexander raised a hand to his face but aborted the action halfway through and let it drop.

“I don’t remember.”

“Alexander, if you’re being hurt then I can help. But you have to tell me.”

“I’m fine.”

“Alexander-”

“Can I go home now?”

“No. I have to call your step- father.”

Real fear flashed in Alexander’s eyes for a moment as he looked up.

“W-why?”

“Because he is your legal guardian.”

“Only by marriage! Anyway, he’ll be working. He’ll be busy and I- I don’t want to distract him or anything. It’ll just be better if-”

“Alexander, the only way I am going to not call your step father is if you tell me why you’re so scared of that thought.”

“I’m not.”

“Alexander-”

“Call him then.” Alexander hid his shaking hands in his pockets as Washington sighed and reached for the phone.

 

Aaron stared after Alexander for several long moments before he sank back down into the seat. John, Hercules and Lafayette did the same.

“What was that?” Hercules muttered. John shrugged.

“I’ve never seen him like that. Jefferson normally has to actually do something before he gets hit.”

“Do you reckon it’s his mother?” Hercules asked, still staring after Alexander.

“He’d tell us.” John stated. “Right?”

“I do not know. Petit lion is having difficulties he does not wish to share.”

“It can’t be easy.” Hercules added. “Seeing your mom die like that and not being able to do anything.”

“He does everything!”

“I mean-” Hercules sighed. “You know what I mean, John.”

“Yeah but-”

“It’s not his mother.” Aaron muttered. All three turned to him.

“Pardon?”

“It’s someone bigger than him. Someone a lot stronger as well.”

“How’d you figure that?”

“Someone hit him. If it’s bad enough to set off that kind of response then I think it’s been going on for a while.”

 

Alexander whined as his back was slammed against the wall. He nearly bent over as a fist was driven into his stomach. If he had eaten anything that day he would probably have thrown up.

“You bastard.” Adams growled. “You couldn’t even fucking pretend for one day, could you? Couldn’t do anything!” The next hit was to Alexander’s face and he had to bite down on his cheek to not shout out. He couldn’t afford to wake his mother, didn’t want her to see him like this, this pathetic.

“I’m sorry, sir.”

“What did you tell them? What did you tell them!”

“Nothing! I swear! They- they think it’s stress!”

“They’d fucking better.” Adams released his grip and Alexander slumped backwards. He was exhausted and all he wanted to do was sleep. “You know the stakes.”

“Course I do.”

Alexander barely had time to finish his sentence before he felt a fist collide with his stomach again. The sudden force dropped him to his knees and he retched for a moment. Luckily, nothing came up.

“Don’t speak to me like that.”

“I’m sorry, sir.” Alexander whispered. Adams stared down at him and scoffed.

“The deadline’s still on. You get me that money or there’ll be a sudden equipment failure.”

“Yes, sir.” Alexander whimpered. He heard Adams stalk off and he pulled himself into a ball. He wanted to throw up but there was nothing to throw up. He felt sick to his empty stomach.

All he wanted was to disappear. He didn’t know why that wasn’t happening.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second chapter in one day shh  
> it's short, okay? And I need validation in everything I do (also the word document just hit 30k so buckle in kiddos this gets so much fucking worse)

**From: John**

**Alexander, are you okay?**

**From: Laffy**

**We’re worried about you, petit lion**

**From: Herc**

**Is someone hurting you?**

**From: Aaron**

**Meet before school. 8:30 at library. I’ll bring food.**

 

Alexander stared down at the four texts. He couldn’t summon the energy to respond to John or Lafayette. Hercules’ text just made his breathing speed up. On the other hand, Aaron’s spoke of something very different.

It had been three days since… that night. Two days wasted. Twelve days left to get the money he needed and no way of doing it. His job wouldn’t get him that money. If he worked flat out, then maybe but the job was only a few hours each night and he couldn’t afford to get a full time job alongside the caring of his mother and school.

He had no idea what to do and it hurt.

His phone buzzed once more and Alexander looked down.

**From: Aaron**

**If you don’t turn up I’ll tell Washington about the black eye**

**To: Aaron**

**You can’t!**

**From: Aaron**

**Then hurry up**

Alexander glanced around his room and located his school uniform after a moment. It took a moment longer to throw it on, trying to avoid the bruised skin that seemed to be most of his body. He paused as he saw the sick looking green hand prints at the sides of his hips.

He felt bile rise in his but he didn’t (couldn’t) pause. He pulled his jumper down over them as if that could erase what they meant.

 

Aaron was sat on the floor when Alexander approached. He dusted himself off quickly and looked at Alexander critically. Alexander shifted nervously as Aaron gently touched the bruise prominent on his face.

“What happened?” Aaron’s voice was so soft that Alexander felt a second away from breaking down.

“Jefferson.”

“Thomas hit your other side.”

“N-no. He just- I mean it was the floor. When I fell over.”

“Please don’t lie to me.”

“I’m sorry.” Alexander’s voice broke and Aaron sighed. He gently pulled Alexander into a hug.

“It’s okay.”

“No it’s not! But I- I can’t-” Alexander sobbed and Aaron shushed him gently.

“Is it your step dad again?”

Alexander jerked back and shook his head.

“N-no.”

“Alexander-”

“You can’t! I- I can’t tell anyone! Please!”

“You helped me. Remember?”

“That was different.”

“How?”

“It was your uncle. Not-”

“He was still hitting me. You still got me out. You helped me, Alexander. Let me do the same.”

“No. I- I can’t.”

“Okay.” Aaron shook his head. “I don’t like this. But here.” Aaron pushed a lunchbox into Alexander’s hands.

“Thank you.”

“Whoever’s hurting you, don’t let them see that.”

“Of course.”

“And the moment it gets too much, tell me. Please.”

“Okay.”

Aaron pulled Alexander in for another brief hug.

“Thank you.”

“Of course, anything for you.”

Alexander wiped at his eyes and smiled weakly up at Aaron.

 

By lunchtime most people had stopped staring at Alexander. Most people, that is not including Thomas. Thomas hadn’t stopped and it was beginning to get on Alexander’s nerves.

He was sat at the table with his friends, digging into the lunch Aaron had brought for him, when Lafayette brought it up.

“Thomas does not mean to be cruel.”

“What?”

“He does not mean to stare.”

“Well he is.” Alexander glanced at Thomas before sighing. “Do you think he’s gonna want a rematch?”

“Look, you punched him. He punched you. You’re even. Anyway, he didn’t even end up with a bruise.” Hercules shook his head. “You don’t owe him anything.”

“Yeah.” Alexander put his food aside and pulled his homework out of his bag instead.

“Do you not wish to eat more, petit lion?”

“Uh, no. Not hungry.”

Aaron narrowed his eyes at that but Alexander avoided his gaze. He was telling the truth, he wasn’t hungry. He had barely eaten in so long so he couldn’t imagine eating more than a few mouthfuls.

“You are very thin.”

“Yeah. I guess.” Alexander hovered his pen over one of the questions.

“Worryingly so.”

“So?”

“Alexander-”

“Look, maybe- maybe I forgot a few meals. Looking after mama is just- it’s a lot, okay?” Alexander felt a lump in his stomach as he used his mother as an excuse, how dare he?

“We’re here for you.” John said quietly. “Remember that.”

“Yeah. Thanks.” Alexander turned back to his work and tried to ignore how Aaron’s eyes didn’t move off him. Aaron knew too much. Far too much.

 

When Alexander finally arrived home he was exhausted. The work in the library had been tiring and the day had been long. His first stop was to his mother’s room. He paused as he saw that the sheets had been changed.

He stepped further into the room and saw that someone had cleaned her, moved her and changed her clothes. He furrowed his brow before he turned around. He carefully made his way into his step-father’s room.

The man was on his laptop and Alexander froze as he heard a moan of pleasure down the speakers. Fear filled him and he stumbled backwards. Adams heard the noise and whirled around. His face contorted in anger and he strode forwards and pinned Alexander against the wall.

“Where the fuck have you been?” He growled. Alexander wrinkled his nose at the stench of alcohol.

“Sch-school!”

Alexander’s head snapped to the side as he was slapped.

“Don’t fucking lie to me. School finished four hours ago!”

“I- I had to work!”

“Then give me the money!”

“Wh-”

“Give me the fucking money!” Adams screamed, slamming Alexander into the wall behind him. Alexander whimpered before he dove for his bag. He pulled out his wallet and brought out the money. Adams stared down at it before he scoffed.

“Sir, I know it’s not much but-”

“Not much? You have eleven more days and this is all you’ve got?”

“Please, sir. I-” Alexander broke of as he was hit again. Tears sprang to his eyes and he whimpered.

“Don’t fucking talk.” Adams growled. Alexander nodded. Adams paused for a moment and looked up and down Alexander. Alexander suddenly realised that Adams was half naked and far, far too close. “You want a way to make that money?”

“S-sir, I-”

“Do you or not?”

Alexander thought back to the image of his mother in his head, the kind woman who protected him no matter what. He remembered the lullabies she sang to him when he was sick and the way she held him when he just needed to cry. When he got overwhelmed she knew exactly how to calm him down.

“Yes.”

“Then get in there.” Adams jerked his thumb to the bedroom. Alexander felt his lower lip begin to shake.

He stood slowly and walked into the room.

 

Alexander lay on the bed, feeling sick. Adams rolled off him and stretched, as if nothing had happened. Alexander sat up weakly and grabbed for his underwear. He saw how much his hands were shaking but he couldn’t feel it, couldn’t connect what had just happened to his body to him.

“You know, you’re a natural.”

Alexander stared at the bedsheets numbly. He watched the bloodstains that had appeared.

“I’m talking to you, bastard.”

“Yes, sir.” Alexander whispered.

“So how many people have you fucked before?”

“No-one, sir.”

“Don’t lie to me.”

“I’m not.” Alexander looked up to face Adams. “I’m not l-lying.” His voice broke slightly and he bit down hard on his lip. Adams smirked.

“No-one would know. You’re a regular whore.” Adams turned to leave but Alexander forced himself to his feet, ignoring the pain.

“You- you said there would be- there would be money.” Alexander’s voice shook. Adams slowly turned.

“You really are a whore.” Adams grinned as Alexander felt tears gather in his eyes. Adams rifled through his wallet and took out a ten dollar note. He threw it down on the duvet. Alexander stared at it, still disconnected from the world.

“I don’t- I don’t understand.” Alexander whispered.

“What bit don’t you understand?”

“That’s not enough.”

“Excuse me?”

“I- I need to make an average of- of seventy dollars a day. And- and I can get nearly twenty from the library and then if I can do this once a day then- then that’s- that’s thirty but-” Alexander knew he was rambling but he didn’t care. All he could think was that it wasn’t enough.

Adams grinned.

“There are always ways of making money if you’re desperate enough. Especially for someone like you.”

Alexander sat down on the bed and clenched his shaking hands between his legs. Nothing felt real but he knew it was. He knew that he had to get more money, he had to be prepared to allow his step father to do that to him if he wanted even a faint chance of getting anywhere. He had to- he had to do something.

He just didn’t know what.

Alexander stood and went to leave the room. Before he did, he caught sight of the laptop screen. The video was obviously porn and to the side of the video was an advertisement, five hundred dollars for a video.

Alexander shuffled forwards and stared at the URL. He then looked at the video, the thought of doing that himself, of showing the world, of showing everyone just what kind of worthless whore he was-

Alexander wasn’t sure how he got to the bathroom. All he knew was that he was throwing up and yet nothing was shifting the revulsion lying heavy in his stomach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully this chap should explain the title and the weird tag of 'porn video' with no smut


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is brought to you by the amazing comment defendedbymypen left

**To: Aaron**

**Aaron, I’m scared**

**From: Aaron**

**Talk**

**To: Aaron**

**You can’t tell anyone. If he finds out I told anyone he’ll hurt me worse than ever**

**From: Aaron**

**I can get you somewhere safe**

**To: Aaron**

**You can’t. Not this time. Trust me**

**From: Aaron**

**If you want me to trust you then you have to give me something**

**To: Aaron**

**He’s threatening my mama**

**From: Aaron**

**And there’s no way to get her out of the house?**

**To: Aaron**

**Not without an ambulance**

**From: Aaron**

**I could tell Washington?**

**To: Aaron**

**No. You can’t. Please**

**From: Aaron**

**Okay**

**To: Aaron**

**Really?**

**From: Aaron**

**I hate this. I hate all of this but I know you won’t budge**

**To: Aaron**

**Thank you**

**From: Aaron**

**I’m making your food for tomorrow. What do you want?**

**To: Aaron**

**I’m not really hungry**

**From: Aaron**

**Tough. What do you want?**

**To: Aaron**

**I really don’t mind**

**From: Aaron**

**You’re having a chicken sandwich**

**To: Aaron**

**Okay?**

**From: Aaron**

**Get over yourself, Alexander, if your family isn’t feeding you then I will**

**To: Aaron**

**Thank you, Aaron**

**From: Aaron**

**No problem**

 

Thomas stared across the classroom at Alexander. Alexander was staring down at his notebook. He hadn’t looked up in the last half hour, despite the teacher talking throughout that time. It was as if he wasn’t even listening.

Thomas could see Alexander’s own friends nudging each other and pointing to him as well. Thomas frowned at that. They were usually a bit more subtle than that.

The bell rang and Alexander jumped violently. He looked around and seemed astonished to find he was in class. He shoved the notebook into his bag and stood on shaky legs. John immediately rushed over to him and started to talk in a quiet but hurried mutter.

Alexander shook his head at something but John seemed to press it.

“Stop it!” Alexander hissed out, loud enough for the whole room to hear it. Thomas felt people around him turn to stare as Alexander glanced around. “Gotta go.” He muttered before rushing out of the classroom.

John sighed and glanced back to his other friends. Hercules shrugged his shoulders and Lafayette just looked lost. That was what spurred Thomas into action.

“Wait here.” He muttered to James.

“What?”

Thomas hurried out of the classroom and saw the tail end of Alexander entering the bathroom down the hall. He took in a deep breath before he set his shoulders and pushed the door open. The room was empty and all the stalls were open apart from one at the very end. Thomas could just about hear the sound of Alexander vomiting.

He couldn’t let that sympathy win him over though. He walked over to the last stall and banged on it. There was a whimper from inside.

“Open up, Hamilton!”

“Jefferson, can we-”

“Open up!”

There was a pause as the toilet flushed and then Alexander was stood in front of Thomas. Thomas tried to not let the shock show on his face. Alexander looked wrecked.

There were deep bags under his eyes and his eyes were bloodshot. He was leaning partially on the stall as if he couldn’t even support his weight. Thomas knew by how skinny the boy was, the weight had to virtually nothing anyway.

“What do you want?” Alexander asked, voice soft. Thomas felt a twinge of guilt for what he was about to do.

Thomas advanced and Alexander scrambled backwards. Thomas shoved him backwards and Alexander hit the stall and cowered back.

“Please, Thomas-” Alexander whispered. There were tears in his eyes and Thomas paused for a moment.

“You hit me, remember? This is just payment.” With that, Thomas pulled his arm back. Alexander flinched and his knees suddenly collapsed. Thomas stared down as Alexander’s breath sped up. He crouched down and Alexander cowered back even further.

“Please.” Alexander whimpered. “Not again. Not now.”

Thomas felt his gut wrench at the pathetic sight in front of him. He sighed.

“I’m sorry.” Thomas grabbed Alexander’s bag and rifled through it until he found the notebook. He shoved it into his bag before he walked off.

As soon as he was out of the bathroom he grabbed his phone.

**To: Gilbert**

**Alexander’s having a panic attack in the toilets. Didn’t want me near him**

**From: Gilbert**

**Thank you**

**To: Gilbert**

**Make sure he’s okay, please. He looks terrible**

**From: Gilbert**

**I will**

 

Thomas pulled the notebook out of his bag and flipped through it. He reached a page he recognised from class. He frowned as he looked over it.

It was full of numbers, multiplication of ten, a random number that Thomas didn’t recognise, and then at the very bottom five hundred. It looked like Alexander had been trying to work out some kind of maths problem again and again, approaching it from a hundred different ways.

The only ones that had a shaky underline beneath it was the ones with the five hundred in it.

Thomas pulled his phone out and took a picture of the page. He didn’t understand it yet but he would.

“Thomas?” James said softly. “Is everything okay?”

“I don’t know.” Thomas muttered. “I don’t know.”

 

Lunch was a silent affair. Alexander stared down at his sandwich but didn’t make a move to eat it. His friends kept on shooting nervous glances over his head and it was beginning to get on his nerves. So sure, he’d had a full on breakdown in the toilets and then started hyperventilating when someone had suggested calling his step-father. He had managed to make a half decent excuse.

Not that he was stupid enough to think that any of his friends believed him.

“You have to eat something.” John said softly. Alexander shook his head.

“Not hungry.”

“Alexander-”

“I said I’m not hungry.” Alexander snapped. He put the sandwich back in the box Aaron had given him.

“When was the last time your step father fed you?” Aaron asked quietly. Alexander looked away. “Alexander?”

“Last night. We sat down like a normal fucking family, got my mama out of her coma and had a nice meal. Is that enough for you?”

“Alexander-”

“Just drop it, will you?” Alexander stood and walked off. Lafayette rose and followed. Aaron sighed as Alexander left. After just a few moments, Alexander’s seat was filled. Aaron looked up and frowned as he saw Thomas.

“Thomas?”

“Aaron, Herc, John.”

“Laf just went and-”

“I’m not here for Gil.” Thomas shifted nervously before he pulled the notebook from his bag. All four stared down at it.

“What’s that?” John asked.

“Alexander’s notebook.” Hercules muttered. “How did you-”

“That doesn’t matter.” Thomas opened the book to the page he had been looking at earlier. “This was what Alexander was so focused on earlier in class. Do any of you know what it means?”

Aaron stared at the notebook and frowned.

“Well that’s minimum wage.”

“Alexander has a job.” John added. “Afterschool. Maybe he’s trying to save up to something?”

“Where would he be getting five hundred dollars from?” Thomas asked, pointing to that figure. “In one go? That doesn’t sound legal.”

“Alexander wouldn’t do anything to risk his future.” Hercules said softly. “He wants to be president one day.”

“Can he even-” Thomas shook his head. “Not important. Look, I know everyone thinks I hate Hamilton but I- I can’t stand seeing anyone like that. Not even him. So if you need help, James and I will be here to help.”

“For now,” Aaron said softly. “Don’t tell anyone.”

“You don’t think we should do something now?”

“No. I think we need to know all the facts before we do anything.”

“If he’s being hurt-”

“As someone who’s been in his situation.” Aaron’s voice took on a cold tone and all three turned to look at him. “You do not let the abuser know. Alexander is a victim who cannot leave the house without his mother being put in danger. We have to wait.”

 

Alexander could feel his hands trembling and he forced himself forwards. A week had passed since the first event and he felt sick at every moment. He had been eating less and less and could feel the weight leaving his already thin body.

He slowly knocked on the door and took in a deep breath. The door swung open to reveal Adams. He frowned down at the teenager.

“What do you want, bastard?”

“I- I know how to- t-to get more- more money.”

“Talk.”

Alexander slowly pulled the folded up advertisement out of his pocket. Adams grabbed it and scanned it for a moment. His eyes widened in surprise and a smile slipped across his face.

“What’s this for?”

“I- I need someone- someone else.” Alexander said weakly. “And-”

“And?”

“And I d-don’t have anyone else.” Alexander whispered.

“If I do this then I get half the profits.”

“Yes, sir.”

“How many times would you need to do this?”

“Twice, sir. T-to reach the goal.”

“Then you’d better get ready.” Adams pushed the door open and Alexander stared at the bed in front of him. “Is there a problem?”

“I- I was ex-expecting- I bought-” Alexander put his schoolbag down and pulled out two masks. Adams picked one up and pressed it against his face.

“Worried about your privacy?”

“Yes.” Alexander stared up at Adams who grinned. He pressed the other mask into Alexander’s hands.

“Get onto the bed.”

Alexander pulled off his school jumper and climbed onto the bed, hands trembling. Adams went over to his cupboard and pulled out a camera and tripod. Alexander stared into its unseeing eye and felt like he was about to vomit.

The red light flickered on and Alexander glanced up at Adams as he approached. Alexander wanted to run but he forced himself to stay still.

When Adams wrapped thick ropes around Alexander’s wrist he found it a lot easier all of a sudden.

 

The red light flickered off and Adams stood. He stared down at Alexander in disgust. Once more, he pulled the ten dollars out of his wallet and threw it onto the bed. He then turned to leave.

“Wait!” Alexander called out. Adams turned back slowly.

“What?”

“I- I can’t get free.”

“And?”

“I- I need to! I have h-homework and- I- please don’t just leave me tied up!”

“You have homework?” Adams scoffed and stepped forwards. “What’s the point? It’s not like anyone wants anything from you. You’re nothing, Alexander. You’re a worthless slut who just sold his body for money.”

“I-” Alexander felt tears fill his eyes.

“And maybe you can try to justify it in your head but we both know that you can’t. Not really. Since the first day I met you you’ve been tempting me, encouraging me. You made me want you. You forced me to fuck you.” Adams moved forwards again and gently pushed Alexander’s chin up, forcing him to stare into the man’s eyes. “No-one keeps you around for your mind. No-one wants your mind or your thoughts or your writing. No-one would even notice if you vanished right now. You’re one more whore and that’s it. So no, I won’t let you go.”

Alexander blinked as tears streamed down his face. He knew that what Adams was saying was true. No-one cared about him, not really. If they did then he wouldn’t be in this situation.

“Now you’re going to stay there for a few hours and think that over. I’m going to have a meal and then I’m going to have a shower. Then we’re going to film a second one.”

“But-”

“Don’t worry, I’ll wipe you down before we film again.” Adams glanced up and down Alexander critically. “You definitely need it.”

“John, please.” Alexander whispered through his tears. Adams just grinned and turned on his heel. As he left, he flipped the light switch off. Alexander lay there in the darkness, tears streaming down his cheeks. Up until that moment he hadn’t quite known what wanting to die felt like.

In that moment he knew exactly.


	4. Chapter 4

Aaron watched as Alexander sat down in class. He looked half the weight he had a week before. Alexander had his sleeve pulled down to his fingers and he was hunched over himself. At every loud noise he flinched and it made Aaron’s blood boil.

The teenager had once helped Aaron and there Aaron was, helpless to help him. It wasn’t fair.

The teacher turned and left the classroom to grab something and Aaron glanced behind him. John, Hercules, Lafayette and Thomas were all staring at Alexander. Aaron shook his head and stood. He sat down next to Alexander and ignored the flinch he got in return.

“Aaron?” Alexander asked, as if he didn’t understand.

“What’s wrong?” Aaron asked quietly. Alexander shook his head and tugged down on his sleeves. “You can tell me, Alexander. I won’t tell anyone else.”

“I can’t.” Alexander whispered, tears springing to his eyes. Aaron let out a sigh and he shook his head.

“Alexander, I can help you.”

“Why do you want to?”

“What?”

“Why do you want to waste your time on someone like me?” Alexander muttered. “I don’t get it.”

“You wasted time on me.”

“I didn’t waste it.”

“And I’m not wasting my time either.”

“I can’t give you anything though.”

“There’s nothing I want.”

“Really?” Alexander stared at Aaron untrustingly and Aaron felt his stomach drop. Something had happened, something terrible. Alexander was never normally like this, this closed off.

“Really. I brought you your lunch.” Aaron pulled the lunchbox out of his backpack and handed it to Alexander. Alexander reached for it slowly and Aaron watched as he grasped the box. As soon as he did, Aaron took hold of Alexander’s wrist and pulled his sleeve up. Alexander squeaked and dropped the box as he tried to pull his sleeve back down to his fingers. Aaron stared at the wrist he’d uncovered numbly, not caring that the lunchbox was on the floor or that half the class was staring at him.

“A-Aaron, it-it’s just-”

“Rope burn.” Aaron muttered. Alexander stared at him. Alexander was trembling like a leaf and he suddenly stood and bolted the room, leaving all of his stuff behind. John stood and hurried towards Aaron who stood and took a step towards the door.

“What the fuck was that?” John whispered. Aaron didn’t say a word, mind still working. “Aaron!”

“I think- I think we have a problem.”

“What?”

“I-” Aaron shook his head. He couldn’t say anything, not yet. Not without proof. Alexander wasn’t about to say anything to the police, especially if Aaron’s suspicions were correct. “We need proof.”

“And how the fuck are we meant to get that?”

“I don’t know.”

 

Alexander wasn’t even sure where he was going, didn’t know how he was getting there, until he slammed into an empty room. He sat down on the floor, back against the walls so he could see the door. It was then that he broke down. He had eight hundred dollars and six days left. If he managed to get overtime and every hour he could then he would be able to get the money he needed. He had to do it.

And, of course, if he took the ten dollars from Adams each night. He didn’t want to, he hated it with every fibre of his being but he’d do it. For his mother, he’d do almost anything.

Alexander jumped as he heard a knocking on the door. He snapped his head up but didn’t stand, wasn’t even sure if his legs could support him. The door opened to reveal Washington. Alexander stared at him numbly for a moment.

“Alexander? Are you okay?”

Alexander nodded slowly but didn’t say anything. Washington knelt down next to Alexander and frowned.

“What are you doing out of lessons?”

“I- I’m sorry, sir.” Alexander whispered.

“I’m not angry. I’m just worried.”

“I don’t know. I- I just ran.”

“Did something scare you?”

“I-it’s not important.”

“Alexander, you’re hiding in a supply closet. I think it is important.”

“I just- I screwed something up. Something that I- I can’t fix.”

“I doubt that. You’re an incredible young man, Alexander. One day you’re going to blow us all away, I’m sure.” Washington smiled gently at that but Alexander couldn’t return the smile.

“I- I’m not. I’m nothing. I’m worthless. I’m just- just a stupid, bastard, immigrant, whor-” Alexander shut his mouth and stared down at his feet. Washington frowned.

“Who told you those things?”

“Does it matter?”

“Yes. No-one deserves to be called those things. You are so far from stupid, Alexander. Being a bastard or an immigrant isn’t something that you should be ashamed of.”

“How many generations of your family have lived in America?” Alexander snapped, staring up at Washington. Washington nodded slowly.

“I don’t know, honestly.”

“Then who are you to talk about being an immigrant? I have nothing here. I- I have nobody.”

“You have your mother, you have your step father, you have your friends.”

“I guess.”

“Now then, you either have to get back to class or go home.”

“C-can I go home alone?”

“Yes.”

“And come back for my job tonight?”

“Why are you working in the library, Alexander?”

“Pays.”

“Does your stepfather not provide?”

“He does but- my mama is expensive. I don’t- I don’t always get nice stuff because he looks after her instead.”

“It shouldn’t be something he chooses. He decided to look after her when he married her. And he agreed to look after you.”

“I guess.” Alexander pulled himself in and sniffed gently. His sleeve slipped for a moment and Washington frowned at the red marks. He put his hand forward but Alexander flinched violently back and Washington froze.

“What happened there?”

“I fell out of bed this morning. Landed on it.”

“Do you want to go to the nurse for it?”

“N-no.” Alexander brought his arms closer. Washington sighed.

“Go home, Alexander. Don’t bother coming to work tonight.”

“Sir!”

“No, Alexander. You’re obviously unwell and-”

“N-no I swear I can do it! I- I’ll be fine! I can-”

“Alexander,” A dangerous tone entered Washington’s voice and Alexander silenced himself. “As the headmaster, I say you are in no fit state.”

“But- please, sir.”

“No.”

Alexander stared down at his hands before he slowly nodded and rose. He left the room, the building, the school, feeling numb.

He wasn’t going to have enough.

 

Alexander stood outside his own front door and stared at it for several long moments. His key was in his bag, back at school. He had to ring the bell. He had to face Adams and tell him just why he was so early.

The door swung open and Alexander blinked in surprise at the man he didn’t recognise. Adams didn’t tend to bring other people around to the house. The man stared down at Alexander before he smiled.

“Well, you must be Alexander.”

“W-who are you?”

“John, your little star’s here!”

Alexander glanced behind him and debated just running, just turning and sprinting as hard as he could in the opposite direction. That thought was cut off as the man grabbed Alexander’s wrist in a bone crushing grip.

“We wouldn’t want you running off anywhere, now would we?”

“I-” Alexander broke off as the man pulled him into the house. Adams appeared at the bottom of the stairs and stared at Alexander.

“What are you doing back here?”

“I- I got sent home.”

“Why?”

“I wasn’t feeling well.” Alexander admitted quietly. He couldn’t tell Adams that Washington suspected something, Aaron suspecting was bad enough, Washington had power.

“That so?”

“Yes, sir.”

“You interrupted James and me.”

“I’m sorry, sir. I- I can go to my room and-”

“Don’t you want to know what James was doing here?”

“I- I don’t mind, sir. If he- if he wants to tell me.”

“Jesus,” James broke in. “He’s like some kind of dog. How’d you do that?”

“Discipline. Now how about you ask Reynolds why he’s here, bastard.”

Alexander slowly turned to Reynolds who was staring at him with a hungry wonder in his eyes that made Alexander’s stomach drop.

“Wh-why are you here, James?”

“I help to edit videos. Do you want to guess what video I’ve been editing, bitch?”

Alexander whirled on Adams, mouth open in horror. Both men started to laugh at the expression.

“You- you-” Alexander broke off in a whimper at the thought of this stranger going over the videos, watching as Adams fucked him. “I-” Alexander broke off again, having nothing else to say.

“I decided that if we’re doing this, we might as well do it properly.” Adams muttered quietly as he stepped towards Alexander. Alexander tensed but didn’t move a muscle. Adams raised a hand to Alexander’s face and traced his hand down, almost mockingly. “What do you think, bastard?”

“I- I don’t want any of this.” Alexander whispered. “I don’t want-”

“What you want doesn’t matter anymore.” Adams growled. The hand that had been on Alexander’s face found his ponytail and twisted. Alexander yelped out in pain as Adams then yanked him up so he had to stand on tip toes to avoid his hair being ripped out. “Understand?”

“Yes, sir.” Alexander whispered. Adams released him and Alexander collapsed to the floor. He took in several deep breaths, willing the tears in his eyes to dissipate. He didn’t want to show that much weakness in front of Adams, let alone Reynolds. He deserved some kind of dignity.

Didn’t he?

“Get up, bastard.” Adams growled, kicking Alexander’s side. Alexander pulled himself to his feet and stared up at Adams. “You’ve been a bad boy today. Do you understand?”

“Please, sir, I didn’t-” Alexander was cut off as he was slapped across the face again. He tasted blood in his mouth and he looked down. “I’m sorry, sir.” Alexander whispered.

“You’ve been rude to me and to my guest. Now I think that you need a way to make it up to us. Can you think of a way?”

“Sir, I-” Another slap caused Alexander to stop talking. Adams sighed and shook his head.

“You still talk too much.”

“Please.” Alexander whispered.

“Think of a punishment or I will.” Adams’ voice was low and dangerous. Alexander knew he wasn’t joking anymore, never had been. He could either say what Adams was hinting at or could suffer something much worse.

“You can f-film me.” Alexander whispered.

“What did you say?”

“You can film me.” Alexander forced his voice to be stronger as he looked at Adams. “You- you can film me and do anything you want to me. Th-that way you can- you can get off and Reynolds can have more video to edit.”

“You really think I’d let a guest of mine have to just watch? That’s hardly fair.” Adams shook his head. “That punishment isn’t enough, Alexander. I guess-”

“He can do it too! He can- can fuck me too. You can do anything to me! An-anything.” Alexander whispered the last thing and sniffed. Adams grinned and Alexander felt sick.

“What a good plan.” Adams grabbed Alexander’s wrists, ignoring the flinch of pain he got, and dragged the teenager up to his room. Reynolds followed eagerly behind.

When they reached the room Alexander was pushed down onto the bed and tied up once more. He tried to breathe through the pain as the ropes were attached too tightly and they scraped at his already injured wrists.

When he opened his eyes the camera’s light was red and the two men, complete with masks, were advancing.

“Wait, wh-where’s my mask?” Alexander asked. His face was obvious to anyone who watched this. It would be uploaded to the internet, there would be no way to get it down. He could feel his breathing begin to pick up at that thought. He had to have a mask.

“You only bought two, bastard.” Adams breathed into one ear. Alexander opened his mouth to argue back but was silenced as a gag was forced into his mouth. “Now shut up and take it.”

 

Alexander lay on his own bed, the covers thrown over his head. Tears dribbled down his face and he felt like shit. He didn’t know how much of that he could blame on the two men and how much was simply down to what he was willing to do now, how far he’d fallen in just a few days.

It seemed impossible that it had been just over a week but that was all. Nine days ago he’d been a virgin. Nine days ago he’d dreamed of losing his virginity to Angelica Schuyler in the year above. Or maybe to John Laurens. Or maybe, in some of his weirder dreams, to Thomas Jefferson.

He hadn’t expected it to be his step-father.

Alexander felt another wave of tears hit him and he curled into himself and clutched the twenty dollars in his hand tight.

He was a cheap, ten dollar whore. There was nothing that could change that.


	5. Chapter 5

Alexander woke but didn’t start moving. He glanced over to his phone but didn’t move towards it. It felt like his energy had been sapped, as if he had nothing left. He knew he’d fallen asleep crying the previous night but that was nothing new.

Falling asleep not crying was more of a surprise.

Alexander slowly reached for his phone and let out a sigh as he realised he was going to be late for school. He slowly stood and pulled clothes on, ignoring how they hung loosely on his figure or how he felt like he was immediately dirtying them just by him wearing them.

It had been fourteen days since the deadline was given.

Alexander was barely sure if he was alive anymore. Adams dominated almost every thought in his head and even though he knew he had enough, had more than enough, the thought still terrified him of what could happen.

He was only in America because of Adams, because Adams was an American citizen, a gift that had never been given to Alexander or his mother.

A knock on the door sounded and Alexander whirled around. The door opened to reveal Adams. He stared at Alexander’s exposed chest before Alexander hurriedly covered himself.

“Yes, sir?” Alexander said softly. Adams smiled and stepped forwards into the room. He pressed Alexander against the wall and began to kiss him deeply. Alexander forced his body to relax as his step-father’s tongue delved deeper and deeper into his mouth.

He didn’t know why but he hated it the most when Adams kissed him, when he pretended to love Alexander, when he pretended Alexander was worth loving. Most of the time it was easy enough to pretend, to just assure himself that Adams hated him and was just using him. In the tender moments like this it was far too easy to remember that Alexander didn’t say no, didn’t put up any fight. He just allowed it to happen.

“You’re going to be late.” Adams whispered. Alexander nodded numbly. “Do you want a lift?”

“R-really?” Alexander looked up in surprise, Adams very rarely drove Alexander anywhere. He typically forced Alexander to walk, telling him that no-one wanted a fat bastard.

“I mean, you’d have to repay the favour but I think I know how.”

“No. I- I’m okay.” Alexander tried to pull away but Adams grabbed his shoulders and slammed him into the wall. Alexander wheezed as all the air was sucked out of his lungs by the force. Adams stared down at him in disgust and Alexander kicked himself for wanting this, preferring it to when he was being treated well.

He really was fucked up.

“If I tell you something is happening you don’t deny it, got it?”

“Yes, sir.” Alexander whispered. Adams stared at him and scoffed.

“Get in the car.”

Alexander trailed after Adams, head down and struggling not to burst into tears. He sat in the car and stared out the window even as he felt a hand creeping up his thigh. When the car slowed to a stop in the middle of nowhere, Alexander shouldn’t have been surprised.

He somehow still was.

 

“He’s not normally this late, right?” Thomas asked, wringing his hands. James rolled his eyes and looked back down at his work.

“I don’t know, he’s _your_ frenemy.”

“He’s my enemy.”

“Then why are you worried about him?”

“Why aren’t you worried about him?”

“It’s Alexander Hamilton. He can overcome anything.”

“What if he’s found something he can’t overcome?” Thomas asked quietly. James glanced at him and frowned.

“You think that’s true?”

“I dunno. It’s just this- this feeling that maybe-” Thomas broke off as Alexander limped into the classroom. His clothes were rumpled and his shirt was untucked. The bags under his eyes were prominent from across the classroom and he moved like a zombie.

Alexander collapsed into his seat next to Hercules who immediately turned and started to whisper to him. Thomas tried to catch a word of the conversation but he couldn’t hear anything.

“Just admit you’re pining over him.” James muttered as he scribbled down an answer.

“Excuse me?”

“Admit you’re pining and everything will be easier.”

“I hardly see how-”

“Everyone can see something’s going on with him. I’m not stupid, I know that.” James put down his pen. “And maybe it’s his mother like some people say. Maybe it’s his step-father like other people say. Maybe it’s his birth father like some people say. Maybe the person he viewed as his son was shot and killed in an eighteenth century style duel for his honour and the guilt from that ripped his life apart. We don’t know. And you won’t know until you go and talk to him.”

“It’s none of my business though.”

“It became your business when he walked into class with a limp that bad.” James stared at Alexander for a moment. “I know the guy and he’s tough. But maybe having someone else to lean on wouldn’t be a bad thing.”

“Hey, what was that thing with the duel?”

“Oh, I dunno. Seems about as likely as the rest. We have a really weird rumour mill here.”

“Yeah. I guess.” Thomas continued to stare at Alexander and frowned. Alexander was scratching at the base of his neck, just where it hit his shoulder. As he moved his hand away, Thomas saw a dark bruise had been sucked into it. “He’s got a hickie.” Thomas muttered. James glanced at Alexander but he’d already moved his hand away.

“Maybe he’s got a crazy girlfriend. Or boyfriend. My point is, either go and talk to him like a normal human or stop stalking him. Either way will work out but if you continue to do this then you’re just going to get into another fight with him.”

 

Aaron watched as Alexander didn’t eat a single piece of the lunch he’d made for him. It turned Aaron’s stomach when Alexander didn’t eat. Aaron had tried to include the foods that he knew Alexander liked but nothing seemed to help.

“Are you going to eat something?” Aaron asked quietly. Alexander stared down at his lunchbox as if only just realising it was there. He put out a shaky hand to pick up the sandwich but then paused and lowered his hand.

“No-not hungry.”

“Petit, we are worried.” Lafayette said softly.

“I’m fine.” Alexander muttered. He didn’t raise his eyes from the lunchbox and his voice was still so quiet. His friends exchanged glances over his head and frowned.

“I-” Before Hercules could say anything else, there was a cough behind him and he turned to see James and Thomas stood awkwardly behind him.

“Uh- we were wondering if there’s room for us?” Thomas asked. The table stared at him in confusion but Thomas wasn’t looking at them. He was staring at Alexander who looked wrecked.

“Sure?” John said, not convinced. James and Thomas sat down, Thomas directly across from Alexander. Alexander didn’t even look up, just continued to stare at the food in front of him.

“So, uh- how are you, Hamilton?”

“What?” Alexander blinked and looked up, looking surprised to see Thomas there. “What do you want?”

“Just to eat.”

“Oh.” Alexander nodded and looked back down. Thomas shot a look to Lafayette who just shrugged.

“Are you okay?”

“Can people quit asking me that?” Alexander groused. “I’m fine. I-”

“You haven’t eaten anything in the lunchboxes for three days.” Aaron interrupted. Alexander glared at him and grabbed a piece of celery. He bit into it and chewed almost vindictively. When it came to the second bite he stared at the celery for a moment too long before he slowly put it back down.

“I’m not hungry.” Alexander muttered.

“What’s the deal with the lunchboxes?” Thomas asked. The group turned to him in surprise.

“My step dad forgot to feed me for a while.” Alexander said softly. Thomas’ eyes widened in surprise. “So Aaron goes overboard and makes me a lunch every day.”

“You were stealing food from a bin.” John responded. “That forced even Aaron to do something!”

“It wasn’t-” Alexander sighed. “It’s complicated.”

“Does he feed you now? Cause you’re losing weight. Like a lot of weight. Not that I notice. Or that I was looking but even not really looking, not to say that I was even kinda looking in the first place-”

“Shut up.” James whispered. Thomas closed his mouth and nodded. Alexander stared at him for a moment before he sighed.

“Yeah, I’m being fed. Course I am. Course.” Alexander stared down at the food in front of him and the sick feeling in his stomach seemed to pass to everyone as they understood the implications of his poorly told lie.

 

The moment Alexander was through the door, Adams was on him. He pressed Alexander against the wall and kissed him deeply. He then began to fiddle with Alexander’s belt and it was just Alexander’s squeak of fear that made him pause for a moment.

Adams pulled back and Alexander cowered back as he smelt alcohol on the man’s breath.

“Where’ve you been?” Adams slurred out.

“School.”

“Why?”

“I- I have to. It’s the law.”

“I want you here. Want my slut with me all the time.” Adams leant forwards and kissed Alexander again. Alexander screwed his eyes tight shut and allowed it to happen. He didn’t even fight as Adams undid his own belt.

Afterwards, Adams collapsed against Alexander, exhausted. He continued to pepper Alexander’s face with sloppy kisses as he did himself up with one hand.

“So good to me, little slut.” Adams whispered. Alexander nodded stiffy. He whimpered slightly as he felt Adams’ teeth latch onto the intersection of his neck and shoulder. The bruise already there complained as Adams began to suck like a leach but Alexander couldn’t do anything to stop him. “We’re going to do so much.”

“N-no. The- the two weeks are- are over!” Alexander pushed back, putting all the strength he had left into the movement. Adams stumbled backwards, face darkening. “I- I’m not your slut or your- or your whore! I won’t let myself be filmed or- or put down just do you can get off! I’m done! I’m fucking done!”

“Really?” Adams growled. He grabbed Alexander’s throat and began to squeeze. Alexander gasped and scrabbled at the fingers, trying desperately to get free. “Cause I think you’re going to be my perfect little slut as long as your mother’s alive. I think that every month you’re going to bring in two thousand dollars. You’ve already proved that you can. And maybe in the future that’ll go up. Think of it like rent. Compensation for having to put up with filthy vermin like you.”

With that, Adams threw Alexander to the floor. Alexander curled in on himself instinctively but Adams didn’t attack him further.

“I’m sorry, sir.” Alexander whimpered out. Adams grinned and advanced. He crouched down next to Alexander, close enough for Alexander to smell the alcohol.

“Now then, stay right there. All you have to do is trust me. Let me do what I want and I promise that everything will be fine.”

“Yes, sir.”

Adams turned on his heel and walked out the door. Alexander curled further in on himself as tears slipped down his face. He didn’t know how he’d been so naïve to actually think that Adams would let him go, that this could all be over.

“Well you really fucked that up.”

Alexander jumped at the voice and whirled around to see Reynolds on the stairs staring down at him. Alexander scrambled to his feet as Reynolds descended the stairs.

“I’m sorry, sir. Adams is-”

“Out. I know. I saw.” Reynolds pulled down Alexander’s jumper and stared for a long moment at the dark bruise Adams had just added to. “You bruise wonderfully, Alexander.”

Alexander sucked in a shaky breath. It was never good when Reynolds called him by his name.

“Thank you, sir.”

“It’s quite wonderful.” Reynolds muttered, tracing a finger around the circular bruise. “I wonder sometimes what it would be like to have you alone, without your blasted step father around.”

“I d-don’t think-”

“Good.” Reynolds’ voice hardened and Alexander flinched back. “You’re not smart enough to think. Now then, you let me do anything I want and I’ll pay you double what Adams is paying. Now what is he paying?”

“Fifteen d-dollars per fuck.” Alexander blurted out before he could think it through.

“Huh.” Reynolds nodded and reached for his wallet. He rifled through it for a moment and Alexander couldn’t help as he leant forwards. Then Reynolds closed the wallet with a snap and slapped Alexander across the face with it. Alexander stumbled backwards and stared at Reynolds in horror. “First rule, bitch,” Reynolds’ voice was cold and dangerous. “Don’t lie to me.”

“I’m sorry, sir.”

“I’ll pay you twenty dollars every fuck. I’ll hook you up with other people who’ll pay half to you. The ten dollars you deserve. Got it?”

“Adams will find out.” Alexander whispered. “H-he’ll be mad.”

“And if you say no to me once more then I’ll be mad.” Reynolds stepped forwards and shoved Alexander back. “Who are you more afraid of?”

“I’ll do it.” Alexander’s voice cracked and Reynolds grinned.

“Good choice, bitch.” He then suddenly threw Alexander to the floor. Alexander caught himself on his wrist but it was at a bad angle and he cried out in pain. Reynolds loomed above him with a smile. “Keep quiet.” Reynolds began to fiddle with his belt and Alexander blinked away the tears forming in his eyes. “And nobody needs to know.”


	6. Chapter 6

Over the next three weeks Alexander felt his grip on sanity slipping away. He went to school and could barely listen as every instinct he had told him to run. His performance in school dropped suddenly and he was nearly failing every class he had.

When he got home he was subjected either to Reynolds or Adams or, on the worse days, the men that Reynolds brought back. On those days he was sure he stopped existing. He’d just wake up afterwards with money stuffed under a note on the side.

The note normally told him just what he’d done- explained it in detail so explicit he’d broken into tears just reading it. After the first few times he stopped reading them. He also stopped counting the money the first time fifty dollars appeared on the side. He could do the simple maths there and it horrified him.

Five men.

Five men and he didn’t remember any of it.

He’d thrown up a lot that evening. Then he’d crawled into his mother’s bed and cried as she didn’t respond, as she never responded. He was terrified for her and terrified that he knew what was happening.

The machines around her could keep her alive but he didn’t have the technology to make her better. No-one did.

Alexander was pretty sure that when she died he’d do the same. Jump off a building or tie a noose, or maybe just stop eating the tiny amounts he could still stomach. He could waste away to the nothing he truly was.

He knew it wouldn’t make any difference, not to the people around him. They’d be happy when he finally left, when he stopped being such a burden on them.

But he couldn’t. Not yet, not until his mother was safe.

Alexander was shaken from his thoughts as the door opened. He whimpered in fear around the gag in his mouth as Adams stepped into the room. Reynolds didn’t notice for a moment, far too busy with Alexander.

“What the fuck is going on in here?” Adams asked, voice dangerous. Reynolds jumped and whirled around. His expression changed several times before he settled on placating.

“I decided to take the bitch out for a spin. A simple-”

“Without my permission?”

“I didn’t think you’d have a problem with it.”

“It is mine!”

Alexander winced at that, at how they were talking about him as if he was an object and nothing more. Maybe that was all he was. He didn’t exactly feel like much more with his limbs tied back, a gag in his mouth and the red light on the camera watching him.

“I was just using it.”

“You ask me.”

“Fine, can I fuck your precious little bitch?”

“How long has this been going on?”

“What?”

“How long have you been fucking the bastard?”

“A few weeks.”

“Weeks?”

“I thought the bitch told you.” Reynolds said, innocence on his face. Alexander felt his heart stop for a moment as Adams’ cold gaze landed on him.

“He didn’t. Finish up whatever you’re doing. Then come see me, bastard.”

Alexander nodded and the door closed behind him. He stared up at Reynolds who just grinned back.

“Why do I feel I just got you into trouble?”

 

“Kneel.” Adams commanded. Alexander slowly sank to his knees. He was only wearing his underwear. Reynolds had ripped the rest of his clothes when he was getting them off and he didn’t see the point in getting new ones for Adams to ruin with whatever he was about to do. “So you didn’t tell me about your little arrangement. Why not?”

“I didn’t think it mattered.” Alexander whispered, voice hoarse. Adams slapped him and Alexander closed his eyes for a moment before forcing himself to look ahead again.

“You are my property and you thought it wasn’t important?”

“B-because you’ve been okay with us doing it before.”

“When I was there. When I was overseeing it. God, you’re such a slut that I can’t even satisfy you, can I? You had to run off to Reynolds. Well that’s not acceptable.”

“What?”

“The best way for someone like you to learn is pain.” Adams pulled a wooden walking stick from the hat stand. He weighed it in his hand for a moment and Alexander could see just how heavy it was.

“Sir, please I- I-”

“The time for talk is over.” Adams approached and Alexander scrambled to his feet to run but before he could, Adams aimed a swipe at his legs. Alexander fell down in a tangle of limbs and terror. “Trying to run will make it worse.” Adams warned.

“Please-”

“Shut up.” Adams brought the stick down with all his strength across Alexander’s back. Alexander shouted in pain as Adams repeated the action across the back of his knees. Then it was his ribs, his chest, his knees again, his arms. The pain began to merge into one as Adams began to beat him into a bloody mess.

At some point, Adams threw the stick aside and just used his fists and feet to hurt every inch of skin he could. Alexander cried out and drew himself into a ball, causing kick after kick to land on his back until Adams yanked him up by his hair. Alexander felt strands snapping but couldn’t focus on that as the next thing Adams did was deliver a resounding punch to his face.

Alexander didn’t know everything that happened after that. At some point he must have passed out because when he woke up he was in a dark, confined space. His breathing sped up and he tried to move his legs but there wasn’t enough room. He then tried to move his arms and screamed out in pain as his right arm refused to respond properly.

In the pitch blackness Alexander couldn’t tell anything for sure but he’d bet good money that the arm was broken. Adams had probably freaked out at that and dumped him somewhere in the house he didn’t have to look at him, somewhere Alexander couldn’t get out.

Alexander curled in on himself and sobbed. So this was what he got for being a worthless whore.

Honestly, he’d thought it would be worse.

 

Alexander was let out at some point deep into the night. Adams didn’t let a word slip out, shoving a gag into Alexander’s mouth. He then dragged the teenager to his bed and threw him down. Alexander’s vision whited out for a second at the agony as his arm bounced against the bed.

Then Adams was on him and there was no room for thought as Alexander’s consciousness shied away from the world.

When Adams was finished, Alexander pulled himself out of the bed and hobbled to the bathroom. He cleaned the blood away and then stared at his arm. He was sure it was broken and he had no idea what to do about it.

He couldn’t go to a hospital, they’d see the other injuries. He couldn’t leave it to set on its own because it would more likely than not, set wrong. The only option he had left was to set it himself. The thought set his stomach roiling but he steeled himself.

Alexander crept downstairs and entered the kitchen. He took one of the wooden spoons and laid it on the table next to him. He stared between it and his arm for a moment and then shook his head. He felt a few seconds away from throwing up.

A thought popped into his head and Alexander grabbed for his mobile phone. He typed in a number and closed his eyes in a silent prayer. After several rings a tired voice answered.

“Alexander?”

“Aaron, I need help.”

“Help?” Aaron asked, tiredness slowing him. “Wh-what’s wrong?”

“Can you set a broken arm?” Alexander whispered. Aaron was silent for a long moment and then there was the rustle of clothing, as if he had just bolted upright.

“Where are you?”

“Going to your house.”

“Alexander-”

“Please, Aaron. You- you always said you owed me one. From- from getting you out.”

“And every damn instinct I have is telling me to use that favour to get you out.”

“You can’t.”

“I don’t want to fucking enable this, Alexander.”

“Then my arm is going to set badly and I- I’ll never be able to write again.” Alexander didn’t quite manage to keep the tears out of his voice. Aaron sighed before he spoke again.

“I’ll help.”

“Thank you so much.” Alexander whispered.

 

Aaron opened the door as a new text from Alexander popped up. He stared at Alexander and let out a long breath.

“Fucking hell.”

“You don’t- don’t normally swear.” Alexander muttered, wiping his nose on his sleeve. Aaron just shook his head.

“Your step father?”

“Aaron-”

“Please just tell me.”

“Yeah.”

“Why?”

“Complicated.”

“Alexander-”

“Please, Aaron. Just- just help me.”

“I’m not going to set your arm.”

“What?”

“Shh.” Aaron glanced behind him into the rest of the house. “My foster mother is, okay?”

“No!”

“I told her you got into a fight and don’t want it to go on your permanent record. She won’t tell anyone.”

“But-”

“She’s a nurse and she knows how to help.”

“Okay.”

Aaron blinked in surprise at how quickly Alexander folded. He paused for a second before he ushered Alexander inside. He noted as he did, how heavily Alexander was limping.

Martha was waiting in the kitchen and she scowled as soon as she caught sight of Alexander. Alexander shied back for a moment but then Aaron was beside him.

“Alexander, this is Martha Washington, Martha, this is Alexander Hamilton.”

“Who did you get in a fight with?”

“One of the guys on my block.” Alexander muttered quietly. “He’s homophobic.”

“And you’re gay?” Martha asked as she gently rolled up the sleeve. A mixture of emotions crossed Alexander’s face. Two months ago the answer would have been easy. He was bisexual. But now the thought of sex repulsed him, the idea of a man kissing him just summoned the images of Adams’ tongue in his mouth.

“Does that matter?”

“No.” Martha poked part of Alexander’s arm and he hissed in pain, retracting his arm.

“Sorry.” Alexander said softly, forcing himself to extend his arm again.

“It’s okay. It’s just a reflex.” Martha continued to gently poke at the arm until Alexander had tears in his eyes. “I think this is broken. I can’t confirm it without an x-ray but that would need a hospital and-”

“N-no. Please.”

“Of course.” Martha sighed. “This will hurt.”

“I can take it.”

Aaron looked on with a frown on his face. Alexander took it without screaming once, without even making a noise. It wasn’t proof in and of itself but Aaron knew what that forced silence meant, better than most.

Alexander was used to being hurt.

 

Alexander sat awkwardly at the breakfast table. Lafayette kept on sneaking him glances, as did Aaron. Martha and Washington were deep in conversation but Alexander couldn’t follow it for the life of him.

“You should eat, petite.” Lafayette muttered. Alexander nodded and stared down at the toast in front of him. It was nicer than the food he got at home, if he ever got food that was, but he still couldn’t bring himself to eat it.

“So Alexander, won’t your parents be worried about you?” Washington asked. Alexander glanced at him and shook his head.

“M- my step-father works from home and normally wakes up after I leave for school. And my mama…” Alexander stared down at his hands and didn’t say anything else. Washington stared at Alexander’s hands as well, at the perfectly clear skin on his knuckles. They weren’t bruised or bloodied.

It was as if the fight had been entirely one-sided.

“Well, if you’re struggling, do tell us. My family is here for you.”

“Thank you, sir.” Alexander muttered. Washington sighed but before he could say anything else, Alexander’s phone buzzed. He immediately paled and grabbed for it. Surely Adams hadn’t noticed his absence, he couldn’t have. It would be-

**From: Jefferson**

**I need to talk to you**

**To: Jefferson**

**What?**

**From: Jefferson**

**I need to fucking talk to you right this fucking second, okay?**

**To: Jefferson**

**This is Alexander, are you meaning to send me these texts?**

**From: Jefferson**

**Yes. Meet me at the bike shed before school**

**To: Jefferson**

**Why?**

**From: Jefferson**

**I’ll explain everything later**

 

Alexander stood outside the bike shed shivering. He didn’t know what Thomas had meant by before school so he’d been waiting for half an hour already.

“Alexander.”

Alexander whirled around to see Thomas stood behind him.

“Wh-what do you w-want?”

“What happened to your arm?”

“D-doesn’t ma-matter.”

“Alexander-”

“What do you w-want?”

“Look.” Thomas pulled his phone from his pocket and loaded up the internet. “I- I wasn’t looking for it. I swear. I- I mean, how would I even know? It’s not like I was expecting to find- to find that.” Thomas laughed, a short laugh that was devoid of humour. “But I did. I- I found it and- Alexander, other people will find it as well. I don’t-”

“Wh-what is it?”

Thomas sucked in a breath before he turned the phone around. Alexander stared at the screen for a few moments as he tried to work out what it was showing. There was a teenager, who was far too thin, tied down to a bed, face twisted in pain as three men in masks swarmed around him.

“I don’t understand.” Alexander whispered. “So you watch porn, that’s pretty-”

“Look at the kid’s face.” Thomas said softly. Alexander stared at it and felt the breath in his lungs vanish as he recognised his own face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are not enough fics where Aaron is adopted, despite being a fucking orphan. I also haven't seen enough where he's adopted by the Washingtons. So if anyone's confused, Laf was adopted several years before Aaron (when Laf was still a young kid, when his parents died) and Aaron was adopted when he was removed from his uncle's care (which we will learn a lot more about)  
> Also, how do you think Jefferson will respond to this? Do you think he'll try to help Alexander or not?


	7. Chapter 7

Thomas sighed as Alexander stayed frozen, staring at the screen in front of him. He pocketed the phone and watched as Alexander continued to stare ahead, blankly.

“Look, if you want to make porn I don’t have a problem with it but for god’s sake, you’re underage!”

“I- I’m seventeen!”

“And you have to be eighteen to make porn!”

“I-”

“I didn’t watch many of the others but there are- there are so many.” Thomas shook his head. “Alexander, this is a federal crime. I don’t understand why you of all people would choose to throw away-”

“Choose?” Alexander let out a choked laugh and Thomas paused.

“What-”

“You think I choose to let them touch me? To fuck me? You- you think I let them tie me down and hurt me?” Alexander’s voice broke and he felt tears spring to his eyes. “You think I wanted my virginity to be taken by my fucking step father? Or that I have to sleep with men I’ve never met, unprotected, just so I can keep my mama alive? You think-”

“What the fuck?” Thomas breathed. Alexander stared at him and suddenly his brain caught up with his mouth. He whimpered and bit down on his lower lip. “You- you didn’t choose? You didn’t- you didn’t consent.” Thomas muttered. He stared down at the phone and then back at Alexander. “You didn’t consent to any of it.”

“I was meant to wear a mask.” Alexander whispered. “And then I was just meant to fuck him. And- and then it was just the two of them. And- and then- then-”

“Jesus Christ.”

“I know.” Alexander looked down. “I know I’m a worthless, cheap whore. I know that, Thomas. You don’t need to fucking remind me.”

“Fuck.” Thomas looked away, trying to process what he’d just been told. “Your step father took your virginity?”

“A month and a half ago.” Alexander whispered. “A- a week later, he made the first video.”

“And-” Thomas breathed out. “You have to go to the police, Alexander.”

“I can’t.”

“This is a federal offence, Alexander. Raping you, that’s more. Forcing you to be in these videos, he could go away for a long time. A very long time.”

“He can’t.” Alexander said softly.

“Why not?”

“Because I’m not a citizen. My mama- they’re married and so I’m protected but- the moment they’re not then I’m not legal. I’ll be deported.”

“Haven’t you lived here long enough?”

“I haven’t started the process.”

“But-”

“And without his job mama’s care would be impossible. And he promised-” Alexander suddenly stopped talking and his eyes widened.

“What’s the problem?”

“He said he’d kill her if- if I told anyone.” Alexander stared at Thomas with fear evident in his face.

“Alexander-”

Thomas wasn’t quick enough to grab Alexander’s arm as he turned and ran for his life.

 

Aaron got along with Thomas quite well. They had very different stances on a lot of topics but in general they got on.

They didn’t get on quite so well when Thomas burst into his classroom and threw his phone at Aaron, a phone that showed someone being fucked by several men in masks.

“What the fuck?” Aaron stood, to distance himself from the phone. Thomas glanced at it and winced as he realised it was playing. He paused it and then shoved it into Aaron’s face.

“Look!”

“Thomas, I’m kind of…” Aaron trailed off as he caught sight of the teenager’s face. “Alexander?”

“It’s not live but holy fuck!”

“I don’t-”

“Come with me.” Thomas ordered and strode out of the room. He made his way to a secluded room and locked the door behind him. “Alexander just told me his step father has been raping him for the last month and a half and forcing him to take part in these pornos. Then he ran off.”

“What?”

“I know!”

“His step father?” Aaron asked quietly. He’d never met the man and Alexander didn’t talk about him a lot. But it made plenty of sense.

“This is fucked up and I don’t know what to do.”

“You did the right thing.” Aaron muttered. He rifled through his pockets and brought out his phone. He rang Alexander’s number and held his breath.

After seven rings, Alexander picked up.

“A-Aaron?” Alexander whispered. Aaron closed his eyes as he heard how much pain his friend was in.

“Yeah, buddy. It’s me.” Aaron stood and Thomas followed the movement. “You okay?”

“No.”

“Thomas says you haven’t been okay for a while.”

“Sorry I lied.”

“I knew you were.”

“I just- I just want to be free of this.”

“Where are you now?”

“I dunno.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“He put me in a box.” Alexander whispered. “I can’t move and I- I think my ribs are broken. He threw my phone but I- I couldn’t call you.”

“Okay. I’m going to call the police, Alexander.” There was no sound for a long moment until Aaron heard Alexander’s sobs down the phone. “Alexander?”

“O- okay.” Alexander whispered.

“Is your step father still there?”

“I don’t think so.”

“I’ll be there soon.”

Aaron hung up and turned to Thomas who was staring at him with wide eyes.

“Can you drive?”

“Yeah. You got directions?”

“Of course.” Aaron ran down the halls, forcing Thomas to keep up with him. He’d waited for long enough, now was the time for action.

 

The house was silent as they neared it. There was a policeman stood outside and Thomas quickly explained the situation and the man broke down the door. Aaron then pulled his phone out and rang Alexander’s number.

The ringing pulled him up the stairs until he was standing in a master bedroom. He could see ropes tied around the bed and he felt sick as he remembered the bloody wrists Alexander had tried so desperately to hide.

The ringing pushed Aaron further into the room, into the closet. At the bottom of the closet was a box, a few feet in each direction, locked with a padlock.

“There’s no way he’s in that.” Thomas muttered, looking sick. “He’s small but-”

“Look for the key.” Aaron commanded. Thomas shook his head and pushed Aaron aside. He reached into his hair and pulled out a pin that was keeping part of it back. “You can pick locks?”

“Shh.” Thomas muttered back. The padlock popped open and Thomas recoiled as Alexander was revealed. Aaron moved forwards and gently pulled him from the box. Alexander’s skin was ashen, the small parts of it that weren’t covered with dark bruises or the blood that seeped out of the box onto the pale carpet.

“Call an ambulance!” Aaron shouted as he pressed his ear against Alexander’s chest. He could hear a heartbeat but it was weak, just like Alexander’s breathing. “Don’t die on me now.” Aaron whispered. “Come on, Alexander. Come on!”

 

The next time Alexander opened his eyes it was to the sight of a hospital room. He expected horror to wash over him but it didn’t. Instead exhaustion hit him and he closed his eyes again.

“You know that’s not a good way to hide.” Aaron’s soft voice broke through Alexander’s thoughts and he smiled weakly.

“H-” Alexander broke off with a whine and Aaron shifted forwards.

“Don’t strain yourself.” Aaron whispered. Alexander nodded weakly. “You- you were in a really bad shape when we found you. Thomas and I.”

Alexander widened his eyes at Thomas’ name and Aaron nodded.

“I wouldn’t have expected it either. But he- he found-” Aaron broke off with a sigh. “He found the porn website.”

Alexander stared at Aaron for a moment before he looked away.

“Alexander, I- I don’t understand why you didn’t tell me.”

“I’m weak.” Alexander whispered. Aaron opened his mouth to argue but Alexander spoke over him. “I didn’t fight.”

“Alexander, it doesn’t matter if you fought. They found injuries on you that can’t be accidental. They did a scan of your arm and saw that its been partly broken at least three times in the last year. I- I don’t understand how you didn’t tell anyone.”

“Didn’t need to.”

“You’re in a hospital bed after your step father raped you, beat you and pushed you into a box not even big enough to hold a medium sized dog. You need to accept help sooner, Alexander.”

“Where is he?”

“We don’t know.”

“What?”

“Don’t worry, there’s a guard posted outside your door, 24/7. When you go into foster care you’re going to be living with me and the Washington’s.”

“Don’t need charity.”

“Should have worried about that before you got a pneumothorax.” Alexander looked up in surprise at those words and Aaron sighed. “They won’t explain everything to me, I’m not family. But you know how I hear things.”

“My lung collapsed?”

“Partially. They- they had to pull you into theatre immediately. Washington wouldn’t say anything to me but I looked at your notes. One of your broken ribs was jostled, it stuck into your lung and punctured it.”

“How long have I been out?”

“Three or four days.”

“And he isn’t here?”

“No. No-one’s heard a word from him. The police think he ran to protect his skin. He’s going to be in a lot of trouble if they do ever catch him. He’ll never live a normal life again.”

“What?”

“Even if he doesn’t get prison for life then he’ll be on the sex offenders register.”

“But-” Alexander frowned. That didn’t feel right. It had been his fault after all, he’d tempted his step-father, forced his hand.

“What’s wrong, Alexander?”

“Nothing.” Alexander muttered. He was hurting people, was just being a selfish whore like usual.

“Alexander-”

“It’s nothing.”

“Okay. I need to go and tell Washington you’re awake. Is that okay?”

“Fine.”

Aaron paused for a moment before he turned and left the room. Alexander closed his eyes and felt tears gathering in them. He hated this, hated how weak he was. There he was, crying alone in a hospital room because he wasn’t even good enough to keep one little secret.

He was pathetic and now he had to make sure that none of his friends worked that out because they could do far, far worse than Adams had ever done.


	8. Chapter 8

Lafayette sat beside Alexander’s bed, staring at the sleeping teen. Aaron was asleep in the seat next to him, he hadn’t left Alexander’s side. Looking at Alexander, Lafayette could see why. His left arm was out of the covers. The wrist was wrapped in bandages. Lafayette had managed to see underneath them once and had been disgusted by the mottled, irritated, red and purple skin. He’d asked the nurse about it and she said they were rope burns. Lafayette wasn’t sure which was worse; the fact that Alexander had been tied down, or the fact that he’d fought back enough to shred the skin around his wrist.

The rest of Alexander’s arm had fared no better with ugly splotchy bruises across it, including a handprint mark on his lower forearm that was so obvious it hurt Lafayette just by looking at it. The arm was also so thin, everything about Alexander was so small as he lay in the bed and Lafayette knew it wasn’t just how the wires stuck out of him every which way.

Lafayette heard the door open and he turned to see John hovering in the doorway. Lafayette smiled weakly and John sat down next to him.

“Has he woken up yet?” John asked weakly.

“Last night for a bit. Only Aaron was still here.”

“But he was- he was okay?”

“Oui.”

“That’s- that’s good.” John reached towards Alexander but then paused and let his hand drop. “How did we not see this?”

“We did. We just did not stop it.”

“Why not?”

“John-”

“Look at him!”

“You think I have not? I could have stopped this months only merely by telling Washington. That first day he came in limping I- I could have-” Lafayette broke off and took in a deep breath. “They raped him, John. They- people hurt him for so long and I- I did nothing.”

“It wasn’t just-”

“But I knew! I knew Aaron was making him food! I knew that he returned a full lunchbox to Aaron!” Lafayette curled his hand into a fist. “I saw Aaron texting him, worrying over him, asking after him and I- I let it slide because I thought they could control it. And- and now-”

“Wait, Aaron knew?” John asked softly, glancing at Aaron’s sleeping form. Aaron’s head was tilted away from them as he slept.

“I- I do not know. Thomas- Thomas found out something he refuses to tell even me and it made Aaron move but- the night before he came here, Alexander appeared in my house with a broken and reset arm. Martha had done it. Aaron must have known.”

“Why didn’t he do anything?” John asked, glaring across at Aaron. Lafayette tried to think of an excuse but just as he couldn’t think of an excuse he’d used, he couldn’t think of one that Aaron could use.

Not one that justified anything when Alexander looked like he did.

“I have no idea.”

 

Alexander woke slowly, blinking away the sleep that had collected. He reached up to rub it away but then paused as his right arm protested. He wiped his eyes with his left arm and then looked around him. Aaron was in one chair, staring down at his phone. Washington was in another, dozing.

At the sight of Washington Alexander tensed. Aaron saw the movement and looked up.

“Alexander?”

“Have they found him?” Alexander asked quietly, not wanting to wake Washington. Aaron sighed and shook his head. “A-any of them?”

“Any?”

“Reynolds?”

“Who?”

Alexander stared at Aaron for several moments before he looked away.

“It’s not important.”

“Alexander-”

“It’s not.”

“Alexander, there are very few people who know what happened to you.”

“Would’ve though everyone at school would want to know about the worthless whore.” Alexander spat the words out. He went to cross his arms but paused as he realised his right was still encased in plaster. “And Thomas isn’t going to keep it a secret for long. You know how many enemies I have, how many people are gonna- are gonna enjoy watching me-” Alexander felt tears in his eyes and he brushed them away angrily. “They’re gonna enjoy watching me be put in my place.”

Aaron stared at Alexander for a moment before he looked away.

“Do you really think that’s what your step father did?”

“What?”

“Put you in your place? Did what anyone else would have? Did what you deserved?” Aaron’s hands were shaking slightly and Alexander stared at him in confusion.

“Yeah.”

“He’s in his forties, Alexander. You’re seventeen.”

“I asked for it.” Alexander admitted quietly.

“What?”

“I distracted him. I wore stuff that teased him. I- I forced his hand and-”

“Don’t you dare.” Aaron’s voice dropped and Alexander flinched back. “Don’t you dare give him excuses! He’s twice your age and your fucking step father, Alexander! You could walk around the house naked and it doesn’t mean he gets to do what he did! He raped you, Alexander! He raped you and filmed it and hit you so he could get off! None-” Aaron advanced a step and Alexander scrambled backwards. Aaron’s face turned to horror as Alexander hit the edge of the bed and fell out.

He landed on the floor with a sharp cry but it didn’t stop his panicked brain. He was there, the man who’d hurt him again and again and wouldn’t stop. Alexander had to escape. He tried to stand but immediately fell back to the floor. Instead he pushed himself backwards until he could feel two walls behind him. He then curled in on himself, his breathing too fast as he squeezed his eyes shut, praying that he wouldn’t be found, that he could hide just a bit longer.

Alexander could hear loud voices but he didn’t listen to them, just curled further into himself as tears began to fall down his face. His breath was too fast and his chest hurt.

Hands fell on him, pulling and tugging him. He let out a shriek that he wasn’t even sure was from his own throat. The hands tried to pull him towards them but he pushed back and thrashed as more hands landed on him. There was someone yelling somewhere but he couldn’t think about that.

Then there was a sharp prick in the side of his neck and the world faded away.

 

Aaron stood outside the room, staring at Alexander as he was carefully moved back to the bed. The doctors and nurses milled around him for another ten minutes, reattaching wires and tubes from the bloody mess Alexander had made of them.

Alexander himself looked so small, so small and almost pathetic, lying there. His face was stained with tear tracks and Aaron could still hear that heart piercing shriek he’d let out. It hadn’t even sounded human, it had sounded like an animal being led to slaughter.

And that had all happened because Aaron couldn’t keep control of his emotions.

“What happened in there?” Washington asked as he exited the room. There was anger coming off him in waves and Aaron had to catch himself to not kneel or beg forgiveness.

“I don’t know.”

“He is traumatised, Aaron! How can you not understand that?”

“I’m sorry, sir.”

“They’re going to take him for an x-ray. To make sure his ribs haven’t shifted again and put his lungs in danger.” Washington stared down at Aaron whose face was blank. “Are you listening to me, Aaron?”

“Yes, sir.”

“You could have killed him!”

Aaron felt the words like a physical blow and he nodded slowly. He couldn’t let it show on his face. It was one of the strongest reminders of his own abuse, no matter how much pain he was in he affixed a neutral expression to his face and just spoke less. It was what he had to do.

“I don’t know what’s come over you, Aaron. Do you really have no reaction to knowing your actions nearly killed your friend?”

“I-” the words stuck in Aaron’s throat and he swallowed slowly. “I apologise, sir.”

Washington stared down at him in a mix of disgust and shock.

“I suggest you go home.”

“But sir-”

“I suggest,” Washington’s tone carried a warning, a warning that Aaron couldn’t ignore. “That you get out of my sight.”

Aaron stared at Washington in fear before he turned on his heel and all but ran from the hospital.

 

Aaron had stopped running by the time he reached his home. He walked in the front door, feeling empty. Lafayette was there in a moment.

“Aaron? Are you okay?”

“I shouted at him.” Aaron admitted quietly.

“At who?”

“Alexander. And he thought I was going to hurt him.”

“What?”

Aaron looked up at Lafayette and for a moment his masks were gone, all that was left was a teenager terrified for his friend.

“I-” Aaron looked away and took in a deep breath. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Yes it does!” Lafayette growled. Aaron looked up at him in surprise. “You do not get to hurt my friend and walk away!”

“I- I-” Aaron glanced down. He did hurt Alexander. He had shouted at him, had caused Alexander to bolt in the only way he could. He deserved the punishment Lafayette would give him.

For a moment, his memory flashed back to the punishments his uncle would give, a beating that would leave him bloody, a caning that would mean he could barely stand, a whipping that meant he couldn’t lie down for a week. He’d rarely hit Aaron with his hands but had used every instrument he had at his disposal to hurt him instead. And at the end of each punishment he would make Aaron beg for it to stop and then admit his sins in some kind of bloody confessional.

Blood dripping down his neck as-

“I shouted at him. I scared him.” Aaron stared at Lafayette, face blank. “They’re worried his ribs might have shifted and compromised his air supply.”

“What?”

“I hurt Alexander.”

Lafayette’s face twisted in anger and he swung his fist into the side of Aaron’s face. It connected and threw Aaron to the ground where he groaned for a moment. He looked up at Lafayette who was still clenching and unclenching his fists. Aaron knew he wanted to throw another punch. He also knew that he deserved another one. After several long tense moments, Lafayette finally spoke.

“You are the worst, Burr.” Lafayette spat down. Aaron ducked his head and let out a long sigh. “Stay away from Alexander or I swear I will do much, much worse to you.” With that, Lafayette strode out of the house. Aaron stared after him before he let his eyes slide closed. He then dragged himself to his feet.

Lafayette could punch better than Aaron had been expecting. He was sure he’d have a dark bruise by tomorrow. And Aaron knew he deserved that, deserved so, so much more than that.

If he’d done something then Alexander wouldn’t be so hurt, wouldn’t be the terrified mess he was. Aaron could have stopped all of it.

But like usual he’d done nothing.

He knew he deserved worse than a black eye. He deserved to be the one in the hospital bed.

 

Alexander blinked his eyes open and stared around the now too familiar hospital room. Lafayette and Washington were in the seats, talking softly to each other. Alexander went to sit up and froze. He stared at his arm and felt something break in him as he saw the restraints tying him to the bed.

_Alexander thrashed wildly as Reynolds tried to pin him down._

_“No! Get off!” Alexander screamed. “I won’t! I don’t want to!”_

_“Shut up, you bastard!” Adams shouted, backhanding Alexander. Alexander was stunned for a moment but continued to fight._

_“I don’t want to! Get off me!”_

_“You need this money.” Adams growled._

_“Fuck you!”_

_At that, Adams punched Alexander in the face, causing his head to snap to the other side. The world started to spin and when it had finished Reynolds was done with what he was doing. Alexander tugged at the restraints futilely and then stared up at the two men. Adams grinned back down._

_“Not so tough now, are you?”_

_Alexander snarled at that and spat up, landing the spit right in the man’s face. Adams’ face morphed into pure, unconcealed anger and Alexander didn’t have time to prepare himself for the storm that he’d just enraged._

“Alexander? Alexander?”

Alexander could hear a voice through the fog in his mind but he couldn’t make sense of it. All he could think of were the restraints pinning him to the bed, preparing him like a lamb to the slaughter, like a whore to-

“Someone get these off him!” A man ordered. Alexander couldn’t move a muscle as his mind drifted, untethered from the pain the restraints always gave. There was a conversation around him but he couldn’t hear it, didn’t want to know what they were planning for him.

It was always better to just count the bruises afterwards.

Suddenly the restraints were off and Alexander sucked in a shaky breath. It felt like he’d slammed back into his body and everything was too bright for a second. Lafayette towered above him and Alexander forced himself to not run.

“You are crying, petit.” Lafayette whispered. He extended a hand but Alexander flinched back. Lafayette froze, eyes wide but Alexander just looked away. He quickly brushed away the tears.

“’S fine.” Alexander muttered. Lafayette stared at him.

“Alexander-”

“I’m fine.”

“You are a shit liar.”

“Well you’re shit at physics and I don’t bring that up, do I?” Alexander snapped. Lafayette’s expression grew stormy and Alexander looked away. “Sorry.”

“Petite lion,” Lafayette sighed. Alexander backing down that quickly wasn’t normal. Nothing about this was normal.

“When can I go home?” Alexander asked, voice thick with emotion.

“Tomorrow.” Washington said from the back of the room. Alexander looked up at him. “You’re coming home with me.”

“You shall be my brother.” Lafayette said softly. He gently touched Alexander’s hair and began to stroke it. Alexander clenched his fist tight. He hated that sensation, the knowledge that Lafayette was a second away from clenching, from pulling great clumps of hair out. But Alexander didn’t dare say anything. “I am excited.”

“M-me too.” Alexander lied. At that moment all he wanted was to fade into nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I'm currently writing chapter 27 of this fic. Whatever happens, this fic will still have a happy ending but I wanted a bit of help from my readers.  
> So basically there are two routes this story could go. One would be angsty and would be probably about 20k longer than the non-angsty one. I would need to add some new tags and it would make everyone more miserable for longer and would bring a large chunk of Aaron's backstory into the forefront of the story.  
> The non angsty version would still be sad but it would keep everyone together for longer and would be shorter and much sweeter.  
> Personally I would prefer to go the angsty route but I'm a bit iffy because it will be very sad and I know that not everyone will want that. So please tell me if you would rather me go angsty or non-angsty route by leaving a comment below


	9. Chapter 9

Alexander stared up at Washington’s house and let out a long sigh. It was enormous.

“What is it, petite?” Lafayette asked as he put a gentle hand on Alexander’s shoulder. Alexander jumped slightly and turned to stare at Lafayette.

“It’s a big house.”

“You have been here before.”

“I know.” Alexander muttered. “Just- just forgot.”

“I did not think there were cognitive side effects.” Lafayette frowned. Alexander shrugged.

“Not like that.”

“But-”

“I think it might be best to leave Alexander alone for a bit.” Washington stated. Alexander shifted and nodded. “Now then, the police aren’t allowing you to access your clothes from your house as it’s still an active crime scene.”

“S-since when?” Alexander looked up in surprise. Washington sighed.

“Since underage porn was found there.” Lafayette said softly. Washington nodded.

“O-oh.”

“The police have to go through everything with a fine toothed comb.” Washington added. “It shouldn’t take too much longer and until then, Aaron has given you some clothes he’s outgrown. If they don’t fit or they’re not enough then I can take you shopping and-”

“I have money of my own.” Alexander said quietly. He didn’t want to be a burden already. “I- I can pay my way. A bit anyway and- and for the rest of it then I can pay you back when I start working again cause I-I’ll have time now and-”

“You don’t need to pay for it, Alexander.” Washington stated. Alexander stared at him in confusion. “You’re here as my child. You will pay for the same amount that Lafayette pays for, nothing. Every week you’ll receive a small allowance to spend on whatever you want.”

Alexander stared at Washington for a moment before he glanced at Lafayette. He was expecting one of them to tell him it was a prank but neither of them did.

“Oh.” Alexander didn’t know what else to do so he just walked forwards and waited for Washington to unlock the door. He was then ushered upstairs to the guest room where he’d stayed that night. There was a small pile of clothes on his bed. Alexander took a step forwards and paused. “All for me?” Alexander asked quietly. Washington nodded and Alexander frowned. He’d always known that Washington was rich but the thought of this belonging to him made him feel sick.

“I’ll leave you to settle in.” Washington said as he turned and left. Lafayette left as well. On his way out he spotted Aaron peeking out from around his door. Lafayette’s face darkened at that. He stalked towards the door and threw it open. Aaron stared up at him, face blank.

“I told you to leave him alone.” Lafayette hissed.

“I-”

“I told you!” Lafayette growled. “If you do not then what happens is not my fault.”

Aaron stared up at him before he nodded slowly.

“What have I done to make you hate me?”

“You know exactly what.” With that, Lafayette turned on his heel and stalked off. Aaron watched him go before he grabbed a small bundle of clothes from his bed and hurried into Alexander’s room. Alexander whirled around to see him and Aaron braced himself for the disgust or fear to fill his face.

None of that happened. Instead, Alexander’s face widened in happiness.

“Aaron!” Alexander took a step forwards and then paused. “Is- is something wrong?”

“No. I just forgot some of your clothes.” Aaron extended his arms and Alexander took the pile. He frowned at the top item and pulled it off. It was a red hoodie that would more than likely dwarf him. Aaron bit his lip. “If you don’t like any of them, then-”

“This is your lucky hoodie.” Alexander muttered. Aaron shrugged. “You’re giving it to me?”

“It’s only lucky because of what you did.”

“I did what any good friend would do.” Alexander smiled at Aaron but Aaron’s expression slipped at that and he nodded slowly.

“Then I don’t know what kind of friend that makes me.”

“You got me out.”

“I came to you once with a broken arm. Once and- and you were-”

“It wasn’t just a broken arm though. It was the- the burns.”

Aaron snorted and pulled down his sleeve. Across his forearm were hundreds of small circular scars. The thought of them always made Alexander sick, the thought of Aaron just accepting his punishment as someone used him as a cigarette extinguisher, ignoring the whimpers he couldn’t have held back.

“These are nothing compared to what happened to you.”

“They used to be more impressive.”

“Alexander-”

“It’s in the past, okay?”

“But-”

“What happened to your face?”

“Walked into a cupboard.” Aaron lied. Alexander’s eyes narrowed.

“Yeah, and I fell down the stairs.”

“Look, it- it doesn’t matter. I-”

“Matters to me.”

“It shouldn’t.”

“You don’t get to tell me what matters.” Alexander stated. Aaron looked away, shame filling him.

“I’m sorry.”

“This hoodie means a lot to you. It matters.”

“Not anymore.” Aaron stared at it before he looked away. “I remember when you got it for me. I remember sneaking it past my uncle, wearing it when- when he’d beaten me and crying because it was the same colour.”

“I remember breaking into your house after and getting it back.” Alexander muttered, staring down at the worn hoodie. “Cause it was the only thing that would stop the nightmares.”

“Because it meant I had someone in my corner, someone who would fight for me.” Aaron sighed. “I don’t need anyone in my corner anymore. What I’ve done, I’ll accept. You need someone.”

“What you’ve done?”

“I know it’ll take a while but- but just know that I care about you. No matter what happens next.”

And with that horrendously cryptic message Aaron turned on his heel and fled the room. Alexander stared down at the hoodie for a moment before he tugged it on. He instantly felt protected and he smiled weakly.

He then moved onto the rest of the clothes Aaron had left. None of them held the same significance, nothing the boy owned held quite the same significance. Alexander froze as he felt something hard and cold. He slowly pulled it out and stared down at the lock in his hand. He glanced over to the door and then down at the lock.

Alexander smiled.

 

The next day at school, Aaron sat down next to Hercules and stared down at his lunch. Hercules shifted awkwardly and glanced at Lafayette who scowled at Aaron.

“Why did you not help him?”

“What?” Aaron looked up in surprise at the venom in Lafayette’s voice.

“You knew he was being hurt. Why did you not stop it?”

“I never knew he was being hurt like that.”

“Hurt like what?” John asked, glancing between Aaron and Lafayette. Lafayette shook his head.

“But you thought him being beaten was acceptable?”

“No. It’s-”

“You are not welcome here, Burr.” Lafayette spat out. Aaron stared at him for a moment and opened his mouth to say something. Before he could, Thomas sat down.

“Hey.” Thomas said softly. He looked tired. “Is- is Alexander any better?”

“He is home.” Lafayette said simply. Thomas smiled at that.

“Good. And the- the injuries?”

“They shall take longer to heal.”

“Of course. Um, has he talked to the police yet?”

“Non. They have arranged that today. It is why he is not in school.”

“Oh, well you can-” Thomas glanced at Aaron who was watching him with an almost nervous look. “I got what you asked so-” Thomas slide a piece of paper across the table. Aaron snatched it up before the other three could see. Lafayette’s eyes narrowed.

“What is that, Aaron?”

“It’s nothing.” Aaron forced a smile onto his face and Lafayette scowled. Thomas stared at him in confusion.

“What is it, Thomas?”

“It’s the uh- the URL of the website. The one with the videos of Alexander. Aaron said the police wanted it?”

“I have not heard of that.” Lafayette turned back to Aaron who sighed.

“Laf, it’s-”

“Why do you want that piece of paper?”

“It’s not important.”

“Why do you wish to see Alexander hurt?” Lafayette stood and Aaron’s head snapped upwards. He tensed, as if ready for a fight, but then forced himself to relax.

“It’s complicated.”

“No it’s fucking not.” Hercules growled out. Aaron glanced at him before he stared ahead again. “Why did you want that address?”

“I can’t tell you.”

“You’d better start talking.” John muttered. Aaron glanced around the table. Lafayette, Hercules and John were staring at him in obvious anger. Thomas was just watching him in confusion. He was outnumbered.

“I need to go.” Aaron stood and grabbed his lunchbox and bag. He strode out of the hall but then paused as he heard footsteps behind him. He turned back to see the three boys advancing. Something in their step made him falter and they caught up with him. Hercules grabbed his arm and steered him into an empty classroom.

“Why did you want that address?” Hercules asked, normally the voice of reason amongst the three. “Tell us and nothing needs to happen.”

Aaron opened his mouth and found nothing could come out. Hercules stared at him and disgust passed onto his face.

“You really don’t think he’s been through enough shit without people like you seeing it?”

Aaron looked down, just in time to not see the punch Lafayette threw.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So almost everyone decided that angst was better. I want to warn you that the angst up to about chapter 28 is normal angst. It's only after that it gets worse


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See, if I was smart and planned ahead then there would be something special for posting chapter 10 of 10 dollar  
> I'm not smart.  
> Sorry. All I'd really be able to do would be to upload chap 11 tomorrow so maybe that? idk

Alexander stared down at his hands as the two policemen sat in front of him. Washington stood in the corner of the room and overall, Alexander felt suffocated.

“Alexander?” The female policeman asked quietly.

“Y-yes?”

“We have some questions to ask and we need you to answer them as honestly as you can. Is that okay?”

“Sure.”

“Okay,” the woman glanced at her partner before she started speaking again. “When was the first time your stepfather hit you?”

“Um.” Alexander cast his memory back. “F-five years ago? When he was just my mama’s boyfriend. H-he was looking after me for the day and I w-wouldn’t shut up. He punched me and then later told me not to tell anyone.”

“Did he threaten you at that time?”

“He said he’d kill me. That- that he could set up an accident and- and my mama would be alone and sad and- and this was when she was healthy so I- I knew he was telling the truth.”

“Did you tell anyone?”

“My friend, Aaron Burr.”

“Did he do anything?”

“No.”

“Did your step father continue to hurt you?”

“Not often. I- I tried to stay out of his way most of the time. Sometimes it didn’t work but most of the time it was- it was okay. I knew he hit my mama but- she told me it was okay. She told me- she told me it was what she had to go through.” Alexander sniffed at that and Washington sighed.

“Are you aware that there were videos of you online, videos of an explicit nature?”

“Yeah.” Alexander stared down at his hands.

“Did you consent to be part of these?” The police man asked. Alexander glanced at him and bit his lip.

“Not really?”

“Can you elaborate, please.” The woman added.

“Well, I- my step father told me that I had to raise a thousand dollars in- in two weeks. That was- that was the night he first-” Alexander curled in on himself and pulled the sleeve of the red hoodie down. “He first fucked me.”

“Can you please give details about that.”

“Well I- I was just- just trying to get to sleep.” Alexander muttered. “It was late and I- I had stayed up cause he was out. I heard him come back in and decided to go to bed. When he got drunk it didn’t- didn’t always end well for me. But then he came into my room and- and I don’t know why.” Alexander felt tears appearing in his eyes and he wiped them away. “He held me down and- and fucked me. Soon as I could, I ran to the bathroom and threw up. Then he came in and said he’d kill my mama if I told anyone.”

“Did you tell anyone?”

“Not- not for a month and a half.”

Washington shifted in the corner and Alexander’s eyes snapped up to him. Washington looked furious and Alexander stared down again.

“So about this thousand dollars.”

“He- he told me I had to raise the money. I had two weeks. I- I had a job that paid minimum wage but I- I wouldn’t have time. The next time was a few days later. After I got back from my school exclusion. He- he got angry and told me that I could sleep with him and- and he’d pay me.”

“How much?” The woman asked gently. Alexander sniffed and felt a new wave of tears hitting him. “It’s important that we know everything, Alexander.”

“Ten dollars.” Alexander muttered.

“Excuse me?”

“He told me it was all I was worth. A- a ten dollar whore.” Alexander whispered. His shoulders sunk and he brought his sleeve up to wipe away his tears again.

“Do you want us to take a break, sweetie?” The woman asked. Alexander shook his head and sniffed. If he stopped now then he’d never be able to start again.

“He- I told him ten dollars wasn’t enough. Mathematically I just- I wasn’t going to get enough. So I- he told me there were always ways to make money for people like me. He left and I saw on his computer an advertisement. A- a website would give me five hundred just for one video. It was- I could do one, work in the library, get the ten dollars and my mama wouldn’t die.” Alexander pulled his legs onto the couch with him, putting his chin onto his knees.

“So it was your idea?”

“Yeah. I- I brought it up and we filmed the first two then. He kept me tied up between them. It hurt.” Alexander whispered the last sentence, as if he hadn’t even meant to say it. “I- I asked him to- to free me but- and he just- he just left me there as he went to eat.” Alexander sucked in a shuddering breath and shook his head.

“Alexander, I know this is very hard for you.” The woman smiled. “And you’re being very brave.”

“Can we stop? Please?” Alexander whispered. He didn’t expect to be heard or acknowledged but miraculously the woman nodded.

“Of course. We’ll arrange a time sometime later in the week to just go over the last few questions we have.”

“Do you have any leads?”

“No. But we’re going to get him and then he’s going to go to prison for a very, very long time.”

“Until after I’m eighteen?” Alexander asked softly. The woman smiled.

“Probably past he’s eighty.”

 

Aaron sat on the floor, breathing heavily. The three had left, left him on the floor of the classroom with a bloody nose and the ache of bruises across his body. He pulled the post it note out of his pocket and smiled.

It was worth it. It had to be.

With that information he could get proof.

Aaron hauled himself to his feet and bit back a groan as pain flared up across his entire body. He knew this pain, he’d known it for so many years before. He hadn’t known it to come from people he cared about though.

It had been a long time between him still caring about his uncle and him leaving. Escaping would be a better word honestly. He had felt so alone in that house, felt like no-one was there for him and he believed every lie the man had told him.

He had allowed his uncle to abuse him because he thought that was what he deserved. Even after he got out he was still messed up. He could remember the first few times he offered his forearm after an argument. Washington’s face had twisted into disgust and pity and all Aaron had thought was that he hadn’t offered the right punishment, that he deserved to be hurt more than that.

It had been Alexander who’d comforted him during those times. Alexander would track him down, hand him the hoodie and just talk, talk until his voice was nearly hoarse. Then Aaron would say something small, some explanation of why he thought he deserved to be punished and Alexander would just promise he wouldn’t be.

Aaron owed Alexander so much. Too much to ignore him now.

Aaron made his way out of the classroom and into the nurse’s office. He endured the questions, refusing to say who had hurt him. He didn’t think Washington would actually punish Lafayette and if the three told anyone what they thought was happening then Aaron would be in a lot more trouble. The mere thought of that made him shy away from telling anyone.

When Aaron arrived back at the house the police were just leaving. Aaron ducked his head on instinct and walked past Washington who frowned down at him.

“Where’s Alexander?”

“Who did this to you?”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Aaron-”

“Where is he?” Aaron stared up at Washington who was obviously conflicted. After a long moment he sighed.

“His room.”

“I gave him a lock.”

“You did what?”

Aaron tensed himself for the hit that would come.

“I gave him a lock and everything he needs to install it.”

“Why?” Washington was staring at him as if he was insane.

“He was abused. I want him to be able to know he’s safe somewhere.”

“That wasn’t your decision to make, Aaron.”

“I know.” Aaron took in a deep breath. “But any- any punishment goes to me, please. He-”

“I won’t hurt you.” Washington spoke over Aaron. Aaron’s face clearly told him that the teenager didn’t believe him. “I won’t hurt any of you. You should have told me this before you did it.”

“Yes, sir.”

Washington sighed and shook his head.

“You’re difficult to understand sometimes, Aaron.”

“I hope I always am.”

With that, Aaron turned away and slowly climbed the stairs. He came to a halt outside Alexander’s door and gently knocked.

“Who is it?” Alexander’s voice wavered as he called out.

“Aaron.”

Aaron waited until he heard the click of the lock being undone. Alexander stared up at him and Aaron smiled warmly down at him. Alexander threw his arms around him and Aaron let out a short cry. Alexander immediately pulled back and glared up at him.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” Aaron said quietly. Alexander scowled.

“You’re lying.”

“Alexander-”

“Someone hurt you!” Alexander stared up at the traces of blood on Aaron’s face.

“It doesn’t matter, Alexander.”

“It always matters when someone hurts you!”

“Alexander, I can’t stay. I- there’s something I need to do.”

Alexander visibly deflated at that but he nodded. Aaron paused for a moment and took in the sight of his friend. Colour was back in Alexander’s skin and the bruises were beginning to fade. The cuts around his wrists were closing and while they might scar, they wouldn’t be cuts for much longer. He was wearing the dark red hoodie and that tugged at something in Aaron, that he’d managed to do that for the boy at least.

“I swear that the person who’s hurting me doesn’t mean it.” Aaron said softly. “And- and it isn’t permanent. It’s just for a little bit. Just- just until I’ve fixed a mistake.”

“What’s the mistake?” Aaron stared at Alexander and Alexander looked away. “Oh.”

“I should never have let it get this far.”

“It’s not your fault, Aaron.” Alexander tugged the sleeves of the hoodie down. “I was the one who didn’t say anything.”

“And I knew about it and did nothing.”

“And blaming yourself is going to help? It won’t! Nothing will!” Alexander shouted. “He raped me, Aaron! I know that! He used me and he hit me and then he raped me for his own fucking enjoyment! He watched me cry and all he did was make sure he got it on that stupid fucking camera of his! He- he hurt me.” Alexander faltered for a moment and new tears sprang to his eyes. “I- I wish everyone would just- just accept that. He used me like the whore I am and threw me aside. You can’t save me Aaron, there’s nothing left to save.”

“Alexander-” Aaron whispered. Alexander shook his head.

“Go away, Aaron.”

“Please.”

“Go away!” Alexander screamed. Aaron turned on his heel and rushed out the door. Outside he saw Washington staring at the door, a confused look on his face.

“What was that about?” Washington asked.

“Nothing.”

“It looked like-”

“It was nothing important, sir.”

Washington frowned but nodded slowly. Aaron all but ran into his room. He paced for a few seconds, thinking about Alexander’s face as he screamed at him to get out, the fear and shame and anger mixing on his face in such a potent mix.

It infuriated Aaron that Alexander seemed to believe what he’d been told, all of the lies he’d been fed.

But Aaron shoved that from his head. He couldn’t change the past. He just had to change the future.

Aaron sat down at his laptop and typed in the URL. He glanced behind him and shifted uncomfortably as pictures flashed across the screen. The videos themselves were still up and Aaron glanced across them with a shudder. There were far, far too many. He could see pictures of Alexander in a few of the thumbnails and he scrolled past them immediately.

He took in a deep breath and typed in a few strokes. The code of the website flashed up and he bit down on his lower lip. He knew this was illegal, knew that hacking the website could bring so much trouble down on him.

But if he didn’t do anything then Alexander’s abuser could go free.

In the end, the choice was simple.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this fic is now officially one month old from when I started writing it and 70 000 words long. And boy. The angst. I think next update or maybe the update after I'll be able to tell you guys the tags that I'm going to update the work with because there are things later that can be triggering. For this chapter, just be careful of the small self harm scene

Reynolds ran a gentle hand down Alexander’s sides, boxing him in. Alexander stared up at him nervously, unsure of what the man was about to do. Reynolds moved forwards and straddled him. Alexander whined as his weight pressed down.

“Shh, shh.” Reynolds whispered almost lovingly. “Wouldn’t want to wake them up, would you?”

Alexander’s brow furrowed until he looked to the side. His heart skipped a beat as he saw Aaron on one side and Lafayette on the other. They both looked deep asleep but they were so close that if he even raised his voice they would wake.

“Please-” Alexander whispered. Reynolds smiled and just leant down to kiss Alexander again. Out of the corner of Alexander’s eyes he saw men emerging from the shadows. They wore masks that covered their face but Alexander remembered both of them, he’d had enough nightmares about them.

They approached his friends and began slowly undressing them.

“No!” Alexander pushed up and tried to get free but he couldn’t move. Aaron mumbled something in his sleep as his jeans were pulled down. “Please. Please don’t hurt them.” Alexander whispered.

Reynolds just grinned down at him.

“It’s far too late for that, bitch.”

Alexander closed his eyes as he heard a cry of pain from Aaron. Almost immediately, Lafayette began to scream as well. Alexander squeezed his eyes shut and began to sob.

 

Alexander jerked upright, breathing heavily. He looked around him and breathed out a sigh of relief as there was no-one in the room. More than that, there was no evidence anyone had ever been there. His clothes were still on and the door was still locked.

Alexander stood on shaky legs and hobbled over to the door to check that. He rattled the doorknob and smiled as it didn’t budge an inch. He sank down and leant his head back, making it impossible for anyone to enter.

This was the only way he could feel safe and how pathetic was that?

Alexander sighed and shivered. His eyes fell on the red hoodie and he crawled forwards to grab it and pull it on. He also grabbed his phone. He then lay back against the door and let his eyes slide closed.

 

Aaron rubbed at his eyes as he stared down at the laptop. He’d only managed to catch a few hours’ sleep before nightmares woke him. They were getting worse, he knew that. But he couldn’t find a way to shift them. He was hoping that atoning might at least lesson their strength even if it didn’t dismiss them entirely.

He glanced down at his phone and winced as another message came through. This one was from Lafayette, despite the teenager only being down the hall.

**From: Lafayette**

**You’re disgusting, Burr**

Aaron ignored it and stared at the computer screen in front of him. Better they think he was watching those videos, better they think he was some kind of twisted pervert than know that he was trying to track down a child molester.

Then they’d worry.

**From: Lafayette**

**I am ashamed to even think of you as my foster brother**

Aaron stared at that for a moment. It made sense, Lafayette was highly protective and Aaron had always known that this venture wouldn’t come without its pitfalls.

But that didn’t stop it from hurting.

 

Breakfast was awkward to say the least. Alexander just stared at his food and fiddled with the cuffs of his hoodie. Aaron watched him quietly but didn’t try to involve him in conversation. Lafayette glared at Aaron every time he so much as glanced at Alexander. Martha and Washington tried to keep up a normal conversation but it was impossible.

“When do I go back to school?” Alexander asked quietly. Washington glanced at him and sighed.

“Theoretically, you could go back today.”

“Wanna do that then.” Alexander glanced around the table as they all turned to him with worried faces.

“Are you sure you don’t want to give yourself more time to heal?” Martha asked gently. Alexander shook his head.

“It’d take too long and I- I need to keep on top of school.”

“Because you’re in so much danger of falling behind.” Aaron said drily with a smile. Alexander smiled back and shrugged. He opened his mouth to speak but before he could, Lafayette spoke.

“If he wants to go back who are you to tell him no?” Lafayette snapped, glaring at Aaron. The table turned to Lafayette in surprise at that and Aaron dropped his head. Alexander bit his lip and glanced between them.

“I’m just worried about him.”

“He does not need your worry.” Lafayette spat out. Aaron nodded and looked away. Alexander began to push his fingers back as far as they would stretch, feeling the nervous energy slowly dissipate.

“Lafayette, don’t speak to your brother like that.” Washington said warningly.

“He is not my brother!” Lafayette exclaimed, standing. Alexander flinched back at the sudden movement but only Aaron noticed. “He is nothing to me!”

“Where has this come from?” Washington stood as well and Alexander curled into himself as the two men towered over him.

“Ask him what he did!” Lafayette shouted. “Ask him- he is as bad as the men who hurt Alexander in the first place!”

“Lafayette, that is a very serious accusation.”

“He shouted and scared Alexander in the hospital!”

“Laf-” Alexander tried to speak but Lafayette spoke over him.

“He watched the videos!”

Silence fell over the table and Alexander turned to face Aaron, mouth hanging open. Aaron looked at him and shook his head.

“Alexander, that’s not true.”

“You liar!” Lafayette hissed out. “You asked Thomas for the website!”

“Aaron?” Alexander sounded lost.

“I swear to you-”

“Don’t lie!” Lafayette screamed. He strode to Aaron and grabbed his collar. Aaron didn’t put up a fight as Lafayette pushed him backwards. “You’re meant to be his friend!”

“I am! I just-”

“Was getting off that important to you?” Lafayette pushed Aaron again and Aaron stumbled back a few steps. “He saved your life and you repay him like this?” Lafayette grabbed for Aaron’s forearm and Aaron gasped at the memory of pain flooding his system as Lafayette’s hand clenched in a vice like grip over the burn scars. “You deserve everything that was done to you.”

“ENOUGH!” Washington shouted. Lafayette glanced at him and released Aaron’s arm, looking at him with disgust. “Lafayette, that is not acceptable.”

“I will not apologise.” Lafayette raised his chin and stared at Washington who scowled. “Not to someone like him.”

“Lafayette-” Washington said in a warning tone. Lafayette crossed his arms and scowled straight back. Washington sighed. “We’re going to talk about this tonight. For now, go and get ready. We’re leaving in five minutes.” Aaron moved towards the door but Washington blocked the way. “Aaron, stay.”

Aaron watched as Lafayette and Martha left the room. He wasn’t sure when Alexander had left but he couldn’t concentrate on that, too focused on the terror building in his throat.

“Sir?” Aaron asked, looking up. Washington scowled down and Aaron had to dig his nails into the soft skin of his palm to not bolt.

“Did you ask for that website?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Did you watch the videos?”

“No, sir.”

Washington stared at him for a moment before he sighed and looked away.

“You’ve always been a good liar, Aaron.”

“I’m not lying now.”

“Then why did you want the website?”

Aaron closed his mouth and just stared up. Washington scowled.

“Until you can give me a reason then I cannot understand. You’ve been acting strange for the last few days. More than that, you knew Alexander was being abused five years ago? And you did nothing?”

“I thought that would be better.”

“And now Alexander is traumatised.” Washington sighed. “I don’t have a punishment that can fit you watching people rape your friend, Aaron. This isn’t something I can just ground you over. This isn’t something I can just cut off your allowance for. There is no punishment I know of. But if I find any evidence then I will find a punishment suitable.”

Aaron stared at Washington for a long moment before he nodded.

 

Alexander slammed into his room and stared around. He stared down at the hoodie he was wearing and he pulled it off with shaking hands. Aaron had seen him. Aaron had seen him begging and crying. Alexander sank to the floor and raised his shaking hands over his head.

Aaron had seen him be fucked, seen him being the worthless whore he knew he was. He’d seen Alexander put in his place.

What if that was what Aaron wanted to do? What if he wanted to hurt Alexander, hurt Alexander again and again and make him beg for mercy until Alexander screamed to be fucked?

The what-ifs flew through Alexander’s head and he whined. He’d trusted Aaron, trusted Aaron above anyone else. But even Aaron had found out that Alexander was nothing. Not just nothing.

Alexander wiped the tears away from his eyes.

Aaron had worked out just what Alexander’s step father had worked out, that he was just something to be used and thrown aside. Alexander didn’t know how long it would be until the rest of his friends worked out the same thing.

“Alexander?” Lafayette knocked on the door and Alexander whimpered. “Alexander, can I come in?”

“N-no.” Alexander whispered. Lafayette pushed the door open and sighed as he saw Alexander. He slowly approached the teenager and sank down to a crouch.

“Petit, it will be okay, I promise.”

“He was my friend.” Alexander whispered. Lafayette sighed.

“Was he? You butted heads so often.”

“He was there for me and-”

“And when he found out you were being hurt he did nothing. Is that something a real friend would do?”

“I don’t know.” Alexander wiped his nose on his sleeve and shivered slightly. The room was cold without the warmth of the hoodie around him. “He worked it out.”

“Worked it out?”

“Worked out that I-I’m just a stupid whore. I’m not worth- I’m not worth anything!”

“Non, non.”

“It’s what he worked out as well.” Alexander’s voice dropped at that. “I didn’t- I didn’t even know but I was- I was tempting him and-” Alexander curled in on himself and shook his head. “What if I’m giving those messages to Aaron? What if- what if he-”

“He will not.” Lafayette growled out. “If he even touches you then I will murder him, I swear.”

“But-” Alexander

“I will protect you, petit. I have not done well enough in the past but I will not allow him to touch you. I swear. If it bothers you still then we can attempt to get him moved to another house.”

“Y-you’d do that? For me?”

“He is nothing to me. Not after what he’s done.”

“Thank you.” Alexander whispered. Lafayette smiled.

“Anything for you, petit.”

“Were you the person that hit him?” Alexander asked quietly. Lafayette stared at him and slowly nodded. Alexander looked away at the conflicting emotions in his stomach.

 

Aaron slammed into his room and breathed out. His breath hitched on the inhale and he was embarrassed as tears began to streak down his face. He shouldn’t be crying, not after Alexander had looked like that.

Aaron stumbled over to his desk and threw it open. He grabbed out the lighter and stared down at it. Lafayette’s words flew through his head over and over, Washington’s words, Alexander’s face. He was a freak, he saw his best friend beaten and raped because he thought he could do better than the police. Lafayette thought what had been done to him was justified, Washington knew he needed a punishment worse than what the man was willing to dish out.

Alexander was scared of him

The lighter dipped down as a flame flickered to life on top of it. Aaron stared numbly as the fire licked at his skin. It hurt so badly but this was a punishment he knew, a punishment he knew he deserved.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So good news everyone, I've figured out that it'll probably be about chapter 39 when everyone gets happy. Uhh mostly happy at least

Alexander sat in the car, curled in on himself. He was sat in front next to Washington. Aaron and Lafayette were in the back and the car was silent. Alexander chewed on his lower lip. There were already several areas he couldn’t put too much pressure on in case they started bleeding again but that didn’t deter him as much as it should have.

“Does anyone know?” Alexander said softly. All three turned to stare at him before Washington answered.

“Your teachers know that you’ve been moved from your house to my home. They know you were suffering from abuse but the specifics will not be given out until you give permission. As for the student body, we’ve tried our hardest to keep it contained. Thomas knows everything, I believe James does as well but other than them and your friends then the students are in the dark.”

“Will it- will it stay like that?”

“I hope so. If anyone tries to interfere with you then come to me and I’ll find a suitable punishment.”

Aaron shifted at that and Lafayette shot him a look. Aaron pulled his left arm closer to his body but other than that, did nothing. Lafayette scoffed and looked away, disgust written across his face.

They rolled up to the school and the three teenagers stepped out as Washington prepared to park. Aaron turned to Alexander immediately.

“Did you remember your-”

“I told you not to talk to him.” Lafayette snarled. He stepped between the two and Aaron frowned.

“Laf-”

“No. You lost all right to talk when you watched those videos! Do what you’re good at, Burr. Talk less.”

Aaron glanced at Alexander as if begging for him to say something. Alexander looked down and avoided the gaze. Aaron let out a sigh and nodded.

“If that’s what Alexander wants.”

“It is what’s right.”

Alexander stared as Aaron turned on his heel and walked off. There was a defeated slump to his shoulders and a part of Alexander wanted to go after him, wanted to comfort him. Lafayette’s hand landed on Alexander shoulder and he jumped.

“It is okay, petit. He will not hurt you anymore. I swear.”

Alexander couldn’t think of a response, too focused on the weight of Lafayette’s hand. It was distracting in the worst way.

 

Aaron stared around the cafeteria and sighed. He didn’t know where he should sit. He’d sat with Lafayette, Hercules, John and Alexander for years. Before that he’d sat alone, normally not even eating as he hadn’t earned it the previous night.

Aaron knew there was no way in hell Lafayette was going to let him sit with him. He looked ready to rip Aaron’s head off every time he so much as glanced at Alexander. Aaron knew better than most when not to instigate more pain than was needed.

Hercules glanced up from where he was talking to Alexander and his eyes fell on Aaron. Instantly his smile was gone and he nudged Lafayette lightly. Lafayette looked over to Aaron and scowled. He sat up straighter which made John and Alexander turn and stare.

The moment Alexander saw Aaron he looked away and sank down in his seat. He fiddled with the cuffs of his jumper and looked so fragile that all Aaron wanted to do was embrace him, hold him tight against everyone who might try to hurt him.

John, on the other hand, looked murderous. He muttered something to Alexander before standing. Alexander grabbed for his arm but John shook his off and stalked towards Aaron. Aaron looked away but it was too late.

“You fucking pervert!” John shouted. Aaron winced as the cafeteria fell silent and turned to stare at them.

“John, let’s just-”

“No! You-”

“If not for me then for him.” Aaron hissed out. John glared at him at that.

“You think you get to say what’s good for Alexander after what you did?” John stepped forwards again, crowding Aaron. Aaron looked away and John’s hands balled into fists at his side.

“John, please-”

The rest of his sentence was cut off as John punched him.

Aaron stumbled back several paces and raised a shaking hand to his cheek. He stared at John in shock. He hadn’t thought they’d do this more than once, he thought they’d got it out of their system the previous day.

“How long have you been pulling this kind of shit?” John shouted. “How long have you been a spineless little coward?” John took another step forwards and Aaron said nothing. “Answer me!”

Aaron stared at him as the words caught in his throat and breathing became almost impossible. John’s face twisted in fury and he pulled his arm back. Aaron flinched back, expecting a hit that never came.

“Enough!”

Aaron opened his eyes in surprise at the new voice. Thomas was stood in front of him, between him and John. The cafeteria began to whisper as the two stood there, locked in eye contact.

“You don’t get what he did, Thomas. He-”

“It doesn’t matter.” Thomas growled out. “Not here, John.”

“But-”

“Not here.” Thomas commanded. John glanced behind him and saw the mass of students staring at him. “For his sake, if nothing else.” John slowly nodded at that before he turned back to Aaron.

“You hurt him again, you’re dead.” With that, John stalked back to his table. Aaron watched him go before Thomas turned to him.

“Come on.” Thomas led Aaron into the quiet hallway before he spoke. “Are you okay?” Thomas asked. Aaron nodded. He could feel blood slowly dribbling from his nose but he figured Thomas already knew that. “Wanna tell me what that was about?”

“Ask them.” Aaron said, numbly.

“I already asked you.”

“I asked for the address. I knew. I knew five years ago that his step father was hitting him. I knew and I didn’t do anything.”

“They didn’t either.”

“Alexander texted me saying he was scared, saying that he couldn’t get out because his mother was in danger.” Aaron’s voice was dull and something about it scared Thomas. “I reset his arm instead of making him tell me what was happening. I didn’t force him to go to Washington. I saw everything and I did nothing.” Aaron looked away. “I never do anything.”

“Aaron-”

“He saved me, you know.” Aaron said softly. “Two years ago I was in an abusive house. My uncle beat me every night. He used me as a cigarette extinguisher. He starved me. He made me silent. He wrapped wire around my neck and-” Aaron paused at that and raised his hand to his neck. Thomas could just about make out a small white circle-shape on the side of his neck, it looked burned into his skin.

“It’s okay. You’re safe.”

“Because of Alexander. Alexander found out and from that moment on he was in my corner. No matter what happened, Alexander was there. When my uncle burned all my clothes Alexander found similar clothes online and gave them to me as a Christmas present and forced all his friends to do the same.”

“I didn’t know that.” Thomas admitted.

“When I came in with bruises he helped me cover them. When I came in with a broken arm he helped set it. When I came in and told him that my uncle had tried to kill me he got me out. I just-” Aaron broke off and looked away, tears building in his eyes. “I just wanted to help him.”

“It’s Hamilton, Aaron. He’s impossible to help.”

“But-”

“Look, him doing all that for you in the past doesn’t mean you still owe him some kind of debt. He shouldn’t have waited long enough for your uncle to try to kill you. He should have done something sooner. But he knew that you’re stubborn. And we both know that there is no-one as stubborn as Alexander fucking Hamilton.”

“But-”

“No buts. I don’t care what they think you did, I don’t believe it. You obviously care about him.”

“I shouted at him in the hospital. He fell out of bed and nearly punctured his lung again.”

“Why did you shout?”

“He was- he was talking about how his step-father- how it was Alexander’s fault that he was raped. It was-” Aaron shook his head.

“I don’t blame you for shouting. I think anyone would have.”

“Lafayette does. Washington does.”

“You don’t stand up for yourself. You never do.”

“I- I shouldn’t. Not now.”

“You have to eventually.”

Aaron shrugged.

“I don’t see why.”

 

Alexander stared down at the sandwich in front of him. Martha had made up their lunches the day before. He knew that because it was peanut butter.

Aaron didn’t give him peanut butter.

“Is everything okay, petit?”

“Y-yeah.” Alexander put the sandwich back down and moved onto the other pieces in the lunch box. Nothing grabbed his attention but he knew he had to eat something. The hunger in his stomach was so bad and it was just getting worse.

“You know, he can’t hurt you.” Hercules added quietly. Alexander nodded.

“How many people do you reckon know about it now?” Alexander said quietly.

“What?”

“You- you said my name. And- and that Aaron was a pervert. What if-” Alexander wiped away tears he hadn’t even been aware were there. “What if they figure it out?”

“No-one will figure it out. I promise.” John reached out a hand and Alexander flinched back. John paused. “I- I’m sorry. I didn’t even think about it. I just thought that- that he needed to pay.”

“I don’t want it to happen at school.” Alexander said softly. “I don’t want it to happen. I just- I just want to ignore it, okay?”

“Is that really the best plan?” Hercules asked gently.

“I don’t know. But it’s the one I want. Will- will you guys go along with it?”

“Yeah.”

“Oui.”

“Fine.” John crossed his arms. “But I don’t like it.”

 

“Do you want to come and eat with us?” Thomas offered after a long moment. Aaron smiled, a tired smile full of defeat.

“No. That won’t help anyone.”

“If any of Alexander’s friends have a problem with you then-”

“I think you’re going to be too late.” Aaron inclined his head down the hall and Thomas scowled as he saw John and Hercules approaching. Thomas took a step forwards but before he could do anything else, Aaron caught his arm.

“Aaron?”

“Don’t. Go back to James.”

“What? Are you insane?”

“It’s what I deserve.” Aaron said softly.

“You sound like Alexander.”

“It’s better this way.”

“This is insane! You can’t just roll over and accept a beating like some kind of-”

“I’ve done it for a long time. Now go. You could stop them in public but not here.”

Thomas scowled but slowly turned on his heel. He paused in front of John and Hercules, forcing them to stop as well. Hercules crossed his arms and Thomas was suddenly reminded just how big the teenager was.

“Get out the way, Jefferson.” Hercules commanded. Thomas looked between them and shook his head.

“How long has he been friends with Alexander? Do you really not think there’s a different explanation as to why he wanted that website?”

“Has he given you one?” John asked. Thomas paused. “He hasn’t given anyone a reason. Not even Alexander. There isn’t a reason to give. He’s a pervert who decided to get off on the rape of my best friend. I’m not going to let that stand.”

Thomas scowled and opened his mouth to speak but Hercules interrupted.

“Get out of here, Thomas. Get out and we won’t have to do anything we’ll regret.”

Thomas looked away before he slowly walked off. Aaron looked straight ahead as John and Hercules advanced.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick warning for some pretty graphic violence in this chapter (explaining how Aaron got the circular scar on his neck that's been mentioned) if you don't want to read it then that's fine, it doesn't impact much you can't guess. It's all in the italicised section

Aaron decided to wait for Washington to be done that night instead of taking the bus home just after school. That way it was virtually impossible for him to see Alexander. It also gave him an hour and a half where he didn’t have to think, where he could just close his eyes and not exist.

“Aaron?” Washington’s voice jostled Aaron out of his peace. He looked up and saw Washington stood there. Aaron stood with a smile. “What happened to you?”

“What?”

“You have a black eye.” Washington reached forwards and Aaron looked away. “Have you been in a fight?”

“I wouldn’t call it a fight.”

“Aaron, is someone bullying you?”

“No.”

“Assaulting you?”

“No.”

“Then what?”

“I wasn’t looking where I was going and I walked into a door.” Aaron stared at Washington with just the slightest hint of rebellion in his eyes.

“If someone is hurting you-”

“Don’t even bother.” Aaron turned away.

“Aaron, I am talking to you.” The anger in Washington’s voice was enough to make Aaron freeze in place. He glanced up before staring down at his hands. Washington paused as he seemed to realise what he’d done.

“I don’t want to tell you their names.” Aaron admitted quietly.

“There was more than one of them?”

“They won’t hurt anyone else. Just me.”

“A personal vendetta?”

Aaron smiled weakly at that.

“Something like that.”

 

Alexander picked at the edges of his bandages nervously. The thought of Aaron watching those videos had shaken him to the core. He shuffled over to his phone and sent off a quick text to Thomas.

**To: Jefferson**

**How many of the videos did you see?**

Alexander paused and sent it. He hated that he wanted to know but he needed to know. The response came after a few long moments.

**From: Jefferson**

**You don’t want to know**

**To: Jefferson**

**Please**

**From: Jefferson**

**I saw all of the first one**

**To: Jefferson**

**First one?**

**From: Jefferson**

**The one with you wearing a mask**

**To: Jefferson**

**Why?**

**From: Jefferson**

**Because I watch porn**

**To: Jefferson**

**How did you work out it was me?**

**From: Jefferson**

**You said something at the beginning. I didn’t catch all of it but it reminded me of you**

**To: Jefferson**

**And you carried on watching?**

**From: Jefferson**

**As soon as I finished it another one was uploaded by the same person. I decided to watch it. I didn’t believe it was you at first but when I realised, I stopped. I swear**

**To: Jefferson**

**Has James told anyone?**

**From: Jefferson**

**He doesn’t know**

**To: Jefferson**

**What?**

**From: Jefferson**

**I wasn’t planning on confronting you and you telling me that. I had other plans so I decided to hold off on telling him**

**To: Jefferson**

**Other plans?**

**From: Jefferson**

**It doesn’t matter**

**To: Jefferson**

**Why are they mad at Aaron?**

**From: Jefferson**

**Because they think he’s as bad as your step father**

**To: Jefferson**

**Why aren’t you mad?**

**From: Jefferson**

**I saw what your step father did to you. I saw the videos and I saw you in that box. Aaron was desperate when he got you out. I don’t know what he’s doing but I don’t think he’d ever want to hurt you**

**To: Jefferson**

**But he hasn’t given me a reason**

**From: Jefferson**

**I have no idea why**

 

Aaron skulked in the corner of the kitchen. Martha glanced at him and frowned.

“What happened to your face, Aaron?”

Lafayette stood in the other corner and crossed his arms. He felt a pang of guilt but then crushed it.

“It’s nothing.” Aaron muttered. Martha frowned. “You’re making lunches?”

“Yes. Do you want to help?”

Aaron nodded silently and stepped forwards. Martha motioned to where the carrots were sat and he began to wash them. Lafayette stared at him for a long moment before he began to speak.

“Did Alexander do okay with the police?” Aaron asked softly.

“As well as can be expected.” Martha said softly. She reached for the bread and Aaron watched her carefully. “He’s got a long way to go before he’ll be okay with anything.”

“Yeah.” Aaron muttered before he reached for the peeler.

“Why do you even pretend to care?” Lafayette snapped out. Aaron looked down and didn’t say a word. “I asked you something!”

“Laf, don’t talk to him like that.”

“Why not?”

“I care about Alexander.” Aaron said quietly. “I really do.”

“You have a funny way of showing it. You have not even apologised for it!” Lafayette scowled as Aaron didn’t say anything in response. Instead he was frowning at the sandwiches Martha was making. “Are you listening?”

“Why are you making three peanut butter sandwiches?” Aaron asked quietly. Martha glanced at him and frowned.

“Do you want something different?”

“How- how long have you been feeding him peanut butter?”

“Since he arrived here.”

Aaron stared at the sandwich before he looked back to Lafayette who was watching him in confusion.

“You talk so much about how bad of a friend I am.”

“You-”

“And you forget he’s allergic to peanuts.”

Lafayette paused and his eyes widened. Martha gasped and stared at Lafayette. Aaron stepped forwards and gently pushed her aside. He went into the fridge and pulled out the chicken, lettuce and mayonnaise. He then got started on the sandwich.

“Aaron-” Lafayette broke off. “Knowing that does not make you a better friend.”

“But I am.” Aaron growled out. He clenched the knife in his hands, ignoring how it shook. “Because at least I’m fucking doing something!”

“What?”

“Nothing.” Aaron turned back to the sandwich. Lafayette scowled and stepped forwards.

“You think that is something good? Watching them for any reason will help? You are wrong!”

“You don’t have a clue!” Aaron shouted, turning on his heel. “You- you have no idea what it was like finding him! He was in a box, Laf! And- Thomas told me he couldn’t be in there because it was too small but I knew he was because I knew I used to fit in a box that small! I knew because I’ve been there!”

“So you decide to get off to him?”

“He was grey!” Aaron screamed. Lafayette’s eyes widened in surprise. “His skin was grey because of the blood loss and it’s my fucking fault! All of it’s my fucking fault because I didn’t notice it sooner! He was beaten and whipped and raped because of me! I’m the reason those videos exist so you can do whatever you want to me, I’m thinking of worse things! I don’t care how many times Herc or John hit me because I _know_ it won’t be enough!”

Lafayette’s eyes widened at that and Aaron sucked in a shuddering breath.

“Aaron-”

“He saved my life and I couldn’t even save him without Thomas. He saved my-” Aaron broke off and shook his head. “I know I’m whatever you want to call me.”

Aaron turned to leave and paused as he saw Alexander in the doorway. Alexander was staring at him with his mouth open. Aaron looked away.

“I’m sorry.” Aaron whispered. Alexander went to say something but Aaron pushed past him before he could. Aaron hurried up the stairs and slammed into his room.

He grabbed the lighter and brought it against his skin, burning a long trail. He whimpered as he smelt the burning skin and his stomach flipped as a memory shoved itself to the forefront of his thoughts.

_Aaron knelt in front of his uncle, head bowed and hands trembling. He wasn’t even sure what he’d done this time._

_“Take your shirt off.” The man ordered. Aaron slowly pulled it off and folded it, placing it gently next to him. “If you make a sound then I will make this ten times worse for you, do you understand?” Aaron didn’t answer, too busy trembling. He was rewarded with a slap across his face that nearly sent him to the ground. “Do you understand?”_

_“Yes, sir.” Aaron whispered. His uncle nodded slowly._

_“You lied to me today. You told me you’d finished your homework. I don’t appreciate it when you lie to me, Aaron.”_

_“I didn’t-”_

_This time, Aaron’s balance wasn’t good enough to keep him on his knees and he slammed into the floor with a whimper._

_“Kneel.” His uncle commanded, almost bored. Aaron righted himself and stared down at his hands crossed in his lap. He felt a heavy hand on his head and flinched as his hair was used to drag him closer. He hated how long his hair was but his uncle didn’t allow him to cut it._

_Aaron whimpered as he was dragged into the kitchen but his uncle didn’t pause. He opened the oven and Aaron stared inside. There were several circular pieces of metal inside, glowing red with how hot they were. Aaron’s breathing sped up and he felt another slap._

_“You have a choice now, Aaron.” His uncle whispered. “Either you can hold one of these in your mouth for five minutes or all ten will lie on your chest for three minutes.”_

_Aaron shook his head in pure disbelief. If he put one of those in his mouth he’d never be able to keep it there for five minutes but on the other hand, ten new scars would be difficult to cover and that wasn’t even considering the pain._

_Aaron didn’t want to consider the pain._

_“Talk.” His uncle commanded._

_“My chest.” Aaron whispered, tears spilling down his cheek. His uncle huffed and then gestured to the kitchen table._

_“Lie down.”_

_Aaron slowly walked to the table and lay down on top of it. He screwed his eyes shut and tried to ignore the clanking of metal. His uncle approached with the tray in his hand and oven gloves protecting him. He placed the tray on the table and picked up one of the metal pieces. Closer, Aaron could see that they were coins._

_The first one was gently placed at the base of his sternum and Aaron couldn’t help the scream that tore from his lips. He raised his arms to get it off but before he could, his uncle pinned his arms to his sides._

_“Don’t you dare.”_

_“Please, please!” Aaron whimpered. “Get it off, please!” Aaron screamed as his uncle placed another one just below it. The smell of burning flesh hit the air and Aaron’s screams increased in volume. His uncle pulled back for a moment and Aaron took the opportunity to grab the two coins and fling them across the room._

_His uncle punched him across the face for that and Aaron whimpered._

_“Control yourself!”_

_“I’m sorry.” Aaron whispered. His uncle glared before he strode out of the room. Aaron sobbed to himself at the pain on his chest and fingers. When his uncle came back, it was with thick ropes. Aaron tried to move away, tried to beg but nothing stopped the man from tying him to the table, the ropes biting in harshly._

_“Now you’re holding eight for five minutes.” The man spat out. “Is that any better?”_

_“I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Aaron whimpered. His uncle’s lip curled in disgust and he just placed another coin on Aaron’s body, just in the gap underneath his last rib. The next went over his belly button and Aaron screamed at the sensation of the rawer skin being burned. The next two went to each of his shoulders, burning through just over the bone and causing Aaron to beg. The next two went to his sides, balancing precariously._

_The next one was laid almost reverentially in his clavicle. Aaron screamed at that, knowing he wouldn’t be able to hide it, knowing that the burn would be visible to anyone._

_The last one was a dollar. Aaron noted that absently as his uncle toyed with it as he got his phone out._

_“Five minutes. That is what I promised.” With that, he pressed the last, and largest, coin to the side of Aaron’s neck, pressing it further and further in. Aaron tried to break free but there was nothing he could do. He could feel the coins slowly burning their way down his skin and every so often his uncle would press harder, eliciting a hoarse cry from Aaron._

_When the timer finally went off Aaron’s face was wet with tears and his breathing was harsh from the pain. His uncle stared down at him with disgust evident in his eyes._

_“Do you understand why you were punished, Aaron?”_

_“I lied!” Aaron cried out. His uncle nodded._

_“And will you do that again?”_

_“N-no. I swear!”_

_“I don’t believe you.”_

_“Please, sir!”_

_“Open your mouth.”_

_Aaron followed the command without a second thought and screamed as the coin his uncle had been holding was placed on his tongue. He tried to snap his mouth shut but thick fingers yanked his jaw open and he heard his tongue burning._

_“I need to make sure you won’t ever forget this punishment.” His uncle whispered above him. Aaron wailed in response. “I need to make sure you understand the consequences of your actions.”_

“W-what are you doing?”

Aaron’s head snapped up and he froze as he saw Alexander in the doorway. He stared down at his arm and felt disgust rise in him as he saw that his lighter had burned through the skin and blisters were appearing across his forearm. He dropped the lighter and stumbled back. Alexander stepped forwards and grabbed his forearm. He stared down at the recent burns before he looked back up at Aaron.

“I’m sorry.” Aaron whispered. Alexander shook his head. “I’m sorry for not getting you the help you needed. I’m sorry for not being brave enough to. I’m sorry for not being the friend you deserve. I’m sorry that I never will be. I’m sorry that I’m still s-so scared. I’m sorry that-”

“You don’t need to be sorry.” Alexander said. “You just- you just have to say why.”

“I can track his laptop.” Aaron admitted. Alexander froze. “He took it with him. It’s how he uploaded the videos. The website keeps track of who uploads what and if- if I can just have a bit more time then I can do it.”

“You can find him?”

“I can bring him to justice.”

Alexander stared down at Aaron’s arm and, for a reason he couldn’t quite explain, burst into tears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I've finished writing this fic. Before any of you get happy at that there is a caveat; I did not reach the happy ending. I reached a point which I just couldn't continue in a single fic. So there will be a sequel to this fic. This fic will end incredibly angsty but the sequel will end happily (also I didn't want another 100k fic on my account. This fic ends up at 76k rn)  
> Tags I am removing:  
> Angst with a Happy ending, Bad decisions, Herc and James are twins, Misunderstandings   
> Tags I am adding:  
> Force-feeding, Suicide attempt, Teen pregnancy, dehumanization  
> If any of these might trigger you then you can message me here by leaving a comment or you can message me on tumblr where I have the same name (blazingstarininkyblackness)


	14. Chapter 14

Lafayette tentatively knocked on Aaron’s door. There was no answer. He pushed the door open and paused as he saw Alexander clutching to Aaron for dear life as both of them sobbed. Lafayette couldn’t help the wave of guilt that hit him and he paused.

Aaron scrambled backwards and raised his arms in a placating gesture. Lafayette froze as he saw burns covering his arm. He strode forwards and Aaron flinched back.

“Aaron-”

“Don’t hurt him.” Alexander commanded shakily. Lafayette stumbled and stared as Alexander clenched and unclenched his fist. “H-he told me his reason. He told me why.”

“Why?”

“I won’t tell you.”

“But-”

“N-no!” Alexander crossed his arms and scowled. “I- I get to say that, remember? I get to say no and people have to listen!”

Lafayette glanced at Aaron before he slowly nodded.

“If Aaron wants to say then he gets to. Until then you have to leave him alone.”

“I am not happy with this.” Lafayette stated.

“I don’t care. You- you have to. You say you should have listened before and so listen now. Leave him alone.”

Lafayette stared at Aaron, at how small he looked. His eyes were glazed over and there was no way of ignoring the deep burn he’d just made into his own forearm. The very thought made Lafayette sick, that he had been in some, far too large, part to blame. As Aaron stood there, he didn’t look like the names Lafayette had thrown at him. He just looked like a lonely child who didn’t expect anyone to come to his rescue.

“For you.” Lafayette acquiesced. Alexander nodded.

“Thank you.”

“Is he okay?”

“No.” Alexander muttered. He went over to Aaron and gently pulled his burned arm away from his body. “Aaron, listen to me. It’s okay.” Aaron didn’t seem to hear him as he slowly rolled down his sleeve and held his arm out. “Laf, get the red hoodie from my room.”

Lafayette nodded and left the room. Alexander sat down next to Aaron and began to gently rub circles into his hand.

“I should have believed you. I’m sorry that I didn’t.” Alexander muttered. Aaron didn’t say a word, staring straight ahead, as if lost in some kind of memory. “I don’t blame you for not getting me out. I don’t blame you for not saving me. It wasn’t your job. I know you have problems taking the initiative and- and if I had told you more I was worried you’d be hurt. I didn’t realise how much it hurt you not knowing.”

Lafayette burst back into the room and Alexander snapped his head up. Lafayette paused and extended the hoodie. Alexander took it and offered it gently to Aaron. Aaron stared down at it and frowned.

“It’s your hoodie.” Alexander explained in a whisper. Aaron reached for it with the arm he wasn’t offering and rubbed it against his face, inhaling Alexander’s smell. He blinked in confusion as the smell of burning was driven away.

“Alexander?”

“I’m here.” Alexander whispered. Aaron stared at him before he realised he was offering his arm. He pulled it back suddenly. “We need to get that looked at, Aaron.”

“I’ve had worse.” Aaron muttered. Alexander glanced at the white circle on the side of his neck.

“Doesn’t matter. You still need help.”

“I don’t want them to be mad.”

“They won’t be.” Alexander promised. Aaron slowly nodded and Alexander rose to his feet. His ribs cried out in protest but he didn’t let it show on his face. He offered a hand down for Aaron who grasped it and stood slowly. When Aaron looked at Lafayette he quickly looked away.

“Do you have a first aid kit in your room?” Aaron asked Alexander. Alexander nodded and opened his mouth but Lafayette spoke first.

“That is not a good idea. You should have it properly dressed. If you refuse a hospital then at least accept Martha’s help.”

“If I tell them then they’ll take the lighter away.” Aaron whispered. Alexander frowned.

“Give it to me and I’ll hide it.”

“I need it.” Aaron muttered.

“Why?”

“For my punishments.”

“You don’t need to be punished though.” Alexander stated. Aaron frowned. “Come on, come down.” Aaron silently followed him out the room and down the stairs. Martha and Washington were sat in the kitchen and talking. They stopped when they saw the three boys appear.

“Is everything okay?” Washington asked. Alexander shook his head.

“Martha, can you treat burns?”

“Burns? Yes.”

“Show her.” Alexander muttered. Aaron sighed and slowly lowered his arm, showing the adults his burned skin. Martha gasped and Washington looked furious.

“What happened?” Martha asked, rushing forwards.

“Nothing.” Aaron muttered.

“Don’t be ridiculous!”

“He doesn’t want to talk about it.” Alexander stated, pulling himself up to his not very impressive full height. “So he- he doesn’t have to.”

“Are these self-inflicted?” Washington asked, his voice a dangerous rumble. Aaron slowly nodded.

“I’m sorry, sir.” Aaron whispered. Washington sighed as he looked at the three of them.

“You three haven’t been telling me the truth have you?”

“No, sir.” Alexander muttered. Washington sighed again.

“Alexander, go with Aaron to get patched up. Lafayette, I want a word.”

“I-”

“Now, Lafayette.” Washington’s tone was final and he didn’t miss the flinch from both Aaron and Alexander. He didn’t spend another thought on that as he swept out of the room, knowing that Lafayette would follow.

He sat down in his office and gestured for Lafayette to sit across from him, which the teenager did. Washington then stared at him coolly.

“What did Aaron mean when he said Hercules and John could hit him?”

“Sir-”

“Do not try to lie to me, Lafayette. I am in charge of all three of you equally. I will be asking Aaron and then I will be asking Hercules and John. I believe fully that Aaron will lie to protect you three but I will find the truth.”

“I thought he was watching the videos. I- I knew he knew about Alexander’s abuse. I thought that- that he may have helped.”

“Did you ask him?”

“He gave no answers.”

“And so you hurt him.”

“I-” Lafayette looked away, feeling guilt hit him.

“And you allowed your friends to do the same.” Washington’s tone was full of so much disappointment that Lafayette shrank in his chair.

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m not who you need to say that to. Aaron has been hurt before, he was supposed to be safe here. He is no longer safe because of your actions. I honestly don’t know if he’ll ever trust us again. You need to take that responsibility.”

“I will. I promise.”

“Lafayette, you and I have led a privileged life compared to Alexander and Aaron. We have not been hurt by the people we were told to trust and loved. You remember how long it took Aaron to adjust to how we live here. I do not want Alexander to have that long of an adjustment period.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Figure this out. That’s an order.”

 

Aaron stared down at his arm as Martha gently covered it with bandages. It didn’t hurt and he knew well enough that that wasn’t good.

“Do you want to show me the rest of your injuries?” Martha asked softly. Aaron shook his head and Martha sighed.

“You should.” Alexander muttered. Aaron shook his head again. “Are there more burns?” Aaron paused at that and Alexander scowled. “Show her.” Aaron sighed and slowly pulled down his other sleeve. Martha sucked in a breath.

“Are these also self-inflicted?”

Aaron nodded and Martha sighed before she reached for his arm. He flinched back and she paused.

“I don’t need them to be treated.” Aaron muttered. Alexander scowled.

“Why not?”

“Because they’re my punishment.” Aaron stood and looked around, numbly. Alexander stood as well and frowned. “I only need them to be treated so they don’t get worse.”

“You’re being an idiot.” Alexander snarled. “He’s in your head! He hurt you and he’s still-”

“I let you be raped.” Aaron whispered. Alexander paused. “You’re my best friend. You saved my life. You did so much for me and I let you be raped. I might as well have done it myself.”

“But you didn’t. Shouldn’t I get to set the punishment?”

“I-” Aaron frowned, it made sense. “I don’t think you’d punish me correctly.”

“But you hurt me so I get to decide your punishment.”

“But-”

“And I decide your punishment is done.” Alexander went to cross his arms but paused as his cast made it almost impossible. “You hurt yourself enough. Now you need to get treatment-”

“You know how my punishments end.” Aaron whispered. “If you’re trying to end me hurting myself then you know what you have to do.”

Alexander frowned at that and glanced at Martha.

“How did his punishments end?” Martha asked, confused. Alexander bit down on his lower lip and shook his head.

“It’s gonna be the only way to make him normal.”

“Normal?”

“He- he’s in-” Alexander sighed. “His uncle trained him to behave like this.”

“And how do you stop it?”

“Come on.” Alexander said to Aaron. He gently tugged the teenager up the stairs until they reached Aaron’s room. Aaron then sank to his knees as Alexander sat on the bed above him. Alexander traced the burns slowly before he let out a long breath.

“Please.” Aaron breathed out. Alexander didn’t need to ask what he was asking for.

“Do you want to tell me what you did?”

“I hurt you.” Aaron said softly. Alexander continued to gently trace his arm. “I ignored you when you needed my help. I lied to Lafayette and Thomas and John and Hercules and- and you and that hurt you even more. I promised you that I’d always be there for you but I wasn’t, not when you needed me.”

“And I understand.” Alexander muttered. “I understand. Now what was your punishment?”

“I burned myself. I forced myself into a flashback. I allowed them to hit me and didn’t try to fight back.”

“Do you think you’ve been punished enough?”

“No.”

“Who is in charge of this punishment?”

“You are.”

“I think you’ve been punished enough.” Alexander slid off the bed and knelt next to Aaron. “Your punishment is over, Aaron. You’re safe.”

Aaron felt the energy wash out of him and he collapsed forwards, into Alexander’s waiting arms.

 

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**Is Aaron alright?**

**From: A. Hamm**

**He will be**

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**I’m sorry I didn’t step in earlier**

**From: A. Hamm**

**Why are you being nice to me?**

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**What?**

**From: A. Hamm**

**Why are you suddenly being nice to me?**

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**Realising how much of a duck I used to be**

**From: A. Hamm**

**Duck?**

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**Auto-correct**

**From: A. Hamm**

**Makes more sense**

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**I know we’ve had our disagreements, Alexander but I don’t want to have more**

**From: A. Hamm**

**Are you suggesting some sort of truce?**

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**I was actually hoping we could be friends**

**From: A. Hamm**

**That might be stretching it**

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**How will we know if we never try?**

**From: A. Hamm**

**Have you told James yet?**

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**No and I won’t**

**From: A. Hamm**

**I don’t understand why you don’t spread it around the school**

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**Why would I?**

**From: A. Hamm**

**So you could win. So people could see just how worthless I am**

Thomas stared down at his screen at that and let out a long breath. This felt like a minefield.

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**That wouldn’t be winning, Alexander**

**From: A. Hamm**

**Then what would be?**

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**I don’t know. It’s been a long time since I’ve been trying**


	15. Chapter 15

Alexander sat on the edge of his bed and stared down at his hands. He heard a knock on the door and stood, distancing himself from the bed as he did so. Washington stepped inside and Alexander felt anxiety flare in his chest.

“S-sir.”

“You don’t need to call me sir, Alexander.”

“Yes, s- Washington.”

“The hospital called.”

“W-why?”

“Two reasons. Your blood tests came back.”

“Blood tests?”

“For some STDs.”

“Oh.” Alexander stared down at the floor. “Do you-”

“I don’t know the specifics but they wouldn’t want you in if it wasn’t something.”

“Okay.” Alexander whispered.

“The other thing is your mother. There are some- questions about her.”

“I can answer them.”

“Alexander, how long has it been since your mother woke up?”

“Um, two months?”

“Two months?” Washington asked, trying his hardest to keep his incredulousness out of his voice.

“Ye-yeah.”

“And you didn’t mention that to a doctor before?”

“I didn’t think it was important.”

“Alexander, I- I want you to-” Washington sighed. “I need you to brace yourself.”

“She won’t die.” Alexander assured Washington. “Her being unconscious isn’t a problem or even a part of her illness, it’s just that it tires her out so she needs to sleep more. It would only be a problem if-”

“Alexander, two months?”

“She’s fine.”

“Okay. Do you want to go to the hospital straight after school?”

“Yeah, okay.” Alexander stepped forwards and paused. He turned back to the bed and grabbed the red hoodie before he pulled it over himself.

 

“Hey, whore!”

Alexander flinched at the shout and glanced over his shoulder. He saw three teenagers staring straight at him. Alexander glanced at Aaron who had seen the same thing.

“Just keep walking.” Aaron whispered.

“Whore, I’m talking to you!” The teenager called again. Alexander felt his breathing pick up and he shuddered. The teenagers caught up to the two of them and one of them grabbed Alexander by the shoulder and dragged him into the closest classroom. He then whirled him around, pinning him to the wall. Alexander squeaked in fear and tried to fight back but the teenager held him steady. Aaron surged forwards but was pushed back by another teenager.

“W-what do you want?” Alexander whispered. The teenager grinned and stared at Alexander.

“I heard you give some of the best head around.”

“N-no. I-”

“Don’t lie. We’ve seen the tapes.”

The breath was knocked out of Alexander at that and he stared at the teenager in shock.

“Wh-what?”

“We’ve seen that mouth wrapped around so many cocks. I saw you crying underneath your own step-father, what kind of slut does that?”

“I-”

“Leave him alone.” Aaron growled. He stepped forwards but was slammed back into the wall by two of the teenager’s friends. Alexander glanced at him in fear but Aaron just looked pissed. “He hasn’t done anything!”

“Not yet. You know, I heard they paid you. How much?”

“Get off him!” Aaron shouted. Alexander stared at the teenager in front of him as he tightened his grip.

“How much are you worth?” The teenager whispered.

“Ten dollars, sir.” Alexander whispered. The teenager scoffed.

“They paid you too much.”

Alexander felt his knees hit the floor and he disconnected from reality just as he heard Aaron shouting.

_“Have you blown someone yet?” Adams asked. Alexander shook his head. Reynolds stared at him from behind the camera. Adams slapped him across the face and Alexander stumbled. “Answer me!”_

_“N-no, sir.” Alexander muttered._

_“Get on your knees.” Adams ordered. Alexander fell to the floor and stared up. Adams caressed his face for a long moment. Then he slapped him clean across the face again. Alexander stumbled and Adams grabbed his hair and twisted it. Alexander couldn’t help the yelp of pain he let out._

_“The bitch screams so nicely.” Reynolds murmured as he stepped forwards. The two boxed Alexander in, not allowing him to move at all._

_“Let’s see what else he can do.” Adams reached his other hand down and yanked open Alexander’s mouth. Alexander whined instinctively, his face unable to move. “Undo my belt, bastard.” Alexander felt tears rise in his eyes as he raised his shaking hands._

“Get away from him!”

Alexander sobbed as he heard the shout. He felt hands leave him and he collapsed to the floor. He curled in on himself and raised his arms over his head. The shouting continued.

“What the fuck, Tommy?” The teenager above Alexander spat. “We’re just having some fun with him.”

“I swear, you’d better run.” Thomas growled. Alexander felt gentle hands on him and he flinched back.

“It’s okay, Alexander.” A familiar voice whispered. Alexander slowly looked up at James’ face. “Hey, it’s just me.”

“James?” Alexander whispered. James nodded with a faint smile on his face.

“He’s just a slut, Thomas.” The teenager said from above Alexander. “He’s asking for it. Those videos showed that, showed him begging for it and-”

“What videos?” Thomas asked, fury building in his voice.

“The ones showing him getting railed by as many men could fit in him.”

James took Alexander’s hand and squeezed gently. Alexander was crying softly.

“So what, you think that means you can rape him in a classroom?” Thomas spat out.

“If I don’t do it someone else will, won’t be long until the whore goes crawling around after some dick. Might as well be mine.”

“Don’t talk about him like that.”

“Why? You wanna do that? Is that why you have a problem with it, Thomas? You wanna dominate him? Wanna pin him down and listen to him scream? I-” The teenager broke off with a cry of pain as Thomas shouted out in rage.

Alexander stared up as Thomas advanced on the teenager.

“How dare you?” Thomas shouted. “How fucking dare you?”

“Shit.” James whispered. He stood and grabbed Thomas’ arm. “Thomas, stop.”

“Did you hear what he-”

“Thomas!” James shouted. Thomas took in a deep breath and closed his eyes. “They’re gone. You did that. And now Alexander is terrified and he needs you.” Thomas looked back and stared at Alexander. He hurried forwards and crouched down.

“Hey, Alexander.”

“Thomas.” Alexander muttered.

“Do you- do you want to put your shirt back on?”

Alexander stared down at his chest and was surprised to see it was bare. He pulled his shirt around and tried to do up the buttons. His fingers felt numb and they were shaking too badly.

“Alexander, do you want me to do that?”

“Yes please.” Alexander whispered. Thomas nodded and reached forwards slowly. He did up the buttons slowly, trying his hardest not to touch Alexander too much.

“Okay, it’s done. It’s done.”

“Aaron?”

“He went to get Washington.” Thomas moved slightly and sat down on the floor. Alexander could see a crowd behind him peering in through the door and he looked down, ashamed. “Hey, do you wanna go somewhere quieter?”

Alexander put a hand to his chin and felt dried saliva on his chin. New tears budded in his eyes and he shuddered.

“He- he didn’t- he didn’t finish.” Thomas muttered. “If that’s- if that helps.”

“But he nearly did.” Alexander’s voice was hoarse and he blinked back tears.

“Come on.” Thomas pulled him to his feet. “James-”

“I’ll explain it to Washington.” James said softly.

“I’m taking him to the quiet room.”

Alexander felt his legs moving but didn’t know where he was going. Then there was a soft seat underneath him and he pulled his knees up to his chin.

“Here’s your hoodie.” Thomas muttered. Alexander held it close to him and wiped away the tears gathering on his face. “I- I’m sorry I didn’t get there earlier.”

“They’ve seen the videos.” Alexander whispered. “They- they saw the video. They knew.”

“They didn’t know-”

“They know that I’m just a ten dollar whore.” Alexander covered his face with his hands and began to sob. He couldn’t control himself. After a long moment there was a warm arm around him and he leant back into it.

“You’re not just a ten dollar whore.” Thomas whispered.

“They- they paid me. Ten dollars.” Alexander muttered. “They’d- they’d throw it at me. Just- just leave me lying there covered in- and- and they’d throw the money down as if I was- I’m nothing, Thomas. And I know that but it- it hurts. It hurts so bad.”

“Do you think prostitutes are less because of what they do?” Thomas asked suddenly. Alexander looked up in surprise.

“No.”

“Do you think someone who sleeps around is worth less?”

“Course not.”

“Do you think someone who was sexually abused is?”

“It’s not the same.”

“How?”

“Because I asked for it, I teased him and- and egged him on and forced him-”

“Forced him to fuck you?” Thomas scoffed. “To shoot those videos? To bring his friends over? You didn’t force any of that, Alexander!”

“I knew you wouldn’t understand.” Alexander breathed out.

“What is there to understand? You believe the bullshit that was fed to you and it’s hurting you.”

“It’s not that simple, Thomas.”

“He raped you, Alexander. He pinned you down and raped you. Then he held your mother’s life over your head. It wasn’t a scenario where you even sort of wanted it. It wasn’t a confusion of consent or a moment where it could be forgiven. He raped you and-”

“And I begged him to.” Alexander whispered. “I begged him to so I could get money.”

“There’s no such thing as a child prostitute, Alexander. There’s only a child who’s being abused.”

“No. This- why don’t you fuck me?”

“Ex-excuse me?” Thomas sputtered.

“You want to hurt me, you-”

“I don’t. Maybe- maybe I used to but I don’t want to hurt you now, Alexander. I haven’t for a very long time.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh. I thought-”

“You thought that cause you’re an idiot. In a- in a nice way. I mean-” Thomas sighed. “I don’t know, Alexander. Ever since that video I- I can’t help but think of you as- as someone I need to protect. Not like- not like you can’t do it for yourself but- I _want_ to protect you. I want to-” Thomas sighed. “I want to keep you safe, Alexander.”

Alexander stared at Thomas for a long moment before he pushed himself forwards. Their lips met and Thomas let out a soft exclamation of surprise. Alexander gently twined his hands into Thomas’ hair. Thomas’ hands slowly made their way up Alexander’s front until they were lying against the other teen’s chest.

Then Thomas was pushing him backwards and Alexander was landing hard on the floor.

Thomas rose and stared down at Alexander in a mix of shock and horror.

“Wh-what was that?”

“I-” Alexander shrugged helplessly. He didn’t know why he thought Thomas might want him, why he even considered Thomas thinking about him like that for a second. Thomas was disgusted with him, had to be.

Thomas had seen the videos. Thomas had seen him begging and pleading and crying as his step father used him like the whore he was. He’d seen all those men hurting him.

“I’m sorry.” Alexander whispered before he ran from the room. Anything that Thomas might have yelled faded into nothingness in Alexander’s head as he berated himself.

The ten dollar whore didn’t get to touch Thomas Jefferson.


	16. Chapter 16

Alexander sat outside Washington’s office and stared down at his hands. The door to the corridor swung open and Alexander’s head snapped up. Lafayette stood there for a moment before he rushed forwards and pulled Alexander into a tight hug.

“I was so scared, petit!”

“Everybody knows.” Alexander murmured. Lafayette sighed.

“It will be-”

“They know!” Alexander shouted, anger exploding out of him. “They know I’m just a worthless slut, Laf!”

“That’s not true.” Aaron said softly. Alexander glanced at him before he shook his head.

“I sank to my knees because he- I let him- I let him, Aaron! I let all of them! I let them hurt me and fuck me and infect me! And- and what does it fucking do in the end?”

“It sav-”

“Two months!” Alexander screamed. “Two months, Laf! There’s-” Alexander sat down abruptly and covered his face as tears poured down his face. “Two months.”

“I do not understand, petit.”

“I do.” Washington stepped out of his office and stared down at Alexander who didn’t even glance up at him. “It’s been two months since his mother woke up, Lafayette.”

“Merde.”

“I thought she was fine?” Aaron asked in confusion.

“When she slept she needed oxygen.” Washington said softly. “So every night Alexander would put her onto the oxygen and every morning he’d take her off it.”

“And if she didn’t wake up?”

“Then her body is fine.” Washington said softly. “Alexander, we need to go to the hospital.”

“No.”

“Alexander-”

“No. I’m not fucking going!”

“Alexander-”

“I want to go home!”

“I can’t take you and-”

“Sir, I’m ready to get on my knees for a fucking stranger just so I don’t have to be here.” Alexander spat out. “Now can I get a lift or am I going to fucking hitchhike?”

“Hercules can drive us.” Lafayette interjected quickly. Washington nodded slowly, looking almost scared.

“Lafayette, Aaron, I’ll mark you absent as well. Keep him safe.”

 

Thomas lay in his bed, staring at his ceiling. Every time he closed his eyes he could remember the feel of Alexander’s chapped lips against his, the touch of Alexander’s hand in his hair as the boy brought them closer.

Thomas let out a half whimper as he imagined what he could have done, gently kissed Alexander back, pressed his tongue into the teenager’s mouth. The thought of that fist video came into his mind and he flushed as one hand reached into his pyjama bottoms.

He’d never admit it but he’d been looking for Alexander. Not expecting to find what he did, of course, but expecting to find someone who looked enough like Alexander to trick his mind into thinking it was the same.

Thomas closed his eyes and imagined pinning Alexander down, seeing the fear in the teenager’s eyes relax into acceptance and the resistance sliding away as he realised who it was. Bending down, kissing Alexander again and again until the teenager was a writhing mess underneath him.

Alexander made a mewling sound, Thomas had heard it on the video, when he was needy enough, Thomas knew he could drive Alexander to make that noise. He could tease and draw Alexander out until the teenager was begging for him.

Thomas sucked in a shuddering breath as he remembered the other video.

He pulled his hand out and stared at the wall as if it had personally insulted him. He knew he’d seen too much, far too much. What kind of monster did it make him to want Alexander in that position again?

Thomas stood and grabbed his phone.

**To: Alexander**

**I’m sorry about what I did earlier**

**From: Alexander**

**It’s fine**

**To: Alexander**

**No it’s not, you’re hurt and I shouldn’t have kissed you**

**From: Alexander**

**I kissed you remember?**

**To: Alexander**

**Then I should have stopped it sooner**

**From: Alexander**

**I get you didn’t want it, Thomas, can we just not talk about it again? Please?**

**To: Alexander**

**Of course. Is there anything I can do?**

**From: Alexander**

**I’m okay thanks**

**To: Alexander**

**I’m here to talk to, if you want**

**From: Alexander**

**I just want to know where they got the videos from**

**To: Alexander**

**I can find that out**

**From: Alexander**

**Really?**

**To: Alexander**

**I know these people**

**From: Alexander**

**Thank you Thomas**

**To: Alexander**

**It’s the least I can do**

Thomas set the phone down and turned to his laptop. He booted it up and brought up his messenger. There, at the top, was the man he wanted to talk to. Thomas took in a deep breath before he clicked on the name.

**To: King**

**Where did you get those vids?**

It didn’t take long for the teenager to answer.

**From: King**

**They got sent round in an email**

**From: King**

**What was wrong with you today?**

**To: King**

**What do you mean?**

**From: King**

**You’re always talking about how you want to show Hamilton who’s boss. You had the chance**

**To: King**

**I don’t want to fucking rape him!**

**From: King**

**He wants it, Tommy**

**To: King**

**Don’t call me that**

**From: King**

**Oh come on, are you still pissed at me?**

**To: King**

**Now why on earth would I still be pissed at you?**

Thomas navigated his way to the school email before he clicked it open.

**From: ADRESS OUTSIDE YOUR NETWORK- DANGER**

**To: ALL STUDENTS**

**Want to see Alexander Hamilton put in his place?**

Thomas stared at the URL underneath the line of text. It was simple but that was all it would take for people like King, people who wanted to rip Alexander apart. He clicked through on the URL and felt bile rising in his throat as he looked at the comments.

Comment after comment was talking as if the person knew Alexander, as if they went to his school. There were few, if any, comments about how he shouldn’t be there. As Thomas stared down he felt revulsion rise as he realised that half the school had to have watched these videos, must have seen Alexander helpless and trapped underneath these men and decided to do nothing.

**From: King**

**I dunno, you still caught up in that whole cheating thing?**

**To: King**

**Now you mention it, how is Charlotte?**

**From: King**

**Oh come on, baby, you know there’s always room for you if you want it**

**To: King**

**No thanks**

**From: King**

**What you’d rather fuck Hamilton? I see why**

**To: King**

**Fuck off**

**From: King**

**Watch this one**

Thomas stared at the link, every instinct in him screaming at him to navigate away, to not look into Alexander’s life at this moment of absolute loss. He should just-

Alexander’s whimpers filled the room and Thomas scrambled for his headphones. He plugged them in and stared at the screen in horror. There were masked men gathered around him, on top of him, staring down at the gagged and restrained teenager with such predatory lust in their eyes that Thomas nearly vomited.

He closed the tab and looked away, breathing deeply.

**To: King**

**What the fuck?**

**From: King**

**See? Coming back to me wouldn’t be that bad if we got a bitch like Hamilton to take it**

**To: King**

**Don’t you dare**

**From: King**

**I appreciate you trying to be noble but it won’t work, Tommy**

**To: King**

**Don’t call me that**

**From: King**

**He’s a whore. He’ll go back to it sooner or later. When he does, he’ll come crawling to me**

**To: King**

**Why?**

**From: King**

**Because I can pay him**

**To: King**

**You’ve got this all wrong and you need to stop, okay?**

**From: King**

**You’re no fun, Tommy**

**To: King**

**As someone who used to love you, trust me**

**From: King**

**You like him, don’t you?**

**To: King**

**What?**

**From: King**

**You’ve fallen in love with the slut**

**To: King**

**Don’t call him that**

**From: King**

**Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone. But really, just settle for his videos. He’ll never be satisfied**

**To: King**

**You have no fucking clue okay? He’s not a slut or a whore or any of this shit you’re calling him and if I hear you call him that I will deck you**

**From: King**

**Chill, Tommy. You still into dp? Watch these**

Thomas stared as message after message came in, each one a new link to a new video. He felt the vomit he’d been holding back overwhelm him and he ran into his bathroom where he just managed to get to the toilet. Then he was throwing up again and again at the thought that someone like King had seen Alexander (his Alexander, a treacherous voice in his head whispered) being hurt so badly.

Alexander didn’t deserve this, didn’t deserve any of this.

**From: Alexander**

**Any luck?**

Thomas groaned at the thought of responding to Alexander. Instead he picked up the phone and typed in Alexander’s number. Alexander picked it up and there was silence for a long moment.

“Thomas?” Alexander asked softly.

“I’m sorry.” Thomas mumbled. “Half the school must have watched them, Alexander. It was a school wide email from- from someone called John.”

“My step dad.” Alexander muttered.

“I’m sorry.”

“Did you watch any more of them?”

“Not really?”

“Not really?”

“I saw- glimpses but-”

“You might as well watch them all. What difference will it make?” Alexander laughed coldly. “Everyone knows what a slut I am. You might as well.”

“Alexander-”

“I’ve just had a whole day of people fucking pandering to me, Thomas. I don’t need you to do it as well.”

“I wasn’t going to.”

“You were.”

“Fine, wanna know what I really think about all this?”

“Go.”

“I think you’ve made enemies in this school. I think you made them on purpose. I think they’re pissed enough at you to not care that it’s rape or maybe even to get off on that! I think you’re going to be paying for this for so fucking long and the only way to make it better is to accept help and stop trying to push everyone away!”

“Did you want to see me hurt?” Alexander asked softly. Thomas sighed. “Cause, thing is, I remember that first video. I remember that I had a mask but you know what else? I- I still had a fucking gag in my mouth. I still got rope burn from trying to get out. I still bled on the fucking sheets!”

“Alexander-”

“No, you try to take the moral high ground but we both know you can’t! You watched me being raped, Thomas and got off on it!”

There was dead silence for a long moment before Thomas’ heart crumbled as he heard Alexander sob.

“Alexander-”

“You know, I knew I was in trouble when they called me that.” Alexander whispered. “They called me bitch or bastard. Alexander- Alexander meant I was in trouble. That was what he called me before he broke my arm. When he- he walked in on-”

“Alexander, you don’t need to talk about this.”

“Tomorrow everyone will have watched those videos, Thomas. I know how cyber bullying works. Everyone wants to see me put in my place.”

“We can- we can try to take them down or-”

“And then he’ll send the raw footage around. Anyway, I’m looking at Youtube right now.”

“No way.”

“Yep.” Alexander let out a long breath. “It’s the internet, Thomas. When- when it’s there-”

“It’ll never go away.”

“Everyone knows. And- and everyone always will.”

“Alexander-”

“If someone types in my name they’ll find pictures of me being fucked, Thomas! Of- of every dirty little thing my step father wanted me to do. And- and- and that won’t change.”

“It might.”

“You’re lying.”

“Alexander-”

“No! You don’t-” Alexander broke off with a sigh. “I want you to watch the videos.”

“What?”

“How many are there?”

“A- a lot.”

“We’d only film one or two most days.” Alexander whispered. “But then the weekend- that was- we’d film something with him in the morning then he would take me away to- and then-”

“I don’t have to watch them.”

“I want someone I trust to know about them. I don’t- I don’t remember them.”

“What?”

“I went into this- this kind of-” Alexander sighed. “Some kind of fugue state. I wasn’t real. I don’t know what happened.”

“Alexander, if-”

“Please, Thomas. Please watch them.”

Thomas sighed and nodded.

“Okay.”

“Thank you.” Alexander whispered.

“But explain this to Lafayette or Aaron first.”

“I will, promise.”

“Stay safe, Alexander.”

“Thank you, Thomas.”

“I’m doing what anyone would.”

“No you’re not. That’s the problem.”


	17. Chapter 17

 The next day, Alexander walked into school flanked by Hercules, Lafayette, John and Aaron. The corridors fell silent as he walked past. When he paused at his locker there was a loud wolf whistle and there was a wave of laughter. John whirled on his heel, searching for the source but Alexander just grabbed his arm.

“It’s okay.”

“No it’s fucking not.” John growled out. Alexander shrugged and grabbed the textbooks he’d need for the day.

“Aaron’s in your first class.” Lafayette said softly. “I am in your second and we are all in your final class.”

“And- and my third one?” Alexander asked, already knowing the answer. Lafayette sighed. “Yeah. Course.”

“I got your ten dollars!” Someone yelled. Alexander flinched and this time couldn’t stop John striding a few paces forwards, searching angrily for who said it.

“Let’s get somewhere quiet.” Aaron murmured. Alexander nodded and they made their way to the classroom. They all sat in a circle around Alexander, as if that would protect him from anything. Other students slowly filed in and stared openly at Alexander as they did. Alexander stared down at his hands.

“I told Thomas to watch the videos.” Alexander admitted softly. The group turned to him in surprise.

“Que?”

“I don’t remember what I did during them.” Alexander continued to stare down at his hands, not even glancing up. “I need to know.”

“Isn’t there a better-”

“I need to know.” Alexander spoke over Hercules. “I have- I have nightmares and I need someone to talk to and make sure they’re not real, make sure I didn’t really…” Alexander paused and looked sick for a moment.

“Why don’t you let one of us do it then?” Aaron asked softly.

“I don’t want to look at you guys and know that you know. Thomas- Thomas I can ignore if everything goes wrong. Everyone knows now so it’s not like he has more power or anything. I just- I have to know that he didn’t actually-”

“It’s okay.” John whispered. He put a gentle hand on the middle of Alexander’s back. “We can talk to him about it and arrange some time you two can talk privately when you feel safe or- or whatever.”

“Aw, how sweet,”

Alexander froze at King’s voice. The boy seemed intent on ruining his day.

“Piss off, King.” Hercules snapped. King just smiled widely. The class fell silent as King walked into the classroom.

“I thought it was just yesterday you were getting off with Tommy. Now John?”

“King you can-” John pulled away from Alexander and went to punch King but Alexander grabbed his shirt first. King’s eyes sparkled with mirth as Alexander stood and faced King.

“What do you want?”

“I want what’s mine.” King growled. He stepped forwards. “I want the slut to bend over for me.”

“I- I won’t do that.” Alexander’s voice shook and King scowled.

“Not yet.”

“Not fucking ever!” John spat out. “Now unless you want to-”

“King! Laurens!” The teacher hurried into the classroom and stared at them. “Neither of you are in this lesson! The bell’s about to ring, now go.” John scowled at King before he stalked off. Hercules and Lafayette also stood.

 “Good luck, mon ami.” Lafayette whispered. Alexander offered him a shaking smile and sat down. He could feel everyone staring at him.

“Going to the hospital tonight?” Aaron asked softly. Alexander nodded.

“Right after school.”

“I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

“And if it’s not? If it’s…”

“What are you worried about?”

“Aids.” Alexander stated. Aaron stared at him for a moment before he looked away.

“Oh.”

“Yeah.” Alexander scoffed. “A fucking picnic.”

 

The rest of the day went by fairly normally. If everyone staring and whispering counted as normal. Alexander barely ate anything at lunch once more, just stared down at the sandwich Martha had made for him.

“You gonna be okay?” Aaron asked quietly. Alexander shrugged.

“What’s your next class?” Thomas asked. The table turned to stare at him and he stared at Alexander.

“AP English.”

“I have that on Monday.”

“It’s a senior class.” Alexander murmured.

“You’re in AP English for the next year up? Shit.” Thomas chuckled. “I never even got offered for that shit.”

“Me neither.” Alexander glanced at Thomas and smiled. “I just didn’t stop asking.” Thomas grinned at that.

“Petit is very strong.” Lafayette laid a gentle hand on Alexander’s shoulder which caused the boy to tense up slightly. Lafayette frowned and removed his hand, letting it drop to his side.

“I might know someone in that class.” Thomas murmured. He pulled out his phone. Alexander glanced at it and froze as he saw King’s name. Thomas glanced at him and swiped King’s texts away. “He won’t stop texting.” Thomas said softly. Alexander looked away and tried to take in a slow breath.

“W-who?”

“I-” Thomas paused as another text came through. Alexander stared down at it and felt bile rise in his throat.

**From: King**

**You talk to that slut but not me, Tommy? Is he really that good of a fuck?**

“Alexander-” Thomas said softly. Alexander stared at the phone for a moment. John looked over and stared down at it. He scowled and looked up at Thomas.

“I think you should go.” John said with a warning in his voice. Thomas nodded slowly and rose. James also rose and they walked off to another table. John then turned to Alexander who was just staring down. “Alexander?”

“I just want to get this day over with.” Alexander said softly. “I just-”

“Okay. Want me to walk you to your class?”

“No.” Alexander stood and tried to ignore how people turned to stare. “It’s- it’s better for- I should just get over this.”

“No-one expects you to-”

“I’m gonna go. See you at break.” Alexander walked off and ignored the loud wolf whistle that followed him. The corridors were mostly empty and the few students who were there, turned to stare but didn’t say a word.

Alexander could feel sweat building on his hands and he wiped them on his trousers. He walked up to his classroom and paused. The room was empty. He glanced behind him and saw a student staring at him. The other student immediately looked away and took out their phone.

Alexander flushed and hurried to the bathroom that was just across the corridor. He closed the stall and sat down onto the toilet seat, trying to breathe calmly. His breath was just ratcheting up and up. Everyone was going to be staring at him, everyone was going to be undressing him with their eyes, imagining him crying out and being hurt as they fucked him.

He leant his sweaty head against the cool stall and tried to centre himself. A quiet whine escaped his mouth and he reached shaking hands into his bag. He pulled out his water bottle and started to try to pry the top off. The bell rang out, piercingly loud in his state.

Alexander’s hands slipped and the bottle landed hard on the floor, spilling water across the floor. He stared at it for a moment before he grabbed the water bottle and shoved it back into his bag. He could feel tears sliding down his face but he scrubbed them away and hurried back to the classroom.

He sank down into his seat and stared around. He sat in the middle of the class, an empty seat next to him.

Alexander put his water bottle at the front of his desk, trying to keep the wet outside away from his books. He then pulled out his notebook, the book they were studying and a pen. He then looked up to the front of the class. The teacher stared at him for a moment before she looked away.

Alexander felt someone sit down next to him but he didn’t glance up. It was probably just whoever Thomas had asked to watch him.

He tried not to be offended by that, the fact that he had to be looked after like some kind of child.

“So you’re the one who’s enraptured Tommy.”

Alexander froze at the voice and glanced at the boy sat next to him. King grinned back and Alexander sucked in a sharp breath.

“G-go away.”

“No.” King stated. “Now you’d better pay attention.” He gestured to the teacher who had started talking. “Wouldn’t want to see you without an education, now would we?”

Alexander turned to stare at the teacher but the words coming out of her mouth didn’t mean anything, he couldn’t understand them at all. She could have been speaking Greek for all he understood.

It only got worse as Alexander felt a hand on his knee. He froze and glanced at King who was staring ahead with a smile on his face too wide to be innocent. Alexander tried to shift away but King just tightened his grip.

“King- George-” Alexander whispered. King didn’t even look at him, instead he just inched his hand up further. Alexander wanted to throw the hand off him but he couldn’t.

“Shh.” King whispered back. Alexander took in a shuddering breath as he felt the hand inch further up. It began to fondle the inside of his thigh, just inches from the top of his leg.

“Please stop.” Alexander whispered. He glanced around. Everyone was paying attention to the teacher. No-one was watching. No-one could see as King’s hand danced upwards.

“Just take it.”

Something in Alexander told him to scream but he didn’t. He just stared ahead as he felt tears drop onto his notebook.

_“Take it.” Reynolds hissed down at Alexander as he tightened the ropes that held his hands around his back. Alexander twisted frantically and Reynolds didn’t even hesitate to slap him across the face. “You will be quiet and take it, got it?”_

_Alexander stared up and slowly nodded. Reynolds grinned, a feral grin that made new tears spring to Alexander’s eyes._

_“My little bitch, tied up ready for me.” Reynolds ran his hands down Alexander’s sides and groaned. He canted his hips forwards slightly and Alexander recoiled in response, Reynolds grabbed his hair and tugged him forwards. “You can’t escape this, Alexander. You could scream at the top of your lungs and nothing would change because nobody wants to waste time on a worthless bitch like you. They’ll be happy when you’re dead.”_

“Get off him!”

Alexander fell back in his seat as he felt the hand on him, the invading, treacherous hand that spoke of so much pain, vanish. He buried his head in his hands and began to sob as he heard shouts.

Then there was a gentle hand on his shoulder and he froze, not daring to do anything against this new attacker.

“Come on.” It was a soft voice, a voice that Alexander wanted to obey. He stood and was slowly led out of the room until he was in the corridor. He then glanced up to see Angelica Schuyler’s worried face staring down at him. He didn’t know the teenager very well, he rarely if ever spoke to her but he knew of her, everyone did.

“Angelica?”

“Yeah, who do you want me to call?”

“I don’t- what- what happened?” Alexander glanced behind him and saw, through the glass panes in the door, the class staring at him.

“King was- touching you. I punched him.” Angelica held out her right hand and he stared at the bloody knuckles.

“Shouldn’t have done that.” Alexander murmured. Angelica shrugged.

“King doesn’t scare me, Alexander and it was obvious you were scared.”

“I’m sorry you got dragged into this.”

“Dragged into this?” Angelica scoffed. “I didn’t. I chose to punch the weasel. And I-”

“What if he does it again?”

“Then I’ll punch him again. And I won’t stop until he’s unconscious.”

“But-”

“Do you have a phone on you?” Angelica asked, trying to keep her tone light. Alexander slowly nodded and handed it to her. “Okay, I’ve put my number in there.”

“Okay.” Alexander turned back to the classroom and Angelica caught his arm.

“What are you doing?”

“Going back- back to class.” Alexander wiped at his face, trying to get rid of the tears. Angelica stared at him as if he was insane.

“You’re kidding, right?”

“What?”

“You can’t just- just go back to class! Not when there’s a guy in there who won’t stop trying to fucking rape you!”

“I have to.” Alexander said dully. “I- I have to- I have to learn.”

“There are other ways to do that. Anyway, I need to get you to Washington.”

“No!” Alexander shook his head and took a step backwards, hitting the wall. “I- I don’t want him to know!”

“Alexander, he’s the headmaster. He’d gonna find out.”

“But-”

“He won’t do anything, Alexander. I promise.”

“I don’t want him to think I’m still a whore.” Alexander whispered and Angelica felt her stomach drop.

“Alexander, I swear, if anyone tries to touch you without your permission I’ll hit them, okay? And I know your friends will do the same.”

“And if they figure it out? What- what I am?”

“Do you really think Aaron would do anything like that to you?” Angelica asked softly. Alexander frowned. He couldn’t imagine it. On the other hand, he had never imagined his step father going that far before he did.

“You- you know Aaron?”

“A bit. I knew his sister. Before-” Alexander looked away at that and Alexander nodded.

“Before.”

“I helped her, you know.” Angelica said softly. “One of my- my biggest mistakes.”

“He doesn’t talk about her. Never.”

“Would you want to?” Angelica asked. Alexander didn’t hold her eyes and she smiled, a slow and sad smile. “Look we- we need to go to Washington.”

“And if I don’t wanna?”

“Alexander… tell me what I can do to make you trust me.”

“Tell me what you want from me. What you really want.” Alexander crossed his arms. It did virtually nothing to make him look bigger, instead only made him look defensive and far too small. Angelica stared at him for a long moment before she sighed and nodded.

“I agreed to look after you because of Thomas and-”

“Bull.” Alexander spat out. Angelica scowled. “You don’t get that angry because a friend of a friend was- was being-”

“I have a friend.” Angelica admitted softly. “She- she went through what you did. Not- well not quite but-”

“Rape.” Alexander stated. Angelica flinched at the word but nodded.

“She was raped. And- and I need someone to talk to her because it’s the only way she’ll get better but- but she won’t talk to me or my family or her friends. She’s cut herself off from everything. I- I’m scared for her, Alexander. And I just- I want her to have someone.”

“That someone being me?”

“Yeah.”

Alexander looked away and sighed.

“I can’t help anyone, Angelica. Not anymore.”

“How do you know if you don’t try?”


	18. Chapter 18

Washington stared at Alexander as he sat in the waiting room. He looked empty. Angelica sat next to him and was chatting quietly.

“Alexander.” Washington stated. Alexander was on his feet in seconds. He didn’t look at Washington’s face, instead focusing on his shoes. But Washington could see the fear in his eyes. “Why are you out of class?”

“I wasn’t feeling well, sir.” Alexander muttered.

“So why aren’t you in the nurse’s office?”

“I- I wanna go home.” Alexander wrapped his arms around him. Washington stared at him for a moment before he glanced at Angelica. Angelica didn’t say anything but she scowled.

“And it wouldn’t have anything to do with why George King is currently sat in the cooler?”

“I- I-”

“Alexander, I cannot help you if you will not tell me.”

“Nothing happened.” Alexander stared at the floor.

“Alexander, cut the bullshit!” Angelica cried out. Alexander sighed.

“It won’t help anything for him to be punished.”

“Why not?”

“Because…”

“Alexander,” Washington paused for a long second. “I don’t care about what happens to him. You are my foster child and I care about what happens to you.”

“He wouldn’t stop touching me.” Alexander said softly. “He- he put his hand on my leg and kept on- kept on moving it up and just- feeling me and I couldn’t- he didn’t stop.”

“Alexander, that’s sexual assault. I can report him to the police.”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because- because he-” Alexander glanced back at Angelica who frowned back. “I just want to go home.”

“Alexander, with everything that’s happened I think it would be prudent for you to take several days off school.”

“What?”

“The teachers have told me how much you’re struggling in classes since this email was sent around. I think it is only going to get worse if you stay here.”

“I can’t just run away because it’s difficult.”

“Yes you can.” Washington stated. “And beyond that, I think it will be detrimental to your healing process to continue coming into school. I don’t trust the children here not to hurt you worse than you already have been hurt. It will be better for you to recover first.”

“I don’t want to.”

“I’m sorry, Alexander but as the principal then I will force you. Either you allow me to mark you as sick or I will mark you as suspended and if you try to get onto campus then security will escort you off it.”

“But-” Alexander stared at Washington before he shifted his stare to his feet. “Okay.”

“Angelica, I appreciate you defending Alexander but you did punch King. You need to leave the school for the rest of today. I’ll ring your father tonight and talk about an acceptable punishment.”

“Okay.”

“Would you also be able to bring Alexander home? I know you know where I live and I think it would be better for Alexander to go home now.”

“Of course.” Angelica pulled out her car keys and paused. “Peggy needs to get home later.”

“I’ll arrange someone to bring her home, either I’ll do it or Hercules Mulligan.”

“Okay.”

 

Alexander sat on the sofa, staring into nothingness. Angelica had left. Aaron and Lafayette were still at school. Martha was at work. He was alone.

He wiped away the tears on his cheeks. He didn’t even know why he was crying, just knew that he shouldn’t be, didn’t need to. His phone buzzed and he looked down.

**From: Unknown Number**

**You know they’ll get tired of you, bastard. Then they’ll use you until you break and throw you aside**

Alexander sniffed and looked away. He knew Adams was right, knew he was almost always right. His friends wouldn’t put up with him for much longer. He didn’t know who’d turn first, who’d hurt him first but he knew one of them would.

No-one was foolish enough to leave something like him untouched.

The phone buzzed again and Alexander sighed. He glanced down at his phone and paused.

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**I swear that I had no idea King was going to do that Alexander**

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**He’s a crazy ex, that’s it**

**To: Thomas Jefferson**

**Ok**

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**Are you okay?**

**To: Thomas Jefferson**

**Sure**

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**They’re talking about permanent exclusion for King. After what he did yesterday they could involve the police**

**To: Thomas Jefferson**

**They won’t**

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**Why not?**

**To: Thomas Jefferson**

**I don’t want them to**

**From: Thomas Jefferson**

**???**

Alexander placed his phone on the side and curled into himself. He pulled the blanket over his head and let out a long sigh. He didn’t want this. He just wanted this to be over with.

His phone buzzed again and he didn’t have the energy to check just who it was.

 

Aaron stared up at Lafayette who was pacing the floor outside the principal’s office. He seemed full of the nervous energy that was just making Aaron sick.

“You can sit down, you know.” Aaron said softly. Lafayette shook his head and continued to pace.

“I should have been there! I should have been in that room!”

“We can’t always be in the room where… that happens. We have to trust Alexander to deal with it himself.”

“Deal with it himself? He was nearly raped again!” Lafayette paused in his pacing and stared out the window. “And I could not defend him.”

“We can’t.”

“We should try!”

“There’s a difference between defending him and trying to live his life for him.” Aaron said softly. “And we have to believe that Alexander will try his hardest to recover.”

Washington stepped out of his office at that moment and Aaron rose to stare at him.

“Let’s get home.” Washington half ordered. “I need to talk to Alexander about going to the hospital.”

“Why?” Lafayette asked, falling into step behind Washington.

“He has an STD.” Aaron said quietly. Washington paused at that and stared at him before he slowly nodded.

“How do you know that, Aaron?”

“Alexander told me earlier. Or- or insinuated it anyway.”

“He must be hurting so bad.” Lafayette murmured.

“He’s scared it’s AIDs.” Aaron stated. He stared up at Washington who sighed.

“The preliminary tests for that were negative. I doubt it is that but- well, we don’t know. And we won’t until we can get him to go to hospital.”

 

James stared at Thomas as the teenager stared down at his phone. James sighed and rolled his eyes.

“Who’s texting you?”

“Huh?”

“Who’s texting you?”

“Oh.” Thomas pocketed the phone and shook his head. “No-one.”

“Come off it. Is it Alexander?”

“Why would you think that?”

“Because ever since those videos came out we’ve spent most of our time around that group despite never doing it beforehand.”

“We sometimes ate with Gil.”

“We didn’t eat with Alexander though. And there was all that stuff before the videos, you saw him being hurt and were really worried.”

“He came into school limping!”

“I’m not saying you shouldn’t have been worried. I’m just saying that you’re acting differently around him. Like you-”

“It’s complicated, James, okay?”

“You knew, didn’t you? You knew before everyone else did.”

“James-”

“I know the guy, Thomas and I know you. I know you two annoy each other for shits and giggles. But now you’re suddenly getting along perfectly? Don’t try to lie to me.”

“I found the website.” Thomas admitted quietly. James nodded slowly. “I was- I was just looking for someone who looked enough like him for me to imagine and then I found him. Actual him. And I- I was going to blackmail him, James. I was going to force him to do- something, I hadn’t decided, and if he didn’t then I’d spread the videos around.”

“I wouldn’t have let you do that.”

“How would you have stopped me?”

“Thomas, you barely have to see one of those videos to realise he didn’t want it. I would have told you that and at the very least, warned Alexander first.”

“I talked to him about it. I told him it was a federal crime and that he needed to stop doing the videos. He broke down and explained everything.”

“Everything?”

“He told me that his step-father was raping him and forcing him to sleep with other people for money. He broke down crying and- and I tried to get him to say more but he ran off because his step-father had threatened his mother’s life.”

“Shit.”

“I- I’m just trying to help, James. I’m just trying to help him.”

 

Angelica walked up the staircase and paused outside one room. She took in a deep breath before she knocked gently on the door.

“Who is it?” A voice from inside called.

“Angelica.”

Angelica stood still as she heard movement and then the door unlocked. She took in a breath as she stared down at Eliza. Her short hair was dry and lifeless, much like her eyes.

Eliza’s normally soft eyes darted around the corridor before she even glanced at Angelica. Her eyes immediately slid off her sister and she stared down at the floor.

“Do you- do you need something?”

“Do you want to join us for dinner?”

“Not hungry.”

“Liza, you- you haven’t been eating much.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“But-”

“I do not want it.” Eliza crossed her arms and glanced up at Angelica. “S-so don’t ask again.”

“Okay.” Angelica sighed as she caught sight of the nasty half healed scab across Eliza’s forehead. “That’s gonna scar.” Eliza raised a shaking hand to it before she stared down at the floor again.

“Maybe.”

“I- I got asked by Tommy to do something today.” Angelica paused but Eliza didn’t say a word. “He asked me if- if I could look after a kid called Alexander Hamilton.” Eliza glanced up at that and frowned. “He’s in- he was in your year. Remember?”

“Yeah.”

“Well he- he went through- something happened to him and-” Angelica sighed and shook her head. “Liza, he was abused by his step-father.”

“So?”

“Raped.”

Eliza glanced at her again and scowled. Angelica looked away, not used to the expression on her normally gentle sister’s face.

“So?” Eliza asked, pointedly.

“He was raped and hit and filmed.” Angelica’s voice was still soft. “He hid it so his mother was safe. Then his friends got him out, reported his step father to the police and the man spread the videos around the school. Today I- I had to pull someone off him and- and he was surprised that anyone came to his defence. I want to help him, Liza. So bad.”

“And?”

“I want you to help him.”

“No.”

“Eliza-”

“I’m not talking to someone about this. I told you that.”

“And then you broke down! Liza, I just want-”

“No.”

“Liza-”

Angelica was cut off as the door slammed in her face. She let out a long breath and let her forehead rest against the cool wood as she breathed out.

“I’m here for you.” Angelica stated. “For when you can talk to me, I’m here for you.” There was no answer.

In all honestly she hadn’t expected one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So next chapter is very dark


	19. Chapter 19

Alexander crossed his arms and stared up at the hospital. He glanced at Washington who sighed.

“I know.”

“I don’t want to.”

“You have to.”

“No I don’t.”

“Alexander, it’s been nearly a week since you’ve been out and you have to have a check-up.”

“I don’t want to.”

“If you don’t know then you can’t get help.”

“There are some stuff you can’t get help for.”

“Alexander, I-” Washington sighed. “Whatever is wrong, we can get through it. As a group, as a family.”

“You’re not my family.” Alexander glared up at Washington. “My mama is in there.” Alexander pointed to the hospital. “She is my family.”

“Then don’t you want to visit her?” Washington asked. Alexander scowled. “What’s wrong, Alexander?”

“I didn’t manage to protect her.” Alexander admitted quietly. “I- she ended up in a hospital. She didn’t want that. I was meant to keep her out as long as I could.”

“Alexander, you’re still a child. You shouldn’t have been looking after her at all.”

“But she looked after me! And I couldn’t even cope with-”

“Stop.” Washington commanded. Alexander glanced up in fear. “It was amazing when you were keeping up with your schooling and looking after her. What your step-father did to you, no-one expects you to act normally through that.”

“I should have looked after her better.”

“No. You should have accepted help. I want you to accept my help and then we will visit your mother and see how she is.”

“And if- if it’s-” Alexander looked away.

“If it’s AIDs then we will cope with it.”

“It’s not exactly something you can cope with.”

“There are always ways to survive.”

Alexander nodded and sighed.

“Fine.” He trudged into the hospital and Washington smiled softly.

 

Angelica looked up in surprise as Eliza slipped into the room. She sank into one of the seats and stared down at the plate in front of her. Peggy stared at her with wide eyes and then glanced at Angelica.

“Where’s dad?” Eliza asked softly.

“Work.” Peggy muttered.

“Oh.”

“Do you- do you want me to get you a plate?” Angelica asked hopefully. Eliza shrugged. “I-I’ll go get that then.” Eliza turned to watch Angelica leave the room. She then turned back to Peggy who was staring at her nervously.

“H-how are you?”

“Fine.” Eliza murmured.

“You sure?”

“Yeah.”

There was silence for a long moment before Angelica stepped back into the room. Eliza stared at her before she stared down at the plate placed in front of her. She picked up her fork and nudged one of the pieces of pasta around.

“You said he was raped.” Eliza stated. Peggy looked up in surprise and Angelica nodded.

“By his step-father.”

“Only him?”

“No. I- I haven’t watched the videos but I know there was a group several times.”

“Who has watched the videos?”

“Most of the school.” Peggy broke in. “This is- this is Alexander Hamilton?”

“Yeah.”

“And if I- if I talk to him…” Eliza continued to poke at her food. “Will he- will it be here?”

“Yeah. With Aaron or Thomas. Someone to comfort him.”

“Thomas?” Eliza asked in confusion. “I thought they hated each other?”

“Not anymore.” Angelica shrugged. “No-one really understands it. But a lot of people at school are giving him a really hard time.”

“How?”

“George King, he- he keeps on trying to fuck Alexander. I heard- it might just be a rumour, but I heard that yesterday King got him on his knees and- you know- before Thomas intervened.”

“And you think me talking to him will help him?” Eliza asked softly. Angelica nodded.

“He doesn’t have anyone who understands.”

“I didn’t go what he went through.”

“You went through something similar.”

“Will it be similar enough?”

“I don’t know. You’re going to have to talk to him to find out.”

 

Alexander stared at the doctor as he repeated some phrase. Alexander couldn’t make sense of it, it just didn’t make sense.

“It- it was clear?” Alexander asked numbly. The doctor frowned before he nodded. “I’m negative?”

“For HIV, yes.”

“Oh.” Alexander sat back and stared ahead numbly, not understanding. “But- is there something else?”

“Yes. You have chlamydia.”

“Is that- is that curable?”

“Entirely. You need to take antibiotics for two weeks.” The doctor handed Alexander a packet and Alexander let out a long breath. The doctor’s words faded into the background as he realised he didn’t have AIDs. “Alexander?”

“Yeah. I- I’m listening.”

“Okay. Until you have finished this course of treatment it is very important that you don’t have unprotected sex with anyone. From the- injuries you sustained, it is better that you don’t have sex for some time yet but it is vital you don’t have unprotected sex as chlamydia spreads very easily.”

“I- I won’t.” Alexander offered the doctor a weak smile who nodded.

“The rape kit you provided on the day you were admitted to hospital has been processed and we’ve managed to match some of the DNA supplied.”

“Some of?”

“A rape kit works for seventy two hours, Alexander. Do you-” the doctor paused. “Can you tell me how many sets of DNA there would be?”

“How many people fucked me.” Alexander said softly. The doctor nodded. “No. I can’t.” Alexander swallowed down the shame in his throat.

“Your step-father’s has been identified.” The doctor sighed. “So, there is physical evidence against him for his trial.”

“Can I- can I go now?” Alexander glanced at the door. The doctor nodded.

“In three months you’ll need to have a check-up, to make sure that the chlamydia has gone and hasn’t returned but you can have unprotected sex once you have finished the antibiotics.”

“Thank you.” Alexander stood and left the room. Washington looked up from where he was sat.

“What did he say?”

“Not AIDs.” Alexander smiled faintly. “Chlamydia. So it’s- it’s not…”

“It’s curable.”

“Yeah.” Alexander stared down at his feet. “Is there anything more on- do the police have anything more on him?”

“Not yet. You’ll be the first to know. Why?”

“They got his DNA off me. But not-” Alexander shrugged. “Not a complete set of anyone else. It-” Alexander looked away. “Don’t want to talk about it.”

“Okay. Do you want to visit your mother?”

“Do I have to?”

“You’re her next of kin, Alexander. The doctors need someone with that permission. They need to make some serious decisions about her care going forwards.”

“And if I don’t want to?”

“Alexander…” Washington sighed. “You have to.”

“Fine.”

The two walked up the stairs of the hospital until they paused outside the ward. Alexander stared inside and took a deep breath.

“She’s gone, isn’t she?” Alexander asked softly. Washington looked at him in surprise.

“Alexander?”

“I- I’m not stupid.” Alexander mumbled. “Two months?” Alexander scoffed. “I don’t wanna go in there, Washington. I don’t- I don’t want to.”

“You have to.” Washington said softly.

“I whored myself out for her!” Alexander snarled. “I let him beat me and- and degrade me! I let him tie me up and hit me and rape me for her and- and-” Alexander sighed and looked away. “What’s the point? What did I do all that for then?”

“Because he hurt you. It-”

“He held her over my head. If I had any fucking brain I would have run the moment I knew she was- she was-”

“Say it, Alexander.” Washington said softly.

“I already did.”

“It’ll be better if you say it before a doctor does.”

“Fine! My mama’s dead!” Alexander snapped, turning on Washington. “She’s dead and I was used by my step-father who she only fucking married for me! He used both of us and he fucking won! And now nothing will- nothing will-” Washington took a step forwards, to lay a comforting hand on Alexander’s shoulder but Alexander flinched back violently.

His knees crumpled and he hit the floor hard and lay in a tangle of limbs for several long moments. Washington stared down at him, unsure of what to do. Alexander scrubbed at his eyes and Washington felt his heart drop as he realised the broken boy on the floor in front of him was sobbing, unable to control himself.

 

Lafayette knocked gently on Aaron’s door. He waited for a moment before he knocked again.

“Who is it?” Aaron asked through the door.

“Lafayette.” Lafayette murmured through the door. Aaron slowly pulled the door open and stared up at Lafayette nervously. Lafayette felt guilt rise in his gut as he saw the fear obvious in the boy’s eyes.

“Did you want something?” Aaron kept the door almost shut, kept most of his body hidden, safe, behind the door.

“Can I come in?”

There was a beat of silence as Aaron obviously thought it over in his head. He then pushed the door open and Lafayette stepped inside. Aaron immediately made his way across the room and crossed his arms, trying to make himself as small as possible. He didn’t look at Lafayette, staring at the floor instead.

“Aaron, I- I wanted to apologise.”

“It’s fine.”

“Non, non it is not.” Lafayette stepped forwards and Aaron snapped his head up to stare. Lafayette faltered and stopped.

“I-” Aaron looked away and tried to curl in on himself.

“I did not mean to hurt you. Or to- to force you. I- You are nothing like those men. You were just trying to help.”

“I never told you why I did it.” Aaron said softly. Lafayette nodded slowly.

“And I do not think you need to tell me.”

“Why not?”

“Because I was foolish to think you ever intended to harm Alexander. You are closer to him than anyone.”

“He helped me.”

“I know.”

“I didn’t help him.” Aaron admitted softly. He glanced at Lafayette, ashamed. “I didn’t stop him from being raped. Or- or forced into prostitution or- anything. He saved my life.”

“How?”

“What?”

“It is something you have never told me.” Lafayette shrugged. “I am- curious.”

“After my sister ran away, my-”

“You have a sister?” Lafayette asked, shocked. Aaron stared at him for a moment before he nodded.

“My uncle hit both of us and she got tired of it. She ran away and left me. He beat me worse because of it, tried to force me to tell him where she was.”

“Did you know?”

“No. She never told me.” Aaron sighed and uncrossed his arms, letting them hang limply at his sides. “She never even told me she was going. Just- I got back one night and my uncle was furious. He hit me and the next day I told Alexander nothing. Then it kept happening, it got worse and worse until-” Aaron paused and looked away. Lafayette frowned.

“Until what?”

_Chapped lips pressed against his, a tongue delved further and further into his mouth. Then the pressure was removed and he could suck in a desperate breath of air. Aaron stared up in horror at his uncle who stared down with barely concealed- something._

_A something he didn’t want to consider._

“He strangled me until I passed out. Wrapped- wrapped a piece of w-rope around my neck.” Aaron lifted a hand to his neck before he dropped it again. “I couldn’t move.”

_“If you’re going to be such an ungrateful bitch let’s treat you like one.” His uncle hissed as he released Aaron. Aaron slumped down and tried to suck in a breath. Before he could, there was something cold and thin around his neck. It dragged him back, towards the bed._

_He struggled but couldn’t stop the wire that cut into his throat if he so much as shifted. When half of it was wrapped securely around one of the bedposts he scrabbled at his neck, the blood dribbling down and coating his naked chest._

“In the morning he let me go.” Aaron said softly. “He didn’t apologise or- or do anything like that. He just told me that I needed to obey him. That next time I needed to do better. Then he handed me a scarf so he wouldn’t be found out.”

_Aaron hadn’t stopped crying through the night as he felt the warmth from his uncle sleeping in the bed above him. He knew the point of this punishment, knew that he just had to crawl in there with him and he wouldn’t hurt anymore._

_He also knew he’d rather die._

“I am- I am so sorry.” Lafayette looked away. “I- when you arrived I was not kind to you, I know. I know that I was- I was scared of what adding another child would mean. I wished- I wished for you to go back.” Aaron flinched at that thought and Lafayette opened his mouth to correct himself.

Nothing came out.

_“Tonight we’re going to try again.” His uncle snarled as he slowly uncurled the wire from around Aaron’s swollen throat. It stuck and hurt so badly coming off. Aaron didn’t dare make a noise, not even as fresh blood dribbled down his front. “And I’m not going to stop.” His uncle’s hands paused and cupped Aaron’s face. He kissed Aaron deeply, ignoring the hot tears. “I’m never going to stop.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that the scene in the hospital is lacking. I know that it feels weak and that Alexander's loss should be shown better. I understand all this. Those of you that followed Voiceless Symphonies know that I had a break halfway through and a chapter to explain that. I uploaded that chapter early in the morning after me and my family had been called into hospital for my grandmother. She died later that day.  
> I am not used to working around triggers, I typically don't have them. However when I wrote this chapter I found out that apparently I do. It's weak because I couldn't bring myself to write it better. The rest of the fic with Alexander mourning will also be weak because I literally cannot express these feelings without breaking down and therefore not writing. Please don't ask why or complain. I know it's shit but I cannot stop that.  
> I also want to thank, once more, the people who left those comments on VS. It was a terrible day and I cannot say that the comments stopped it being that but they helped on the day and in the aftermath. They all made such an enormous difference to me even if I was in no mental shape to reply to them.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to thank everyone who left me nice messages on the last chapter. I don't want to get too deep into my personal issues on here cause I know that's not why people read my fics and it shouldn't be. Just know that it's something I will eventually overcome and for all of the people who had also lost someone close to them I hope you get the help you need.

Alexander stumbled back into the house, tears streaming down his face. Washington closed the door behind him and watched as he ran up the stairs. He crashed into his room and stared at the opposite wall for a long moment.

For the first time since everything had started, anger came over him, an anger so pure and powerful that nothing, not even his own logic, could overpower it. He let out a scream, a scream so raw and primal that it hurt his throat and ears in equal measure.

He grabbed for his phone and threw it across the room. When that didn’t do anything he grabbed for his bag. He threw his textbook the length of the room and took that same satisfaction in the way it crashed against the wall and flopped onto the floor, at the way he destroyed it. He took the water bottle and did the same. A crack appeared in it and Alexander strode across the room and grabbed the bottle again and threw it, again and again until half of it snapped and the next time Alexander threw it, scarlet blood appeared across the wall.

“ALEXANDER!”

Alexander grabbed for the broken plastic again but a hand got there faster and grabbed the remains of the water bottle away. Alexander turned on that person and pulled his fists back, hitting whoever it was, not caring, not thinking.

He felt something break under his fists and a sharp cry of pain. Then arms were around him and he was being pulled back. He fought against it, spitting and hissing like some kind of animal, but nothing stopped it. The fight against whoever was holding him was short as the person pinned him against the wall, as gently as they could.

Alexander thrashed and tried to break free but almost as quickly as the anger had hit him it vanished. He collapsed to his knees, only vaguely supported by whoever it was holding him, and began to sob.

The hands holding him released him and he felt all strength leave him. His sobs quietened to almost nothing as he just lay still, curled up in a ball. It seemed like a lifetime until something soft was handed to him. He curled it into his hands and brought it to rest against his cheek. He opened his eyes and stared down at the dark red fabric through teary eyes.

“Aaron?” Alexander mumbled.

“I’m here.” Aaron said softly.

“She’s dead.” Alexander whispered. “A massive stroke. Two months ago. I- I never even knew.”

“Oh, Alexander.” Aaron sighed and pulled the boy into a tight hug. Alexander didn’t return the hug but leant into it.

“She’s been brain dead while that monster raped me. I didn’t even know.”

“You hurt your hand, Alexander.” Aaron said softly. “Can you let us clean it up?”

“I deserve it.”

“No you don’t.”

“I should have seen it.”

“You’re not a doctor. You’re a child who’s under far too much stress.” Aaron slowly pulled back and wiped away at the tears on Alexander’s face. Alexander smiled faintly. He then frowned as he saw that Aaron’s nose was bleeding.

“What happened?” Alexander asked as he stared. Aaron looked away and sighed.

“Come on, you need to get your hand cleaned.”

“Aaron-”

“It’s fine.” Aaron pulled Alexander close for a second before he released him and stood shakily. Alexander stared around the room as he did. No-one else was there but the room was a mess. There were books scattered across the room, some with pages ripped out, some with their spines broken. He could see blood splattered against the wall and dents in it.

“Did I do this?” Alexander asked softly. Aaron sighed before he nodded. “Oh.”

“Come on.” Aaron gently took Alexander’s undamaged hand and led him from the room. Outside stood Washington, Martha and Lafayette. Aaron paused for a moment before he steeled himself. “Martha, could you please look after Alexander while we clean up.”

“Stay.” Alexander mumbled quietly, He tugged on Aaron’s sleeve who nodded.

“Of course.”

 

Lafayette stared at the room in front of him numbly.

“How could Alexander do this?” He asked softly.

“It wasn’t him, Lafayette. Not really. He’s almost definitely got some form of PTSD. It’s- it’s quite normal for individuals with PTSD to lash out.”

“But this?”

“Lafayette, we need to-” Washington paused as his phone buzzed. He pulled it out of his pocket and frowned down at it. “Wait here a moment.”

“Who is it?”

“The police.”

 

Alexander stared down at his hand, almost not understanding as Martha pulled out a strip of plastic. More blood bubbled to the top and he stared as it dripped onto the wooden floor.

“Should it be bleeding that much?” Aaron asked, staring at the hand nervously. Martha sighed.

“It should be okay. I’d like to get him into a hospital so I can do a scan, just to make sure there’s no nerve damage, but I don’t think that’s going to happen.”

Aaron glanced at Alexander’s blank face and sighed.

“No, I don’t think so.”

“He needs to see a therapist.” Martha sighed. “There’s only so much he can cope with and if this- if this is how he deals with grief then…”

“He doesn’t have anyone else to lose.” Aaron muttered. “His brother’s dead. His father abandoned him. His step-father-” Aaron scoffed and shook his head. “His mother was all the family he had left.”

“He still needs more than I can provide for him. I can only patch up his physical injuries.” Martha shook her head. “None of this should have happened to him.”

Aaron ran gentle fingers over Alexander’s hand. Alexander didn’t seem connected to the world and Aaron felt his stomach drop.

“It shouldn’t have happened.”

 

Washington stared down at the phone with astonishment on his face. Lafayette looked up at him.

“What is it?”

“They found him.”

“Who?”

“The police found John Adams. They found Alexander’s step-father!”

 

Thomas lay on his bed with his eyes closed, trying his hardest to get to sleep. Nothing was working. He had a thousand questions he needed answering and he needed Alexander there to answer him. Angelica had been less than comforting in what she’d passed on and Lafayette wasn’t responding to his texts.

Thomas groaned and rolled onto his side and grabbed for his phone.

**From: King**

**They’re gonna fucking kick me out of school for this!**

**From: King**

**Why’s everyone so attached to this slut Tommy? He’s not even that good**

Thomas felt anger build in him but he forced himself to take a deep breath.

**To: King**

**Fuck off**

**From: King**

**Come on Tommy what’s wrong?**

**To: King**

**I don’t want anything to do with you if you’re gonna hurt Alexander like that**

**From: King**

**Why not?**

**To: King**

**Because he’s just a 17 year old who’s been fucking raped! And you’re intent on making him into some kind of whore!**

**From: King**

**Raped?**

Thomas groaned and closed his eyes. He wasn’t meant to tell King that. He wasn’t meant to tell anyone that. Plenty of people had guessed but there were others, like King, who refused to believe it.

**To: King**

**It doesn’t matter**

**From: King**

**You mean to tell me he didn’t want those men on him?**

**To: King**

**Please don’t tell anyone else, George. I’m not even really meant to know**

Thomas stared at the phone and nothing appeared. He groaned and lay back on the bed. He was surprised when his phone buzzed again.

**From: Angel**

**Eliza wants to talk to Alexander**

**To: Angel**

**Why?**

**From: Angel**

**About what happened to her**

**To: Angel**

**You think it’ll help them?**

**From: Angel**

**We can only hope**

**To: Angel**

**Has she seen a therapist yet?**

**From: Angel**

**No. Has he?**

**To: Angel**

**I don’t think so but I’m not sure**

**From: Angel**

**This is such a mess, Thomas**

**To: Angel**

**Eliza will get better**

**From: Angel**

**How can she?**

**To: Angel**

**The police have any leads?**

**From: Angel**

**Nothing**

**To: Angel**

**They will**

**From: Angel**

**I want you to be there for Eliza. She won’t talk to me about it and she won’t allow any of Alexander’s friends there. She says she’ll let you**

**To: Angel**

**If it helps Eliza then I’ll do it**

**From: Angel**

**Thank you**

 

Alexander snapped his head up, instantly focused as the door opened. He slipped his hands out of their protective grips and shoved them close to him as Washington stepped in. Washington paused in the doorway.

“The police rang me, Alexander. They’ve found your step-father.”

“What?” Alexander stared at Washington, fear written across his face. “I- I don’t- what?”

“They’ve found him. He’s in prison right now and they’re going to start the trial process as soon as possible.”

“When will it be?” Aaron asked, standing.

“They have to see if he deserves bail.”

“Bail?” Alexander stared at Washington. “He might- he might get out?”

“No. I doubt it, anyway. Even if he does then there’s no-one to pay his bail and-”

“He has money.” Alexander whispered. “From- from me. He took half the profits and then- then my half as well and- he has money, Washington! He- he could get out!”

“Alexander, calm down.” Aaron said softly. He stepped in front of Alexander and laid a gentle hand on Alexander’s shoulder. “We’d get a restraining order. He’s been out all this time and he hasn’t tried to touch you. He hasn’t been in contact with you at all. He…” Aaron trailed off as Alexander looked down. “Alexander?”

“He’s been texting me.” Alexander admitted softly. Aaron sighed.

“Saying what?”

Lafayette handed Alexander his phone and Alexander tried not to notice the crack down the middle of it. He must have thrown it. He unlocked it and turned the phone to Aaron. Aaron scowled.

**From: Unknown Number**

**You know they’ll get tired of you, bastard. Then they’ll use you until you break and throw you aside**

**From: Unknown Number**

**How long until you come crawling back to me on your knees begging for me?**

**From: Unknown Number**

**The longer you stay away from me the worse your punishment is going to be**

**From: Unknown Number**

**Answer me, whore**

**To: Unknown Number**

**What do you want?**

**From: Unknown Number**

**I want you back**

**From: Unknown Number**

**Even if they find me you won’t get away. There’s always people who want something like you**

“Why didn’t you tell anyone?” Aaron asked softly. Alexander shrugged. “Did you believe them?” Alexander stared at his feet and Aaron sighed. “He’s wrong, Alexander. All of this, it’s wrong.”

“I’m scared.” Alexander admitted quietly. “What if- what if he hurts me again?”

“I won’t let him.” Aaron promised. “I’ll never let them hurt you again.” Aaron pulled him into a tight hug and Alexander finally returned it, letting his arms encircle Aaron and let his head rest on the taller boy’s shoulder. “Never.”


	21. Chapter 21

Thomas knocked on the door and waited for a moment. Lafayette appeared in the doorway and smiled at Thomas.

“Thomas.”

“Is Alexander here?”

“Why?”

“Um.” Thomas bit down on his lower lip. “You know Angelica Schuyler? Well she- she wants to talk to him. Wanted me to bring him to her house.”

“Why?”

“It’s personal, Gil. I- I can’t tell you.”

“Alexander received some very upsetting news yesterday. I do not think it would be good for him to leave.”

“Can we ask him?”

“Fine.” Lafayette huffed and strode into the house. Thomas followed after him and looked around. They ascended the stairs and paused outside one of the guest rooms. Lafayette then knocked on the door. “Alexander?”

“What?” Alexander asked in a groan through the door.

“Thomas is here to see you.”

There was silence for a long moment before the door opened and Alexander stood there. Thomas stared at him for a moment before he looked away. The boy had obviously just risen. His hair was lying around his shoulders, in that scruffy way it had. He was wearing a red hoodie that looked several sizes too big and was staring up at Thomas with that guarded look that never seemed to leave his eyes anymore.

“Thomas.” Alexander stated. Thomas offered a weak smile as he noticed how the boy’s eyes were rimmed red.

“I- Angelica mentioned how she needed help, right?”

“Yeah…”

“Well… I’m- I’m here to bring you to the person. If- if this is a good time?”

“It’s a shit time.” Alexander stated.

“Oh. Sorry, I can-”

“There’s not gonna be a good time.” Alexander crossed his arms and Thomas caught sight of a white bandage. “So give me like five minutes and I’ll be ready to go.”

“Mon ami-”

“Laf, can you keep him company until then?” Alexander closed the door and Thomas turned to Lafayette.

“Is he okay?”

“Not really.” Lafayette sighed. “His mother was taken off life support last night.”

“Holy shit.” Thomas stared at the door. “This can- this can wait. I mean-”

“If he wants to then it shouldn’t.” Thomas jumped at the new voice and turned around to see Aaron stood behind him. “If it’s what he wants.” Aaron also looked exhausted and he was wearing short sleeves. Thomas stared at the long bandage covering most of one of his forearms.

“What happened?”

“Got a bad burn.” Aaron shrugged. “I’m surprised you’re here this early.”

“I uh- Angelica was up for most of the night. Helping this- person.”

“Well, if you think it’ll help him, then good luck.” Aaron nodded at them before he walked down the stairs. Lafayette stared after him with a sad look.

“Is something wrong?” Thomas asked. Lafayette sighed.

“I am- I did something stupid and Aaron paid for my mistake. It is something that will take time to heal and I cannot speed it up.”

 

Alexander and Thomas sat in the car in absolute silence. Alexander was picking at the edges of his bandages wrapped around his hand.

“So what happened?”

“I put a glass down.”

“You put a glass down with a lot of force.” Thomas commented. Alexander stared at him for a moment before he shrugged.

“I had a pretty shit night.”

“Want to talk about it?”

“No.”

“Okay. But if you- if you change your mind, then I’m here.”

“Yeah. Thanks. For- for everything.”

“It’s the least I can do.”

“How do you mean?”

“I’ve been- I dunno, Alexander. Talking to King, I just- I just wonder how differently this could have turned out, how badly I could have hurt you.”

“I kissed you.” Alexander stated. Thomas nodded slowly. “You could have done anything to me, Thomas. God, you could have done anything to me the first day you found out. If- if you’d blackmailed me- if you’d said the only way to keep them hidden was for me to sleep with you then I would have been on my knees in a second.” Alexander stared out the window with a defeated slump to his shoulders.

“I don’t know if I would have turned that down.” Thomas admitted quietly. “You- you’ve been through so much and I don’t want you to go through anything more but what if- what if I don’t control myself?”

“Then you fuck me.” Alexander shrugged and Thomas stared at him, wide-eyed. “Not like you’d be the first.”

“Alexander-”

“Look me in the eye and tell me that you got off on those videos.” Alexander stared at Thomas. “That you liked seeing me crying and begging to be released. Tell me.”

“I can’t.”

“Do you really think you’d be able to rape me then?” Alexander brought his feet to rest on the seat and placed his chin on his knees. “I’m not some kind of helpless kitten. I- I can defend myself.”

“I’m just worried you wouldn’t. That-” Thomas broke off as Alexander leant over and kissed his cheek gently. Alexander then retreated to the far side of the car. Thomas stared at him, eyes wide. “What-”

“I can make my own choices.” Alexander stared out the window, not even glancing at Thomas. “I can- I can decide.”

“That doesn’t mean you have to choose me.” Thomas said softly. Alexander looked confused for a moment before he scowled.

“Why did you find me? How did you find me? It was a matter of time but the internet’s fucking huge. How come you stumbled across the one website that had me and the one website that had me doing that?”

“I-” Thomas sighed and focused on the road for a moment. “It’s a long story, Alexander. Longer than the rest of this journey and I don’t want it to be interrupted. I can tell you on the drive back or- or some other time.”

Alexander nodded and let out a breath.

“For what it’s worth I don’t think you could rape me.” Alexander said softly. “If I did I wouldn’t be in this car with you.”

 

When they pulled up to the Schuyler manor Alexander let out a long breath. He then stepped out of the car.

“Do I get to know who it is?”

“I- I think Angelica would prefer you not to know until the last moment. It’s a girl and she- she won’t hurt you but- yeah.”

“’Kay.” Alexander stepped forwards and crossed his arms. He looked too small and it hurt something in Thomas to see him like that. He was still so thin, still so weak looking. Thomas pushed past the feeling and strode up to ring the doorbell. In moments Peggy appeared. She stared at Thomas for a moment before she smiled up at him. The smile faltered and vanished as she took in Alexander.

“Alexander?” Peggy asked. Alexander nodded. “Nice to meet you!” She held out her hand and Alexander stared at it for a moment before he spoke.

“You too.” He didn’t even try to take the hand.

“Let’s continue this inside.” Thomas said softly. Peggy let her hand drop and she nodded.

“Follow me.” The three made their way inside. The moment the door closed, Alexander jumped slightly and stared around. Thomas laid a gentle hand on his shoulder which Alexander shrugged off. Thomas tried not to feel offended.

They made their way into a small room with a sofa and a comfortable chair. Bookcases lined the walls and Alexander paused in the doorway, just staring.

Then his gaze was drawn to the two teenagers on the sofa.

“Eliza?” Alexander asked softly. Eliza stared up at him and nodded, with a weak smile. Alexander sank into the chair, keeping his distance from the girl. Eliza watched him nervously. “I guess you’re who they want me to talk to?”

“Yeah.”

“Probably about the fact I haven’t seen you in school for over a month?”

“Yeah.” Eliza glanced at Angelica who sighed.

“You want me to go?”

“You- you’ll be just outside?”

“I swear, I’ll be there.”

“And Tommy’ll stay?”

“I will. Anyway, Alexander won’t hurt you. I know that.”

Eliza slowly nodded and Angelica pressed a light kiss to her temple before she rose and left the room. Peggy followed her and they closed the door with a definitive clink. Alexander then turned to stare at Eliza.

“So…” Alexander began to toy with his bandage again and Eliza stared at it.

“What’s that from?”

“I cut my hand.”

“Self-harm?” Eliza’s voice was too flat, too non-judgemental. Alexander sighed.

“Not- really.”

“Oh.” Eliza pulled down her sleeve and Thomas gasped. Her skin was covered in angry red lines, some still bleeding while others were scabbed and on their way to scarring. Alexander stared at them for a moment.

“I threw a water bottle against the wall until it cracked. I kept doing it and ignored when it cut into my skin.” Alexander admitted. Thomas turned to stare at him and forced himself to remain quiet. He was there to comfort them if needed, not interrupt. “I also broke a lot of my books. First time I got angry since- since…”

“I know what happened to you. The basics anyway. That your- your step-father blackmailed you into making porn videos and- and that-” Eliza looked away and Alexander nodded.

“He raped me. He released the videos to everyone at school. I’m infamous as the school’s slut.” Alexander pressed his thumb into the palm of his hand, ignoring the wave of pain. He had to take a moment to gather himself before he spoke again. “I- no-one even told me your name until I arrived here. I don’t know anything.”

“I was walking home from school.” Eliza stared at the wall in front of her. “And this man- he- he asked- he said something to me and sent me down an alley. Said there was someone there, someone hurt. I had to help and then- then…”

“You were raped.” Alexander said softly. Eliza stared up at the ceiling and it took Alexander a moment to realise she was blinking away tears.

“I was blindfolded and- and I don’t know how many men-” Eliza brushed at her eyes and sniffed. “More than two.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I didn’t tell anyone. I burned my clothes and- and I scrubbed myself with bleach.” Eliza lifted up her T-shirt and Alexander stared at the remnants of chemical burns. “I just wanted to forget it but I couldn’t. I- I never could. I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t eat, I- I wasn’t functioning. I wanted to- to-”

“To kill yourself.” Alexander said softly. Eliza stared at him and nodded. “I nearly- I-” Alexander let out a breath. “They hurt me. They- they treated me like a dog and-” Alexander looked away and sighed. “They forced me to show the world everything, they forced me to fuck strangers just so I could- just so I could get them money. So I could get them off.”

“Alexander, you don’t have to-” Thomas stared.

“Yes I fucking do!” Alexander snapped. “I can’t let them- I can’t let him fucking control me! I- I need this to- to…” Alexander trailed off, looking lost.

“Have you heard information from the police?”

“They found him last night.” Alexander said softly. “Too late. Too fucking late.”

“They’ll never find my r- my attackers.” Eliza murmured. “He- they got- they got away with it. And they’re going to do it again. They’re going to hurt more people and I just- I just can’t stop it. I can’t do anything.”

“I’m sorry.”

Eliza chuckled gently and Alexander frowned.

“You- you’re the first one who- I mean everyone says that. The- the doctors when I committed. The nurses at the mental hospital. The policemen. But you- it feels real.” Eliza wiped at her cheeks. “It feels real when you say it.”


	22. Chapter 22

Alexander stayed in the room with Eliza for over an hour. There came a natural stopping point in their conversation as they just stared at each other. Not as frightened as they’d been at first, just knowing they had both gone through the same thing, had both been hurt in such a personal and permanent way.

“I think I’ll get some food, if that’s okay?” Thomas glanced between the two who nodded slowly. He left the room and Eliza slowly turned to Alexander.

“They didn’t use my mouth.” Eliza said softly. “They put a gag in.”

“They did everything.” Alexander stared down at his bandaged hand. “Every kinky sex thing they could think of. I don’t- I don’t even know if- before this, I was bi but now I don’t even know.”

“The thought of sex it just-” Eliza shook her head. “And it didn’t used to.”

“Do you reckon there are people to help with that?”

“There has to be, right?” Eliza shifted nervously. “I wouldn’t want to talk about it with someone who didn’t- someone who didn’t get it.”

“I guess that’s why Thomas is out of the room.”

“Yeah.” Eliza glanced up at Alexander nervously. “I can’t let my sisters hug me anymore. It- it reminds me.”

“Laf keeps on touching my hair. I don’t know how to tell him to stop.”

“Why don’t you like it?”

“They dragged me around by my hair.”

“Why don’t you cut it?” Eliza gestured to her own short hair. Alexander stared at it for a moment, it was choppy and messy and he was sure she’d done it herself.

“I don’t want them to have won. I- I like my hair. And if I cut it off for them then…”

“They haven’t won.” Eliza shifted forwards and slowly walked to sit next to Alexander. Alexander stared at her with bated breath. “We’re still here, aren’t we?”

“I don’t know.” Alexander whispered. “I don’t know how much of me they left behind.”

“Alexander-” Before Eliza could say anything more, the door opened. In an instant she was sat back where she had been sitting, knees curled up to her chin as she stared at the door. Thomas stepped in with Angelica close behind. Thomas held a plate of sandwiches while Angelica held three cups and a jug of water.

“I, uh-” Angelica paused in the doorway. She looked so nervous, so unlike Angelica. “I wondered if you two wanted some company while you ate?” Angelica didn’t stop staring at Eliza who was staring down at her nails, picking at the cuticles.

“Okay.” Eliza said softly. Angelica stared at her for a moment before she grinned.

“Re-really?”

“Yeah.” Eliza shifted on the sofa, leaving two of the seats clear. Angelica sank into the furthest seat and smiled at her sister who managed a small smile back. Eliza reached for one of the sandwiches and opened it, staring down at it, before she slowly raised it to her mouth. Angelica tried not to stare as she did so.

Alexander took one of the sandwiches and held it in his hand, making no move to actually eat it. Thomas and Angelica started to talk quietly between themselves.

“Can we do this next week?” Eliza asked softly. Angelica stared at her in surprise.

“You- you want to talk to Alexander again?”

“If he’s okay with it.” Eliza stared at Alexander who slowly nodded.

“Sounds good.” Alexander smiled softly at Eliza. Angelica stared at Alexander for several moments before she slowly forced a smile onto her face. This stranger could help her sister more than she could.

Angelica tried not to feel the helplessness bubbling in her chest.

 

Alexander stared out the window, tapping his finger against the windowsill. Thomas glanced at him and smiled. The teenager looked more relaxed than he had in a long time. Doing something was probably the best thing for him.

Thomas almost felt bad dropping him off. He wasn’t sure if that was because he didn’t want the boy to just do nothing or if he didn’t want to leave Alexander.

“So why aren’t you eating?” Thomas asked softly. Alexander tensed and glanced at him. “Just- just asking.”

“Dunno. Don’t really want to.”

“Not any- any other reason?”

“Don’t wanna talk about it.”

“Okay. But just- just know that I’m here for you. So’s Gil and Aaron and the sisters and your friends. We’re not going to hurt you.”

“I know.”

“Then…”

“I’m not hungry.” Alexander shrugged helplessly. “I know I should be. I know- I know that it might get dangerous soon but I just- I just can’t force myself to eat. Nothing appeals to me.”

“How much are you eating?”

“A sandwich every other day?”

“Fuck.” Thomas muttered. “That’s- that’s not a lot at all.”

“I know.”

“Have you brought it up with your therapist?”

Alexander was silent for a while and Thomas sighed.

“Of course.”

“When did Eliza get attacked?”

“About three and a half months ago.”

“And she’s still…” Alexander trailed off and Thomas frowned.

“For the first month she didn’t tell anyone. She overworked herself, she starved herself, she broke down. Then she spent the next two months in a psychiatric hospital.”

“Why?”

“Because she rang me at two in the morning and begged me to come get her.”

“From where?”

“From the top of a parking garage.” Thomas stared straight ahead and Alexander stared at him in a mix of fear and something else.

“Wow.”

“She- I arrived and managed to calm her down enough to agree to book herself into a hospital. They- she didn’t admit that she’d been raped for weeks. I’m not saying that Eliza went through the same thing that you did but she- she went through something terrible, Alexander.” Thomas glanced down at Alexander who stared back.

“I know.”

“And I know that her sisters would do anything for her.”

“They’re close?”

“Very. Their mother died in childbirth to Pegs, the youngest, so they just stuck together through everything. Their father isn’t taking this too well. He doesn’t know how to help Eliza and- and that’s difficult.”

“She’s really strong.” Alexander began to pick at his nails and Thomas had to suppress the urge to bat his fingers away. “Don’t think many people would be able to go through something like that and just- just get back to normal.”

“You- you do realise that’s not normal, right? Eliza isn’t normally a shut-in. She’s not normally afraid of her own shadow. She’s- she’s scared, Alexander. And she- I didn’t know she was still self-harming to be honest.”

“It’s common in cases of abuse.” Alexander tugged at his bandage for a moment before he went back to his nails. “Especially sexual.” Thomas set a light hand over Alexander’s hands, forcing the teenager to freeze. Alexander stared up at him, something scared in his eyes. Thomas didn’t even glance at him, focused on the road.

“Doesn’t mean it’s right.” Thomas said softly. Alexander’s hands fell still under his.

 

Hercules lay on the sofa, book raised above his head as he tried to concentrate. He would still have to attend school come Monday. He would somehow need to focus on lessons as he knew Alexander was home alone.

A knock came at the door and Hercules glanced up. James slipped into the room and Hercules stared at him for a moment.

“You do know you live here, right?”

“Yeah. I just-” James sank down onto one of the other chairs and sighed. “Thomas told me a bit about what’s going on with Alexander.”

“How much?”

“That he knew about the videos before anyone else. That- that he was being abused.”

“Yeah.”

“I- look, I used to be friends with the guy. I don’t- I don’t like seeing him like this. Is there anything I can do to help?”

“No. There- there’s nothing.”

“He’s getting a lot of shit at school. It’s not gonna get better, Herc.”

“If we told them he was raped do you reckon that would change anything?”

“I don’t know. People like Thomas and me, sure. People like King? I don’t think so. He pisses people off for fun, Herc. He makes enemies and that’s just who he is. I-”

“He doesn’t anymore.” Hercules sighed and put the book down. “You haven’t spent that much time around him but he- he just doesn’t anymore. If there’s anything even the slightest bit of confrontation he just folds. It’s terrifying.”

“He’ll get better though, right?”

“I don’t know.” Hercules answered honestly. “I- I just don’t know.”

 

“Will I have to see him again?” Alexander asked softly at dinner. Everyone glanced at him before Washington spoke up.

“See who?”

“At the trial. Will I have to see him?” Alexander didn’t look up at Washington, just stared down at his full plate.

“Maybe.”

“I don’t want to.” Alexander said weakly. “I don’t- I don’t know if- if I can tell someone what he did to me while I know he’s- he’s so…”

“He won’t be able to touch you.” Aaron said softly. “And I’ll be right next to you. Remember my trial?”

“But it wasn’t the same.”

“You’re right but I’ll be there for you all the same.”

“If he laughs at me then-” Alexander pushed his food away and hunched over. “Or if he tells them about- about-”

“Whatever he says or does is on him.” Aaron slipped a hand into Alexander’s and squeezed gently. “No-one will judge you.”

“But they will! They- they’ll all be- be looking at me and wondering if I’m just a- a ten dollar-”

“You’re not.” Lafayette interrupted before Alexander could finish his sentence. “You are not what those men told you you are and you are especially not that. You are wonderful, Alexander and-”

“And a fucking ten dollar whore!” Alexander spat out. “And he’ll tell the court that and- and then-”

“And then they’ll put him in federal prison for child rape.” Aaron said softly. Alexander glanced down at him in surprise. “And for forcing you into prostitution. And-”

“He didn’t do that.” Alexander whispered. Aaron frowned.

“What?”

“He- he wanted me for himself.” Alexander sniffed and stared down at the table. “He wanted me to- he said he didn’t even like me going to school. Wanted his slut around all the time.” Alexander wiped his nose and then crossed his arm. “He filmed me but I- I don’t think he would have ever sold me.”

“He didn’t even know about it?” Washington asked, confused.

“Not until he broke my arm. That’s why he did it.” Alexander shrugged. “He walked in on someone- and so he got mad. Told them to finish and then told me to talk to him. He beat me and I didn’t think he would stop.” Alexander wiped at his eyes as tears began to trickle down. Aaron put a gentle arm around him and Alexander leant into it.

“He was wrong to do that.” Aaron whispered. Alexander shrugged.

“I got paid that night. Then he- he locked me in that box and when he got me out he raped me and it hurt and-” Alexander sucked in a shuddering breath and stood abruptly. “I don’t want to see him again. I- I never want to see him!”

“I’ll see what I can do.” Washington said softly. Alexander nodded slowly.

“Thank you.”

With that, Alexander turned and left the room. His plate remained, just as it had the night before, untouched.


	23. Chapter 23

Alexander lay in bed for a long time after he heard everyone leave the house on Monday. He had nothing to motivate him to get out of bed, no reason he shouldn’t just stay there forever.

At lunch his stomach growled and he groaned. He didn’t want to get up. He didn’t want to admit to the world that he existed. Instead of trying to get up he reached for his phone.

**From: Laffy Taffy**

**You okay?**

**From: Hercules**

**School’s quiet without you**

**From: John**

**King isn’t in school :D**

**From: Angelica**

**Eliza actually managed to come with us for breakfast. Thank you**

**From: Peggy**

**Do you like muffins?**

Alexander stared at that one in confusion. He hadn’t even been aware he had Peggy’s contact information.

**To: Peggy**

**I guess?**

**From: Peggy**

**Good. Laf’s gonna bring some home. Eliza made them last night**

Alexander smiled softly at that and switched conversations.

**To: Betsey**

**You made me muffins?**

**From: Betsey**

**I made muffins. If some of them happen to end up with you that’s not my fault**

**To: Betsey**

**Now I need to get you a gift**

**From: Betsey**

**It’s fine Alexander. You did a lot for me on Saturday**

**To: Betsey**

**Wish I could’ve done more**

**From: Betsey**

**You did more than enough**

 

The funeral was nearly two weeks after Adams was arrested. Alexander wasn’t sure why it took so long to organise but it did. On the day, he stared into the mirror and was ashamed at what stared back.

His body was gaunt, a side effect of not being able to eat anything more than a few bites. The antibiotics had made sure that the STD hadn’t been able to spread or hurt him but even thinking about the pills on his desk made his stomach drop.

He was a slut, a slut who was infected.

His hair was tied up in a loose ponytail, letting his neck be covered by at least a slight warmth. His arm was long out of its cast, almost healed. On some days it still hurt but in general it was fine.

That day, it wouldn’t stop hurting.

 

Thomas stared at Alexander who looked numbly down at the gravestone. There was still a crowd of people but they were beginning to dissipate. Aaron had tried to comfort Alexander but he’d been pushed away. Alexander stood alone.

“Thomas?” Washington asked. Thomas looked up.

“Hello, Mr Washington.”

“Just Washington is fine. We’re not in school, after all.”

“Of course.” Thomas stared at Alexander again who was wiping tears from his eyes. “Is he okay?”

“I don’t think there’s an easy answer to that.” Washington sighed. “I think he will be.”

“But not anytime soon.”

“I appreciate the time you’ve spent with him.” Washington said softly. “I know there are things you could be doing instead.”

“He’s my friend. And he’s having a bad time. I’m not just going to leave him.”

“Even so, you’ve gone above and beyond what most friends are willing to do.”

“I-” Thomas paused as he saw a man approaching Alexander. The man laid a comforting hand on Alexander’s shoulder and leant in to talk. Alexander tensed and set his jaw angrily but made no move to get the man off him. “Who’s that?” Thomas asked, pointing to the man. Washington glanced over and frowned.

“I’m… not sure.”

“He looks familiar.” Thomas muttered. As he watched, the man began to walk away and Alexander followed. Thomas frowned at that in confusion. “Stay here a moment.” He muttered to Washington. He wanted to know who could interrupt Alexander’s mourning, something that none of Alexander’s friends could do.

Thomas quickly walked across the graveyard. He slowed as he reached earshot of the two.

“James, please.” Alexander said softly. He sounded wrecked. “Just- just let me grieve my mother.”

“But we need to talk about our arrangement going forward.”

“Please, can we just-”

“Alexander!” Thomas called. Alexander turned and the pure relief that washed over his face made something settle uncomfortably in Thomas’ stomach. The man paused before he let his hand drop.

“Well, I have your number. I’ll talk to you later. I truly am sorry about your mother.”

“Th-thank you.” Alexander mumbled. He walked over to Thomas quickly and brought him into a tight hug. Thomas let out a small sound of surprise as Alexander buried his face into the crook of Thomas’ neck.

“Hey, it’s okay.” Thomas muttered. Alexander was still so averse to physical contact, normally only getting it from Eliza or Aaron. Thomas didn’t remember the last time he had hugged Alexander, wasn’t even sure if it had ever happened. “You’re okay.”

“She’s gone.” Alexander whispered. Thomas sighed and nodded, knowing that Alexander would be unable to see it. “I’m glad she never saw me like this.” Alexander admitted, even quieter, if that was possible.

“She would be proud. She would be proud that you got help and that you’re recovering.” Thomas pulled back slightly and stared down at Alexander. He looked like he was about to collapse and Thomas had to wonder just how much he was recovering. “She would be proud.”

“Thank you for coming to find me.” Alexander murmured.

“Who was that man?”

“An old… friend.”

Thomas decided not to pick up on the pause. Instead he just nodded and began to direct Alexander back to Washington.

“Can you- can you come with me?”

“Of course.”

“I don’t wanna be alone.” Alexander leant against Thomas and the taller teenager sighed.

“You’re not. You’re never alone, Alexander.”

 

“You’re going back to school?” Alexander asked in surprise. Eliza nodded slowly.

“I’m not good at working from home. I- it just doesn’t work for me.”

“School’s got a lot of people.”

“When are you going back?”

“Dunno.” Alexander breathed out a sigh. “I could- I could just finish the year online but then…”

“Uni.” Thomas supplied. Alexander nodded slowly.

“I wanted to be a lawyer. Before all this. Now I- I don’t know.”

“I want to be a social worker.” Eliza supplied softly. “I want to- to help kids like us.”

“The fucked up ones.” Alexander grinned and Eliza rolled her eyes. She leant her head against his shoulder and he took her hand. Thomas stared at them for a long moment. Three weeks since they’d started these sessions, two or three sessions a week, and the effect was incredible.

They weren’t healed, far from it, but Alexander didn’t jump as much as he used to, wasn’t constantly looking over his shoulder. Eliza had started eating again.

“Thomas,” Eliza asked softly. “Could you- could you leave the room? For a- just for a bit.”

“Um, Alexander?”

“Sure.” Alexander stared at Eliza in confusion. They all knew that Alexander and Eliza had conversations when Thomas was out of the room, conversations that Thomas was never privy to but they didn’t normally kick him out so blatantly.

“I’ll be just outside.” Thomas promised as he stood and left the room.

“What’s up?” Alexander asked, pulling himself away from Eliza slightly. She sighed and sat cross legged on the sofa. Alexander matched the posture and stared at her. She didn’t seem able to look up so Alexander gently touched her chin, pushing her head up. She stared at him through her lashes and smiled.

“I- I know this might be- something you never want to- to think about again or- but I do. Mine was- I don’t want it to- to- it’s not fair!” Eliza bunched her hands in her dress and Alexander frowned. He gently unclenched her hands and just held them for a long moment. Eliza’s breath hitched for a moment and she stared at him.

“Take a deep breath and start over.” Alexander said softly. Eliza stared at him for a long moment before she leant forwards and kissed Alexander.

Alexander didn’t know what to do to begin with, didn’t even know what was really happening, until he felt his hands, still entwined with Eliza’s, begin to inch up smooth skin marred by cut after cut.

He jerked backwards and stared at Eliza’s leg, where she’d just pulled up her dress. She’d sworn to him that she’d stopped, that she was recovering. He opened his mouth to say something about it but before he could, there were lips at his again.

Eliza put one hand on the back of his head and the other began to dance around his collar. Alexander tried to push back but his muscles were frozen in place.

“I don’t want them to be my only experience.” Eliza whispered. “I need you, Alexander.” Alexander felt his top button being undone and every muscle in his body was suddenly not his own.

_Reynolds slowly began to undo his shirt buttons, one by one. Alexander stared at him, not saying a word._

_“Aren’t you going to play, bitch?” The curse word was almost an endearment, said so softly Alexander could almost forget what it meant._

_“What do you want me to do?” Alexander asked. Reynolds grinned._

_“You’re learning.”_

_“The camera isn’t on.” Alexander murmured. Reynolds just shrugged._

_“My friends aren’t here either. Doesn’t mean we can’t have some fun.” Reynolds threw Alexander’s shirt to the side. Alexander watched it fall to the floor and wished he could follow it. Reynolds sat back and stared at Alexander._

_“The- the prep?”_

_“Oh no.” Reynolds smiled, the smile that told Alexander he was in for so much pain. “I don’t think that’s going to be necessary.”_

“Alexander?” Eliza asked softly. “Alexander? Thomas! THOMAS!”

Thomas ran into the room and froze as he saw the scene in front of him. Alexander was shirtless, staring vacantly ahead. Eliza’s dress was bunched up and his hands were on her legs.

“What the fuck?” Thomas breathed out. He crouched in front of Alexander and slowly did up his shirt, remembering another time he had to do this. “What did you do, Eliza?”

“I just- I kissed him and then- I didn’t- oh god I didn’t mean to!” Eliza began to sob and Thomas paused between the two. He sighed and grabbed his phone to call Angelica. “Did I rape him?” Eliza asked. Thomas shook his head.

“He has these- he freezes up sometimes. You saw it and stopped, okay? That’s- that’s what’s important.”

“I need to go.” Eliza ran out of the door and Thomas sighed. He sat on the sofa where she’d been and put a gentle hand on Alexander.

“Alexander, it’s Thomas. You’re here, you’re okay. Can you hear me?” There was no response and Thomas sighed. “Please, Alexander. We can- we can head home and- I’m sure Gil will be happy to- fuck, I don’t know what you do. Fuck. Please, Alexander.”

“Thomas?” Alexander asked softly. He didn’t tear his eyes away from the one spot he was focused on.

“Yeah, yeah it’s me.”

“Did-” Alexander blinked and looked around slowly. “Reynolds?”

“Who?”

“He was…”

“You had a flashback. You’re safe. Nothing happened. Eliza- she got confused and kissed you. That was it.”

“Kissed me?”

“I- I don’t know-”

“But I don’t want her to kiss me.” Alexander blurted out.

“She knows that and wants to apolo-”

“I wanna kiss you.”

Thomas stared at Alexander for a long moment before he sat back.

“What?”

“I wanna kiss you.” Alexander mumbled, as if he was terrified it was no longer a suitable answer.

“Alexander, I don’t think…” Thomas broke off, struggling to find a reason to say no. He knew he should say no, knew that he couldn’t just kiss Alexander now, not when he had only just come down from a major flashback.

His reasons were washed away as Alexander’s chapped lips pressed against his.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick warning, this chapter and the next are probably the last of the fluff in this story. At chapter 26 I will (as requested by you guys a while back) go down the angsty route and the fic will get sad

When the kiss ended, Alexander let his forehead rest against Thomas’. Thomas let out a long breath.

“This is wrong, Alexander.”

“Why?”

“You’re hurt.”

“And? That’s not going to change.”

“Alexander.” Thomas groaned out. Alexander pulled back and stared at Thomas.

“Tell me why not.”

“Because they raped you.”

“And? What does that fucking matter?”

“They raped you and I can’t- I can’t hurt you, Alexander.”

Alexander stared up at Thomas and sighed.

“Please, Thomas. I- I need-” He leant forwards again and began to kiss him. Thomas pushed him back.

“I can’t-”

“You like me, don’t you?”

“Alexander…”

“You watched the videos for me. You’ve seen me. You’ve been here when I talked to Eliza and you- you never treated me differently. You’ve never treated me differently.”

“That’s not enough.”

“Is this?” Alexander kissed Thomas again and Thomas groaned gently and returned the gentle gesture.

“I don’t know.”

“Tell me you don’t want it. Tell me you’d not do it for any reason other than me. Tell me.”

“I can’t.”

Alexander sat back with a self-satisfied smirk on his face.

“I like you, Thomas. Nothing’s gonna change that.”

“I like you too.”

“Well I’m glad about that.”

 

It took another week until Alexander returned to school. He waited outside the school for Thomas and the Schuyler sisters before he even considered entering the building. Eliza looked away from him almost immediately and moved on. Thomas squeezed Alexander’s hand and he took in a deep breath.

He hadn’t been in the building since that catastrophic lesson with King’s hand creeping up his leg. He’d been assured he wouldn’t see King again, a mixture of the harsh punishment the boy would incur and the fact that they were in different years.

“You got your lunch?” Aaron asked softly as he stared up at the school. Alexander nodded. “Try to eat a bit of it today. We’re got nutrition shakes at home if- if you still can’t.”

“Thanks.” Alexander mumbled. He then lay his head on Thomas’ chest.

“You ready for this?” Thomas asked gently.

“Dunno. What happens if- if they remember?”

“There’s no way for me to make it stop but I can be here.”

“Thanks.” Alexander squeezed his hand lightly before he stepped away.

 

Alexander stared up at the board, not quite understanding what he was seeing. He could feel Thomas’ eyes boring into him but he didn’t dare look at him, not when there was something like that on the board.

“Alexander-”

“Do you know who wrote it?” Alexander asked dully.

“No. But I-”

“Ten dollars to fuck Alexander Hamilton.” Alexander read out. He turned back to Thomas. “Well at least they didn’t try to be inventive.”

“Do you want me to tell Washington?”

“I can’t run off to Washington every time something bad happens. No matter- no matter how tempting it is.”

“You can if they pull shit like this.” Thomas strode forwards and began to scrub the words off the board. Other students began to file into the room and Alexander sank into a seat. Some of the students giggled at the words that Thomas was still trying to rub off and Alexander groaned quietly.

High school was shit.

Someone sat down next to Alexander and he glanced at the person who quickly looked away.

“Seating plan.” They muttered. Alexander nodded and stared back at his boyfriend who had finally managed to clean the board. He turned back to Alexander and smiled gently. As he walked to his own seat he gently touched Alexander’s shoulder.

Alexander was glad that he didn’t try to do anything more than that. He didn’t want too many people knowing he was dating Thomas. It was a secret, a secret that for once didn’t feel bad.

The teacher walked into the room and looked around the class. She glanced at Alexander and paused. Alexander looked down and the woman carried on.

“Now then class, today we’re- we’re studying- sex education.”

Alexander let out a sigh at that and closed his eyes. What the fuck did he do to deserve that?

“Well we know who we need to ask.” Somebody whispered at the back of the class. Alexander glanced behind and saw Thomas glaring at one of the other students. Alexander stared back at the front and tried to take a deep breath.

“Now then, as the state decrees, most of this class will be about abstinence. Does anyone know what that means?” A few hands went up around the room and the teenager in front of Alexander was picked.

“Not sleeping around.”

“It means not losing your virginity until marriage.”

Alexander sank down further in his seat and closed his eyes, already wishing the lesson was over.

 

“Okay, partner up with someone, anyone.” The teacher began handing out bananas and Alexander stared. Thomas sat down next to him and glared around. Alexander took the banana and Thomas accepted the condom from the teacher.

“You okay?” Thomas whispered. Alexander nodded slowly. He reached for the condom and paused. “Alexander?”

“Are people staring?”

“Yeah.”

“I can’t- I don’t want to do this.” Alexander handed the items to Thomas who nodded slowly.

“Okay.”

“No it’s fucking not.” Alexander stared behind him and saw people ducking their heads down.

“Well I can do this. And then class’ll be over and we can talk to Washington or-”

“I can’t just go to him. I have to fight my own battles.”

“You don’t need to fight all of them.” As Thomas spoke he undid the condom and began to pull it down the banana. “There are people to help you.”

“I- I’m going to the loo.” Alexander stood and made his way to the door.

“Alexander!”

Alexander paused and turned to see the teacher staring at him.

“Yes, miss?”

“Where are you going?”

“The toilet.”

“No. Come here.”

Alexander slowly turned and walked towards the teacher. She extended a banana and a condom and he stared down at them. Thomas frowned as Alexander didn’t move, just stared at the two items with barely hidden disgust.

“Take them, Alexander.” The teacher ordered. Alexander slowly did. “Now then, this was meant to be a group exercise. Thomas was not meant to do it for you. Do you understand?”

“Yes, miss.”

“You do not leave my classroom without asking my permission.”

“Yes, miss.”

“Now show the class how you put it on.”

Alexander stayed stock still for several moments, every eye on the class on him. Thomas frowned and nearly stood but held himself back. Alexander wouldn’t want him to fight this fight. Not yet.

“I can’t.” Alexander said softly.

“Excuse me?” The teacher asked. Alexander put the items down and stared at the teacher.

“I don’t know how to put on a condom.” Alexander stated. His hand shook and he shoved them into his pocket.

“How is that possible?”

“What does that mean?” Alexander jutted out his chin and stared up at her.

“Everyone knows you’re a slut!” One of the classmates yelled out. Alexander flushed and Thomas leapt to his feet. He stared around for a moment before he stepped towards Alexander.

“Come on, this has gone far enough.” Thomas muttered quietly. Alexander nodded silently. Thomas took his arm and steered him out of the room. When he reached the doorway the teacher called out again.

Thomas didn’t listen.

“Where are we going?”

“Washington.”

“No I- I don’t wanna.” Alexander wiped at his eyes and Thomas felt his stomach drop. He hadn’t even realised Alexander was crying.

“Okay. Okay.” Thomas pulled Alexander into a hug. “It’ll be okay.”

“I got chlamydia.” Alexander murmured. “Chlamydia, Thomas! I- I don’t understand- I don’t understand why you want me.”

“What they did isn’t you.”

“But-”

“No, fuck this shit, alright? Come on.” Thomas grabbed hold of Alexander’s hand and began to tug him gently. “This was too early.”

“It’s been over a month, Thomas. I- I have to-”

“Not yet. Come on.” Thomas continued to lead Alexander down the corridor, out the door and out of the school entirely. Alexander paused for a moment at that and Thomas paused.

“What are we doing?”

“We’re bunking off.” Thomas answered, as if it was the simplest answer. Alexander smiled faintly and nodded his acceptance.

 

The two spent the rest of the day in Thomas’ house, curled up on the sofa. Thomas had sent quick messages to everyone who would be worried but hadn’t told anyone where they’d be. He thought it was better this way.

“I’m glad you were the one who saw the videos.” Alexander muttered. Thomas paused and frowned.

“How come?”

“I’m glad I had you on my side. And that- that I still do.”

“You always will.”

“I know you want to ask.”

“What do you mean?”

“You want to ask the same thing all my classmates wanted to ask.”

“I don’t need the answer.”

“You can have it though.” Alexander leant up and kissed Thomas. “That’s the point of our relationship.”

“How come you don’t know how to put on a condom?” Thomas asked softly. Alexander sighed even though he’d expected the question.

“They tied me up almost all the time. Even when they didn’t, they didn’t like to- they wanted to feel me, not plastic. So they didn’t normally use condoms. They never put one on me or anything so…”

“Okay.” Thomas murmured, burying his head in Alexander’s hair. He inhaled and smiled as he smelt the sweet strawberry shampoo the teenager had started using when he moved in with Washington.

“You’ve got too much patience for me.”

“No. You just don’t have any.”

There was silence for a moment before Alexander pulled away and stared at Thomas mournfully.

“Thomas, I- I might never be able to- you know.”

“What?”

“I might never be able to have sex with you.” Alexander tensed as if expecting a hit and Thomas frowned. “Like n-never. I’ve looked into other people’s recovery with- with similar cases and- I don’t know if- I might be able to but I’m- I think I’m sex-repulsed and it’s just- I mean I like kisses and I really like your hugs but-”

“Shh.” Thomas whispered. “I don’t care.”

“What?”

“Alexander, you- you’re not sex for me. You’re so, so much more.” Thomas bent forwards and gently kissed Alexander. “I hope that one day you can have sex because those monsters don’t get to take that away from you. I- I’m also not so much of an idiot that I don’t want you but that’s not important. We could remain celibate for the rest of our lives and I’d still want you. You’re not sex.”

“Thank you.” Alexander whispered.

“Alexander, I’m almost worried about what I’d do for you.” Thomas shifted forwards again and let Alexander lean again his chest. “I’ve had feelings since before I saw that first video. I- man, I’m an idiot.”

“We already knew that.” Alexander grinned up at Thomas who grinned in return.

“Here I was, trying to be nice-”

“You don’t know the meaning of the word.”

“Really?” Thomas arched one eyebrow before he bent down and kissed Alexander deeply. When he pulled back Alexander remained, lips parted and eyes shut. He looked the image of perfection and Thomas looped arms around him, pulling him into his lap. Alexander looked up at him in surprise and Thomas instantly released his grip. “Is this okay?”

“Yeah. This is- I think this is actually kinda perfect.” Alexander leant back against his boyfriend’s chest and Thomas tried his hardest to ignore how he could feel every vertebrae as it pressed almost painfully against his belly.

Their words were pretty but Alexander had scars covering him, scars that not even Thomas could begin to imagine.


	25. Chapter 25

Alexander poked at his food as Lafayette and Washington continued their heated debate about where Lafayette should apply for next year. Lafayette thought he should return to France, didn’t even want to consider American universities while Washington pointed out that the teenager hadn’t lived in France for years.

Martha, Aaron and Alexander ignored the debate that had raged for the last three nights.

“You eating any of that?” Aaron asked, pointing down to Alexander’s plate. Gone were the days of subtlety, the days that Aaron would talk around it, pretend as if it wasn’t an issue. Alexander knew that if Aaron was no long taking a back seat then something was really wrong.

“I dunno.” Alexander admitted. The light feelings in his stomach from spending the day with Thomas were helping him consider eat something but the memory of his public embarrassment was having the opposite effect.

“Do you want me to set you an amount?” Aaron asked softly. Alexander sighed but nodded and pushed his plate over. Aaron cut a dividing line through his food, heaped most of the food on one side and about a quarter of it to the other side. “Just that much, nothing more.”

“Thanks.” Alexander took the plate back and stared down at it. Lafayette paused for a moment and Alexander felt his eyes on him.

“Is that enough?” Lafayette asked. Aaron glanced up and sighed.

“I think the point is to make me forget how much I’m eating.” Alexander muttered. “So I- I see how much I haven’t eaten rather than how much I have.”

“That’s the general theory, yes.” Aaron admitted quietly. “Unless you want more porridge or another protein shake.”

“Those are shit options.” Alexander poked at his food again before he groaned. “If I eat like half of this then can I have a protein shake for my lunchbox tomorrow?”

“You’re thinking of going back into school?” Washington asked, surprise in his voice.

“Course.”

“Alexander-”

“I want to be taken out of sex-ed classes but- but I can do it. I know I can.” Alexander stared down at his plate and scooped up a forkful of what he was pretty sure was mashed potato. He put it in his mouth and began to chew slowly at it. It felt like everything in his mouth was expanding, crushing his throat further and further.

Alexander grabbed for a napkin and spat the food into it. He stared down at it in disgust before he crumbled the napkin up.

He went back to idly stabbing peas and bringing those to his mouth instead. He managed to get a few of those down eventually and when everyone else had finally finished eating, most of the peas were gone.

Aaron stared down at the plate and sighed. He glanced at Martha who nodded.

“Alexander,” Martha started, “I can’t have you eat that little.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“You have to eat.”

“Can’t I eat it later?”

“You won’t.”

“Martha-”

“Porridge, protein shake or what Aaron has set out for you.”

Alexander sighed and stared down at his plate. He wasn’t going to be able to get down that much mashed potato, not when his throat closed up at the mere thought of something filling his mouth and choking him. It was a problem with all the foods offered but they’d found it was better to give him softer foods after he’d nearly choked during a panic attack.

“Porridge.” Alexander said glumly. Martha nodded and stood, taking his plate as she did.

“Do you want anything in it? Honey maybe?”

“No thanks. Just- just plain.”

“I’ll just go get that for you then.” Martha left the room and Washington continued to gather plates in her absence. Aaron glanced at Alexander and sighed.

“You know we’re doing this for your own good, right?”

“Yeah.” Alexander sighed. “Just wish I didn’t have to be force-fed.”

“It’ll get better. We can see if there’s anything that catches your eye at the supermarket and-”

“You heard about what happened today, didn’t you?” Alexander asked, speaking over Aaron.

“Yeah.” Aaron said after a moment.

“Everyone’s heard it?”

“Yeah.”

“Fucking great.”

“Alexander-” Aaron sighed. “Most people think it’s a rumour, that it’s- it’s not true.”

“How is that better?” Alexander snapped. He crossed his arms and leant back.

“I don’t know.”

“I just hate it.” Alexander sighed. “I could’a- I could’a got back to school. I could’a got back to my life but instead that had to happen.”

“I heard you got to spend the day with your boyfriend instead.” Aaron smiled softly as Alexander studiously ignored his gaze.

“And?” Alexander snapped.

“I’m teasing, Alexander. There’s no problem spending time with Thomas.”

“I know.” Alexander crossed his arm and stared at Aaron. “I just- I dunno. Everything’s more difficult around him. And it’s better as well, you know but- but I think it might be- I wonder if…”

“What’s more difficult?” Aaron sat down and gestured for Alexander to follow the motion. Alexander slumped into the seat and let out a long breath.

“Touching him.” Alexander admitted softly. Aaron sighed. “Believing I’m worth a damn. He- he’s Thomas, Aaron.”

“And you’re Alexander.” Aaron rebuffed. Alexander sighed and nodded.

“And I’m Alexander.” Alexander said, voice quiet. Aaron frowned at the sadness in his voice, at how little he obviously thought of himself.

Before Aaron could say anything else, the door opened and Martha walked back in with a bowl of porridge. She set it down in front of Alexander who stared down at it glumly.

“Thanks, Martha.” Alexander said numbly as he reached for his spoon. Aaron watched as he struggled through the bowl and then had to go to his room and lie on his back, trying not to throw up.

There had to be a way to fix his brother. Aaron just didn’t know what it was.

 

“Aaron says you’re having problems eating.” Thomas said, quite bluntly, in History the next day. Alexander glanced at him and nodded. The hubbub in the rest of the room was loud enough that he didn’t need to be worried about eavesdroppers.

“Feel sick.”

“Meet me at lunch.”

“Why?”

“I’ve got an idea.” With that Thomas grinned that self-satisfied smirk that Alexander knew he used to hate. Instead he just gently touched his hand to Thomas’.

 

“So what’s your idea?” Alexander flopped into one of the seats at the lunch table and stared at Thomas. Thomas glanced around and shook his head.

“Not here.”

“Not- then where are we going?”

“Do you have a coat?”

“Yeah.” Alexander had fought violently about getting one but the Washingtons hadn’t taken no for an answer when they saw how cold he got. A mixture of how thin he was and how unused he still was to the cold American weather.

“Then come on.” Thomas stood and the two made their way out of the cafeteria. Thomas walked out of the building and came to a stop by the bleachers. He sat down and Alexander sat next to him.

“Thomas, I don’t-”

“I know you don’t want people knowing about our relationship and I get that.” Thomas leant forwards and kissed Alexander gently. He then just let his forehead rest against the shorter boy’s. “I respect that choice and understand why you made it but out here? There’s no-one.” Alexander glanced around and saw that was indeed the case.

“So you brought me here to kiss me?”

“I can do that any other time. No.” Thomas pulled back and reached for Alexander’s bag. Alexander allowed him to pull his lunchbox out but then he paused. “Why can’t you eat?”

“It’s just-” Alexander shrugged. “Easier not to.”

“And that’s how you starve to death.” Thomas opened the lunchbox and began sorting through it. “Any preferences?”

“Preferences?”

“On what you wanna eat.”

“I don’t wanna eat anything.” Alexander whined. Thomas paused and sighed. He turned to stare at Alexander full on.

“Alexander, I know that- I know that you’ve had choices taken away too many times but very soon this one will be as well. No-one wants to force you but unless you start eating- and a lot- they’ll have to hospitalise you.”

“And shove a tube down my throat. I know.” Alexander picked at a loose thread on his jeans and sighed. “I know what happens if I don’t eat, Thomas. I- I get it.”

“I don’t think you do.”

“Excuse me?”

“Look, I’m here as a loving boyfriend but I’m also here because Martha Washington talked me into it. She- she weighed you a few days ago and- Alexander, you’re severely underweight. Your BMI is what you’d expect of someone with an eating disorder.”

“That’s ridiculous. I don’t-”

“It also means you’ve probably got warning signs from your body.” Thomas overrode Alexander and Alexander paused. “That you didn’t tell anyone about. So what are they?”

“I’m just- a bit weaker is all.”

“A bit weaker?”

“I’m finding it difficult to lift heavy stuff. Getting tired. Black spots in front of my eyes.” Alexander shrugged. “Not a big deal.”

“Your body’s breaking down your muscles.” Thomas stated. Alexander looked away. “And you knew.”

“I can’t make myself eat, Thomas.”

“What’s the problem? The real problem?”

“I- it feels like my throat closes up and I’m gonna choke on it. Even- even when I manage to get something down it sticks and I’m scared I’m going to die. Liquid based stuff- that’s the only stuff that works anymore.”

“Okay. How about this, you tell me one thing you want me to do and I’ll tell you how much I want you to eat.”

“Wh-what?”

“I know that- that I can be annoying. I know that sometimes you want to make me apologise or-”

“No, no!” Alexander put his hands on Thomas’ chest and shook his head. “I don’t- I don’t want to hurt you!”

“Hey,” Thomas gently caught Alexander’s elbows and sighed. “I didn’t mean it like that. But you want me to- I don’t know, make fucking cookies? Wear some dumb outfit? Get you I don’t know, a new pair of socks? I can do that. If there’s anything that puts me off, of course I’ll tell you and I won’t do it.”

“And if I just wanna kiss you?” Alexander leaned forwards and Thomas smiled. Alexander continued to lean forwards but before he could touch Thomas’ lips Thomas held up a grape between them. Alexander stared at it for a moment before he looked at Thomas. “Really?”

“What you want me to give you a thimble instead?” Thomas asked, challengingly. Alexander smiled and slowly took the grape. He put it in his mouth and closed his eyes as he began to slowly chew. Thomas took one of his hands and held it. “Open your eyes, Alexander.” Thomas murmured. Alexander flicked his eyes open. As he did, his mouth stopped moving. “Do you want your reward now?”

Alexander frowned and nodded. He took in a deep breath before he swallowed. Thomas was on him in an instant. Alexander relaxed into the kiss but it was over almost as soon as it had begun.

“That wasn’t a kiss!”

“I never said how long it would last.” Thomas grinned and Alexander glared.

“I want another. A longer one.”

“Okay.” Thomas grabbed for the sandwich in the lunchbox and began to pull it apart. He offered part of it to Alexander who took it slowly. “I’m right here, Alexander. I have water and nothing’s going to go wrong.”

“Yeah.” Alexander began slowly eating the small bit of sandwich he’d been given. He tore it apart and made sure there was never much in his mouth. When he had finally swallowed it down, Thomas leant forwards again.

The two carried on like that until Alexander was basically sat in Thomas’ lap and half of the lunchbox was gone. Thomas gave Alexander one last kiss to his forehead and just sat back. Alexander relaxed back and let out a sigh.

“His trial’s next week.” Alexander said softly.

“Yeah.”

“What if- what if he’s released?”

“Then we’ll get a restraining order. But he won’t. Your testimony will be damning.”

“It just- it just all rests on my shoulders and that’s-” Alexander broke off and looked up at Thomas. Thomas gently squeezed the teenager.

“I know. It must be terrifying but we’re here, alright? And they have the videos. They can identify him by voice. They have his DNA on you.”

“They have the rape kit.” Alexander sighed and snuggled further into Thomas’ warmth. Thomas smiled at his boyfriend’s cat-like behaviour. He raised his hand to gently pet Alexander’s hair, not noticing how the boy tensed up the moment he did.

“It’ll all be okay. You just have to tell them the truth.”

“Stop.” Alexander commanded shakily. Thomas froze as Alexander scrambled backwards. Alexander moved until there was no contact between the two and then stopped. Alexander took in deep breaths and looked sick.

“Alexander?” Thomas asked softly.

“Not my hair. Not- not now.” Alexander croaked out as a reason. Thomas sighed and nodded.

“I’m sorry, I should have-” Before Thomas could finish his sentence, Alexander lunged forwards and began to vomit. “Shit.” Thomas murmured as he rushed forwards. He grabbed for the water bottle and hesitated for a moment.

Had it been any other moment he would have collected Alexander’s hair at the back of his head, held it there as the boy vomited.

He didn’t dare touch his boyfriend.

When the meal had finished coming up and Alexander was just vomiting bile he groaned and sat back. Thomas gently led him away from the pool of vomit and handed him the water bottle. There were tears in Alexander’s eyes and Thomas didn’t know why.

“It’s gonna be okay, Alexander.” Thomas whispered. “It’ll all be okay.”

He didn’t even need to look at Alexander to know he didn’t believe Thomas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So um if anyone's looking for a fic that shares themes to this one but is a bit more explicit and kinda darker then I'll probably be uploading something called 'Promises' in a couple of hours. My first attempt at smut so uh... sorry mum


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I figure that cause this is a short chapter it's good to upload this now and then have a bit of a longer break before the next one, that's how it works right?

“My suit doesn’t fit.” Alexander mumbled to the breakfast table. They turned to stare at him, the words taking a moment.

“Suit?” Thomas asked. He’d stayed overnight at the request of Alexander. Washington had been less than happy about it until Alexander had promised, blushing furiously, that sex wasn’t anywhere near the table.

“For the- I only tried it on today and I mean it fitted when I got it but now-” Alexander shrugged and Thomas sighed.

“We can get you something today.” Washington assured Alexander. Alexander nodded dully.

“Thank you.” Alexander went back to poking numbly at his porridge and Thomas sighed. He pulled out his phone and wrote a quick text.

**To: Alexander**

**You finish that bowl and we can do anything you want**

Alexander jumped as his phone buzzed and he stared down at the message.

**From: Alexander**

**Anything?**

**To: Alexander**

**Anything**

**From: Alexander**

**Can you just hold me?**

**To: Alexander**

**Of course**

Alexander put his phone back into his pocket and began to force the porridge down his throat. When he was done he shot a triumphant look at Thomas who grinned back.

“Well done.” Lafayette announced. Alexander glanced at him and smiled shyly.

 

Aaron sat in the living room, tapping his finger against his knee. Everyone was beginning to arrive for the trial later in the day. He’d be called for witness, both for finding Alexander and for seeing the changes beforehand.

He glanced up as Angelica stepped into the room. She paused at the sight of him and bit her lip.

“Angelica.”

“Aaron. Where- uh- do you know where Alexander is?”

“He had to get a suit. He went with Martha.”

“Right and uh-” Angelica shifted from foot to foot for a moment before she glanced behind her. “I- I’m here to support him. Obviously.”

“Yeah.”

“Eliza would come but she- she’s having a bad day. Peggy will be there. But- but not- not yet. Just me.”

“Okay.”

“I’m sorry. I’m not very- about the past-”

“It’s in the past.” Aaron stated. He didn’t need Angelica to apologise.

“She never told me.” Angelica burst out. “She- I asked if- I asked. You have to believe me. I asked if you were hurt. And- and she said- she said no. She said he’d never hurt you. That he- he liked you too much.”

“You don’t want to know how much my uncle liked me.” Aaron murmured. Angelica frowned and Aaron sighed. He then lowered his collar slightly to reveal his white scar on the side of his neck. “He burned through my skin with coins.”

“I’m sorry.”

“The other seven scarred even worse. They were left for longer.” Aaron stared at Angelica who suddenly couldn’t keep his gaze. “It was her birthday. She abandoned me, Angelica and you helped her.”

“I- I asked her.”

“And she lied.” Aaron shook his head.

“I have her number.” Angelica blurted out. Aaron froze and stared at her.

“What?”

“I have her number. I- I swore that I wouldn’t give it to anyone but you- you deserve to talk to her.”

“And if I don’t want to?”

“Aaron, I-” Angelica sighed and sank down into a seat. “She told me why she left.”

“Because she was tired of being hit.”

“He touched her.” Angelica stated. Aaron looked away. He’d guessed, of course he had. But he’d never had it confirmed. “And then- then you- Aaron, did he- you know?”

“What are you asking?”

“Did your uncle ever try to rape you?” Angelica asked softly. Aaron paused. He could say no. His uncle never tried to rape him, his uncle tried to sleep with him, tried to convince him that it was the right thing to do, the thing that Aaron would enjoy the most. His goal had never been rape.

Aaron wasn’t stupid enough to think his uncle would have stopped before that.

“No.” Aaron stated. “He hit me. He burnt me. He made me feel like I was nothing. He never raped me.”

“Okay. I just thought- the way you responded to this was so- but if he didn’t-”

“Did he rape her?” Aaron asked softly. Angelica nodded.

“Several times. That’s why she left in a hurry, Aaron. Not because she didn’t want you but because- because her child was- she- he impregnated her. And she didn’t want an abortion.”

“Fuck.” Aaron whispered, putting his head in his hands. “She was a child.”

“She was old enough to know what she was doing.”

“No. No she fucking wasn’t. Please, give me her number.”

“Don’t be angry at her. That’s- that’s all I ask.”

Aaron nodded numbly and took the piece of paper.

 

Martha closed the front door behind her and instantly was looking into the eyes of four teenagers. She chuckled gently before she shooed them away.

“Where’s Alexander?” Thomas asked, worried.

“He decided he wanted to spend a bit of time on his own. He went for a walk.”

“A walk? But he has court in a few hours!”

“Hours, Thomas. I doubt he’s going to be gone for that long. He has his phone if something goes wrong.”

“But-”

“He has things he has to work through.” Martha said softly. “Things you can’t help with.”

“And if something happens to him?” Thomas pushed. Martha shook her head.

“This is Alexander. He’s strong.”

Thomas scowled at that, remembering how James had said the same words not that long ago.

 

“Where is he?” Thomas asked, pacing. Lafayette sighed and shrugged. “He’s going to miss court!”

“We do not know.”

“Someone has to!”

“Was he acting strange this morning?” Aaron asked. Thomas shook his head.

“He was normal right up until the moment he just ran off to God knows where! I just don’t understand-” Thomas froze as his phone buzzed. He fished it out of his pocket. “It’s Alexander!” He opened the text and paused.

“What is it?” Aaron asked softly. Thomas looked away, looking halfway to throwing up.

“I need you to call the police.” Thomas tried to keep his voice level. Aaron and Lafayette tensed at that. “He’s been attacked and raped.”

“What?”

Thomas slowly turned the phone to show the other two a naked Alexander, face down on the cold concrete. There were bruises covering his body and there was blood pooling onto the concrete beneath him. His lips were tinged blue, the cold obviously getting to him. In fact, the only thing covering him from the winter temperatures was a single ten dollar note stuck to the blood dribbling down his thighs.


	27. Chapter 27

Alexander was aware of the cold pressing down on him, the cold so invasive he wasn’t sure how he hadn’t crumbled underneath it. Then there was the wail of a siren and he slowly forced his eyes open. Paramedics descended on him, a barrage of questions flying too fast for him to understand.

He just let his eyes slide closed and tried not to cry.

 

Thomas burst into the hospital room and hurried towards Alexander who was lying so still on the bed.

“Whoa, you can’t be in here.” One of the nurses said, catching him. Thomas stared at Alexander, at the split lip, at the bruised eye and wanted to break down.

“He was meant to be safe.” Thomas murmured.

“Okay, who are you?”

“Thomas. Thomas Jefferson. I’m his boyfriend.”

“Let’s get you out of here and-”

“Why isn’t he waking up?” Thomas dug his feet in and stared at Alexander who was lying prone. “Why isn’t he awake?”

“He needs stitches.” The nurse said softly.

“Why does he need to be asleep for that?” Thomas asked numbly. The nurse sighed.

“Internal stitches. He didn’t allow them to be put in awake.” Thomas stared at the nurse as the words slowly sank in. He then stared back at the small figure of Alexander.

“He was meant to be safe.” Thomas whispered.

“Let’s get you sat down somewhere.”

 

Lafayette paced furiously in the waiting room while Aaron just stared numbly ahead. Court was meant to start in less than an hour but there was no way they were leaving the hospital. Someone had already sent news to the court, asking for a delay.

Aaron could only hope that they’d get it.

“I do not believe this!” Lafayette cried out, throwing up his hands. “It is ridiculous! What was he doing there? How did this happen once more?”

“We’re going to get to the bottom of this, Lafayette. I promise.” Washington stated.

“He was raped!” Lafayette shouted. “He was left naked and pictured just for power! How can we control this?”

Thomas put his head in his hands and felt his breath begin to shorten. There was a mumbled curse and then there were hands on him. He could feel tears streaking down his face and then Lafayette was murmuring something in his ear.

“He was mea-meant to be safe.” Thomas whispered. “And I- I was mad he was late! What- they won’t leave him alone! And-”

“He will.” Lafayette said softly. “He will be left alone. He will be safe. And then-”

“I want to help him but I don’t know how.” Thomas muttered. “I don’t know how.”

 

It took Alexander a few hours to wake up and when he did, he was groggy. Thomas was by his side in an instant, holding his hand gently.

“Th’mas?” Alexander asked softly. Thomas nodded and Alexander smiled. He winced as that pulled at his split lip and threatened to tear it apart all over again.

“I’m here, Alexander. I’m here.”

“Court?”

“They’re trying to get a- a delay. Maybe do it in a week or something.”

“Need to do it today.” Alexander half sat up and paused as a wave of nausea hit him. Thomas grabbed his shoulders and gently pressed him back down.

“Not yet you don’t.”

“Please. I just-” Alexander bit down on his lower lip. “I just want this to be over! I just- I just want to be safe, Thomas!”

“You will be.” Thomas gently kissed Alexander’s hand. “I promise.”

“I just want to be safe.” Alexander half sobbed out.

 

“There’s no way he can be in court today.” Thomas stated. Washington sighed.

“He may not have an option.”

“He’s just been raped!” Thomas shouted.

“He was raped every day.” Aaron said softly. Thomas turned to him. “He- existed through that. He need to give one testimony. One testimony and then a couple of questions and it’s over.”

“You think it’s that easy to just fucking get over being raped?” Thomas spat out. Aaron took in a deep breath and looked away.

“If he wants to testify and thinks he can then who are we to say he can’t?”

“We’re his friends!”

“What kind of friends would we be if we stopped his step-father from going to prison?”

“The kind that cares about his wellbeing now!”

“We can’t.” Aaron stated softly. “If we force him to stop then-”

“You didn’t see him in there. He was-”

“Was he worse than when we found him in a fucking box?” Aaron spat out. Thomas looked away and Aaron shook his head. “We- we can’t control him, Thomas.” Aaron added in a much softer voice.

“Can’t we protect him at least?” Thomas asked, tired all of a sudden.

“Not from this.”

 

Alexander lay in the hospital bed, staring into nothingness as the doctor walked into the door. Washington, Lafayette, Aaron and Thomas all perked up at the sight of her.

“Alexander Hamilton?”

“That’s me.” Alexander said softly. The woman nodded and smiled gently.

“Okay well, your blood results have been sent away for testing. The good news is that your attacker seemed to use a condom so the chances of an STD of any kind is incredibly low. However, it also means that there is little chance of the rape test coming back with any useful information. The police will want to interview you on what the man looked like and we can supply them with all the necessary information.”

“When can I leave?” Alexander asked, barely looking up.

“In just a few more hours. I know this is probably the last place you want to be but as you had historic damage I feel like it’s best that you-”

“Historic damage?” Thomas asked softly. Alexander looked away before he answered.

“When you found me. And the- the times before that.”

Thomas stared down at him for a moment before he gently squeezed his hand and the doctor continued.

“Well, anyway, you should go to your local doctor in about a week’s time just to make sure everything is healing as it should be. I’m prescribing stool softeners and I suggest that you do not attempt any sexual interaction until your local doctor has given the all clear.”

“Okay.” Alexander mumbled. Thomas stared down at him and wished he had the right words.

“I’ll also be prescribing pain killers and the nurses can explain to you how to use them.”

“Okay.”

“Do you have any questions?”

“No.”

Thomas stared at Alexander and bit his lip. He then looked at the doctor and smiled.

“Thank you, doctor.”

The woman smiled and left the room. Alexander then leant back and let out a long sigh.

“Do you remember what the man looked like?” Washington asked. Alexander tensed and glanced at him.

“Not uh- not really.”

“How?”

“He surprised me,” Alexander admitted softly. “He uh- pinned me. Against a wall.”

Aaron frowned at that as he stared at Alexander’s split lip and quickly growing black eye, injuries that would have to be taken face on. He could see that Washington also didn’t believe Alexander. Thomas and Lafayette seemed to accept it more easily.

“So you could not see him?” Lafayette asked. Alexander nodded. “I am so sorry.”

“Yeah. He uh- he- didn’t say anything or- or anything like that. He just- you know.” Alexander stared down at his hands and let out a long breath. “It was like I wasn’t even- I wasn’t even human. Just- a thing. Something to use.”

Lafayette gently took hold of Alexander’s free hand and squeezed gently.

“Well it is good that we all know that is not true.”

Alexander stared up at him, an unreadable expression in his eyes. He then slowly nodded.

“Yeah. I- I’m more than just- just that.”

Thomas wished he could say Alexander believed his own words.

 

Alexander sat outside the courtroom, still just staring down at his hands. Lafayette worried his lower lip as he stared at the teenager.

“Everything will be fine, Alexander.”

“C-course.” Alexander stood and began to walk forwards but then stopped as if someone had yanked him back. He looked around and looked so lost Lafayette’s heart wrenched.

“Come, sit down,” Lafayette said softly. Alexander sank into the seat and stared ahead. “What is worrying you so much?”

“I don’t want to explain what they did to me,” Alexander muttered. “What they- the-” Alexander shook his head and sighed. “I don’t want to.”

“You do not have to now. You could-”

“But I will have to. I- I’ll have to- to- they hurt me and- the videos and-” Alexander broke off again and rubbed at his eyes. Tears streaked down his face and Lafayette felt that same almost overwhelming urge to hug him, to hold him and to never let go.

“The videos will not be showed to everyone.”

“But they- they’re still there. People watched me-” Alexander let his head drop. “It hurt, Laf. It hurt so fucking much.”

“But you are safe now. You will not be touched by your step-father or by any of those men.” Alexander glanced up, a touch of fear in his eyes.

“It’s too late, Laf. It has been for a- a really long time.”

 

Alexander looked over the court-room and took in a deep breath. Thomas could see how his hands were shaking, maybe with fear, maybe with the cold.

“Please state your name for the record.”

“Alexander Hamilton.” Alexander stared out at Thomas who offered him a comforting smile that he didn’t seem able to return.

“Now then, after the events you were unable to give a full statement so today you will be doing that. You have plenty of time and if you want a break then that can happen. But we need to know as much as you can tell us.”

“O- okay.” Alexander let out a long breath and glanced at his hands which were shaking. Thomas scowled at that and leant forwards.

“What’s happening?” Thomas whispered to Angelica. Angelica shrugged.

“It-uh- it started with- this one night he came-”

“Please use the name of the person, Alexander. So as not to create confusion.”

“Yeah, O- okay. Adams. My- my step-father. He came into my bedroom one night and we had a- a talk.”

“A talk?”

“That my mother’s care was expensive and that if it carried on then he didn’t have the money to provide us both with. He explained I needed to start work.”

“That’s not true,” Thomas murmured. Angelica frowned and stared at him.

“What?”

“He was working beforehand. He’s remembering it wrong.”

“Alexander, on that day, did your step-father rape you?”

Alexander glanced down at Adams for the first time. Adams stared back at him, looking cold. Thomas knew that was a bad sign.

“No. He didn’t rape me that night. My stepfather, John Adams, has never raped me.”


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we're down to the last ten chapters! Which is pretty terrifying cause I have very little of the sequel written out

Alexander’s proclamation left the courtroom in silence for several moments before the others started to mutter between themselves. The judge frowned and glanced over at the prosecutor who looked equally baffled.

“Order, order!” The judge shouted out. She then let out a deep breath. “Alexander, are you telling me that John Adams, the man sat there did not rape you?”

“Yes.”

“Then why did you say he did?”

“Because I kissed him,” Alexander muttered. “I kissed him that night and he- he told me to stop but I didn’t. I undressed in front of him and kissed him again and again. I undressed him and- and he told me that he didn’t have enough control. I told him I didn’t want him to. We had sex but he didn’t- he didn’t rape me. I wanted it.” The prosecutor stared at Alexander as if he was insane. She then rifled through her notes.

“Alexander, later that evening did your step father threaten your mother if you told anyone?”

“He said that he shouldn’t have done it and that- that if anyone found out then he’d be removed as my step-father. But- but I’m seventeen!” Alexander stood and if you weren’t paying attention you could have almost missed how badly his hands were shaking. “I don’t care that he’s meant to be my step-father, he didn’t molest me or anything!”

“Then why did you tell the police officers he did?”

“I was scared. I- I came up with this idea for- a one-time thing. I invited some people over and then- they would fuck me. We’d film it and then sell it. It would get me five hundred dollars, more if I sold it to multiple sites. And then-”

“In the past you said that Adams was the driving factor behind that decision, are you now saying you were lying?”

“Yes.”

“Alexander, remember that perjury is a federal offence that could hold a sentence of years behind bars. Are these really people who you want to go to jail for?” Alexander glanced at Thomas for a moment before he took in a shuddering breath.

“I love him,” Alexander announced. “And he loves me.” He slowly tore his eyes back to the prosecutor. “What else matters?”

“I have no more questions.” The prosecutor sat down, glaring at Alexander. The other lawyer rose with a wide smile. Alexander stared at him, trying to fight the urge to turn on his heels and run.

“So, Alexander, when did your feelings for my client start?”

“A few months ago,” Alexander muttered. “I didn’t- I didn’t expect it to happen but he- he was there when no-one else was.” Alexander glanced at Thomas again who frowned. “And- and I know he’ll probably hate me after this but I- I have to tell the truth.”

“Why do you think he’ll hate you?”

“He didn’t know I was uploading videos. I- I asked to film some with him and then I uploaded them for money. I lied and said I was- I was working when he asked me where I was getting the money. I didn’t want to disappoint him.”

“Why do you think he’d be disappointed?”

“Because I’m just a whore.” Alexander stared down at his hands and bit his lip. “Because- because I’m nothing compared to him.”

“He’s lying out of his ass,” Thomas hissed to Angelica. Angelica nodded slowly.

“Why?”

“No fucking clue but I’ll figure it out.”

“Alexander, how did you get into a- relationship with the men in these videos?”

“It wasn’t a relationship. Not- not really. They would- I put up my address online when I knew A-John would be out of the house. I let them come in. I said just- just low level stuff. I’d blow them or jerk them off and then- then I could sell the video. Then one of them- he decided-” Alexander took in a shuddering breath.

“Go on.” The lawyer pushed. Alexander looked down.

“He told me he wanted- wanted something else. Something I said no to.”

“What was it?”

“I-” Alexander glanced at the prosecutor but the woman didn’t rise to object, too busy shuffling through papers. “Double penetration,” Alexander said softly. There was a murmur from the crowd at that. Thomas tightened his fist at the memory of the videos King had sent so far back. “I said no but he- he tied me up. They forced me. They hurt me.” Tears rose to Alexander’s eyes.

“Do you have any idea as to who these people were?”

“No. They- they wore masks.”

“Constantly?”

“After that first time I didn’t want to let them in but one of them had stolen a key so they- they let themselves in and- and found me and-” Alexander wiped at his eyes. “They left me ten dollars every time. They did whatever they wanted to me. Then they left.”

“And what did my client think of this?”

“He didn’t know. If he had found out I- I think he would have been furious. We kept on sleeping together. I- I spent a lot of time in his bed and-” Alexander glanced at Adams for a moment who was smiling up at him. “I loved him.” Alexander barely managed to get the words out. “I still love him.”

“And what do you think would be a suitable punishment for him?”

“I- I think-” Alexander swallowed, looking sick. “John should be let free and the p-police should focus on trying to find the men behind the masks. I don’t need to be- to be adopted by the Washingtons. I should be released back into the care of John. I’ll be- I’ll be happy there.”

 

“What the fuck was that?” Thomas roared the instant he and Alexander were alone. Alexander crossed his arms and glared at him.

“Fuck off, Jefferson.”

“No! You don’t get to pull the last name bullshit! You love him? Are you a fucking idiot? You never loved him! You hate him!”

“You don’t get to fucking tell me how I feel!” Alexander screamed. Thomas glared at Alexander.

“Well it looks like someone fucking has to! Because apparently you think it’s okay to lie in a courtroom! That’s fucking perjury and-”

“I’m not an idiot, Thomas!” Alexander strode forwards and shoved Thomas back. “You don’t get to talk to me like one!”

“Well it looks like someone has to!”

“Fuck you!” Alexander screamed. “I can-”

“I saw you in that box!” Thomas shouted. Alexander paused. “I saw you shoved in a box like you were nothing! I saw that and-”

“Why did you take me out?” Alexander asked softly. Thomas stared at him for a moment.

“What?”

“Why didn’t you just- nothing.”

“Why did you lie in there?” Thomas asked. Alexander shook his head.

“I didn’t. If your fucking pride is busted then tough shit. I don’t care.”

“So what, that’s it?” Thomas scoffed and turned away. “So you fell in love with your abusive step father? You fucked him willingly? You want me to believe that?”

“It’s the truth.”

“And a bunch of men in masks turned you into the ten dollar whore you are?” Thomas scoffed again. “Don’t fucking lie to me!” Thomas took a step forwards and tightened his fist. Alexander gasped and stumbled backwards, tripping over his own legs and slamming into the floor. “Alexander!” Thomas rushed forwards but Alexander raised a hand.

“No.”

“I don’t-” Thomas stared, frozen in place, unable to help his boyfriend. Alexander slowly rose to his feet and stared at Thomas.

“I had to date you,” Alexander stated. Thomas stared at him in confusion.

“What?”

“I had to have someone to protect me,” Alexander spat out. “I had to have someone willing to lie to themselves again and again to pretend I gave a shit about them.”

“Alexander-”

“I fucking don’t!” Alexander shouted. “I hate you, Jefferson and that never fucking changed! You’re an elitist piece of scum who wouldn’t know how to care for someone if it was the last thing! I fucked strangers for ten dollars and yet I never touched you. You don’t think that was strange?”

“It was-”

“No. No, it wasn’t me getting over it. It was me fucking revolted by the thought of touching something like you!” Alexander spat out. Thomas stared at him in horror. “You really think anyone cares about you, Jefferson? They’re pretending, faking it until you just fuck off and leave us alone! No-one ever fucking wants you!”

“Well I wanted you,” Thomas whispered. Alexander stared at him for a moment before he scoffed.

“Tough shit.”

With that, he turned on his heel and strode out of the room. Thomas watched him go for a moment before he felt tears sliding down his face. He leant against the wall and was almost surprised when his knees gave out and he went crashing to the floor.

He leant over himself and sobbed, again and again until he felt empty.

“You okay?”

Thomas’ head snapped up as he saw a man standing in the hallway. It was the same man from the funeral who had been talking to Alexander.

“Uh- yeah.” Thomas wiped at his eyes and shook his head. “Sorry. My- my boyfriend just-”

“Hey, it’s okay.” The man sat down next to Thomas. “Everyone’s allowed a break-down, right?”

“Yeah. I guess.” Thomas pulled out his phone and stared numbly down at the messages. He didn’t read any of them, just re-pocketed the phone.

“So what happened?”

“He just told me no-one wanted me and he was just dating me for convenience.” Thomas scoffed. “Convenience. Just- fuck.”

“Sounds like a pretty trashy boyfriend.”

“He’s going through a lot.”

“Doesn’t mean he gets to force you to do the same.”

“But it’s-” Thomas shook his head. “I don’t even fucking know what it is anymore.”

“It’s Alexander, isn’t it?”

“Yeah. How do you know him?”

“He’s my nephew.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

“You don’t- you don’t look very similar, is all.”

“No. I’m from his father’s side of the family. Alexander- we never got on.”

“How come?”

“Alexander’s troubled. He always has been. Ever since his father died he-”

“Died?”

“Yeah.”

“Alexander told me he left.”

“God no, James loved Alexander with all his heart. Heaven and Earth wouldn’t have taken Alexander away from him. No, one day he just- he was taken to the hospital. He ate rat poison somehow. We never found out how. Alexander was with him and he- the poor kid didn’t tell anyone his dad was allergic to charcoal.”

“He died,” Thomas murmured. The man nodded. “Shit.”

“It was easier for Alexander to think that he just left. Than think that Alexander could have saved him.”

“Shouldn’t he have had identification? Or- or something?”

“Alexander took it.”

“What?”

“He’s always liked lying.” The man sighed. “And he took his father’s medical ID bracelet. I- I don’t know why. The police investigated but he was too young to have criminal charges brought against him or anything. If-”

“Criminal charges?”

“They told me if he’s been old enough they would have counted it as manslaughter or even murder.”

“Fuck.” Thomas stared down at his hands. “He- he’s always lied?”

“From a young age, yeah. It only got worse after that. He’d get the police called out to his house for no reason, he’d say there was someone following him home from school, he’d see some escaped criminal on TV or something and would say he knew where they were. Alexander’s troubled.”

“That’s not fucking troubled, that’s psychopathy.”

“Don’t be too hard on the kid, he just-”

“So all of this- he was just using me?” Thomas shook his head. “I thought- I thought…”

“Alexander might be coming to stay with me for a bit.”

“Why didn’t he do it earlier?”

“He didn’t bother telling anyone I existed.” The man sighed. “Typical Alexander, really. Any time he doesn’t want to believe something he lies about it. I was called out for the funeral but that was it.”

“He was assaulted,” Thomas said softly.

“What?”

“By one of the men. He was- he was raped and beaten and ten dollars was left on him. I think they’re making fun of him or- or telling him that he’s not safe. I want to protect him but-”

“If he doesn’t want you to then you can’t.” The man laid a gentle hand on Thomas’ shoulder. “Maybe it’s better for you to keep your distance for a bit? Here, give me your number.” He handed Thomas his phone. “If Alexander comes to his senses then I’ll call you.”

“Thank you.”

“Keep safe, Thomas.” With that the man stood and walked down the hall. He disappeared into one of the bathrooms and looked around, making sure it was empty.

Almost empty.

“I did what you wanted me to do, Reynolds.” Alexander’s voice rose from one of the stalls. Reynolds turned to face him. Alexander’s face was streaked with tears.

“Is that any way to greet your master?”

“I’m not your fucking bitch!” Alexander shouted. He stormed forwards but before he could even touch Reynolds, the man grabbed his throat and slammed him into the wall. Alexander scrabbled at the hands for several moments before he let go and just stared at Reynolds. Reynolds grinned at him.

“I didn’t tell you to break up with your boytoy.”

Alexander’s eyes widened in fear and Reynolds shook his head slowly.

“That could bring a lot of attention.”

“It won’t! I- I swear!” Alexander croaked out. Reynolds released him and Alexander shrank into the wall, staring at him. “I can- I can make sure he doesn’t ask any questions. Please, Reynolds. Please!”

“Use my title.”

Alexander dropped to his knees, ignoring the pool of something his left knee landed in. He stared up at Reynolds, defeat written in every line of his body.

“Please, master. Don’t hurt Thomas. He won’t interfere.”

Reynolds stared down at him for a moment. He then pulled his phone out and snapped a picture of the boy in front of him, defeated.

“Prove your obedience, bitch,” Reynolds all but whispered. Alexander stared with wide eyes to the door.

“What if someone walks in?”

“Then you’d better be a fucking good liar,” Reynolds snarled as he grabbed Alexander’s hair and pulled him up. He kissed the teenager roughly, forcing his tongue into Alexander’s unresisting mouth. “You know what happens if you’re not.”


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please remember, all that stuff Thomas learned about Alexander's history of lying and his father last chapter was told to him by Reynolds. Reynolds who has no reason to tell the truth and every reason in the world to isolate Alexander as much as he can and frame him as a monster.

Alexander sat in the audience, staring as the jury rose, Adams’ conviction in his hand. Thomas sat on one side, every muscle tense and ready to attack. Aaron sat on the other side, looking relaxed to anyone who didn’t know him.

Unfortunately Alexander knew him far too well.

“We, the jury, find John Adams not guilty on all charges.”

Alexander stared numbly down at his hands. The judge sighed and nodded.

“John Adams, the state apologises for the time we have taken up. You are free to go.”

Alexander stared at Adams as he was un-cuffed and began to massage his wrists. He smiled at Alexander who forced himself to smile back. He knew Reynolds was in the audience somewhere. He also knew that he couldn’t afford to fail.

The judge sighed and stood. She stared at Alexander for a moment before she turned and left the room.

Then the room was moving. Alexander glanced at Adams and he stood. He began to walk forwards and Thomas grabbed his wrist. Alexander gasped and stared down at him. Thomas glared up.

“Don’t.”

“F-fuck off.” Alexander murmured. Thomas scowled and let his arm go. Alexander then turned and strode towards Adams. The man stared down at him calculatingly and Alexander felt his breath speed up. He remembered the nightmares of Aaron screaming underneath Reynolds, Eliza dull eyed and bleeding out, Lafayette ripped apart, mouth caked with vomit from the agony.

Alexander pressed his lips against Adams. Adams snaked a hand down to Alexander’s ass and squeezed. Alexander felt vomit rising in his throat but he didn’t let himself move, didn’t let anything change as he continued to kiss his step-father.

A harsh grip descended on Alexander’s arm and he was yanked back. He whimpered slightly and whirled around to see Lafayette’s furious face.

“What are you doing?” Lafayette spat out.

“Let go of me.” Alexander growled. He could feel Adams looming behind him and he was too close, everything was too close, too big and it almost hurt.

“I won’t let you lie again.” Lafayette snarled.

“What will you do to stop me?” Alexander took a step forwards and Lafayette scowled.

“I will- I will drag you back to the house! You are not going to harm yourself again!”

“You’re not going to fucking stop me.” Alexander growled out. Lafayette grabbed his arm and Adams stepped forwards. Alexander sucked in a breath and swung a fist, almost wildly. Lafayette stumbled backwards, staring at Alexander in horror as he brought a shaking hand to his red face.

Alexander stared for a moment before arms descended around him and Adams’ smell was everywhere.

“Do not make a scene.” Adams whispered. Alexander nodded slowly. Adams kissed the top of Alexander’s head and Alexander tried to muffle his whimper. “Who’s your friend?” Adams asked at normal volume.

“Lafayette. He was leaving.”

“Alexander-”

Alexander turned and kissed Adams again, feeling a tongue enter his mouth. He forced himself to let out a moan. When he was released Thomas was staring at him with cold eyes. Alexander could feel his stomach drop but didn’t move.

“Tell them I’ll be back later.” Alexander mumbled. He then turned and walked off with Adams. Thomas clenched his hand into a fist but remained rooted to the spot, unable to help.

As soon as Alexander was outside the building Reynolds was there. The two men flanked him and Alexander quailed under the knowledge of how small he actually was.

“James, so nice of you to join us.” Adams said, with humour in his voice. “I presume you’re responsible for this miracle?”

“Let’s get back to your house before we talk too much.”

“My house?”

“We can hardly go back to mine, my whore wife is pregnant.”

“Yours?”

“Does it matter?” Reynolds scoffed. “She’s useless until it’s out of her.”

“And the bastard?” Adams ran a hand down Alexander’s hair and the boy shuddered.

“We’ll have plenty of uses for him.”

Alexander felt tears rise in his eyes but he did nothing about them as he climbed into Reynolds’ car.

 

Lafayette sat in an armchair, holding an icepack against his rapidly swelling cheek. He scowled in front of him at nothingness. Aaron, Angelica and Thomas all sat around him in silence.

Angelica was the first to tentatively break it.

“He wouldn’t- do anything stupid, would he? I mean he- he’s still not meant to be having sex for another week.”

“They have other uses for him.” Aaron said softly. Thomas nodded. “Thomas, you watched the videos. Would it stop them?”

“No.”

“We cannot allow this to happen again!” Lafayette cried out. “We cannot-”

“We’re not allowing anything.” Angelica said calmingly. “We’re just working out the best way to get through this.”

“His uncle came up to me.” Thomas said softly.

“Uncle?” Aaron asked in confusion.

“He said- he said that he was going to try and adopt Alexander. Maybe- maybe if he did then he’d be away from Adams? He’s be safe?”

Aaron scowled at that and reached up, almost unconsciously, to scratch at the circle of silver on his neck. Lafayette caught the motion before he could stop it.

“Uncles are not always better.”

“Anything would be better than Adams.” Aaron whispered.

“Your uncle?” Angelica asked. Aaron stared down at the floor.

“Maybe.”

_It had started with gentle touches, kind words, a lingering hand here or there, a treat not deserved. He didn’t see it then, only when he was looking back._

_Even when he was punished there would be a soft hand in his too-long hair, a word of encouragement or a whispered word of how much his uncle loved him._

_And how that would never stop._

Aaron stood abruptly and clenched his hand into a fist. The other three stared at him as he took in a shaking breath.

“We failed him last time. We- we can’t- can’t do that again.”

“Aaron-” Angelica said softly. Aaron shook his head.

“We have to stop it.”

 

When the three arrived at the all too familiar house Alexander paused.

“I thought this was in my name.” Alexander said softly. Adams scoffed.

“Not now that I’m free.” Adams leant forwards and grabbed Alexander’s hair, yanking it back. Alexander whimpered as Adams immediately began to bite at his exposed neck. Alexander tried to get free but the grip in his hair just tightened.

“Knock it off.” Reynolds muttered.

“He’s going to be punished.”

“Not here. Not now. And don’t leave marks this time.”

“I wasn’t the one that fucking whored him out and filmed it.”

“The videos didn’t get you caught. Breaking his arm did.” Reynolds stared at Alexander with disgust in his eyes. Alexander shrank down in his seat. “Now get it inside and we can see what we can do with it.”

 

“I won’t let what happened to Sarah happen to Alexander.” Angelica said softly. Aaron turned slightly to see her.

“What?”

“I- I was curious as to why you freaked out so much about all of this but if you were in that household, if you saw things happening then- well I’d understand it.”

“It’s not-”

“We’re going to get Alexander back and we’re going to make sure he’s safe. He-”

“He shouldn’t have to come back.”

“But-”

“Anyway, nothing happened to me. I don’t get- I don’t get to react.”

“Aaron,” Angelica let out a sigh. “Alexander hasn’t said much about what happened to you but I mean, you were still hit. You were still abused mentally. Even if he never touched you-”

_“Do you want to play a game today? I promise it’s easy.”_

“He didn’t touch me.” Aaron growled out. He turned away and stared at the wall. “He raped my sister. Adams raped Alexander. My uncle- he never-”

_“Just take off your clothes. It’s easy, Aaron.”_

“You were in the same house as a child molester.” Angelica stated. “I’d be amazed if it didn’t fuck you up.”

“ _Uncle I don’t wanna. Please can I just go? I didn’t do my homework yet._ ”

“We don’t have time to talk about this.” Aaron almost whispered. He clenched his hand into a fist, not allowing the memories to overcome him. “We need to look after- Alexander comes first.

_“I told you to do something, Aaron. If you disobey me then you get a punishment. Do you understand?”_

_“Please…”_

“That doesn’t mean you come last.” Angelica said softly. Aaron looked away and nodded, numb.

Alexander was forced to sit at the edge of the double bed. He stared at the wall opposite and refused to let the tears gathering in his eyes fall. He could hear Adams running a bath in the other room and Reynolds was somewhere.

He could just run, run through the house that used to be a home and not stop until he was with Thomas or Aaron. Not stop until he was safe.

He knew he couldn’t run, not really. Not if he cared and he did care, he cared so much that it hurt. It hurt every single part of him to remember the look on Thomas’ face as Alexander kissed Adams. It hurt to know that Eliza would hear that he was back with his rapist, that everything they’d talked about was just as worthless as he was.

“The question is do we sell him?” Reynolds asked, almost conversationally as he walked back into the room. Alexander shuddered as Adams appeared in the doorway.

“Sell him?”

“Well we can’t exactly make money off his videos anymore. They leave too much of a trace. But it’s not like he’s worth any less now.”

“He’s skinny.”

“Well we’ll make him eat.” Reynolds walked over to Alexander and grabbed his chin. He turned it from side to side before he released it. “If he’s willing to get fucked he’ll be willing to eat.” Alexander stared down at his hands and blinked back the tears gathering in his eyes.

“And if they leave marks on him?”

“We have a decent enough alibi. The fact that he likes it rough and the courts know you two are fucking. Anyway, if he says nothing is happening then they can’t do anything.”

“You really think that would work?”

“Bitch, how long until you’re eighteen?” Reynolds asked. Alexander continued to stare blankly. It took him several beats to realise that Reynolds was talking to him and by the time he had realised it, Reynolds had his hair in a tight grip and was hauling him upwards. Alexander whimpered.

“Five months!” Alexander blurted out. Reynolds nodded and dropped him back onto the bed.

“So, five months,” Reynolds continued as if Alexander hadn’t said a word. “And then we can do whatever we want. He won’t be a child anymore and CPS will have nothing on us.”

“And until then?” Adams asked. Reynolds grinned, a wide smile that made Alexander’s stomach drop.

“We can always get inventive.”

 

_Aaron clung to the scarf around his neck, shivering at the cold. He knew he didn’t really need to, knew that the dried blood around his neck would keep it there for a while longer._

_“Aaron?” Aaron snapped his head up to see Alexander stood there. Aaron opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out. Instead he whimpered softly and put his head down. Alexander crouched down next to him and gently touched the scarf._

_“No.” Aaron rasped out. The word was barely recognisable but it made Alexander freeze. Aaron continued to sob in front of him. Alexander put a gentle hand on his shoulder. Aaron remained tensed as Alexander put his other hand on Aaron’s other shoulder._

_Then the fight drained out of Aaron and he collapsed forwards into the smaller boy._

_“It’s okay.” Alexander whispered. Aaron shook his head and just clung tighter. “Aaron, I’m here now. I’m not going to let go. But I need to make sure you’re okay.”_

_“’m not.” Aaron’s voice was still too harsh, sounded like someone had spent the night choking him._

_“Take off the scarf, please.” Alexander almost pleaded. Aaron paused. “I can make sure you’re safe.”_

_“No.” Aaron whispered. Alexander’s hands went to the scarf and Aaron moved his hands away._

_“Trust me.” Alexander begged. Aaron stared at him and nodded weakly._

 

Alexander got back to the house late at night. He was limping slightly and his hair was wet. Aaron was sat on his bed and made Alexander jump violently.

“A-Aaron?” Alexander asked, voice rough. Aaron turned to face him and eyed him critically. There were no visible injuries but Aaron knew better.

“What did he do?”  Aaron asked softly. Alexander shook his head and looked away.

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Alexander, I can help.”

“I’m fine.”

“Alexander-”

“I’m fucking fine!” Alexander shouted. Aaron stared at him as Alexander looked away and took in a deep breath.

“Alexander?”

“Go away.”

“Please just-”

“Go away, Aaron.”

“Please talk to me.”

“No.” Alexander paused and began to cough. The cough was rough and it sounded like it was ripping his throat apart. His wet hair fell into his eyes as he coughed and Aaron stared at him.

“Why’s your hair wet?”

“Rain.” Alexander rasped out. Aaron scowled.

“Liar.”

“Fuck off.”

“Alexander-”

“Fuck off!” Alexander screamed. Aaron continued to scowl and slowly turned. He left the room silently. Alexander watched him go for a moment before he continued to cough and hack up the water he could still feel all through his system.

 

_“He did this to you?” Alexander asked, horrified. “Your uncle?”_

_“Please-” Aaron whispered, not even sure of what he was asking for anymore. Alexander gently touched the bloody skin all the way around his neck._

_“God, Aaron. This could have killed you.”_

_“No. He won’t-” Aaron broke down at that, at the truth in his own sentence. He knew that his uncle wouldn’t kill him. If Aaron was dead then he was useless, unfuckable._

_“Aaron-”_

_“I don’t know what to do.” Aaron whispered. “I can’t leave.”_

_“You have to!”_

_“I don’t have anyone else!” Tears streaked down his face and Alexander scowled. He wrapped tight arms around Aaron and pulled him close._

_“Fuck that. You have me. And I’m not going anywhere.”_

 

Alexander was subdued at school the next day. His friends spent most of the day staring at him but he couldn’t bring himself to respond to them. James and Thomas weren’t sitting with them that day. It made Alexander sick to the stomach even to see the other teenager’s face.

Lafayette seemed quieter than normal, he didn’t react to Alexander in the ways he should. He was withdrawn and Hercules was worried about him.

“Laf, you okay?” Hercules murmured at lunch. Lafayette glanced at him and nodded slowly. “Laf?”

“Alexander.” Lafayette replied. The two turned to stare at Alexander who was staring down at his phone, knuckles white with the strength. Aaron and John were staring at Alexander as well but nothing seemed to get through to Alexander.

He stood abruptly and checked the time.

“I need to go.” Alexander grabbed his still full lunchbox and shoved it into his bag. He went to stride out of the cafeteria, ignoring the gazes that followed him. Aaron grabbed his arm and Alexander flinched.

“Stay.”

 

_“Stay here, okay? I’m gonna go get help.” Alexander promised quietly. Aaron shook his head._

_“Please don’t leave me. I- I can’t-”_

_“Okay. Okay.” Alexander brought Aaron into a tight hug again. “Okay. I won’t leave.”_

_“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I’m such a burden.” Aaron sobbed into Alexander’s shoulder. “I’m sorry I couldn’t play his games or- or obey his orders or take his punishments. I’m sorry! I’m sorry!”_

_“You have nothing to be sorry for.”_

 

Alexander shook loose Aaron’s arm and strode from the room.


	30. Chapter 30

Alexander forced a slow, long breath out through his nose. His entire body was burning with pain. Adams and Reynolds knew they couldn’t hurt him visibly so they were getting creative.

Alexander’s arms were raised above his head and his legs were tied together, his knees the lowest point as they were placed on hard rice. He could barely keep stable, his hands tied above his head. His shoulders were screaming at him, his knees were open and bleeding, his head was pounding with the amount of time he’d been there and his sides were stretched too far. Tears were sliding down his face and he was sobbing gently.

It felt like every iota in his body was screeching at him but he himself couldn’t say a word around the gag stretching his mouth open.

There was also a thick rope around his neck, more for show than anything else. When he let his head drop it tugged at his skin, cut off his breathing but for the rest of the time it was just scratchy and painful.

Alexander flinched suddenly as the wardrobe door swung open to reveal Adams. Adams stared down at the teenager and smiled widely. Alexander stared up at him and attempted to blink the tears in his eyes away.

“Time for you to come out now, bastard.” Adams whispered. He untied the noose around Alexander’s neck and the teenager sucked in a deep breath. Then Adams cut through the rope around his hands and Alexander’s front half slammed into the floor. He let out a muffled cry of pain and turned slightly to the side. Adams was staring down at him with disgust and fresh tears sprang to Alexander’s eyes.

Adams didn’t say a word as he untied Alexander’s legs and forced the boy to his feet. Alexander stumbled but managed to remain roughly upright as he was dragged through the house. He was eventually thrown down onto a bed and he squeezed his eyes shut once more. He didn’t want to know what was about to happen, what kind of punishment he was about to get.

It had been a week since Adams had been freed and every night Alexander was punished in some new way. The first day had been the worst, when his head had been forced underwater again and again until he vomited up water and lost himself in a flashback so powerful he didn’t even notice as he was dragged to the bed.

They’d left him alone in the bed that night, vomit caked inches from his face from where he’d passed out. He’d managed to drag himself into the bathroom and dab at the vomit caked around his mouth before he limped back to Washington’s house to face Aaron’s disappointment.

The bed dipped beside Alexander, causing his head to snap to Adams. Adams ran a gentle hand down Alexander’s body before he grabbed at the teenager’s exposed crotch. Alexander shouted out at that but there was barely a noise from behind the gag.

“Your punishments are almost over.” Adams whispered softly. Alexander stared up at him, not believing him for a second. He couldn’t afford to trust Adams. “Reynolds is so very inventive in these.”

“I have experience.” Reynolds said flippantly as he walked into the room. Alexander closed his eyes, not willing to see what was in the man’s hands. Just because his punishment was nearly over didn’t mean it was over.

“So we sell it?” Adams asked. Reynolds muttered an affirmative and Alexander felt the bed dip on his other side. He felt so close to throwing up but he couldn’t do that, not now.

“We’ll have to feed it.” Reynolds ran a critical hand across Alexander’s ribs. “Can’t heal fast enough like this.”

“There’s still the issue of the Washingtons.”

Alexander flicked his eyes open at that and stared at them. Reynolds saw the motion and grinned.

“Does that worry you, bitch?”

Alexander made a muffled whining noise through the gag but couldn’t do anything else. Reynolds rolled his eyes before he almost gently pulled the gag from Alexander’s mouth.

“Please- please don’t hurt them.” Alexander whispered, voice rough.

“Then obey everything we tell you to do.” Reynolds shifted so he was straddling Alexander. Alexander stared up at him but didn’t make a move to fight back. “And none of them need to know.”

 

Alexander stumbled back into the house three hours later. His legs wanted to give out from under him but he couldn’t allow that to happen, not yet, not when he was so close to being able to sleep in a bed like a normal person.

“When am I meant to help?” Aaron’s voice made Alexander jump. He stared up to see Aaron sat in a chair at the end of the hallway. There was a thick book on the floor next to him that he’d obviously just put down.

“Wh-what?”

“When you’re being hit? When you’re being raped?” Aaron stood and made his way to Alexander. He gently touched the side of Alexander’s mouth. “When you’re being gagged?” Aaron asked quietly. Alexander closed his eyes and tried not to cry. “Tell me, Alexander because I don’t know.”

“When I ask.”

“Alexander, if I wait until then, you’ll be dead.”

Alexander looked down at the ground at that, numbness filling him. Aaron sighed and pulled him into a gentle hug.

“Tell me what he’s got on you and we can go back to the police. If he’s threatening you then we can get a police protection. If it’s something then we can put it somewhere safe. But- God, Alexander, we’re underage. You don’t deserve this.”

“I love Adams.” It didn’t sound real, even to Alexander’s ears. Aaron sighed and pulled back.

“You didn’t say his name once until the trial. You couldn’t. Even now, you call him by his surname. That’s- that’s not what people in love do.” Aaron gently tugged at Alexander’s collar and sighed at the bruise he could see. “Neither is that.”

“Aaron- please, Aaron.” Alexander whimpered out. Aaron shook his head.

“Tell me and I can protect you.”

“No.” Alexander stepped back and rubbed at his eyes. “N-no.”

“Oh, Alexander.”

Alexander turned on his heel and ran up the stairs at that. He didn’t stop until he was under his duvet. The tears he’d been holding back rolled down his face and there wasn’t enough oxygen in his lungs as he all but howled for the escape Aaron was offering, as if anything in his life was that simple.

 

Alexander stared into nothing as he felt a collar descend around his neck. Reynolds stepped back and chuckled at the vision the teenager made.

“You’re a proper bitch, now.”

“Yes, master.” Alexander whispered. Reynolds grinned and put a bowl in front of Alexander. Alexander stared down at the food in it and felt relief wash over him as he recognised it as human food. That was immediately followed by disgust, that he’d fallen so far that something as simple as human food served in a dog bowl, with a collar around his neck, was something to be relieved about.

“Eat. Your first client is coming here in half an hour.”

Alexander shifted slightly, his knees still raw from the cupboard punishment. He didn’t want to eat the food in front of him, knew that if he did then it would come back up in not that long. He didn’t want to imagine the punishment he’d get if he threw up on a client.

“I told you to eat!”

“I- I’m sorry, master.” Alexander whispered. “I can’t.”

“Excuse me?”

“I can’t eat.” Alexander’s words were followed by a silence that was cut short as Reynolds kicked him in the side. Alexander whimpered but returned to kneeling almost instantly.

“If I have ordered you to do something then you will do it!”

“I can’t!” Alexander whispered, he knew he sounded so broken but he couldn’t make himself stop.

“You can’t or won’t?”

“I- I don’t know.”

“Well then.” Reynolds grabbed the back of the collar and hauled Alexander to his feet. Alexander scrabbled at the collar and relaxed the instant Reynolds released him. “Let’s see what happens when the bitch disobeys.”

 

Lafayette paced the living room angrily, his phone clutched tight in his hand. Aaron watched him go and sighed.

“Laf, sit down.”

“Where is he?” Lafayette shouted. Aaron flinched and Lafayette froze, worry crossing his face for a moment. Aaron gathered himself and stood slowly.

“Everything will be fine. Now let’s just sit down and wait.”

“If he misses this meeting then he could be taken away!”

“We both know that’s not true. Washington won’t let that happen.”

“Washington can do nothing if Alexander will not help himself!”

“The foster service know that Washington is a good foster father. They’ll trust that he’s trying.”

“Trying is not enough!”

“He lost his mother not that long ago, Laf. No-one expects him to be adjusted to life.”

“He spends no time at home anymore! His grades are dropping! He is bunking off! This is not Alexander!”

“And to a social worker that looks like teen rebellion.” Aaron put a gentle hand on each of Lafayette’s shoulders and gently pushed him to sit down. “Trust me, Laf. My sister-” Aaron took in a deep breath before he continued. “Sarah was rebellious. My Uncle told the social workers she was just being a teenager and it was- it was fine.” Aaron looked down, lost in the memory for a moment.

“Was it simply that?”

“No.” Aaron admitted softly. “It was my uncle.”

“How do you mean?”

“She was- Angelica told me that- Sarah was pregnant.”

“Merde,” Lafayette whispered, staring at Aaron in something so close to fear.

“My uncle.” Aaron found he couldn’t say anything more but Lafayette didn’t need him to.

“I am so sorry. Is she okay now?”

“I- I don’t know. But my point is that Alexander will be fine. He-”

“Do you wish to talk to her?”

“It’s complicated.”

“Why?”

“She left me. She- she left me in an abusive household. He didn’t- but he hit me. And she knew that. She always promised to look after me but then she just- up and left, like nothing mattered.”

“She was wrong to do that.”

“No. She was a child who was being raped. She was terrified and I- I get it. She left to protect herself and I shouldn’t blame her. But I do.”

“I do not know how to help.”

“You can’t.” Aaron sat back down and sighed. “And that’s the worst part of it. We can’t help.”

 

Alexander tugged at his restraints numbly as he saw Reynolds pacing around him. The client had been and gone, gracing Alexander only with pain around his hips that he was sure would bruise. And of course, the feeling of being used.

That feeling didn’t go away anymore though.

“Adams is late.” Reynolds snarled out. He turned to face Alexander and ran hands up along his body, grinning. “He wouldn’t want to miss this.”

“What- what are you going to do?” Alexander asked, voice weak. Reynolds grinned. Alexander was tied so he was standing upright. His body was straight and there were thick ropes around his ankles, midriff, wrists and neck. He knew that was bad, knew that if Reynolds was willing to leave visible injuries then something terrible was about to happen.

“You refused to eat.” Reynolds looked up as the front door closed. He smiled as Adams stepped into the kitchen. The man paused for a moment before he stared at the kitchen table, at the one area Alexander couldn’t see no matter how much he twisted or stretched.

“Already?” Adams asked. Reynolds shrugged.

“Why not? We prove we’re better than his current family and they have to give him to us.”

“Why today?”

“The little bitch disobeyed my orders. So he needs to be punished.”

Adams frowned at that and walked over to the kitchen table. He stood there for a long moment before he walked in front of Alexander. Alexander stared down at the pipe in his hands, not understanding it for a long moment.

“And this is the best way?”

Alexander frowned. Were they going to beat him with the pipe? They’d done similar things in the past but that was before they’d been found out, before they’d decided to be secretive about it all.

Then Reynolds picked up a gag with a gap in the middle, just long enough for the pipe to fit in it. Alexander stared at it in confusion as Reynolds stepped towards him.

“Open.” Alexander did, there was no point invoking their wrath this early. The gag was painful, pulling at the sides of his mouth and he whined gently. Neither Reynolds nor Adams did anything.

“I don’t like this, James.” Adams admitted. “What if it goes wrong?”

“Then we get a different whore. He’s not irreplaceable.” Reynolds seemed almost impatient and Alexander squirmed. “Anyway, it won’t.”

“Have you done this before?”

“I know the theory.”

“The theory? God, listen to yourself, man! We’re not going to get anything out of him if he’s dead.”

“And we won’t get anything out of him if he’s this thin. It’s not going to be long until it begins to show. He refuses to eat food normally so this is the best way.”

“I still don’t like this.”

“Well then go set up the bedroom or some shit. This needs to happen.”

“How long will it take?”

“The better part of an hour.” Reynolds took the pipe from Adams’ slack hands and placed it back down on the table. He then continued to do something behind Alexander’s back. Adams watched it with a frown on his face. “It’s not like I’m going to kill him doing this once.” Reynolds scoffed.

“It can go wrong.”

“And if it does then we dump him outside the hospital.”

“Fine.” Adams nodded slowly. “Tell me when he’s ready to be used again.”

With that, Adams left the room without a backward glance. Alexander stared after him and pulled desperately at his bonds. Then Reynolds was in front of him again.

“You know, you really should have just accepted the dog bowl.” Reynolds said softly. “You won’t enjoy this.” Alexander squirmed and tried to break free but then Reynolds grabbed hold of his neck. “Don’t struggle.” Reynolds took the pipe and placed it against Alexander’s lips. Alexander stared at him as he felt the pipe inch down his throat.

He couldn’t help it as his gag reflex acted up as the pipe was pushed further down. He struggled but Reynolds just sighed, as if he was ashamed.

“That won’t work.” Reynolds stared at Alexander’s throat, where the pipe was visible. Alexander let out a hoarse almost scream but could barely hear it himself. He was smart enough to know what force feeding was. “You really should have accepted the dog bowl.” Reynolds whispered as he began to push the pipe further down and Alexander screamed in agony.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so, disclaimer, I'm not a medical professional. This is gained from my history lessons on the suffragette hunger strikes, bits of googling and a medic friend. Even if this isn't how it works irl how I'm presuming it works for this fic is that this could go wrong at any time if the pipe ended up in the lungs it could drown Alexander. However, if Reynolds and Adams manage to find his stomach every time then theoretically Alexander could escape with only soft tissue damage to his throat that could heal with time. So that's what I'm working with


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey some explanation!

Alexander lay back, head lolling to the side. His stomach was uncomfortably full, just as it had been for the last hour. There was a clock right in front of him and he could see every second ticking by. His throat was ripped raw and he knew that if he could he’d be on his knees, throwing up the uncomfortable weight in his stomach.

Thomas’ words flickered through his head once more and he felt more tears slipping down his face. Thomas would never have forced him like this, would never have pushed a tube down his throat and poured sludge down it.

Alexander didn’t have time to think about that further as the door opened to reveal both Adams and Reynolds. Adams stared at him for a moment before he whistled softly. He stepped forwards and placed a hand over Alexander’s distended belly. Alexander tried to shrink back but there was no-where to go.

“How much did you feed him?”

“A lot. He’ll be wanting to throw up right about now so we can’t let him loose.”

“And there weren’t any problems?”

“No. I found his stomach and pumped a few meals in.”

Alexander let his eye slide closed at that. He’d barely been managing one meal every three days. If Reynolds had fed him that much it explained why he felt like he did.

“And when do we do it again?”

“You’re interested all of a sudden?”

“He needs feeding up. If this is the only way he allows it then it’s what we do.”

“He won’t need more food until tomorrow but I suggest we try to feed him as much as possible so we could go again in three hours?”

Alexander whimpered at that and both men snapped their heads to him. Reynolds grinned at the obvious terror in his eyes.

“Does the bitch have something to say to that?”

Alexander shook his head and Reynolds grinned.

“We can’t still have him in three hours.” Adams said, regret evident in his voice. “He needs to get back to his house if we don’t want to arouse suspicion.”

“Fuck suspicion. I want him.” Reynolds growled.

“And that’s how we get caught. Now undo his bindings and get him back to his house. You can have your fun with him tomorrow.”

As Reynolds slowly undid Alexander’s restraints Alexander collapsed forwards. Reynolds caught him but Alexander’s stomach immediately revolted. He landed hard on the floor and vomited again and again until the burning in his throat was his own and the nausea in his stomach was free from Reynolds’ touches.

 

It took Alexander another six hours to finally arrive back at the house. It was deep into the night at that point, he’d forgotten the exact time. He was expecting to be able to go straight to the toilet and throw up the remnants of the new feeding but instead he was met with the faces of Thomas, Eliza, Aaron, Lafayette, Martha and Washington the moment he stepped into the front door.

They all turned to stare at him and he looked away, ashamed of what they might see.

“Alexander.” Lafayette half rose but then paused, glancing back at Washington.

“I- I was going to go to bed.” Alexander muttered. Washington scowled.

“Sit down, Alexander.”

Alexander sank into one of the chairs and stared down at his hands. Aaron felt a tug telling him to go and comfort the boy but he couldn’t, not yet.

“Sir, I don’t-”

“You’ve been skipping out of school.” Washington stated. “You’ve been missing homework and overall your grades have dropped. If you were any other student then I’d be having a talk with your parents.”

“But you can’t because she’s fucking dead.” Alexander snapped out. Aaron looked up in surprise at that, at the pure anger running through Alexander. “So get it over with.”

“Do you have any explanation for why you’re doing so poorly?”

“I don’t need to fucking tell you.”

“Alexander.” A warning note entered Washington’s voice and Alexander shivered. Eliza saw that and she slowly stood and sat down next to Alexander. Alexander stared at her.

“They’re trying to help.”

“I don’t need their help.”

“Alexander, if you do not tell me where you’ve been going then I have no option other than to ground you.”

“Oh no.” Alexander snapped out.

“And put you into afterschool detention for the next two weeks.”

Alexander stared at him for several long moments before he scoffed and stood. He turned to the door but before he could walk towards it, Thomas was there, blocking the way. He scowled down at Alexander who glared back.

“Sit down, Alexander and we can talk it over.”

“Fuck off, Jefferson. Why are you even here?”

“Because I care about you.”

“Well more fool you.” Alexander tried to step past Thomas but before he could, Thomas grabbed his arm. Alexander flinched back as his hand descended over the rope indents but as soon as he’d recovered he turned to glare at Thomas.

“Stay and we can talk it over.”

“I don’t want to talk it over.”

“Alexander-”

“Get off me right now or I swear to fuck I’ll punch you.”

Thomas stared at him but didn’t move. Alexander’s eyes widened for a moment, his face softening. No punch came and the room waited with bated breath.

“Sit down and we can fix this,” Thomas whispered softly. He could see that Alexander was hurting and it almost hurt him so much he wanted to help.

“Nothing can fix this.” Alexander breathed out. He shoved Thomas backwards, making the teenager lose his grip on Alexander’s arm. Alexander then strode out of the house. He paused and let out a long breath.

There was no-where he could go.

He had no-one.

Alexander wiped tears from his eyes. He knew where he had to go. He knew where he always had to go.

 

Alexander woke the next day with Adams’ hand lying across his chest. He turned slightly to see Reynolds on the other side. Alexander let his eyes slide closed again, wishing he could just disappear, vanish into nothing.

“Wake up, bitch.” Alexander flinched as he felt a shove in his side. He looked up to see Reynolds staring back at him. “You’re going to be late for school.” Alexander scrambled out of the bed and began to pull his clothes back on. He then glanced at the time and paused. It was five in the morning.

“My- my school doesn’t start for hours.”

“I know. But you need feeding.”

“Pl-please Reynolds, please.”

“I’ll give you something to eat. If you do not then I will force it down your throat.”

“I can’t.” Alexander begged. His throat was still aching from the previous night and the nausea had barely passed. He couldn’t get through a whole day at school with that nausea running rampant through him.

“Then this will be quick.”

Alexander turned to the door and began to run. Reynolds snarled and grabbed him before he could, slamming him into the closed door. Alexander yelped and Reynolds held him tight.

“If you want I’ll let you go.” Reynolds whispered. “I’ll let you run to the cops or to Washington or your precious little boyfriend.” Alexander whimpered. “But you know exactly what will happen. Especially to that pretty little girl.”

“Please don’t.” Alexander whispered. “I- I’ll do what you want. I swear. I won’t- I won’t try to run. I won’t!”

“Good.” Reynolds released him and Alexander stared numbly at the floor. “You know what happens if you do.”

 

_Alexander stood on the corner of the street with his arms crossed, trying to control the shaking. He stared as a car rolled to a stop in front of him and the window was rolled down. Reynolds stared at him with that same indifferent look._

_Adams had at least looked at him as if he was human, as if he was less but like he was human. Reynolds looked at him like he was a thing, a dog out of control, a fuck-toy that was broken. Something to be tamed and fixed. If it couldn’t be fixed, then thrown away, put down._

_“Get in the car.” Reynolds said softly. Alexander gulped before he stepped into the car. “Give me your phone.” Alexander handed the device over and Reynolds stared at it. “Passcode?”_

_“1804.”_

_Reynolds unlocked the phone and swiped through it for a moment before he locked the doors and drove off. Alexander sat in the back as the city he knew began to disappear in front of him. He glanced up at Reynolds in fear but the man didn’t seem to even notice._

_“You’ve caused me a lot of hassle.” Reynolds said softly as the car slowed to a stop. Alexander glanced out the window and let out a breath as he realised they must still be in New York, just a very different version than what he was used to. “Get out.”_

_Alexander scrambled out of the car and followed Reynolds obediently. Reynolds led him down an alleyway before he paused. Alexander sucked in a shaky breath._

_“I- I’m sorry.” Alexander said softly. Reynolds sighed._

_“Good bitches don’t talk.”_

_Almost too fast for Alexander to see, Reynolds twisted. He pinned Alexander against the wall and held him there by the throat. Alexander scrabbled at his fingers for a moment before Reynolds tightened his grip and Alexander focused on just breathing._

_As black spots began to dance in front of Alexander’s eyes Reynolds dropped him. Alexander hit the floor hard and wheezed for several long moments._

_“Apologise.”_

_“I’m sorry.” Alexander whispered, not able to say anything louder. It seemed to satisfy Reynolds for the moment and he hauled Alexander back up and released him. Alexander pressed his back against the alley wall, trying to get as far away from the man as he could._

_“I’ve shown you that I know everything there is to know about your precious Thomas. I could hurt him any day. Or maybe that girl you hang around with. Elizabeth Schuyler. Do you think she’d scream when I fuck her this time? She was so very trusting last time. And so very sweet when she was sobbing.” Reynolds grinned at the tears in Alexander’s eyes._

_“Please-” Alexander was cut off by a vicious backhand that slammed his head into the wall._

_“Don’t talk.” Alexander nodded and Reynolds scowled. “I can ruin their lives so very easily, Alexander. Just like you’re intent on ruining mine. So here’s the deal, I leave you alive today, I don’t go after any of your friends and today you tell the courts you never saw anyone behind the masks. Tell them Adams didn’t rape you.”_

_“What?”_

_“Tell them you were such a desperate slut you fucked your own step-father. Tell them you wanted it. Tell them he never raped you, you were just so fucking desperate to be fucked you didn’t care who did it.”_

_“Reynolds-” Alexander whispered, tears in his eyes. Reynolds grinned at that._

_“Do you think your boyfriend would believe me if I said you were in danger right now? If I gave him this address. Then you could watch me have my fun with him.”_

_“I’ll do it,” Alexander whispered. Reynolds kissed him roughly, shoving his tongue into the teenager’s mouth. Alexander squeezed his eyes shut and tried to ignore the sensation._

_“Do this for me and your pretty little boyfriend gets to keep his virginity. Tell the courts today you were out of it or whatever lie you want to make up. It’s been months and they haven’t found me. Because you never told them.”_

_“Please-”_

_“Maybe you were scared. Or maybe the bitch decided it needed its master.” Reynolds whispered that, stepping closer to Alexander. One hand crept to the top of Alexander’s shirt and undid the button._

_“I didn’t- I’m not-”_

_“One call and you came running back.” Reynolds’ hand undid the next button and Alexander had to fight to stay in the moment. “Like a dog returning to its master.”_

_“N- no.”_

_“Do you agree to my terms?” Reynolds’ hands paused and Alexander stared at him. “Do you agree to not breathe a word about me?”_

_“Yes. But don’t- don’t touch my friends. Please.”_

_“Of course.” Reynolds grinned at that and he stepped in, boxing Alexander in. “People are going to be worried about where you are, you know. I think it’s time to give them a reason to worry.”_

_“You- you swore you wouldn’t!”_

_Reynolds chuckled lightly as he grabbed Alexander’s throat again._

_“I swore I wouldn’t hurt Elizabeth or Thomas. I didn’t say a word about you, bitch.”_

 

“You remember it all, don’t you?” Reynolds whispered. Alexander nodded, staring down. Reynolds smiled and reached for the boy’s right arm. Alexander tried to pull back but Reynolds held him still. “So you remember that you need a punishment.”

“Please, master, I-” Alexander was cut off as a scream ripped through his throat. Reynolds dropped his arm and stood there with a smirk on his face as Alexander fell to the floor, mouth open and gaping as he tried to rationalise quite how quickly the man had snapped his arm as if it was nothing.


	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huge angst warning for next chapter

Aaron played with the phone in his hand idly. He didn’t know what to do. He wanted to talk to his sister, of course he did. On the other hand, she had left him. She had left him to wandering hands and fists that fell far too often.

She’d known. She’d known about the bruises he’d gathered, the times he was beaten into submission. Yet she hadn’t cared. She’d left.

Aaron let out a long breath and typed the number into his phone. He raised it to his ear and let out a long breath as it rang and rang.

“Hello? Who is this?”

Aaron paused, all words vanishing. He opened his mouth before he snapped it closed again. He didn’t know what to say.

“Hello?”

“Sarah?” Aaron asked, voice hoarse. On the other end she sucked in a breath of fear.

“Timothy? How- how did you-”

“No.” Aaron let out a sigh. “Fuck, Sarah. It’s Aaron. Not- not him.”

“Aaron? How did you get this number?”

“Angelica Schuyler.”

“And Timothy?”

“He’s in jail.”

“Why?” Sarah actually sounded surprised at that and Aaron scoffed, feeling anger well up in him.

“Because he beat me within an inch of my life.” Aaron snarled out. “He wrapped wire around my neck and strangled me. He-” Aaron broke off and sucked in a breath.

“I’m sorry.”

“You left.”

“Az, I-”

“Don’t fucking call me that!” Aaron shouted. Sarah fell silent. “You- I was willing to do anything for you, Sarah! If you’d asked me then I would have let you go but you didn’t! You abandoned me and he beat me for it!”

“He raped me.” Sarah said softly. Aaron sucked in a breath and wiped away the tears gathering in his eyes. “He fucking impregnated me! I- I couldn’t stay.”

Aaron hung up.

He stared down at the phone numbly as the words ran in his head over and over.

_“Come on, Aaron.” The man whispered, stubble scratching against Aaron’s cheek. “You’ll enjoy it.”_

_“No. I- I don’t wanna.”_

_The man sighed at that and Aaron flinched. A hand descended and Aaron tensed, expecting a hit. Instead, his uncle’s hand stroked his hair ever so gently._

_“So beautiful.” He whispered. Aaron shivered. He didn’t understand why but he knew this was wrong, knew this should not be happening._

Aaron looked up as the front door slammed closed. He was on his feet in a moment and he strode into the hallway. Alexander was stood there, face pale and he was shaking slightly. Aaron could see vomit caked around the sides of his mouth and he was holding his right arm tight to his body.

“Alexander-” Aaron hurried forwards. Alexander stared up at him and burst into tears. Aaron slowed and stared down at Alexander’s arm. Halfway down, there was a dark bruise that looked agonising. It was swollen and Aaron knew it had to be killing him.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Alexander whimpered as he collapsed forwards. His voice was hoarse, as if he’d been screaming. Aaron caught him and held him for a long moment as he tried to work out what to do.

“You’re safe, Alexander. He can’t touch you here.”

Alexander froze at that and suddenly wrenched out of Aaron’s grip. He turned to the direction of the bathroom but didn’t make it more than a few steps before he was vomiting onto the cold wooden floor. Aaron bent down next to him and gently pulled the hair away from his mouth, noticing that the previous time he’d vomited someone hadn’t done that for him.

When Alexander was done he leant into Aaron. He was shivering badly and Aaron hugged him tightly, as if that could help anything.

“Tell me who it is and I can stop it.” Aaron begged. Alexander shook his head.

“They have to be safe.” Alexander whispered. Aaron sighed.

“Alexander, you’re- we’re all so worried about you. I know Laf and Thomas are missing sleep over it. Eliza’s recovery is slowing. I can barely concentrate in classes when you’re gone. I’m sorry but you’re hurting us by keeping this secret.”

“No. No.” Alexander murmured. “Meant to- I have to- I’m the best person to do this.”

“Why?”

“Because of what I am.”

“A genius?” Aaron softly kissed the top of Alexander’s head. “So fucking resilient?”

“A ten dollar whore.” Alexander whispered. Aaron sighed and shook his head.

“You’re not. I swear.”

As Alexander continued to sob in his arms, Aaron found that he had no words left to comfort the boy.

 

Thomas stared at Alexander as he walked into the classroom, Aaron beside him. James looked up as well and let out a long breath.

“Shit.”

“He’s- going through something, okay?” Thomas muttered, turning back to his work. James nodded slowly.

“He’s got a broken arm.”

Thomas snapped his head back up and scowled as he saw the cast on Alexander’s right arm. He went to stand but James grabbed him first.

“Not the time to lose your temper.” James whispered. Thomas took in a deep breath and nodded. He stared down at the desk in front of him and tried to focus on his breathing for several long moments. When he looked back up, Alexander was staring at him, something so close to longing in his eyes.

Then Alexander looked away.

 

Alexander spent lunch alone, sat on the bleachers despite the cold. He didn’t want to spend another moment in his friend’s company. The memory of Thomas holding him on the very same bleachers wouldn’t leave his head and he began to cry at some point.

“Alexander?”

Alexander snapped his head up to see Peggy stood in front of him.

“Pegs.”

“Hey. I- uh- I know we don’t- uh- talk much but I-” Peggy sighed and sat down next to Alexander. “I know something’s going on. And it- it’s hurting you.”

“I can cope.”

“You shouldn’t have to.”

“But I do.” Alexander snapped. Peggy nodded.

“You know, most people forget I’m here.” Peggy said softly. “People know the Schuyler sisters but they don’t know me. They know how brilliant Angie is and how kind ‘liza is. They- they just think I’m the last one. And when- when Eliza was attacked it- I hate myself for it but I wanted it.”

“What?” Alexander breathed out, looking at the girl in horror. Peggy sighed.

“I wasn’t the freak anymore. I wasn’t the odd one out. She- she was just freaking out and wouldn’t tell us why. She broke a guy’s nose because he put his hand on her shoulder. She screamed at dad, at all of us actually. And-” Peggy shook her head. “And for once in my fucking life I wasn’t a freak.”

“You-”

“Then we found out what had happened to her.” Peggy looked away at that. “And all I could think about was me. That I- I had been glad she’d been breaking down because it meant I wasn’t the odd one out.”

“That’s normal to want.”

“My sister was gang raped and I was glad. That’s not fucking normal.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Because all that time Eliza was quiet, I hurt her. I know I did. I called her a freak, a psycho and she called me a bitch. We- we’ve always been close but we argued so much back then that I was looking forward to her going to college so I wouldn’t need to put up with her all the time.”

“Still not your fault.”

“I know. But- I wanted to thank you, actually. You helped Liza when I couldn’t. When no-one else could. And I know it was difficult for you but you did it anyway. And I’m also here to say that I’m here. Angie’s here, Liza’s here. For when you’re ready to talk.”

“About what?”

“About the men who’re raping you.” Alexander looked away at that and Peggy sighed. “Good thing about not talking, I hear plenty.”

“It’s not what you think.”

“I think it’s exactly what I think. And I think you know it is.”

“Pegs-”

“We’ll be here when you can talk about it.” With that, Peggy left. Alexander stared after her for a moment before he sighed and let his head fall down.

 

Two weeks passed before everything came to a head. Alexander had been steadily gaining weight at a rate that amazed Martha and worried Aaron. He knew there was no way Alexander was eating properly, especially not when he threw up so often.

Alexander turned up to Eliza’s house early in the day. She’d said something about a flashback and Reynolds and Adams didn’t need him for several more hours. So he hurried to her house.

He knocked on the door and waited for several long moments. When the door finally opened it felt like Alexander had been punched in the gut. Reynolds stood there with a smile on his face. Alexander stared up at him in horror and Reynolds just continued to smile.

“And who might you be?” Reynolds asked, as if Alexander couldn’t still feel his hands wandering across him or the pipe Reynolds had shoved down his throat the previous night or the-

“Alexander!” Peggy called out. She rushed forwards and hugged him. Reynolds arched one eyebrow and Alexander paused. “Are you okay?”

“Ye-yeah. Eliza? She- uh- asked for me?”

“Oh, yeah. Tim,” Peggy turned to address Reynolds. “I’ve told you about Alexander, right?”

“Alexander Hamilton? A pleasure to meet you.” Reynolds held his hand out and Alexander forced him to hold his left arm out, trying to ignore how badly it shook or how Reynolds gripped it just a bit too hard.

“Wh-who are you?”

“Tim is Eliza’s private tutor.” Peggy closed the door behind Alexander and ushered him through the house.

“Private tutor?” Alexander muttered. Reynolds grinned and Alexander felt faint. He’d heard the threats enough times to know what Reynolds and Adams had promised but he’d managed to keep some sliver of hope, some slight wish that maybe, just maybe, they couldn’t really be acted on.

But Reynolds spent hours alone with Eliza every week.

“Is that something you’re interested in?” Reynolds asked, a smile playing across his face. Alexander shuddered and shook his head. Peggy, in front of him, didn’t see his reaction. “Well, if that’s the case do you want to have a quick chat with me?”

“I- I should talk to Eliza.”

“This will only take a moment.” Reynolds promised. “Or we could go see Eliza.”

“N-no, that’s okay. I- I’ll talk to you.”

Reynolds smiled and gently pulled Alexander into a different room. The moment the door was closed, Reynolds was on him, kissing and biting at the skin just below Alexander’s collar. Alexander whimpered and tried to get free but Reynolds just pinned him against the wall.

When he finally broke for breath Reynolds smiled down at Alexander.

“What are you doing here?” Alexander asked, fear evident in his voice. Reynolds grinned.

“John and I had a talk. We decided we don’t like how much time our slut spends away from us.”

“Please-”

“And we don’t want to wait until you’re eighteen. So we looked into alternatives. I believe Adams is tracking down a certain Aaron Burr right now.”

“No! No! Please!”

“Shh, little bitch. There are always alternatives.” With that, Reynolds began to whisper, almost lovingly. Alexander felt tears streaking down his face as he shakily nodded.


	33. Chapter 33

Alexander grabbed for a jumper blindly and shoved it into his bag. He couldn’t let himself think about what he was doing, what he was allowing to be done.

“Alexander?” Aaron’s soft voice made Alexander freeze. He slowly turned to face his friend who was staring at him. “What are you doing?”

“Nothing.” Alexander mumbled. Aaron stepped forwards and gently touched Alexander’s neck. His quick movements had forced his top to slip down slightly and Aaron could see the line of bites and hickies.

“We can help you.”

“No.”

“Alexander-”

“No.”

“Please.”

“No.”

“Alexander-”

“How many fucking times do I have to day no until-”

“Until I believe you.” Aaron stated. Alexander glared at him and turned away. He hefted the bag onto his back. Aaron growled and grabbed his wrist which made Alexander jump. “Everyone is downstairs and we just want to talk-”

“Fuck off.”

Alexander wrenched his arm free and strode down the stairs. He was then met with the faces of Lafayette, Thomas, Angelica, John and Hercules. Alexander let out an annoyed huff before he strode towards the door. Thomas stepped in the way and blocked him. Alexander glared up at him.

“I’m not letting you run off again.”

Alexander took a step back and stared at the gathered people.

“So what, you just gather here every time you can?”

“Alexander, who’s threatening you?” John asked, trying to be gentle. Alexander stared at him and scoffed.

“Fuck off.”

“Alexander-”

“I don’t need help from someone like you!”

“The hell do you mean by that?” John growled, stepping forward. Alexander pushed himself up to his full height.

“We all know you’re a few months away from being disowned, John. Everyone knows your dad can’t put up with you.”

“My dad’s a homophobic piece of trash.” John growled out. “Remember?”

“No, he just couldn’t put up with having a son as pathetic as you.”

“Hey, cut it out.” Hercules said, warningly. Alexander turned to him with a feral look in his eyes.

“None of you get to tell me what to do! You’re pathetic and broken and worthless! You’ve had a fucking crush on Laf for the last three years and never fucking mentioned it to him!” Hercules’ eyes widened and he glanced at Lafayette who was staring at Alexander in confusion. “Because he doesn’t feel the same way, Herc! You’re a friend. Nothing more. You’ll never be more.”

“Alexander, I get that you’re upset but-”

“Upset?” Alexander cut off Hercules. “I’m not upset, I’m so fucking free right now. Because I don’t have to pretend to give two shits anymore! Your pining over Laf was fucking painful! Every moment was just Laf this, Laf that. I was surprised you didn’t just fuck him when you got the chance!”

“He was drunk.” Hercules shook his head. “I would never-”

“Really?” Alexander snarled. Hercules’ mouth fell open, at the thought that one of his best friends didn’t even know he wouldn’t do that.

“You do not need to insult us.” Lafayette said softly. Alexander glared at him.

“What I should accept your help? Help from a cross dressing freak like you?” Alexander spat the words out and Lafayette recoiled.

“That’s enough.” Thomas cut in. Alexander stared at him and he looked sad for a moment.

“What the fuck are you even doing here? I told you I didn’t want you. Still ignoring what I want?”

“If I think you’re lying, yes. Don’t try to fucking debate me, Alexander. We both know I’m better.” Thomas stepped forwards and Alexander stared at him.

“Better at everything, aren’t you? How many fucking times did you imagine pinning me down?” Alexander spat out. Thomas scowled at that. “But you didn’t have to imagine. You watched the videos. You saw me beaten down. You saw me raped! And now I’m meant to trust you?”

“You asked me-”

“And I asked those men to fuck me! It doesn’t mean I fucking wanted it. Your head is so far up your own ass you can’t possibly imagine a world where you don’t play centre stage well guess what! I don’t love you! I don’t give a shit about you. I’ll be glad when I never see you again. It means I get to stop watching my back for my next fucking rapist.”

Thomas stared at Alexander open-mouthed at that. A flash of shame came across Alexander’s face but it was gone in a moment. He turned to leave but Aaron caught his arm.

“And you-” Alexander paused for a moment as he turned to face Aaron, for a moment something so close to sadness crossed his eyes.

“Alexander-”

“Your Uncle. Was he really that fuckable?”

Aaron felt his heart stop at the words. He stared at Alexander numbly.

“Aaron?” Angelica asked quietly. Aaron didn’t say a word, couldn’t say a word. Alexander let out a harsh laugh.

“You’re shit at lying, Burr. I know what he did to you. I know he fucked you and I know the real reason you ran was because you fucking wanted it. Not because he hurt you or because he nearly killed you. Because you wanted someone to give a damn about whether or not you died. Look around. Look at how easily Laf turned on you. Look how easily all of my friends turned because you can’t even fucking make friends! You just latched onto me like the fucking parasite you are.”

Aaron’s eyes were full of tears as Alexander finished his tirade. Alexander sucked in a breath and if Aaron didn’t know better then he would have said there were tears in Alexander’s eyes as well.

“You disgust me, Burr. A freak who can’t even control himself before he fucks his family members. You-”

“That’s enough!” Angelica shouted. Alexander turned to her, a wild look in her eyes.

“Says who? The worthless sister? Eliza was raped and you didn’t fucking notice for a month! She called Jefferson when she tried to kill herself! She opened up to me! You did nothing! You can’t do anything!”

“That’s not true.” Angelica murmured. Alexander scoffed.

“You’re pathetic, Angelica. You try to help everyone and you can’t do anything. You’re worthless. I’m glad you’re not my friend.”

“Alexander, please.” Aaron’s voice broke as he spoke and Alexander paused. He closed his eyes and turned back to the group. “Please, just-”

“No. I’m happy now. I’m putting on the weight I couldn’t with you. I’m with the man I love.” Alexander glanced at Thomas for a moment who glared back. Alexander shrugged. “I don’t need any of you.”

With that, he left, silence in his wake.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So you know how I finished this fic and was so proud of it? Well I didn't like a bit of the fic so I asked someone to look it over AND THEY MADE UP A BETTER ENDING.  
> So, I'm now rewriting the end of this fic and idk how long it'll be. Hey, on the upside it got angstier!


	34. Chapter 34

Aaron stumbled from the hallway and into the living room. He felt his back hit the wall and his legs collapsed underneath him.

“Aaron?” Angelica called out, hurrying into the room. He stared ahead of him, feeling his breath speeding up but unsure of what he should do to stop that. “Aaron, listen to me. It’s all going to be fine, okay?”

_“I promise it’ll be fine, Az. We’re gonna get out.”_

“Aaron you have to listen to me, you’re having a panic attack.”

_“Where will we go?”_

“You need to listen to my breathing and try to copy it. Aaron? Aaron!”

“ _Anywhere. Just- just not here._ ”

“Aaron, everything’s okay. You just need to calm down and-”

_“Can we be pirates?”_

“That’s it, come on. Come on.”

_“Captain Az. I like it. Yeah, we can be pirates.”_

“It’s going to be okay, Aaron.”

_“Can we leave soon? I don’t- I don’t like your bruises.”_

_“Yeah, Az. We- we can leave soon.”_

“Aaron?” Angelica whispered. Aaron slowly opened his eyes and stared at her. “What Alexander said. It- it wasn’t- was it real?” Aaron let out a whimper before he slowly nodded. “Oh my God.”

“He- he never- I didn’t think Alexander knew.” Aaron whispered. “I thought- I never knew.”

“But did your uncle…”

“I never let him. But he- he’d touch me. He was always- he undressed me. When he tried I was-” Aaron curled in on himself.

“Go on, Aaron. You’re safe.”

“I was too tight.” Aaron whispered. Angelica flinched. “It hurt. I- I fought back. So then he just wound a- wound wire around my neck and strangled me. He tied me to the bed and left me. The next morning he- he promised he’d do it again until- until it worked.”

“And you never told Alexander?”

“That day I showed him the wire. He got me out of the house and- I thought I was safe.”

“You are.” Angelica promised. Aaron nodded shakily.

“You were never meant to know.”

“Why did you never tell anyone?”

“I wasn’t- I wasn’t ever raped.” Aaron whispered. “He didn’t- I wasn’t- I’m not- I’m not a rape victim. He- he hurt me but it wasn’t- wasn’t…”

“Rape is insertion of something without the person’s consent.” Aaron looked away. “Were you raped?”

“I don’t- I don’t-” Aaron stared down at his hands. “I didn’t think he knew,” Aaron croaked out, tears in his eyes.

“Alexander’s smart.”

“Sarah didn’t know. He only started after.”

“Why?”

“He made me grow my hair out. He- he made me starve. He made me wear female things.” Aaron shook his head. “I knew Sarah had been raped. I- I knew.”

“I’m so sorry. I would never have let her go.”

“You should have. She- she had to get out.”

“She didn’t get to leave you behind.”

“I never wanted it.” Aaron muttered. “I never- I never wanted to sleep with him. I didn’t like it when he touched me or- or when he did any of that. I hated it. I begged him to stop but he never did. Not without a punishment.”

“I’m sorry.” Angelica sighed. “Have you ever- have you ever talked to someone about it?”

“No. Not even the police. I couldn’t.”

“You could now. I- I’ll be there if you want me to be. I can- if you go to the police I can testify for Sarah’s abuse.”

“No. She- she got out. I don’t want to bring her back. Not to this.”

“She left you to be raped. If she even had a clue then-”

“He never wanted me. He wanted her. I was just- a warm body. A stand-in. He wanted her.”

“That doesn’t make abandoning you better.” Angelica let out a long sigh before she slowly stood and offered a hand down to Aaron. Aaron took it and stood on weak legs. “That’s why you reacted so strongly to Alexander’s abuse, isn’t it?”

“I- I’m normal for the most part but every so often I- I just freeze up.”

“Why?”

“Because then he’d make sure it didn’t hurt that much. If I fought he’d pull my hair or- or hit me or beat me. It was easier to smile and just- just say nothing.”

“You’re safe now. You don’t have to do that shit anymore. I swear.”

Aaron nodded numbly and stared at the door. He slowly walked towards it and opened it. The corridor fell silent as the rest of the teenagers turned to stare at him. Aaron paused and stared down at the floor for a long moment. He then saw Lafayette step forwards slowly. Aaron snapped his head up.

“Please tell me he was lying,” Lafayette said softly. Aaron stared at him for a long moment. Then he looked down to the floor. Lafayette made a half strangled noise and tried to move forwards. He paused halfway through the action, as if unsure of what to do.

“He never raped me.” Aaron whispered. They all heard it perfectly in the silence of the room. “He- he never got that far. I got out first. Alexander got me out first.”

“By how much?” Hercules asked. Aaron stared at him. “How- how many more days until- how-” For once, the boy seemed lost for words. Aaron bit his lip.

“He’d have tried again that night. And the- the next morning. And the night after. He promised me that he wouldn’t- wouldn’t ever stop.”

“You were fifteen.” John muttered, mostly to himself. “How- I don’t understand.”

“He raped my sister. He- he got her pregnant. She’s two years older than me so she- she was old enough. I wasn’t. I- I was so fucking young.” Aaron took in a shaky breath and shook his head. He could feel their gazes on him. “When I found out Alexander was- I couldn’t- I couldn’t cope with the idea he was being forced into that. But I never wanted it! I- I would never- I fought and I didn’t want it!” His voice broke slightly and he had to suck in a breath as tears rolled down his eyes. Lafayette stepped forwards again and hugged him close.

“I believe you, Aaron.” Lafayette whispered. Aaron clung onto him as tears streamed down his face as he released what had been pent up for the last two years.

 

Eliza sat at the school lunch table, staring down at the food in front of her. None of the table were talking, too busy wrapped up in the emptiness of Alexander’s seat. It almost hurt to see it empty. It was just yesterday that they’d had a normal conversation, a talk about Eliza making up with her father. He’d seemed a bit distracted but for the most part he was fine.

“Do we know where Alexander is?” Eliza asked softly. Angelica tensed and glanced at Aaron who looked down.

“Probably with Adams.” Thomas growled out. He clenched his hand into a fist. James glanced down and gently put his hand over his friend’s fist. Thomas took in a deep breath and released it, calming himself down. James then removed his hand.

“Should we- should we go to Washington?” Eliza asked.

“Father knows.” Lafayette sighed. “He knows and yet cannot do anything. He- Alexander is not breaking any laws. The police cannot help. Foster care would remove him from our household and- and it is likely it would just put him into an abusive household.”

“Or at the best, somewhere without a support network.” Thomas added. “Without us.”

“So we just wait?” Eliza asked, horror in her voice.

Aaron sighed and stared at the empty seat.

“We wait.”

 

Lafayette woke with a start and stared around the dark room for a long moment. He let out a long breath before he stood on shaky legs. The image of Alexander’s empty eyes haunted him, his nightmares about Alexander weren’t uncommon but they weren’t exactly nice.

Especially not when he knew it could be so real.

He had no idea how to help Alexander and it terrified him. He knew that if he was in the same position then Alexander would be fighting like hell to get him free but he wasn’t. He was stuck watching as one of his closest friends fell apart day by day.

With that thought in mind, Lafayette crept out of his room and made his way to Alexander’s room. The boy often stumbled back in late at night and it was the time he was most agreeable to talk. When Lafayette pushed the door open he sighed.

Alexander wasn’t in his bed.

Instead Aaron was curled up on top of the sheets, still fully clothed. He was mumbling in his sleep and moving slightly. Lafayette made his way across the room softly and sat down next to him. He wanted to stroke the teenager’s head, bring him back to a more comforting area of dreamland, but he knew better now.

“Aaron.” Lafayette whispered. “Aaron.”

Aaron woke with a start and gasped as he looked around in pure confusion. His eyes landed on Lafayette and he relaxed.

“Laf?”

“You fell asleep. Waiting for Alexander, I presume.”

“He’s still not back?” Aaron sat up and stared around the room. “What’s the time?”

“It has gone three. You need to get to sleep.”

“No. I can- I can wait a bit longer.”

“You are exhausted.”

“I can’t just- just abandon him!” Aaron let his head lie back down on the pillow as he tried to stifle a yawn. “Need to look after him.”

“You must look after yourself. He has not yet been out all night. He always returns.”

“But that argument-”

“Was something he made up simply to escape. I do not believe he meant any of it. Especially what he said about you.”

“He was right.” Aaron said softly. “I mean I didn’t- I hated what my uncle did but at least- fuck. At least he looked at me. He told me he loved me. He- he cared.” Aaron closed his eyes and let out a long breath. “If Alexander hadn’t gotten me out then I would have let him sleep with me. I- I know that.”

“You were too young to consent.” Lafayette pulled Aaron into a hug. “You were an orphan whose sibling had abandoned you. No-one would expect you to reject love even when it came at such a high price.”

“Rape isn’t a high price. It’s-”

“It was the price he requested for his love. But that is not love.” Lafayette sighed. “That is hatred and manipulation and everything that happens when love decays.”

“I loved him. And I hated him. And I don’t know what to do,” Aaron whispered, sounding helpless.

“For now? Go to your room and sleep.” Lafayette released Aaron and sat back. “School is tomorrow.”

“Yeah.” Aaron smiled tiredly at Lafayette. “Thanks, Laf.”

“Come.” Lafayette stood and led Aaron out of the room. Aaron followed willingly.

When Lafayette eventually got back to sleep his dreams were empty of Alexander’s dead eyes and instead full of Aaron’s gentle smile, the one Lafayette knew was finally real.

 

Aaron woke slowly. He stared around and it took him a long moment to come back to himself. When it did he heaved himself out of bed. He was exhausted, a mix of staying up half the night waiting for Alexander and worrying over him for the rest of the time.

He made his way down the hallway and knocked gently on Alexander’s door. He waited a moment and sighed as he received no answer.

“Alexander? Are you okay? I- I need to talk to you. Alexander?” Aaron frowned as he still heard no response. He carefully pushed the door open and froze as he took in the empty bed. Aaron stared around the room and felt his heartrate speed up.

Aaron stepped out of the room and ran down the stairs. He crashed into the dining room and once more found it empty of the only important member.

“Aaron? What’s wrong?” Martha stood and stepped closer but Aaron just shook his head. He stared at Lafayette in pure terror.

“Aaron?”

“He was carrying a bag.” Aaron blurted out. His hand slipped underneath his sleeve and he began to scratch at his skin without even noticing. Lafayette scowled and gently tugged the hand away.

“What is wrong?”

“He was carrying a bag. He was- he had a bag. He had- he had clothes in it. Fuck. Fuck.” Aaron stared in front of him, his breath speeding up with every inhale.

“Calm down, frère.” Lafayette tried to calm Aaron but he couldn’t.

“He’s run away.” Aaron whimpered. Lafayette froze. “He’s run away, Laf!”


	35. Chapter 35

The police arrived within the hour. Aaron had just about managed to calm down and Thomas, Hercules, John, Eliza and Angelica were in the house. Thomas was the first to give his statement, faltering as he did so.

“Can you think why he might have run away?” The police officer asked. Thomas stared at him for a moment before he sighed.

“Alexander- he’s being- he’s being blackmailed. By his ex-step-father. John Adams.”

“Do you know what form this threat took?”

“No. I- I think it was an exchange of sexual favours for- for something. He never told me. No matter how much I begged him.”

“And how did you know Alexander, again?”

“He was my boyfriend. Before- well, after- it was-” Thomas sighed. “He was raped by Adams and his mother’s life was threatened. Then Adams was arrested and we started dating. Then on the day of Adams’ trial Alexander started acting differently. He was attacked and raped by someone. They didn’t find out who.”

“You have suspicions?”

“I don’t know. Alexander- he only ever talked about Adams. I mean, he barely talked about the people who did it to him.”

“People?”

“He was forced into prostitution. If- if he didn’t raise enough money then his mother would be killed. He’s told the police about it before. I know he has.”

“Okay, I’ll look into it. The day of the trial though?”

“He- he lied. He committed perjury. He said that he loved Adams, that he had never been raped and that Adams was the real victim.” Thomas scoffed. “I confronted him about it and he told me that he hated me and had been using me. I know Alexander, I know he was lying.”

“And was Adams freed?”

“Yeah. Since then, Alexander’s been- not Alexander. He’s been skipping out on everything. His attendance is down. He hardly ever finishes his homework. He doesn’t concentrate in class. He- before this he was in the AP class for the year above. He’s so fucking smart but something’s happened. I know it has.”

“Thank you.” The man stood and Thomas sighed.

“What are the chances you’re going to find him? The- the real chances?”

“I don’t know. But you can’t give up hope.”

 

When the police were gone, giving only empty promises, Angelica felt her phone buzz. She stared down at it numbly.

**From: S**

**Why did you tell him**

**From: S**

**I trusted you**

Angelica stared down at it and felt anger building in her. She couldn’t help her friends. She couldn’t help her sister. She couldn’t help Aaron, couldn’t even see how badly he’d been hurt.

But goddamn, she wasn’t going to take that lying down.

Angelica stood and walked up the stairs to one of the spare guestrooms. She punched in Sarah’s number and waited almost patiently for the call to go through. It took several long moments but eventually the ringing stopped.

“Angelica.” Sarah stated.

“You fucking bitch.” Angelica spat out. “You knew! You fucking knew and you lied to me!”

“I-”

“He was being hit and you didn’t do anything! He’s your little brother and-”

“And if I tried to get him out then it would have taken too long!” Sarah argued back. Angelica shook her head.

“Time? That was what you were worried about?”

“You don’t understand what it was like there. He-”

“Aaron was raped!” Angelica shouted. Sarah was silent for several long moments at that as Angelica attempted to gather herself. “Aaron was raped.” Angelica repeated, voice softer. “He was beaten and then he was raped. When he said no your uncle strangled him and nearly killed him. He was forced into looking like you so he was attractive to your uncle. That’s what you left your little brother to, Sarah.”

“I didn’t- I…” Sarah trailed off and Angelica scoffed.

“I’d die for my sisters, Sarah. I know I would. If I even- if I even fucking imagined that was happening I would never have left. I couldn’t have.”

“Well fucking great for you.” Sarah hissed out. “You didn’t fucking get put in my situation. I’m sorry Aaron was raped but he should have got out.”

“What?”

“I did it. Why didn’t he?”

“He was fifteen!”

“I was sixteen when he started.”

“And you had me to get you out! Aaron had no-one!”

“I’m sorry about that but- Angelica, my life there is over. I’m not Sarah anymore. I’m Sally, okay? I have a child and a boyfriend and I’m fucking happy. And I’ve fought for this and I hope Aaron will get something like it but- he’s not my brother. He’s Sarah’s brother. And Sarah’s dead.”

“Fuck you.” Angelica spat out before hanging up. She stared at the phone for a moment before she forced herself to take in a deep breath. If Sarah wasn’t going to be the older sister she should be then Angelica would be.

It was about time she made up for her past sins with the Burr family, after all.

 

“They’re searching Adams’ house.” Aaron muttered quietly. Angelica frowned at the volume and Lafayette sighed.

“You were loud.”

“I’m so sorry, Aaron. I-”

“I’m guessing she’s not coming back?” Aaron asked. Angelica shook her head and he nodded. “Probably for the better. Did you ever- did you ever get a picture of her baby?”

“No.”

“My nephew.” Aaron frowned for a moment. “My cousin.”

“Aaron-”

“Tell me when they have something.” Aaron asked as he stood. Lafayette caught his arm as he left and Aaron flinched back.

“Do you want company?” Lafayette asked softly. Aaron nodded slowly and Lafayette rose and left the room as well.

There was silence behind them once more.

 

Thomas sat on Alexander’s bed, staring around the room. If everything had been right then he would have spent a lot of time in this room, would have hung out with Alexander as the boy slowly healed until they could use the room for other purposes.

But then Adams got in the way.

Thomas pulled his phone out and typed in Alexander’s number. He pressed call and waited patiently. It rang and rang until the voicemail started up.

“It’s Thomas.” Thomas muttered. “I mean- I guess, obviously. And I- I just wanted- look, I don’t know where you are and I’m terrified but- when- when you’re safe please come home. Please come back to me. I can do anything you need. I- please, Alexander. I’m so scared and I need you.”

Thomas hung up and let his head hang down. He let out a long sigh that never seemed to end.

 

The police didn’t return for another three hours, at which point Angelica had been called home by a panicking Eliza and John’s father had ordered him home. Hercules had left with him.

When the knock at the door came, Thomas stood and hurried forwards. He wrenched the door open and deflated visibly when Alexander wasn’t on the other side.

“Mr Jefferson?”

“Yeah. I-” Before Thomas had to say anything else, Washington was there.

“Go into the living room, son.”

“But-”

“I think it’s better you’re not here right now.”

“Sir-”

“Now, Thomas.”

Thomas nodded numbly and walked back to the living room. He sank down into a chair and waited, not feeling connected to reality, as Washington spoke in the other room. Then the front door swung closed again and Washington stepped back into the room.

He looked old and he took a long moment to begin speaking.

“The police have searched Adams’ house. There’s no evidence that Alexander is there. Even if there was, the police cannot stop the relationship. Alexander is over the age of consent so it’s legal.”

“He’s being abused!” Lafayette exclaimed. Washington sighed.

“I believe he is. But I also believe that Adams is not breaking the law. Adams has said that if he sees Alexander then he will talk to the police. I don’t believe him for a second. So we must be vigilant. We must look out for him at every moment. Anything we remember that sounded suspicious, you tell me.”

“And what do we do now?”

“Nothing. The police said that there is a significant chance that Alexander chose to go. They won’t put in excess resources to bring back a troubled teenager with potential criminal charges behind him who doesn’t want to come back.”

“We have to get him back.” Aaron said, voice shaking. Washington sighed.

“We have to let him come back to us, Aaron.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey I finished the rewrite of the ending to this! So uh now it's sad and angsty and currently 47 chapters tho that might change


	36. Chapter 36

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So for anyone wondering here and onwards is where all of my changes come into play. In the original Alexander runs to Reynolds' house to protect his friends. My friend read that and asked why he'd do something that dumb and I explained that it was because low self esteem, desperation not to fail someone else like his mother, terror of being abandoned etc but then realised I didn't like it and it makes more sense for him to do what he does in this chapter.

Alexander pulled his jumper tighter around him as he strode down the street. It was freezing and his right arm was aching with the drop in temperature. His eyes darted around untrustingly. He’d been on the streets a week and every day was worse.

He rounded the corner until he came to a familiar coffee shop. He smiled at the sight and at the warmth that passed over him as he entered the building. He walked up to the counter and quietly ordered a black coffee, counting out the change he had and sighing as he realised it was nowhere near enough to last him indefinitely.

As he took the coffee and sat at one of the booths he began to chew pensively on his lip. It had been a split second decision in the end. Reynolds had whispered into his ear that he needed to go to Adams’ house, that he was going to live with them, be their slut constantly and Alexander had been so ready to accept it.

His friends would have been safe, the people he loved could have not had to suffer a day more. Aaron wouldn’t be stalked by Adams and Eliza could have her rapist out of the house.

Instead Alexander had just run. He’d ditched his phone quickly enough and hadn’t bothered with a credit card that could be traced. The money he’d made while his mother was alive he’d kept on him and it was what was keeping him alive.

It was what had been keeping him alive. He knew that he only had a few more days before his money ran out and to stop that he needed a job. Some kind of shelter would also be nice, something to stop the layers of frost that settled on him every morning. He knew that hypothermia was a real risk and it was beyond possible that he could just not wake up one morning.

So he needed a house and a job. And he somehow needed to get them without alerting anyone that he was a runaway foster child. If Washington tracked him down then Alexander would have to face Lafayette and Aaron. At the thought of Aaron, Alexander felt tears in his eyes.

He’d known it would hurt Aaron to have those words thrown at him, the implications that he’d allowed and encourage his uncle’s abuse. Nothing could have prepared Alexander for the look on Aaron’s face when it actually happened though.

Alexander had been Aaron’s one ally through it all and then he’d thrown it all away just so he could run off. Alexander didn’t even know if Aaron was safe. Alexander rubbed at his eyes and sniffled gently.

“Here you go, sweetie.”

Alexander jumped at the voice and turned to stare at the woman above him. She was wearing a blood red cardigan that almost detracted from the black eye she had. Almost.

She’d just placed down a slice of chocolate cake and Alexander stared at it numbly before he glanced back up at her.

“Wh-what?”

“The baby ain’t making cravings easy for me. Walked in here desperate for a piece but can’t stomach it now. Looks like you could do with it.”

“Thanks,” Alexander mumbled. He wiped at his eyes and saw the woman frown.

“You alright?”

“Bad week. Bad fucking year- bad- fuck.” Alexander shook his head. “Sorry, do you wanna sit down?”

The woman sat down opposite Alexander and stared at him for a moment before she pulled a tissue from her bag. He blew his nose and then lay back against the chair.

“I’m Maria,” Maria leant forwards and Alexander noticed the baby bump she was sporting for the first time. He shook her hand and smiled.

“Alexander.”

“Wanna tell me what’s got you crying into a black coffee?”

“I- I said some stuff to a friend that he- he won’t forgive me for. And he shouldn’t.”

“Well why’d you say it then?”

“Because if I didn’t, he’d be hurt.”

“Sounds to me like that’s the best reason to not be forgiven,” Maria smiled gently and Alexander frowned. “There are people in my life who won’t forgive me for plenty of stuff, nothing as good as trying to protect them.”

“How’d you get the black eye?” Alexander asked softly. Maria’s smile dropped and she raised a tentative hand to her eye.

“Didn’t- didn’t realise it was still there.”

“So I guess you tried to cover it up,” Alexander muttered as he pulled the cake closer to him. He wasn’t stupid enough to look a gift horse in the mouth. Stupid enough to do just about everything else but not that, not now. “You have a wedding ring but didn’t use his surname. You’re pregnant but you’ve got bruising around your wrists as if someone tried to drag you around. I’m guessing abusive husband.”

“He’s not abusive.” Maria sighed. “He don’t mean it, he just got a short temper sometimes.”

“They don’t just have a fucking short temper. They’re lying pieces of shits that-” Alexander broke off and shook his head. “My mama lived with an abusive husband for years. He hit me and made me hide it. He-” Alexander broke off again and shook his head. “For the sake of your baby, get the fuck out of there. It’s better to live on the streets than with someone like that.”

“Is that what you’re doing?” Maria asked softly. Alexander nodded slowly.

“It got a lot worse for me. The fuckers didn’t stop at physical abuse.” Alexander wasn’t sure why he said that but by Maria’s sharp intake of breath she understood perfectly. Alexander shook his head. “Anything’s better.”

“Here.” Maria passed a small bit of paper to Alexander. Alexander stared down at a house address and a phone number. “I- I can’t help you much but maybe-”

“Thanks,” Alexander whispered. Maria smiled weakly.

It took until Maria was gone for Alexander to realise he’d managed to get through the entire slice of chocolate cake. His eating habits had fallen into a full blown disorder when he hadn’t been looking and eating anything solid was nothing short of a miracle.

Alexander stayed in his seat until long after his coffee was gone, just trying to work out what he could do next. He could try to move down south, somewhere warmer and easier to survive the winter. But that came with its own challenges in the inevitable summer and while he didn’t look forwards to dying of hypothermia he wouldn’t want to die of heatstroke either.

He couldn’t spend too much time bouncing around the country either or people would start asking questions. He knew that the best plan would be to settle down and blend into the massive city as if he was nothing.

“Sir, unless you’re gonna buy another drink can you please leave?” The waitress asked, bored. Alexander stared down at his empty cup before he slowly stood.

“S-sorry,” Alexander whispered as he left the café. He felt guilt wrench at his gut as he realised he couldn’t even afford to leave a tip.

The cold winter air bit at him and Alexander shivered. His warmest clothes were back in Washington’s house.

Back in safety. Where he didn’t belong.

 

Alexander stared out over the empty parking lot. It was better to not have the snow falling on him but he was still so nervous. Sounds echoed around the parking lot and he knew that if he was found he could be dragged to a police station and returned to the Washingtons.

If he went back there, back where there was warmth and food and love then he’d be walking back into Adams and Reynolds’ waiting arms. Or onto their cocks.

Alexander would prefer freezing to death than going back to those men.

As the night crawled on, Alexander continued to shiver. He pulled from his bag Aaron’s red hoodie and pulled it tight around himself. He had no idea what time it was but he had to hope that it would be enough to keep him warm through the night.

At some point Alexander had half dozed off. He knew that because he was suddenly roughly awoken by laughs echoing around the parking lot. He shifted slowly and sat up to see a group of young adults stumbling in his general direction. Several of them were holding some kind of bottle in their hands and Alexander cowered back.

But on the other hand, if they were drunk…

Alexander struggled to his feet and pressed his bag into the shadows. He stumbled forwards and then the group stopped slowly.

“D-do any of you have change? Please?” Alexander asked, knowing how pathetic he looked. One of the men in front of him started to laugh and Alexander flinched back. He took a step back but before he could get anywhere one of the men grabbed him. Alexander whimpered and the group laughed.

Alexander felt his breathing speed up and he glanced around him as he tried to work out how to escape.

“You trying to steal our money?” One of the men drunkenly slurred out.

“N-no! I was just-” Alexander broke off as he was slapped across the face.

“Just a filthy immigrant trying to steal our money and our jobs,” the man hissed. Alexander’s eyes widened as he realised no-one would look for him. Adams and Reynolds would miss their whore, Alexander’s friends would forget the disappointment easily.

One of the men kicked out at his knees and Alexander collapsed into a kneeling position. He stared up at the men, barely concealing his terror.

“Please-” Alexander whispered. One of the other men grabbed his hair and yanked his head back and Alexander tried to desperately fight back.

“Hold him still, I know how to punish him.” One of the men grinned as he spoke. Alexander whimpered and continued to fight. He was punched across the face for his effort and he felt his lip begin to bleed. He felt a zipper come undone and he tensed. He looked up just in time for a stream of warm liquid to hit him in the face.

He choked in revulsion and tried to turn away but he was trapped as he felt the urine dribbling down his face, onto his clothes.

“Get it in his hair,” One of the men muttered and it was followed by laughs. Alexander began to sob as he felt the warm liquid soak his hair. Then the man was finished and he stepped away. Alexander blinked and stared up, feeling warm liquid in his eyelashes and dribbling down his face.

He saw the man back away, only for another man to step forwards.

“No, no, please- please-” Alexander snapped his mouth shut just in time as the next man began to piss in his hair, causing the warm liquid to stream down his back and soak his spine. Man after man stepped up and at some point Alexander stopped fighting. He just remained kneeling there, knowing he was a few seconds away from being beaten if he tried to get away.

When the men were finally done, one of them spat down at Alexander who flinched back. The men laughed before one of them stepped forwards.

“Look up.” A man said softly. Alexander remained staring at the ground trying to hide his tears until a sudden kick to his ribs made him arch up. “Look at me,” the man commanded as he slowly poured a beer over Alexander’s head. Then he threw the bottle down, some of the shards catching Alexander. Alexander whimpered and the man laughed before he strode off.

Alexander was left soaking wet in a puddle. He leant over himself and began to sob. He was filthy, inside and out. He could taste the urine in his mouth and he leant forwards and vomited into the puddle around him, again and again until he could finally focus more on the pain in his throat than the revulsion covering him.

He eventually dragged himself from the mix of vomit, urine and beer until he was leaning against the wall again. The smell was horrible and he couldn’t bear it. He grabbed his bag and ran from the parking lot to a public bathroom not too far away. It was deserted which he was thankful for as he stripped down.

Alexander then grabbed a clean t-shirt and began washing himself clean of all the filth covering him. The water was icy cold and he couldn’t stop shivering. When he finally reached his hair he had to push his head underneath the tap and ignore the shivers running through him as he did that.

He stared at himself in the mirror and whimpered softly. He was still filthy. He couldn’t clean himself properly, couldn’t do anything. He was a minor lost in a city that didn’t want to do anything to do with him. If he went home he’d be dragged to Adams’ house and raped, bent over every surface and fucked and beaten and hurt until Alexander wanted to die.

If he stayed on the street then he could be assaulted again and next time they might hurt him worse more than just a few bruises. He had nowhere to go and nothing could save him.

Alexander went to stuff the dirty clothes into a plastic bag but paused. His hands ran over the sodden red jumper. He slowly raised it to his nose and felt another wave of tears hit him as he realised that Aaron’s smell was long gone, hidden by the filth that Alexander had forced onto it.

He curled up on the floor of the bathroom and covered his eyes as he began to sob into the silence, wishing that there was an answer.

 

Alexander stared up at the rundown apartment in front of him before he took a deep breath in and stepped inside. The landlord’s apartment was clearly marked and Alexander slowly knocked on the door and waited patiently. The door swung open and a man not much taller than Alexander stood there.

“What do you want, kid?”

“I- I want to buy an apartment,” Alexander stated. The man chuckled and went to close the door but Alexander jammed his foot in the way. “Please sir. I- I won’t make trouble. I’ll- I’ll keep quiet and keep it tidy and I won’t break anything! I just- I just need an apartment, please.”

“How old are you, kid?”

“Eighteen.”

“Yeah, right.” The man went to shut the door but Alexander pushed back and stepped into the room. The man scowled at him and Alexander felt his breath coming too fast as he realised what he was about to do. It made sense after all. There was only one thing he was.

“I can make it worth your while, master,” Alexander all but purred out. The man’s eyes widened as Alexander closed the door and sank to his knees. “I can do whatever you want.”

“And if I’m not a faggot?” The man spat the word out and Alexander flinched. He took in a steadying breath before he looked back up.

“Then use me however you like. Hit me, rape me, use me, show me my place, I can do anything,” Alexander whispered. The man’s brows furrowed.

“Injuries?”

“Don’t break anything permanently,” Alexander whispered the same rule Adams had always used. The landlord nodded slowly and stepped forwards.

“You tell no-one about this, you make yourself scarce, you come at my beck and call and I’ll let you have an apartment for half the price. Understood?”

“Yes, master.” Alexander smiled in triumph but the smile was wiped off his face as the man hauled him to his feet and pressed him roughly into the wall. Alexander felt his clothes being ripped off and he closed his eyes to make sure the tears stayed hidden.

In escaping them, he’d proved Reynolds and Adams right, he was just a ten dollar whore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SOMETHING I KEEP ON FORGETTING TO MENTION  
> All of you who want a happy ending? Go read Happy Ending (s) by therealstara


	37. Chapter 37

Alexander slowly hauled himself up the stairs one by one until he reached his apartment. He opened the door and looked around. It was run down and filthy, just what he’d been expecting. There was a tiny kitchen, barely big enough to turn around in. The bathroom had a shower, a sink and a toilet. Alexander realised he was going to need to buy a towel at some point. The bedroom was nothing more than a mattress on the floor but Alexander didn’t care.

He threw his bag onto the floor and then pulled out the plastic bag of dirty clothes. He hurried into the bathroom and placed them in the sink. The smell made him wrinkle his nose but he didn’t care. He needed to make sure he could get the smell out of Aaron’s jumper.

Alexander then stripped down and stepped into the shower. He couldn’t wash the filth off him and the longer he stood under the cold water the longer he knew that. He felt hot tears streak down his face and he sniffled gently. He was a ten dollar whore.

Reynolds and Adams could never touch him again but it was too late, they’d changed him irrevocably.

Alexander didn’t know how long he stayed in the shower but eventually he dragged himself out of the shower and towelled off his hair with a shirt. He then pulled on a pair of jeans but nothing more as he allowed himself to dry to the air.

He sat down with his back again the wall and stared at the single mattress in the middle of the room. He began to make a shopping list up in his mind. He needed a towel, a blanket and some basic food. Then he needed a job. He had somewhere to put down on his job application but he didn’t have a phone number or access to a computer for email. Everything he’d do would have to be via physical mail which would mean he’d need physical paper.

But then he couldn’t write that well with his broken arm. Alexander groaned and leant his head back against the wall.

 

Two weeks later, Alexander was breathing heavily as his hands were tied to the headboard. He was facedown, head pressed into the headboard. He heard heavy footsteps step inside the room and he tried to look back.

Suddenly there was a line of pain down his back and Alexander arched forwards.

“Don’t look at me,” the landlord commanded. “You don’t deserve to look at your betters. If I see you looking anywhere else then you won’t remember the rest of the evening.”

“Yes, master,” Alexander whispered.

“And don’t make me gag you.” With that, the man pulled back his arm and brought down the whip in his hands. Alexander arched up and whimpered. Immediately the whip was brought down again and again. Alexander felt his back rip open after a few hits and tears streaked down his face but he didn’t let himself cry out, not now.

The whip continued to come down again and again until Alexander’s knees collapsed from under him and he slammed his head into the headboard. He whimpered softly as a headache started up but the man behind him didn’t even pause, instead he sped up and Alexander eventually let out a cry of pain.

“Shut up,” the man growled. Alexander groaned and whimpered again. “I told you to shut up!” The man shouted. The whip caught Alexander’s head and shoved him into the headboard again. The world was spinning in front of him.

The man paused and then grabbed for Alexander’s arms. He shoved the teenager onto his back and Alexander screamed at the pain. He was punched across the face in response as the man unzipped himself. Alexander squeezed his eyes tight shut and ignored everything but the agony in his back, knowing that was better than what was about to happen.

When the man was done he threw Alexander’s clothes at him. Alexander lay still for a moment, just breathing heavily. He then grabbed for his clothes and dragged them on. He ignored the blood sticking to his clothing as he knelt in front of the man.

“Th-thank you master,” Alexander rasped out. The man grabbed his hair and yanked it back. Alexander slowly looked up and the man grinned.

“You’re learning.” The man then dropped his hair and Alexander stared ahead blankly. “Now get out of here.”

Alexander ran from the room and all the way up the stairs until he was in his apartment. He ran into the shower and watched as the blood collected at the bottom of the shower. His legs gave out and he collapsed to the floor of the shower as he sobbed roughly.

When he eventually got out of the shower he wrapped a towel tight around his lower half as he limped to his first aid kit. He opened up the kit and stared down. There were a few plasters, bandages and a half empty bottle of anti-septic. The landlord didn’t seem to take that much pleasure in fucking Alexander but he took far too much pleasure hurting him. The small first aid kit had been exhausted quickly and overall, Alexander was running on almost no money to replace it.

Alexander laid face down on his mattress and tried not to whimper. He took some toilet paper and wet it in the anti-septic before he reached behind him and dabbed at the injury. He whimpered and took in a deep breath before he tried again.

The toilet paper was crimson almost immediately and Alexander threw it to the side and grabbed a new bit. He was crying quickly and he had to put his forearm in his mouth, biting down hard to stop him from screaming.

By the time he’d cleaned off all the blood from his back he was light headed. He slowly pulled the bandage around his chest, covering the injuries. He let his head rest against the mattress and pulled the blanket tight around him.

Tears dribbled down his face as he lay there until there was a puddle around his face. He curled in on himself but then paused as it dragged at his injuries. He lay there, letting his eyes slide closed. He was nothing and all he had to prove he was alive was the agony and shame coursing through his body.

 

It took Alexander a full day to realise that something was wrong. The first sign was that he wasn’t hungry, instead a slight nausea was building in his stomach instead. He was just glad that he didn’t need to force any food down his throat so he just lay on his mattress, trying to think.

Alexander fell asleep faster than he could have guessed and by the time he woke up there was definitely something wrong. He was sweating fiercely but he was freezing. He reached for the blanket and paused as nausea ripped into his stomach. He lay still for a moment before he then pulled the blanket over him. It didn’t do much to alleviate the shivers but it did something.

He spent the rest of the day passing in and out of consciousness, never sure of what was going on.

At some point Reynolds strode into the room. Alexander screamed and scrambled backwards but nothing stopped Reynolds closing his hand around Alexander’s neck. Alexander cried out and tried to struggle but Reynolds bashed Alexander’s head against the wall. Alexander felt the wall crater behind him and a headache started up.

Then Reynolds was scrabbling at Alexander’s clothes and Alexander’s arms were suddenly handcuffed behind his back.

“Thought you could run, bitch?” Reynolds hissed. Alexander opened his mouth but found it was full. He choked as he suddenly realised there was a feeding tube down it. He rasped for breath and tried to break free but Reynolds threw him down onto the bed. “It was so good to fuck that pretty little boyfriend of yours.”

Alexander stilled at that as he felt Reynolds chuckled gently behind him. Alexander turned slightly but then Reynolds shoved his head back down.

“He was so tight, so fucking tight he bled. He screamed,” Reynolds hissed. “He screamed for help over and over again but you weren’t there to help. No-one was. You know what was there? Me and Adams. And then a nice sharp knife.”

Alexander began to move side to side violently, trying to get free. Reynolds wrapped his hands around Alexander’s neck and began to squeeze again and Alexander saw black spots dance in front of his eyes.

“I carved him open, belly to mouth and watched as he slowly bled out. I threw his body into the trash where he belonged. I think I’ll make your death longer.” Reynolds pulled out a knife and trailed it across Alexander’s back. Alexander whimpered and Reynolds chuckled.

He plunged it into Alexander’s mid back and Alexander screamed out in agony.

Then something kicked him roughly in the side and he stared up. There was a man above him but he didn’t look like Reynolds anymore. Alexander’s eyesight was fuzzy and he couldn’t see clearly. He tried to sit up but before he could, he collapsed back down with a whimper.

“What’s- you?” The man above him asked.

Alexander closed his eyes, hearing how raspy his breath was. Hands came down on his clothes and his shirt was suddenly ripped off. Alexander raised a hand but it fell back down almost immediately.

“Fuck,” The man hissed out. “Do you- call?” Alexander let his eyes slide closed again until a solid kick came to his ribs. He whimpered and curled up slightly. “Do you have someone to call?”

“’Ria,” Alexander whispered. “Number- fridge.”

The man strode away again and Alexander’s eyes slid closed.

 

Maria arrived after half an hour and hurried up to Alexander’s apartment. His landlord was sat on the floor, glaring at the pathetic looking teenager in front of him. The landlord then stared up and scowled.

“You took your time.”

“What happened to him?” Maria asked, bending down next to Alexander. Alexander whimpered slightly and shied away from her gentle hand.

“I dunno. He’s nothing to do with me. He whores himself out sometimes though. He’s trouble.”

“He’s a teenager on the run,” Maria berated the man. “I’ll take it from here.”

“Tell him I don’t put up with sluts screwing up.”

With that, the landlord strode out of the room, slamming the door as he left. Maria scowled after him before she slowly turned Alexander onto his back. His face was pale and he was shaking heavily. He was mumbling something but Maria had no idea what it was. His shirt was off and bandages covered most of his chest. Maria slowly pulled him up to cradle him against her chest. She could feel so frail the boy was as his sweaty skin pressed against her neck. Maria let out a long breath before she slowly began to undo the bandages bit by bit. Alexander put up no fight, as if he had none left to give.

Maria gasped as the final bandage fell away to reveal the mess that was Alexander’s back.

The first thing she noticed was the smell and she retched at the smell of dead human flesh. Alexander groaned gently and Maria stared in horror at how his skin, already stretched thin over his prominent ribs was covered in long cuts. The injuries themselves were an angry red and the skin around was raised and too hot despite the shivers running through Alexander. Some of the injuries were black and Maria had to look away to stop from throwing up.

She couldn’t imagine the level of pain Alexander was in and she slowly let Alexander down until he was lying on his front. She then tugged his jeans down and let out a long breath as she realised there were more injuries across his thighs, injuries that must have happened when he was naked.

Anger filled her as she realised someone had used this teenager, had hurt him, had nearly killed him and had thrown him aside as if he was nothing.

“You’ll be okay, Alexander.” Maria ran a light hand through Alexander’s hair but paused as he groaned in pain. She leant forwards and stared at a long cut hidden in his hairline, the same injury that covered his back. She slowly parted his hair and stared at the long cut.

“Mama-” Alexander whispered. Maria closed her eyes for a moment and wished that wherever the boy’s mother was, she would be able to hold her son in her arms again. Maria would do her best to let that happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Plz comment. I have many essays to complete today and I have 0 motivation


	38. Chapter 38

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I completed all of my essays! And only cried a bit :D

It took Alexander two more days until he surfaced. Maria spent almost every moment of that time by his bedside. She kept his injuries clean as best she could but she knew that was failing. The whip marks covered his back and continued downwards.

Alexander fought back when she tried to strip him down completely and she’d had to hold him down to treat his lower injuries. She was beyond glad her husband didn’t pay much attention to her anymore, that she could spend this time with the teenager.

One of the first things she found out was that his place was woefully unequipped to deal with anything like this. So she bought a small collection of clothes, a bucket and the ingredients to make a soup. Alexander threw up the soup the moment it passed into him and Maria lost her appetite for what felt like the hundredth time that day.

Cleaning Alexander’s back took half an hour. The pus continued to ooze down his back and the sticky, dried up pus was tough to remove when Alexander whimpered at every touch to his back. She first cleaned it off with warm water and then waited patiently as pus and blood dribbled down his back. She then used another cloth to dry him off before using another one to gently dab antiseptic into Alexander’s injuries.

Alexander was too far gone at that point to make a noise but his neck was boneless and his skin was clammy. His eyes were closed and he’d stopped muttering, just lying there so pale and Maria knew he was far too close to death for comfort.

She washed the cloths the best she could in the kitchen sink and laid them out to dry. An hour later, there was fresh pus and blood covering Alexander’s back and Maria had to repeat the action, trying not to gag at every moment.

When night fell Maria lay down next to Alexander and the teenager curled into her warmth. Maria ran a soft hand through his hair and prayed to a God she barely believed in that the boy would be alive when she woke up.

It turned out something must have been listening to her because Maria was woken by Alexander’s screams. His eyes were half lidded and he still couldn’t raise his head. Maria tried to calm him down but it wasn’t long before the landlord was banging on the door, demanding to know what was going on.

“Come on, Alexander, it’s okay, you’re safe.”

“Aaron-” Alexander rasped out. Maria paused before she gathered Alexander up in her arms and held him tightly. She tried to avoid his back but could feel blood dribble onto her hands.

“You’re okay,” Maria whispered. Alexander relaxed against Maria’s body and Maria rocked him gently until his screams died away. She then gently placed Alexander back down face first on the mattress, his head leaning off the top.

Maria was amazed that Alexander had even been conscious enough to ask for her as over the next two days he didn’t say a single sentence she could understand.

On the third day he slowly flicked open his eyes and they focused on Maria. He frowned weakly and opened his mouth before he closed it again.

“Hey, Alexander,” Maria whispered.

“’Ria,” Alexander mumbled. “Why-”

“Your injuries got infected. I had to look after you for a bit.” Alexander frowned at that and his eyes slowly slid closed. “Hey, no, you gotta drink some water before you can sleep.”

“-Ter?” Alexander mumbled out. Maria grabbed a glass and pressed it to Alexander’s lips. Alexander drank slowly and then hungrily. When he reached the end of the glass he stared at it in disappointment.

“You try to sleep now,” Maria whispered. Alexander sank down onto his mattress again. “I’m gonna cook you up something and we’ll see if you can stomach it when you wake up.”

Alexander’s eyes slid closed and he was asleep in seconds. Maria slowly ran her hand through Alexander’s hair, staring at the teenager.

 It was another three days until Alexander had the strength to sit up. Maria was there in a moment with a glass to press against his lips. Alexander groaned gently as he slowly drank it.

“Why’re- why’re you here?” Alexander asked softly. Maria smiled weakly.

“You needed someone to look after you, you still do.”

“No, I’m-” Alexander broke off and let out a long breath. “I’m fine.”

“Don’t be an idiot. Lie back down.”

“N-no.” Alexander fought back as Maria tried to gently press him back down to the mattress.

“Alexander, you have lost a week.”

“A week?” Alexander whispered. “N-no!”

“If I’d known any less about you I would have dragged you to a hospital. Alexander, you-” Maria shook her head before she continued. “You could have developed sepsis. A few more days, maybe just hours, you’d be dead.”

“Maria-”

“You need to go back to your mama, Alexander! You need to go back to her and explain what’s going on so she can protect you.”

Alexander tensed at that and stared at Maria. Maria frowned as she saw the walls in Alexander’s eyes slam shut.

“My mama is dead,” Alexander spat out. “She’s dead because I couldn’t do enough. I couldn’t whore myself out to enough people to fucking keep her alive! And then afterwards I couldn’t lie for them well enough to protect my friends! And if I go back? If I go back to the house where I fucking grew up? Then they’ll whore me out again and again until I’m nothing but a fucking sex toy. I can’t fucking go back. I can’t ever be safe there.”

Alexander glared at Maria whose eyes widened at the implications. Alexander looked away and lay back down, pulling the bloodstained blanket over him.

“I can’t go back because the men who used me could have killed my friends and I’d never know,” Alexander whispered. “They- they could rape them, hurt them because I wasn’t there. Because I couldn’t take the beatings and the rapes for them. And I can’t go back, Maria because- because I’m terrified of what I’ll find.”

“I didn’t know,” Maria whispered. Alexander looked away, tears in his eyes.

“This is better, dying of an infection alone in an apartment is better than dying with them fucking me and hurting me because at least this way I’m me. I- I’m me.” Alexander sounded like he was trying desperately to convince himself.

Maria pulled Alexander into a gentle hug and let out a long sigh.

“I’m sorry.”

“Not your fault,” Alexander whispered. “’S my fault. Always been my fault.”

 

Maria left after several more hours with strict instructions for Alexander to keep hydrated and attempt to eat something. Alexander drifted in and out of sleep for several hours until a knock at the door came.

Alexander groaned before he slowly hauled himself to his feet. Each step was difficult and painful but he eventually managed to pull the door open. He stared up at the landlord and felt his breath speed up.

“Master?” Alexander whispered, he’d found out early on that it meant that the man was less likely to hurt him. “Do you need something?”

“You’ve been nothing but fucking trouble this week.” The man strode into the room and Alexander slowly closed the door behind him. “Screaming, bringing that woman here, bringing attention to yourself. I’m five seconds from kicking you out.”

“Master, please.” Alexander’s voice was raspy and he slowly sank to his knees. His thighs protested the movement as the whip lashes came in contact with his lower legs.

“Please? What are you even begging for, whore?”

Alexander flinched at the insult and felt tears rise in his eyes. The man strode forwards and Alexander snapped his head up. The landlord snarled and slapped him. Alexander lost his balance and toppled to the ground, a ringing starting in his head. He groaned softly before he was being dragged upwards by his hair again.

“You don’t look at your betters,” The man snarled. “You are a whore! A worthless piece of scum willing to sell your own body for spare change!” The man hit him again and the only reason Alexander didn’t fall over was the tight grip in his hair.

“I’m sorry,” Alexander whispered, tears in his eyes.

“Open your mouth, slut,” the man spat down. Alexander opened his mouth in defeat as the man unzipped his jeans.

When the landlord was done he punched Alexander across the face. Alexander fell to the floor and the man followed it up with a kick to his stomach. Alexander groaned and curled in on himself which made the landlord crouch down and raise a hand over his head. He brought it down with all of his might over Alexander’s back.

Alexander screamed at the agony before his vision turned black and he passed out.

 

When Alexander woke up, his apartment was dark. He moved forwards and then fell still. Pain was coursing through his body and nothing he did could alleviate it. He felt tears dribbling down his face but didn’t make a move to wipe them away. He lay in the darkness knowing he could die and no-one would care.

He was a whore, a worthless whore who couldn’t even save his friends. He was only good for being fucked and even then he was just performing the role anyone could, a role someone’s hand could perform.

Alexander closed his eyes and for yet another night he wasn’t sure if he wanted to open them again.


	39. Chapter 39

The first time Aaron saw her he didn’t recognise her. He was walking the short distance from Washington’s car to the school when he spotted a woman standing just outside the school. She looked uncomfortable, every inch of her tense.

Aaron slowed and stared at her for a long moment. She stared around the school for several long moments.

“Are you okay?” Lafayette asked softly. Aaron glanced at him and nodded. When he looked back, the woman was gone. He frowned but continued into the school.

It had been three weeks since Alexander had run away and the police search was beginning to die down again. They had no leads, they said. He had probably run off to be with his boyfriend, they said.

They said nothing about the terror Aaron could remember seeing in his friend’s face.

No-one seemed to want to talk about that.

 

Thomas tapped the top of his pencil slowly against his desk as he stared at the teacher, not taking anything in. It had been so long since Alexander had vanished and there was no new information. He hadn’t taken enough to keep himself alive on his own and Thomas was terrified of what that meant.

The school was buzzing with rumours and while Thomas tried his hardest not to listen to them he couldn’t help it. Some people said Alexander had died, some said he’d run away to be with his actual boyfriend, Thomas tried not to take too much offense at that. Thomas knew that the Alexander he knew wouldn’t have just abandoned him.

He also didn’t know if he knew Alexander. The Alexander that had fled that room had been terrified and could have done anything.

Someone slid into the seat next to Thomas and Thomas glanced sideways. At the sight of King he tensed.

“The fuck do you want?” Thomas spat out. King pouted at that.

“That’s not very nice, Tommy.”

“I don’t want anything to do with you, George.”

“But Tommy…” King whined out. Thomas glared ahead.

“Didn’t Angelica teach you a lesson when she punched you out?”

“That bitch-”

“Don’t talk about her like that,” Thomas growled.

“You’ve changed, Tommy.”

“For the better if I thought hanging out with you was a good idea.”

“You know, if we wanted we could go off to the bathroom,” King slowly put his hand down onto Thomas’ leg. “Have some fun.”

Thomas grabbed King’s wrist and pressed down until he heard the other boy whimper. He didn’t stop staring ahead at the teacher.

“If you think I’m desperate enough to settle for something as revolting as you then you’re out of your fucking mind,” Thomas growled. “Stay the fuck away from me, George.” Thomas finally dropped King’s wrist and was gratified when King began softly massaging his wrist. “And stay away from my friends.”

“Fine,” King spat out. “I’ll just wait for the slut to come crawling back. I heard he’s off being trained to take cock even better. I wonder if he’ll cry this time when I force him down and fuck his arrogant little mouth. Maybe-”

Thomas wasn’t aware of the first punch or the second punch. He was only aware when he was being pulled back. King was lying on the floor, hands raised over his face as blood poured from his nose. Thomas snapped his mouth shut, realising he’d been screaming.

The classroom was deathly silent for a moment before the teacher strode forwards.

“Thomas Jefferson, go to the principal’s office this second!” The teacher shouted. “George, go to the nurse’s office, make sure you’re not hurt too bad.”

Thomas stared as King left the room, a smirk hidden under his bloody face. He stared down at his hands and gasped as he saw blood caked around his knuckles. James wasn’t in the room and once more he’d lost his temper over something useless.

 

When Angelica, Eliza and Peggy got back from school there was a woman waiting for them. Angelica froze at the sight of her and Eliza tensed, since Alexander’s disappearance her hypervigilance had kicked into overtime.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Angelica snarled out. The woman sighed as she stood. Her dark brown hair was cut short around her head. She was thin and there was a hardness around her face that reminded Peggy far too much of someone else.

“Angelica-”

“No. Fuck off back to where you came from!” Angelica strode forwards and the woman flinched back. Angelica paused and shook her head.

“Angie,” Eliza asked quietly. “Who is she?”

“I’m-” the woman sighed. “My name is Sally Reeve. You- you probably know me as Sarah Burr.”

“Aaron’s sister?” Peggy asked, staring at the woman as if she was insane. She nodded slowly. “You left him.”

“I-” Sarah sighed. “I had to. You don’t- you don’t get what that place was like.”

“You left your brother to be raped.” Eliza scowled as she spoke. Sarah looked away.

“I didn’t know.”

“Why are you back?”

“I need to talk to him.”

“Go talk to him then.” Angelica scoffed. “If he wants to talk to you.”

“I don’t know where he is.” Sarah admitted quietly. “I’m still a missing persons. I can’t go to CPS or- or the police.”

“You’re nineteen.”

“And I have a child. I- if they realise-”

“Where is your child?”

“I left him at home. With my boyfriend. He- he knows I was raped. He doesn’t know it was my uncle. But he- he didn’t. I told him and told him I had to confront what happened to me. So I- I’m back.”

“You’re back to talk to Aaron.”

“Yes.”

“Don’t you dare fuck this up.” Angelica growled out. Sarah nodded eagerly and Angelica glanced back at her two sisters. “Either of you coming?”

“I will.” Eliza said softly. Peggy nodded as well and Angelica let out a long breath. She pulled her phone out of her pocket.

**To: Fighting Frenchman**

**Sarah Burr is here and I’m bringing her to you. Warn Aaron**

She then chucked the phone to Peggy who caught it easily enough and turned on her heel to the car they’d just exited. Eliza and Peggy sat in the back while Angelica drove and Sarah awkwardly stared out of the window.

The entire car journey was awkward as the silence was almost deafening.

When they eventually stopped in front of the house Angelica stopped the car but didn’t get out.

“Three weeks ago, Aaron’s best friend ran away.” Angelica stated. “He screamed at Aaron that everyone left him, no-one loved him and he was so fucking desperate for someone to give a damn about him that he allowed your uncle to rape him.”

“Why did he say that?”

“It’s complicated. But I swear to God, if you make him believe that same thing then I will murder you.”

“Okay.”

 

Thomas stared down at his knuckles numbly. He could hear the head teacher on the phone through the door. Probably talking to his parents, or maybe the psychiatrist. Thomas shuddered at that thought. James sat down next to him and sighed.

“What set it off?”

“James-”

“No, Thomas, this is serious. You don’t have time to mess around with this anger bullshit. You need to get over it. If that means going back on those meds-”

“No. I can’t- I can’t cope-”

“You’re gonna throw away every opportunity if you get in too many fights. If this thing with Alexander-”

“This thing? James, he’s-”

“Thomas, breathe.”

Thomas squeezed his eyes tight shut and bent over himself. James put a gentle hand on his back. Thomas slowly took in deep breaths as he tried to stop the anger running through his system.

“It’s been months since you got in a physical fight and then it was retaliation. Your permanent record is nearly clean, just a bit of trouble in your childhood. That’s it. Colleges-”

“What if they have Alexander?” Thomas whispered. “There’s no oversight, James. They could break every bone in his body. They could rape him every moment of the day. They could- they could beat him and burn him and kill him and I wouldn’t know. And then King makes fucking jokes about raping Alexander’s mouth. I-”

James sighed and nodded slowly.

“He’ll be alright.”

“You don’t know that!”

“No, no I don’t,” James admitted softly. Thomas opened his mouth to say something but he had nothing. The two sat in deafening silence.

 

Sarah squared her shoulders and took in a deep breath. If Angelica didn’t know better she would say that the girl almost looked scared.

Then the door opened and Aaron stood in the doorway. He stared at Sarah for several long moments before he glanced at the sisters.

“Az?” Sarah asked, suddenly looking sick.

“Yeah.”

“Fuck.” Sarah stepped forwards until she was within touching distance. She reached her hand out to the scar on the side of Aaron’s neck but paused, not touching. “What did he do to you?”

“He took coins.” Aaron’s voice was monotonous. “He put them in the oven until they were glowing and then he pressed them into my skin. I have eight scars.”

“Az, I’m-” Sarah shook her head. “I didn’t think-”

“Angelica already told you what else he did to me.” Aaron was obviously fighting to keep his voice level and was barely managing it. “I didn’t get pregnant. I- I didn’t get to run away from my problems with that excuse. I waited until he decided to kill me.”

“I thought he- I didn’t- I hoped-”

“Why did you leave me?” Aaron sounded so young at that, at the memory of his big sister leaving him. “You promised we’d run away together. Since we were kids, it was- it was always together. I learned how to hack for- for you. So we could start over!”

“We were children.”

“And you managed to spend the last year of your childhood safe. He-” Aaron closed his eyes and shook his head. “Why are you even back?”

“Because I didn’t want to leave you.”

“You already did.”

“Az-”

“Stop calling me that.” Aaron snapped out. “I’m not your baby brother anymore, Sarah. You left me with a man you knew was a rapist and didn’t give a fuck about the age of consent-”

“He did. He did with me. I- I know that’s not any better but-”

“Fifteen.” Aaron stated. Sarah closed her eyes with a sigh. “He raped me at fifteen.” He said that part quietly, as if he was still ashamed. “You left me to that. To him. I was his plaything and-” Aaron’s eyes filled with tears and he looked away.

“Az-”

“He wanted you. He- he made me look like you, act like you and when I acted like me he’d beat me. All those punishments we took together, he gave to me alone. And-”

“Aaron-”

“No!” Aaron shook his head. “I’m done, Sarah. I’m done being hurt because of you.” With that, he turned to walk back into the house.

“I’m not going to leave!” Sarah shouted. “I- I’m here for a week, Az and I’m not leaving early. No matter what.”

“Good for you.” With that, Aaron re-entered the house without even glancing back.


	40. Chapter 40

Alexander flicked through the last few dollars in his wallet. His stomach growled angrily and he sighed. He had no idea what he was meant to do now. None of the jobs he’d applied for had accepted him and he was becoming desperate.

The landlord had stated that the moment Alexander fell behind on monetary payment then he’d be out, especially as Alexander couldn’t perform well enough with his hurt back. Alexander had bitten his tongue at that and hadn’t asked whose fault it was.

That night had been hard enough without his tongue getting him into trouble.

Alexander stared down at the wallet again and let out a long sigh. He pulled out one of the notes and turned it over and over in his hands. An old white man stared back at him almost judgingly as he stared down at the ten dollar note.

He bit down on his lower lip and glanced out the window at the sun quickly setting before he stared back at the note. Was it worth it? Was being free worth starving to death? He wanted to live in this world, not die because no-one wanted to give him a damn job.

Alexander closed his eyes before he slowly stood and walked over to his wardrobe. He had almost no clothes that could look at all enticing but he needed something. He eventually pulled on a loose t-shirt that hung off his shoulder and revealed a long portion of his neck. He then tugged on the only pair of jeans that properly fit him, hoping it would accentuate whatever those men found fuckable in him.

He didn’t look in the mirror before he left, he didn’t need to see the whore he was.

Alexander made his way into a club with far too much ease. He could feel the gazes of the bouncers as he slipped in and then made his way to lean against the bar. He didn’t try to buy anything, didn’t want to push his luck. All he needed was a few people to fuck him and then he could be gone.

“What’s someone like you doing here?” Someone muttered next to Alexander. Alexander glanced over to see a man stood next to him. He was nearly a foot taller than Alexander and looked so much stronger.

“What’s that meant to mean?”

“You look like you’re fifteen,” The man scoffed. He looked up and down Alexander before he narrowed his eyes. “How old even are you?”

“Eighteen.”

“Really?” The man placed a hand on Alexander’s hip and Alexander smelt the alcohol on the man’s breath. The man bent forwards to kiss Alexander and Alexander closed his eyes as he let it happen.

“I cost,” Alexander breathed out. The man pulled back and his face twisted in disgust.

“What?”

“Ten dollars and you can do whatever you want.”

The man raised an eyebrow and grinned. He reached into his wallet and pulled out a ten dollar note. Alexander forced a smile onto his face as the man began to drag him out of the club. Alexander wasn’t sure where they were going until the man pulled him into an alley and forced him against the wall.

Alexander whimpered as his half healed back scraped against the rough wall but the man didn’t seem to care as he stripped Alexander down. He didn’t seem to care about a lot of things.

 

Alexander hobbled back into his apartment as the sun rose. He felt disgusting and his back hurt so bad. It took him far too long to get up the stairs and when he got to his apartment he paused.

“You’re not meant to be here,” Alexander croaked out. Maria stared at him and sighed.

“Wondered why you weren’t in.” Maria stood slowly, struggling around the baby bump that was growing by the day. Her make-up was smeared and it looked like she’d been crying for a long time.

“Come in.” Alexander hobbled forwards and pushed the door open. He pulled the thirty dollars he’d made out of his back pocket and placed it on the side. He then pulled down two mugs and flicked the kettle on. He chucked a teabag in one and some instant coffee in the other. He brought out the last of his milk and poured it into Maria’s mug.

Alexander then hobbled out of the kitchen and into the living room. Maria was sat on the floor and accepted the tea. Alexander slowly lowered himself down to face her, trying not to shift any of his new injuries.

“Where’d you go?” Maria asked softly.

“Doesn’t matter,” Alexander whispered. “Why’re you here?”

“My husband decided- he decided he didn’t want my baby anymore. Wanted to have sex with me again but doesn’t like what I look like. He threatened to kill my baby. Couldn’t stay there.”

“So what’re you doing now?” Alexander didn’t look up, already knowing the answer. Maria would go back, she always would. She was trapped, no job to escape to, no family left and Alexander was the only friend she had.

“Can I stay here a bit?” Maria whispered.

“Course.” Alexander reached forwards and held one of Maria’s hands. “You can stay here as long as you can.”

“Where were you out?”

“Does it matter?” Alexander whispered.

“Yeah.”

Alexander sighed and shook his head. He looked off into the distance as he bit down on his lip.

“I was sleeping with people for money,” Alexander whispered. “I was whoring myself out so I can eat today.”

“Oh, Alexander.”

“I’m gonna take a shower.” Alexander stood abruptly. “If you- the fridge is empty and- I got thirty dollars last night. I’m gonna try to get forty tonight. Try to keep half back for rent.”

“Alexander-”

“I’m gonna take a shower,” Alexander muttered. He then hobbled out of the room, feeling Maria’s gaze on him. When he reached the shower he stripped down and slowly undid the bandages around his upper body. He turned to stare at the injuries in the mirror. Most of them were scabbed over and only a couple were still bleeding.

There were light bruises across his body but he ignored them as he limped into the shower. He turned the shower on as hot as it went which was barely above tepid. He let his eyes slide closed as he felt the effort of the night wash over him.

When he left the shower he collapsed onto his mattress, face first and dragged the blanket around him. He didn’t let himself think for more than a few seconds as to what he’d done.

 

When Alexander woke up it was the middle of the afternoon. He could hear Maria whistling in the other room and he smiled weakly. For a moment it felt like the days before Adams, when it was just his mother and him, safe in this new world they knew they’d survive in.

Then Alexander shifted and agony shot through him. He whimpered and Maria fell silent.

“Alexander?”

“I’m fine,” Alexander croaked out. He struggled to his feet and slowly hobbled into the kitchen to see Maria standing over his battered pot. Something smelt amazing and Alexander limped towards the pot. “What you making?”

“Just some stew. Are you okay?”

“’m fine.” Alexander pulled himself up to sit on the counter and just barely hid his whimper. Maria scowled at him and Alexander looked away. “I’m okay, Maria, I swear.”

“You’re limping and look like you’re in agony. Don’t lie to me.”

“I got money, okay? The only way anyone apparently wants me to.” Alexander glared down at the floor and sighed.

“I went shopping while you were asleep. Here.” Maria reached into a shopping bag next to her and pulled out a packet of condoms and a bottle of lube. Alexander stared at them before he looked away.

“I don’t need them.”

“Mijo-”

“What do you think people would do if the common street whore asked someone to wear a condom? I’m- I’m filthy. I’m probably infected. I get that.” Alexander glared at the two items. “I can’t change that.”

“My husband makes me do it something,” Maria whispered. Alexander glanced up at her in surprise. “He- he started asking if I wanted threesomes. I said no. Then we- we experimented and he tied me up and- and blindfolded me and- and-” Maria let out a long breath. “He finally took the blindfold off and it wasn’t him.”

“That’s fucked up,” Alexander spat out. Maria nodded slowly.

“Eventually I figured it was easier to just accept it.”

“You need to get outta there permanently, Maria.”

“He loves me.”

“He rapes you. He hits you,” Alexander spat out. “He’s scum.” Maria stared at the floor and let out a long sigh.

“I don’t see why you gotta do this to yourself, Alexander. You could go-”

“If I go back my boyfriend is raped,” Alexander whispered. “My traumatised brother is beaten and raped. My friends- I can’t protect them, Maria. I tried. I tried for- for so long. I don’t know how to protect them. So I’m not gonna try. I’m just gonna- I can’t go back.”

“The police?”

“They won’t believe me. I lied to the courts. All my evidence is worthless, the rape kits, the DNA, my statements. I’ve ruined my life, Maria and I can’t go back. I can’t face my friends again. They know I’m a whore and- and they always have and I can’t cope with it anymore.”

“And this is the life you want? Going out there and letting people hurt you every night?”

“It’s- it’s what’s realistic. I can’t get better, Maria. So I’ll wait until I’m eighteen and then I’ll get out of here.”

“And that’s all you want?”

“It’s all I can have,” Alexander whispered. “All a ten dollar whore like me can get.”

“Why’d you call yourself that?”

“Cause my step father sold me for ten dollars so I could keep my mama alive. He- he’d take me into his room and fuck me and throw a ten dollar note on me like I was- like I was nothing,” Alexander rubbed angrily at his eyes and Maria sighed.

“That does not make you any less.”

“A ten dollar whore,” Alexander spat out. “Who- who couldn’t even fucking deal with his boyfriend touching him. None of it- I’m nothing, Maria. Because of what he did to me.”

Maria stared at Alexander for a moment before she pulled him into a tight hug. Alexander gasped in surprise but then linked his arms around her back as well. She held him close as he began to quietly sob into her shoulder.

 

That evening both of them sat on the floor with the setting sun spread across their faces. They told each other stories from their lives, happy stories that made each other laugh until their sides hurt.

When night finally fell, Alexander stood. Maria scowled but Alexander just shook his head.

“I don’t wanna argue with you, Maria. Please, just let me do this. We need money.”

“I can get a job.”

“Who’d hire you when you’re that pregnant?”

“Alexander-”

“No, you’re pregnant, okay? And I’m not. Whatever they do to me I can recover from. You and your baby can’t. I’m gonna keep trying to get a job but we need this now. We have to have money or- I can’t look after you and your baby if you don’t let me do this.”

“You’re not even an adult, you don’t have to look after me.”

“I wasn’t last time either. I’m not screwing up again.”

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t wait up for me.” Alexander walked into his bedroom and Maria slowly stood. She walked over to the counter and stared down at the condoms she’d bought. She picked up a packet and turned it over. If there wasn’t a baby inside her she might be able to help Alexander, would be able to go out with him.

Alexander walked out of the bedroom and Maria stared at the goose bumps on his arms. It was snowing outside and he’d be given no opportunity to warm up. Maria sighed and stepped forwards.

“Please, Alexander. There are infections you can’t heal from.”

“And what’s the chances I’ve already got them?”

“Then you don’t wanna pass them onto customers. If one of them gets tested and remembers you how long do you reckon it’d take for them to hurt you or rat you out to the police?”

Alexander glared at her for a moment before he opened the box of condoms and shoved six of them into his back pocket.

“Thank you,” Maria whispered. Alexander’s gaze softened at that and he nodded slowly.

“It’ll be okay, Maria. It’ll all be okay, I swear.”


	41. Chapter 41

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for being away so long, life sucks rn.  
> Also big warning for everything that Aaron's gone through before now (abuse, rape, forced incest, underage etc.) Unfortunately Aaron centric chapters will include these until well into the sequel as he comes to terms with these things and gets better

“When I said I wasn’t talking to you,” Aaron snapped out, “I meant I wasn’t talking.” Sarah sighed and rolled her eyes.

“Come on, Az-”

“Aaron.”

“Let me explain myself at least!”

“You decided to leave me. You valued your unborn child above your younger brother.” Aaron turned and scowled at Sarah who stared evenly back. “What else is there to explain?”

“I didn’t want to. I never wanted to hurt you.”

“You could have called social services.”

“So could you!”

“He told me I was unlovable and the only way I, as a fifteen year old, could be put up with is when he fucked me.”

Sarah paused at that and Aaron turned away. He was sat on the bleachers outside school. Sitting with the group without Alexander was depressing. They’d talk and laugh as if it was normal, as if their best friend wasn’t being raped and hurt.

To be fair, Aaron didn’t know that was happening but he was sure. The nightmares that haunted him every night wouldn’t go away and in every one he saw Alexander hurt worse and worse than Aaron could ever have given his imagination credit for.

“Timothy was messed up,” Sarah whispered.

“Why do you call him that?” Aaron snapped out. It was easier to think of the man as his uncle, someone who’d hurt him but who had loved him in all the wrong ways.  Calling him by his first name made him sound so much more dangerous, made the threat sound so much more believable.

“Because it was easier explaining to people someone called Timothy raped me rather than my uncle.”

“Well, good for you.” Aaron stared down at his hands, refusing to look at his sister. “You’re not even meant to be on school property.”

“I’m leaving tomorrow.”

“I know.”

“Az- Az, I wanna stay. I wanna stay and talk to you. I want to sort this out. I want you to meet my baby and-”

“You want me to meet my cousin.” Aaron slowly turned to Sarah who nodded slowly. “You left me to a rapist, Sarah. And- and you never seemed to care. You promised that I could come with you and then you abandoned me. I would have sacrificed everything for you and you-” Aaron stood. “You should go, Sarah. Or- or Sally or whatever you’re called. Maybe when I’ve gotten over being abandoned and beaten and raped then I’ll be able to look at you. For now, go back to your loving boyfriend, your beautiful little child and your happy life you chose to have without me. Because I’m not having it with you.”

Aaron let out a breath before he turned on his heels and walked back into the school, leaving Sarah alone on the bleachers.

 

When Aaron got back to his house there was an envelope outside the door. Lafayette grabbed it and frowned down at it.

“It is for you,” Lafayette passed the envelope to Aaron. Aaron frowned and slowly opened it. Inside the envelope was a long letter and a photograph. Aaron glanced at the photograph and then paused. It was Sarah smiling next to a man her own age and a toddler. They looked so happy that Aaron dropped the letter onto the floor.

Aaron stepped into the house. Lafayette glanced back at the letter.

“I hate her,” Aaron whispered. He threw his hands down and clenched his hands into fists. “I hate her.”

“Aaron-”

“She’s barely apologised! She just- just expects me to come crawling back to her and-” Aaron sighed and shook his head. “I’m not her brother anymore and she’s made that fucking obvious.”

Lafayette stared at Aaron for several long moments before he looked away. He bent down and picked up the photo from where Aaron had dropped it.

“I would give so much to have my family back,” Lafayette whispered. “I- I would do almost anything to have my parents with me again. But no matter what I do, they cannot be back.” Aaron glanced at Lafayette, something open and weak in his eyes. Lafayette pressed on. “I shall never be an uncle, Aaron. My parents shall not see their grandchildren or the person I marry. I shall be alone at my wedding. Family is so important and- and I cannot have mine.”

“She left me,” Aaron mumbled. Lafayette nodded.

“My family loved me. My- my story is not yours, Aaron. But please, do not throw this away.”

“Keep it,” Aaron said softly. “I can’t look at it, not yet.”

“You do not need to look at it now.” Lafayette stepped forwards and Aaron felt his heart jump uncomfortably in his chest. He expected the wave of panic but nothing came. Instead, a warm feeling washed over him.

Aaron slowly leant forwards and wrapped his arms around Lafayette. Lafayette stiffened in surprise but then hugged him back.

“My uncle raped me,” Aaron whispered. Lafayette nodded gently. “He raped me because he wanted my sister instead and- and she’d left me to him. She left me to be raped! And- and beaten and-” Aaron broke off as Lafayette gently squeezed him.

“It is going to be okay,” Lafayette whispered as Aaron finally broke down sobbing in his arms.

 

The Washington household was quiet that night. Some time past midnight Aaron woke, drenched in sweat. He stood and stumbled forwards until he reached the corridor. He paused for a moment, torn between Alexander’s room and Lafayette’s.

Alexander’s room would be silent and lonely. His smell was going because of the amount of time Aaron had spent in the room. Lafayette’s room had Lafayette in it but it had the danger of a person.

Aaron slowly knocked on Lafayette’s door and then pushed the door open. Lafayette looked up and blinked in confusion.

Aaron froze for several long moments as he stared at Lafayette. He didn’t know where they stood, not really. He didn’t know if they were friends or enemies. One thing he did know though was that Lafayette would be willing to punish him.

“Aaron?” Lafayette asked, voice heavy with his accent. Aaron nodded and walked further into the room. His uncle had always been the one to punish him, until Aaron fucked that up and had to take over his own punishments.

If he didn’t fuck up so much he wouldn’t need to be punished, he knew that better than anyone. Aaron also knew that his uncle had promised him time after time that if he was good, if he accepted his punishments willingly and was grateful to the one who gave them out then nothing would go wrong.

Alexander would be safe.

Aaron slowly sat down on the edge of the bed and took in a deep breath. His uncle had terrified him whenever he’d tried this punishment but Aaron was older now, more experienced.

He refused to let himself be too tight this time.

“Are you okay?” Lafayette asked, yawning as he did so. Aaron smiled and nodded gently. He could be good, he could be alluring. He could maybe not fuck this up all over again.

“I wanted to be with you,” Aaron whispered. Lafayette smiled softly at that.

“There is always room in my bed when you cannot sleep.”

Aaron’s breath stuttered for a moment. Lafayette had been expecting this. How long had Aaron been holding out? How long had Alexander been suffering needlessly because Aaron couldn’t just get over his fear of being punished?

Lafayette shifted over and pulled his duvet up. Aaron could see his naked chest and the fact that only boxers covered him. Aaron took in a deep breath as he sank down into the bed. Lafayette stared at him fondly in the darkness and Aaron smiled weakly.

His uncle had always liked him being demure, being malleable. Lafayette might want something else though. Aaron slowly slid a hand up to rest on Lafayette’s chest. He could feel the teenager’s heartbeat and he smiled softly.

“What keeps you awake?” Lafayette asked. Aaron sighed.

“Thinking.”

“It is difficult. Not knowing what to do to save petit.” Lafayette shook his head in the darkness and Aaron stared at him. He knew that Lafayette was attractive and he’d be lying if he said that he hadn’t imagine kissing the teenager before. So Aaron had no idea why it felt so dirty to be lying there in bed with him ready to fuck him

“I think I know,” Aaron whispered. Lafayette frowned as Aaron slowly inched forwards. He paused as their faces were inches apart before he gently pressed his lips to Lafayette’s. Lafayette let out a noise of surprise but responded quickly. He began to kiss Aaron back and Aaron let his mouth fall open at the tongue that delved in.

Lafayette curled his hand around the back of Aaron’s head to drag him closer and Aaron felt ice shoot down his spine.

 

_“I don’t wanna do this, uncle,” Aaron said, crossing his arms. His uncle stared at him with cold hatred._

_“Get on my lap right this second, boy or I’ll lay you over it.”_

_Aaron continued to scowl but he slowly crawled into the man’s lap. He felt too small compared to the man, too small and too fragile. His uncle pressed his lips against Aaron’s and Aaron whimpered and pulled back._

_“I don’t like this.”_

_“You kissed your parents, didn’t you? Don’t you love me?”_

_“I-” Aaron frowned. He didn’t kiss his parents like that. “We never kissed like that.”_

_“Because you were too young. This is how adults kiss.”_

_“I’m fourteen.”_

_“You’re old enough for me,” the man whispered as he leant forwards again. Aaron frowned as he began to kiss the man. He felt something warm and slimy enter his mouth and he tried to pull back. Before he could, his uncle grabbed his hair and pulled him close._

“Mon amour-” Lafayette whispered softly. “I didn’t know you cared like I did.”

“Of course I do.” Aaron reacted robotically as he slowly let his hand wander down and shuffle down Lafayette’s boxers. Lafayette smiled and pulled down his underwear. Aaron stared at his face, not allowing his gaze to wander for a moment.

He couldn’t afford to lose his confidence now.

 

_Aaron tried to pull away as his uncle pushed down his pants. A hand delved into his underwear and Aaron whined into the mouth still pressed against him._

_He felt the man’s calloused hands scrape against his gentle flesh and he shuddered. He tried to fight but then his uncle bit down hard on his lower lip, causing blood to bubble up._

_“Do not try to fight me.”_

Aaron could feel his consciousness fading as Lafayette began to strip him. He could just about feel soft hands running over his body, almost worshipping him, but he couldn’t bring himself to connect to his body as it happened.

 

_“I don’t want this!” Aaron screamed. His uncle backhanded him which caused him to slide off the man’s lap. Aaron immediately began to crawl away but was brought to a halt as his uncle’s boot came down squarely in the middle of his back._

“You are so beautiful,” Lafayette whispered softly as he kissed across Aaron’s skin. “I am so lucky.” Lafayette gently kissed the exposed skin at Aaron’s hip. Aaron let out a weak noise but nothing else. Lafayette frowned and pulled back. “Aaron?”

 

_“You ungrateful brat!” The man screamed, kicking Aaron in the side. Aaron whimpered and tried to move away but before he could, his uncle grabbed his hair and yanked him up. Aaron could feel strands snapping and he yelped in agony._

“Aaron?” Lafayette asked in fear as Aaron did not respond. His eyes had glazed over and there were tears leaking from the sides.

 

_Aaron knelt in front of his uncle, feeling the black eye quickly swelling. He knew the teachers wouldn’t believe that he walked into another door which meant he wouldn’t be able to go to school the next day, he wouldn’t be able to see Alexander._

_His uncle was sat over him, smoking a cigar. He kept on flicking the ashes down and chuckling when Aaron flinched back at them._

_“You killed your parents, you know. If you’d been just a bit more open, just a bit more useful, they wouldn’t have died. It’s your fault.”_

Lafayette slowly went to wipe a tear from Aaron’s eyes and the teenager flinched back. Lafayette froze in place.

“Please-” Aaron whimpered pathetically.

_“Sir-”_

_“Arm out,” the man commanded. Aaron slowly extended his arm and his uncle grinned. “When you see this scar remember that you killed your parents. You chased off your sister. No-one loves you, Aaron. And why would they love something as pathetic as you?” With that, he began to grind the cigar into Aaron’s arm, burning through layer after layer of skin._

_Aaron couldn’t hold back his screams._

“Mon Dieu,” Lafayette mumbled as he pulled his underwear up. He stared down at Aaron before he covered Aaron with the duvet and then stumbled back. He could feel his hands shaking as he tried to think.

Aaron had wanted it, hadn’t he? He’d wanted sex, he’d wanted Lafayette to kiss him and then to take it further. Had Lafayette mistaken the signs again? Had he hurt Aaron again because he was too blind? Had Lafayette just raped Aaron?

Lafayette ran from the room and slammed into the bathroom. He knelt over and vomited. He could feel shivers running through his body. He couldn’t protect people. He couldn’t look after people.

Apparently he couldn’t even stop himself from raping his crush.


	42. Chapter 42

When Alexander limped back into his apartment he paused as he realised the landlord was stood in front of Maria and Maria was scowling at the man.

“Wh-what’s going on?” Alexander asked, voice rasping. The landlord turned to him and scoffed.

“Rent.”

“I- I paid it.” Alexander limped forwards again and stared between the two adults.

“You paid yours. You never paid hers. She’s lived here for a week now and not paid anything.”

“But she’s only staying in my apartment!” Alexander stared at Maria in horror who just looked furious.

“And so she won’t have to pay any money.” The man put a hand on Maria’s cheek and slowly trailed his hand down. “Just be my entertainment for the night.” Maria flinched back at that and looked terrified.

“No,” Alexander stated. Maria glanced at him in surprise. “Not her.”

“Why not?” The landlord asked.

“Not her. Anything to me but nothing to her.”

“Fine,” the landlord growled. He grabbed Alexander by the neck and began to squeeze. Alexander gasped and raised his hands to the landlord’s hands but before he could he was being dragged backwards and his head hit the wall. He wheezed as the man began to raise Alexander off the floor. Alexander felt tears in his eyes as he desperately tried to breathe.

Then the landlord threw him to the floor. Alexander landed hard and just stayed on the floor for a long moment as he wheezed in air.

“Stop hurting him!” Maria shouted out. Alexander shook his head and struggled to his feet.

“Let it- happen,” Alexander choked out. Maria stared at him in horror just as the landlord grabbed Alexander’s hair.

“Get to my apartment in the next five minutes or you’ll regret it.” The man shoved Alexander away and stalked down the stairs. Alexander stared at the floor for a long moment before he slowly looked up at Maria.

Maria was staring at him with tears in her eyes. Alexander looked away, shamefully.

“Cariño-”

“He can’t rape you,” Alexander whispered. “I can’t fail you again, mama- M-Maria.”

“You have never failed me.” Maria stepped forwards and started to hug Alexander but before she could, Alexander pushed her away.

“I need to go to him or- or he’ll hurt me worse.”

“Did he make those injuries on your back?” Maria whispered.

Alexander stared at her before he turned away and left the room.

 

The landlord climbed off the bed, leaving Alexander in a bloody heap behind him. Alexander drew in a ragged breath before the landlord scoffed. He bent down and undid the belt tied too tightly around Alexander’s neck.

Alexander coughed weakly and felt his head loll to the side. The landlord punched him with all of his strength and Alexander whined.

“Get the fuck out of my apartment, whore.”

Alexander crawled out of the bed and barely managed to stand. The man had scowled at the lack of space to whip Alexander on his back and so had decided to hit his legs instead. There were deep cuts and he knew that walking would be agony in a few short hours.

He stumbled into his apartment and Maria was there in a moment.

“What did he do?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Alexander whispered. He limped towards the bathroom but Maria stepped in front of him, blocking him. Alexander scowled. “Get outta the way.”

“Your landlord is fucking you so you can stay in this place? You’re a child!”

“I’m seventeen. I’m not a kid.”

“You are a child if you consider those injuries on your back to be nothing! He left them, didn’t he?”

“Yeah. And it doesn’t fucking matter. I’m surviving, okay?”

“You’re not fucking surviving. You’re dying slowly in an apartment in the middle of nowhere because you’re hiding!”

“I was raped by my step father! And-”

“And that does not mean you can just hide out here forever! It doesn’t mean you cannot trust anyone!”

“I can’t! They raped me and beat me and used me because I was an empty hole and they wanted to! I wasn’t alive to them!”

“Then take them to court and imprison them!”

“You don’t know my life.”

“Because you don’t trust me enough to tell me! You’re seventeen and-”

“Stop bringing that up!” Alexander shouted. “I’m over the age of consent! I’m old enough to have sex, I’m more than fucking old enough to be raped!”

“So you agree that your landlord is raping you?”

“I didn’t fucking say that,” Alexander snapped out. Maria scowled down at him.

“You’re a child who doesn’t need to be doing this!”

“Fuck you! You don’t have a fucking clue what my life has been! I protected my mama for years! I looked after her every single day! I knew her symptoms, her medications, her side effects. I knew everything that could’ve gone wrong and I still couldn’t protect her! I couldn’t save my own Maria!”

Maria paused for a moment and stared at Alexander. Alexander stared back in confusion before he blinked several times.

“Mijo-”

“My mama,” Alexander whispered. “M- I couldn’t save my own mama. My mother.” Alexander stared at the floor with wide eyes as his brain came to terms with what he’d just said. So many things made sense, how her food reminded him so much of his mother, how he accepted her hugs when he could barely accept touches from other people, how the thought of someone hurting her affected him so badly.

He’d been so desperate for his mother he’d made a replacement. He’d betrayed her memory when he couldn’t even save her life.

“Alexander-”

“Get out,” Alexander whispered, barely audible. “Get out.”

“I don’t-”

“You- you don’t agree with my life choices?” Alexander stared up. “Then get out.”

“Please think about-”

“Get out!” Alexander screamed. Maria stumbled back before she turned to the door and slowly left. Alexander stared at the wall in front of him before he felt his knees collapse from underneath him and he began to sob.

He pushed everyone away, it was just who he was. A ten dollar whore, a slut, a shit friend. Alexander all but crawled into his bedroom and grabbed the red hoodie from his bag. It smelt of cleaning products. Maria had somehow managed to remove the last of the stench from it.

Alexander slowly stood and grabbed the jumper. He had to end all connections to his old life. There was one way to do that.

 

Peggy sat on a bench, legs swinging back and forth. She was sketching in the notebook in her hand. She shifted over instinctively as someone sat down next to her. There was silence for several long moments before a voice spoke.

“Didn’t know you liked sunflowers.”

Peggy turned to stare at Alexander who was sat next to her. He looked battered, thick welts around his neck and he was hunched over slightly. His voice rasped as he spoke but he was smiling.

“Alexander-” Peggy whispered.

“Look, you confided in me when I was being an asshole to everyone.” Alexander sighed. “So here. I’m alive. I have an apartment, I have a job. I’m safe and I’m happy but I can’t come back. Not until I’m eighteen or they’re all in prison.”

“You can come back with us.”

“No. If I come back Eliza is in so much fucking danger. You all are. And I- I don’t want to live that life anymore, Pegs.”

“But-”

“Here.” Alexander shoved the red hoodie into Peggy’s hands. “Give it back to Aaron. I- I can’t look after it properly.”

“Do you have a phone number? Something?”

“No. And- and I don’t want to get in contact with you. This is the end.” Alexander sighed. “I’m not gonna see you guys again until I’m free and I don’t know when that is.”

“Alexander-”

“No. Stay safe, Pegs.” With that, Alexander leant forwards and softly kissed the top of Peggy’s head. Peggy stared at him and he smiled weakly down before he rose and limped away.

 

When Alexander got back to his apartment he stepped into the shower and stared up at the showerhead as it poured down onto his face. He let out a long breath as he ran his hands through his hair.

It had several knots in it which he slowly untangled as he kept his eyes closed. It was a soothing action that he remembered his mother doing, playing gently with his hair as they watched TV. Sometimes he’d braid a part of his hair when he was concentrating, a calming action he loved to do.

A ringing sound called through the apartment and Alexander was jolted from his soothing thoughts. He turned the shower off and limped through the apartment to find Maria’s phone ringing on the counter. He frowned and stared down at it before he slowly accepted the call.

“Alexander?” Maria asked softly.

“Yeah.”

“I- I need your help.” Maria’s voice was shaky and it was obvious she’d been crying. Alexander straightened and scowled at the thought of someone hurting Maria. “My husband- my husband’s here, Alexander and he- he thinks I lost this phone. He’ll hurt me, please bring it to me.”

Alexander sighed before he slowly nodded.

“What’s your address?”

 

Alexander stood outside Maria’s house staring up at it. It looked so normal. It looked happy. It didn’t look at all like the place a woman was scared of her husband, scared for her own life every day. It looked like the place you could almost raise a child happily with no problems.

Alexander slowly limped to the door and knocked slowly on the door. He heard a shouting start up from inside and Alexander scowled. If he could, he’d give this man a piece of his mind.

The door swung open and Alexander froze in place as he stared at the man in front of him. The man stared back and Alexander turned to run but the man grabbed Alexander’s wrist and Alexander whimpered.

“Well look at the good little bitch that came back to its master,” Reynolds whispered out. Alexander tried to pull free but before he could, Reynolds dragged him into the house and slammed the door shut. Alexander struggled as Reynolds pressed his lips against Alexander’s in a fierce kiss.


	43. Chapter 43

Aaron came to himself very, very slowly. He could feel his naked skin rubbing against the duvet and he frowned. He never slept naked. Aaron sat up and looked around as he saw a room that was familiar but was most definitely not his own.

He stood and pulled the duvet tight around him. He glanced around the floor and grabbed for his pyjamas that were laying on the ground. He quickly pulled them on and then tried desperately to take stock of his situation. He glanced back to the bed and froze as he saw a set of underwear on the bed.

His memory suddenly kicked into gear as he remembered lying next to Lafayette, kissing the teenager, inching his hand further and further down.

Aaron shuddered and looked away. He dropped the duvet and stepped away. He slunk back to his room and curled up underneath his duvet, staring at the doorway. He felt sick just thinking of how he threw himself at Lafayette, how desperate he was.

Everything his uncle had said was right.

 

When Lafayette got back to his room his bed was empty and Aaron’s clothes were gone. He hovered in the doorway for several long moments before he walked out into the corridor and towards Aaron’s door. He raised a hand but didn’t knock.

He could hear quiet sobs from the other side and Lafayette closed his eyes in defeat as his shoulders slumped. He knocked gently on the door and the sobs subsided instantly.

“Aaron?” Lafayette said softly. Aaron whimpered softly though the door. “I’m coming in.” Lafayette opened the door to see Aaron hiding under the covers, staring at him in terror.

“I don’t know where it is,” Aaron whispered.

“What?”

“I don’t know where the lighter is,” Aaron whispered. “You can’t- you can’t punish me but- but I know- you can hit me!” Aaron stood and took a step forward on shaking legs. “Y- you can- you can break my arm! I’ll lie! I- I won’t say a word! Just please! P-please!”

Lafayette stared at Aaron with wide eyes, not understanding what he was hearing. Aaron stared back, tears filling his eyes before he dropped to his knees and bent his head down.

“I’m sorry,” Aaron whispered. “You can hit me. I won’t fight back. I swear.”

“Aaron-” Lafayette whispered. He didn’t know what to do. If he got Washington into the room then everything would be worse. If he tried to approach Aaron then he could say the wrong thing. He obviously had no idea what to say. He needed Alexander.

And Alexander wasn’t there.

Lafayette grabbed his phone and typed in Angelica’s number. It rung for several moments before Angelica picked up, voice muffled by sleep.

“Lafayette?”

“I have fucked up. Everything- Aaron- I- I am- Aaron is scared and I did not mean- he-”

“Woah, slow down, what happened?”

“He-” Lafayette sighed. “I like Aaron. I have for- but I- he came into my bed tonight and- and I thought-”

“Oh, Laf,” Angelica sighed. Lafayette nodded.

“I thought he wanted it. I thought he wanted me,” Lafayette whispered.

“I’m not even going to fucking ask,” Angelica snapped out. “Hand me over to him.” Lafayette nodded and handed the phone to Aaron. Aaron took it after a moment and stared up at Lafayette.

“Talk to Angelica,” Lafayette commanded softly. Aaron nodded.

“Angelica?” Aaron whispered.

“Hey Aaron. Wanna tell me what’s going on?”

“I did this, didn’t I?” Aaron whispered. “Alexander is gone because of me. It- I chase people away, Angelica. I chased Sarah away and she doesn’t care about me anymore. Alexander could be being hurt because of me, because I- I didn’t accept my punishments.”

“You didn’t do anything, Aaron,” Angelica whispered. “Alexander left on his own terms.”

“If I’d let him hit me-” Aaron whimpered. Lafayette stared at him with wide eyes. “I should take- I can take it, Angelica. I can take it all, Angelica. I could have found Adams and if- if I’d let Adams fuck me then-”

“Non,” Lafayette snapped. Aaron snapped his head up in fear and Lafayette took in a breath to calm himself. “There is nothing good that could have come from that scenario, Aaron.” Lafayette crouched down to Aaron’s eye level. Aaron stared at him in fear.

“I was going to be good,” Aaron whispered. “Gonna do anything you wanted.”

Lafayette felt his stomach roil but he didn’t let himself leave. Instead he slowly shifted forwards and pulled Aaron into a hug.

“You are good,” Lafayette murmured. “You did not need to hurt yourself for that.”

“I want Alexander back,” Aaron murmured into Lafayette’s arms. “I- I want him back.”

“I know. But you will not get him back by hurting yourself.”

Aaron whined at that before he broke down entirely, sobbing in Lafayette’s arms. The phone slipped from his hand and fell onto the carpet and Lafayette ignored it so he could bring the teenager into his arms.

 

Aaron cried until he was empty and then Lafayette slowly led him back to his bed and settled him in. Aaron watched Lafayette leave the room. Not once did Lafayette allow his hands to wander or hover as he helped Aaron back into his clothes. He didn’t stare or ogle as Aaron lay in the bed, still half convinced he was going to be fucked.

Instead Lafayette gently laid a blanket over him and left the room.

Aaron stared after him for several long minutes, expecting his return.

Nothing happened.

_Aaron’s uncle watched slowly as Aaron pulled his jumper over his head. Aaron paused before he took his shirt off. He didn’t like the look the man was fixing him with._

_“Take it off, Aaron,” the man ordered. Aaron shifted foot from foot for a moment before he slowly pulled his top over his head. His uncle stood and stepped closer with a smile on his face. Aaron shuddered. He didn’t understand this fear that overcame him._

_He was half naked with his classmates sometimes, with his sister, with his friends, he didn’t know why it felt so different with his uncle._

_A gentle hand trailed down his skin to his nipple and Aaron flinched back at the sensations that flooded his body._

Aaron slowly stood and left his room, making his way back to Lafayette’s room. Lafayette was sat at his desk when Aaron knocked gently on the door.

“Aaron?” Lafayette asked softly. He looked exhausted as he stood. “What are you doing?”

“He’d make me undress,” Aaron said softly. “He’d make me undress and just- just look at me. And touch me. And I’d hate it but I wouldn’t know why. He’d touch my nipples and my- my ass. He’d talk about how I was soft and- and- I was still- I was still-”

“Aaron-”

“No. He’d talk about me like I was a piece of meat and I- I’m not. I- he’d make me feel- and I- I didn’t- I knew it was wrong but I didn’t know why. I hated it but I didn’t know why.”

“You were a child being abused,” Lafayette whispered. Aaron nodded and rubbed angrily at the tears in his eyes.

“I- I thought- I thought I wasn’t good enough because-” Aaron sucked in a breath. “He wanted to fuck me. Without- without help. He expected that from me. I didn’t- I didn’t know- lube wasn’t- it-”

“Oh, Aaron,” Lafayette whispered. Aaron nodded.

“So I- I’d spend hours just- just trying and wondering why I wasn’t good enough. Why I couldn’t- why I- I wanted him- it- to work. I hated it. But if it worked then I was- I- I would be fucked but I’d be- I’d be good.”

“You are good.”

“I don’t want to be good for him.”

“He is gone. Gone forever.”

“I don’t want to be hurt,” Aaron whispered. “But I- I want Alexander back.”

“You cannot bring him back by being hurt.”

“If- if I- I’d do anything for him,” Aaron whispered. “He did so much for me and I didn’t- all that- nothing.”

“Alexander is going to come back to us, Aaron. He shall come back to us safe and sound as if nothing has changed. And none of it has anything to do with you being hurt.”


	44. Chapter 44

Alexander lay on the bed, hands cuffed above his head and ankles cuffed to the base of the bed. There was a ball gag in his mouth and his hair had fallen into his face. He had tried to get free but that had given him nothing but sore ankles and wrists.

Reynolds strolled into the room and smiled down at Alexander.

“You alright there, bitch?” Alexander turned his face away as far as he could and Reynolds scoffed. “You know that won’t help you. Not when John comes back.”

Alexander stilled at that. He hadn’t thought about Adams, hadn’t allowed himself to think about Adams. He’d thought he was free.

He thought he could possibly be free. As he lay in the bed he realised how much of an idiot he’d been.

 

“Why have you brought me here, James?”

Alexander looked up at the sound of Adams’ voice. He tugged at the restraints one final time but they still didn’t give.

“Come on, John,” Reynolds said. “I promise you’ll enjoy this.”

“We don’t have time to fuck whatever whore you have in there. We need to track down the bastard before he rats out on us!”

“That won’t be a problem.”

The door slowly opened and Alexander stared up at Adams and Reynolds in the doorway. Adams stared at him in amazement before he slowly walked into the room.

“Goddamn.” Adams slowly walked into the room and Alexander struggled in his restraints. Reynolds followed Adams into the room, closing the door behind him. “How’d you find it?”

“The bitch came running back. You know how my wife ran off? He was who she ran off to. She’s back now and not going anywhere.”

“Did anything happen to it while we weren’t looking after it?” Adams asked, stepping forwards. He slowly ran a hand down Alexander’s face and Alexander flinched away.

“I decided to wait for you until we unwrapped it.”

“And if it tries to run?”

“We can keep it chained up,” Reynolds said. He was staring at Alexander hungrily and Alexander wanted to vanish into nothingness. “No-one’s looking for it here, they don’t even know I exist.”

“Uncuff it. Let’s check over what it’s been doing.”

Reynolds slowly uncuffed Alexander’s ankles and wrists and hauled him to his feet. Alexander stared at them with his chin wobbling slightly no matter how much he tried to stop it. Reynolds ran his hands up Alexander’s chest and grinned at him as Alexander tried to get away.

“You gonna try to run, bitch?” Reynolds whispered. Alexander whimpered as he felt Adams come up behind him. He was trapped between the two with no way out. Adams’ large hands came around to fiddle with Alexander’s zipper. Alexander glanced back but as he did, Reynolds began to undo his top button.

Alexander tried to stop thinking but he could feel the men’s hands wandering over him. He flinched as Adams leant forwards and scraped his teeth down Alexander’s neck. Reynolds chuckled quietly as he undid the last button of Alexander’s shirt.

Adams pulled down Alexander’s jeans and paused as his hands rubbed against the whip lashes along his leg. He whistled for a long moment.

“What is it?” Reynolds asked.

“Looks like its masters liked putting it in pain.”

Reynolds frowned and stepped around to the back of Alexander. He stared at the whip lashes and chuckled. His hands trailed across one of the largest ones, half scabbed over. He then dug his fingernails in and Alexander screamed, his knees giving out.

Reynolds chuckled as Alexander fell to the floor. He was sobbing. He knew it was ugly around the gag but he couldn’t care. Adams grabbed Alexander’s hair and yanked him up to a standing position again as he ripped Alexander’s shirt off. Alexander whimpered as Reynolds slowly undid the bandage around his chest.

When his skin was free, Reynolds stared at him for a moment before he leant forwards and licked Alexander’s naked chest. Alexander flinched back as Reynolds began to kiss and suck along Alexander’s chest, going up to his neck. Alexander felt tears streaming down his face as disgust rolled over him as Reynolds’ hand dipped into his underwear.

“It’s been such a very long time since I had my bitch here,” Reynolds whispered into Alexander’s ear. Alexander screwed his eyes shut and tried to ignore the feeling of Reynolds’ heavy breathing against his ear.

Adams pulled down Alexander’s underwear and Alexander instinctively went to cover himself. Before he could, Reynolds grabbed his hands and lifted them over his head. Alexander fought back but Reynolds just grinned as he overpowered the teenager.

“Don’t make me break your arm again,” Reynolds whispered, still smiling. Alexander stared at him before he relaxed his arms and allowed Reynolds to move him. Adams knelt down and pulled Alexander’s feet up, taking away the jeans and underwear and leaving him naked in-between the two fully clothed men.

Adams stood and slowly circled Alexander. He ran his hands down Alexander’s ribs and tutted.

“It lost the weight we put on it.”

“We still have the feeding tube,” Reynolds muttered around Alexander’s neck and he then bit down hard. Alexander jerked backwards but Reynolds held him still. Adams hummed in the affirmative.

“The injuries on its legs might be difficult.”

“It can take them in a different position.”

“Well, I guess we have everything we need for it to come back to us.”

“Oh no,” Reynolds whispered around Alexander’s neck. “We need to teach it some lessons first.” Alexander’s eyes widened at that and he tried to move away but Adams grabbed his arm tight enough to bruise and Alexander hunched in on himself. “Maybe it wants a bath,” Reynolds whispered out. Alexander’s eyes widened and he began to violently fight back against Reynolds and Adams who just chuckled before they dragged him into the bathroom. Alexander fought back as Reynolds filled the bathtub and Adams held Alexander still.

Adams pulled the gag out of Alexander’s mouth and threw it onto the ground where it landed with a puddle of spit.

“Please, don’t do this, I won’t fight but please don’t make me go through this again!” Alexander pleaded. “I’ll do anything! Please, I-” Adams grabbed Alexander’s hair and yanked it backwards.

“Your whining isn’t making me feel more lenient. It’s making me want to shut you up.”

Alexander trembled as he stared up at Adams before he nodded slowly. Reynolds turned the bath off and Alexander stared at the water.

“Please,” Alexander whispered, tears in his eyes. Adams scoffed.

“Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

 

Alexander coughed roughly, lying on the soft bed. He weakly raised a hand to cover his eyes to not see Adams and Reynolds laughing above him. Alexander curled into himself and wiped tears from his eyes as he tried to make himself the smallest target he could.

“What’s the chance it’ll try to run away?” Adams asked. Reynolds stared down at Alexander and frowned.

“We don’t have anything to hold over it. So I guess we’re going to have to resort to some… other plans.” With that, Reynolds grabbed Alexander’s ankles and dragged them down to the cuffs at the base of the bed. Alexander allowed his body to be moved as he continued to cough roughly.

Water fell onto the bed around Alexander and he stared at it numbly as he shivered. His wet hair was soaking into the pillow and he was freezing. The whip lashes on Alexander’s back were rubbing against the sheets and he could feel some of them opening.

“Get the bat from downstairs,” Reynolds muttered out. Adams nodded and left the room. Reynolds smiled and climbed onto the bed. He dragged Alexander straight and then pressed Alexander’s wrists into the handcuffs. He then straddled Alexander and slowly ran his hands down Alexander’s chest.

Alexander closed his eyes until Reynolds slapped him hard across the face. Alexander whimpered and stared up at Reynolds.

“Don’t close your eyes. I want you to see all of this.” Reynolds trailed his hands down to Alexander’s chest. “I want you to never be able to forget it.” Alexander swallowed uncomfortably and Reynolds chuckled. “Did you fuck my wife?”

“Wh-what?”

“Did you fuck Maria?”

“No. N-never.”

“And why not? She’s so very good at taking it. She’s my second best whore. After you of course.”

“She’s a fucking person,” Alexander snarled. Reynolds raised his eyebrows and Alexander curled back.

“She’s mine. And when that baby is out of her she’ll be joining you. My two little whores being so fuckable together.”

Alexander forced his head up at that, catching Reynolds in the face. Reynolds fell backwards with a shout and Alexander got a wave of pleasure until Reynolds punched him across the face. Alexander glared up angrily.

“You’ll fucking pay for that, bitch,” Reynolds spat out. The door behind him opened and he turned to see Adams standing in the doorway, a heavy wooden bat in hand. He walked forwards and handed the bat to Reynolds who was stood beside the bed.

“Should we gag it?”

“No, let’s hear it scream,” Reynolds snarled. Alexander tugged at his wrists but tnothing happened. Reynolds held the bat in two hands before he stared down at the lower half of Alexander’s leg. Alexander stared up at him in horror as Reynolds smiled down. “Let the bitch learn to respect its masters.”

“N-no! Reynolds, I-” Alexander broke off as a scream ripped through his already tender throat. Reynolds pulled the bat back and Alexander tried to pull his injured leg back. Before he could, Reynolds brought the bat back down and Alexander heard a crack echo out. Alexander could hear it over his screams and he felt tears streaking down his face as Reynolds brought the bat down for the third time on his leg.

Reynolds then threw the bat to the side and grabbed the place he’d just been hitting. Alexander bucked up and screamed in agony.

“Fuck, it’s bleeding,” Adams murmured. Alexander stared down and nearly threw up as he saw the bone poking out of his skin. He lay back, feeling faint. Reynolds scoffed.

“I’ll get my wife to treat it. We should get onto advertising our little bitch was nice enough to come back to its master.”

Alexander’s eyes half slid closed as the pain washed over his body. He heard the door close but he didn’t open his eyes as he rasped in breath after breath. Tears crawled down his face and he wanted to curl in on himself but he couldn’t move. He heard the door open again and he whimpered weakly.

“Nino?” Maria whispered. Alexander opened his eyes and stared up at Maria. The left side of her face was bruised and he felt his heart drop. “What did they do to you?” Maria whispered as she stepped forwards. Alexander sobbed and shook his head.

“Did you tell him?” Alexander asked. “Did- did you tell him who I was?”

“No. Never.”

“Your husband is James Reynolds,” Alexander whispered. “He broke my arm. When I couldn’t eat he force-fed me. He shoved a tube down my throat and poured mush down it. That’s who you married.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“And he hits you,” Alexander turned his head to the side to stare at Maria for a long moment. “Why don’t you leave?”

“He’s my husband, Nino. I have nothing without him. Now please, let me help you.” Alexander chuckled roughly at that.

“Let? Do whatever you want. It’s not like I can fight you off. Not like this.”

Maria sighed as she made her way down to the broken leg. There was silence for a long moment before Alexander sighed. Maria wasn’t his enemy, she never had been.

“I- I never asked, what are you gonna name it?”

“It?”

“The baby,” Alexander whispered. Maria smiled and looked down at her distended belly.

“I- I’m not sure. If he’s a boy then maybe James. But- I don’t want this baby to be…”

“What about if she’s a girl?” Alexander asked softly. Maria bit her lip and looked away.

“I don’t want her to be a girl. I-”

“That won’t protect your child,” Alexander whispered. Maria looked down and nodded.

“Susan. That’s what I want to name her. I- I don’t know if James would let me but that’s what I want.”

“I like it.” Alexander smiled weakly and Maria smiled as well. Alexander felt himself relax for a moment. He was trapped in a nightmare but Maria was there. Maybe that was all he needed.

 

Reynolds re-entered the room far too soon. Alexander was light headed from the pain and he looked away at the sight of the man.

“Maria, leave.”

“James-”

“Leave,” Reynolds commanded. Maria glanced back at Alexander who offered her a weak smile. She then turned and slowly left the room. Reynolds advanced on Alexander and stared down at him with disgust obvious on his face. “So she set it for you,” Reynolds muttered, staring at the broken leg. Alexander flinched back.

“Yes.”

“You’re going to be here for a while, bitch so let’s get a few rules straight. You call me sir. If you don’t then you’ll be beaten like the dog you are. And speaking of which,” Reynolds turned so Alexander could finally see what was in his hand. Alexander furrowed his eyes at the dog collar and leash.

Reynolds stepped forwards and fastened the collar around Alexander’s neck. It settled heavily and while it didn’t constrict his breathing, it wasn’t comfortable. The leash clipped on and Reynolds undid the handcuffs on Alexander’s ankles and wrists. He then dragged the teenager off the bed. Alexander landed on the floor with a pained scream but before he could even pause, Reynolds was dragging him forwards.

Alexander scrabbled forwards, he had to, for fear of being choked by the collar. Every step was agony on his broken leg and he mostly hobbled down the stairs and into the kitchen. Adams was there, sipping something out of a cup. Maria was also there, hunched over the sink washing up. She glanced behind her at Alexander and scowled.

“So we’re doing this?” Adams asked softly. He ran a hand through Alexander’s long hair and sighed. “It’s a pity.”

“We need to show the bitch who controls its body.”

Alexander stared down at the floor numbly. There was nothing more they could do to him that could do that and they hadn’t done before. He expected the feeding tube but he’d been expecting that since he arrived.

What he wasn’t expecting was Reynolds to tie his leash to the foot of Adams’ chair and a buzzing sound to start up behind him. Alexander tried to look back but Adams grabbed his chin.

“This will go terribly wrong if you look behind you, trust me.”

Alexander frowned until he felt something cold, metal and vibrating pass through his hair. He heard Maria gasp and then his head felt lighter. The thing came through his hair again and again, pressing against his scalp and Reynolds chuckled.

“It looks so very pretty like this.”

A hand came down on Alexander’s head and he flinched back at the unfamiliar sensation. His head was too cold and light and the hand was too close. The buzzing stopped after a few minutes and Adams released his chin.

Reynolds then passed a mirror to Adams who chuckled before he put the mirror down in front of Alexander. Alexander stared into the mirror in horror as he realised Reynolds had just shaved off all his hair.

The teenager staring back at him didn’t look like him anymore. His eyes were red rimmed and puffy, his cheeks were thin and starved and there was something dead in his eyes. Alexander turned his head slightly to the side and gasped as his ponytail didn’t appear, as none of his hair appeared. As he stared into the mirror he realised just what the men had done.

They’d broken him. They’d taken everything that made him, him.

He wasn’t Alexander anymore, he wasn’t anybody.

He was just their ten dollar whore.


	45. Chapter 45

Thomas played idly with his phone as he stared down at the essay in front of him. It wasn’t due in for a week but it felt like a good time to get on top of work. As the phone in his hand buzzed he jumped and nearly dropped it.

He grabbed it just in time and stared down at it. He growled as he realised it was King. The boy had taken to texting him since Alexander had disappeared, asking Thomas questions, demeaning Alexander and telling Thomas he should go back to dating King.

Thomas couldn’t see any reason why he had ever dated the boy.

Nonetheless he opened up the text to tell King to fuck off. What he saw knocked the breath from his lungs.

**From: King**

**I found your pretty little slut**

There, on the phone screen, was a picture of Alexander. He was lying on a bed, both hands handcuffed above his head. He was stark naked and he looked far too pale. What made his paleness even more obvious were the dark bruises across his left side that Thomas was quickly coming to associate with broken ribs.

There was nothing to preserve even a modicum of dignity for Alexander and Thomas noticed numbly that someone had shaved his hair. It barely looked like Alexander anymore, there was nothing of the fire or personality that normally emanated from the teenager. Alexander’s eyes were empty, didn’t seem to display any fear or disgust or even recognition.

That terrified Thomas the most.

**To: King**

**Where is he?**

**From: King**

**Ask nicely**

**To: King**

**Please, George. I need to know!**

**From: King**

**He’s in a whorehouse**

**To: King**

**Where?**

**From: King**

**I can’t tell you that**

**To: King**

**Please George, I’m begging you. I’ll do anything!**

**From: King**

**Anything?**

Thomas stared at the screen for a moment before he looked behind him and locked the door. He then took in a breath and shook his head before he undid his jeans and pulled them down. He switched to the camera app and took a quick picture and sent it off.

**To: King**

**Anything**

**From: King**

**Take off the pants as well**

**To: King**

**What?**

**From: King**

**Take off the pants and take a new picture. It’s been too long since I saw you :(**

Thomas squeezed his eyes shut before he pulled down his underwear and awkwardly took a new picture. He sent it and waited with bated breath for a reply.

**From: King**

**You always were so pretty**

**To: King**

**Where is he?**

**From: King**

**A new picture will be sent tomorrow at noon**

**To: King**

**How do you know?**

**From: King**

**Because that’s when I’ll be visiting him again**

Thomas stared at the screen for a moment before he threw it across the room. He heard it crack but didn’t care. He sat back and let out a long breath.

He had no idea what he’d ever seen in the teenager.

 

Later that night Thomas found he couldn’t sleep. He picked up his phone and slowly typed in a message to King.

**To: King**

**How desperate would I need to be for you to let me talk to Alexander?**

The response was far too quick and Thomas stared down at it with disgust.

**From: King**

**Show me the rest of your body**

**To: King**

**You see me every day at school**

**From: King**

**Don’t be coy Tommy ;)**

Thomas stared down at the screen and looked away. He wasn’t an idiot, he knew that King wanted to get back together with him and he knew what the teenager was implying.

**To: King**

**What happened to Charlotte?**

**From: King**

**Left her for you Tommy**

**To: King**

**If I send you a picture of me do you swear it won’t be spread around?**

**From: King**

**Trust me, I wouldn’t let anyone touch them**

**To: King**

**I’ll send you one**

**From: King**

**Don’t I even get a collection? :(**

Thomas looked away. If King wanted to, then Thomas could never see Alexander again. If he played along with the teenager then he might be able to save Alexander.

**To: King**

**How many?**

**From: King**

**10**

Thomas bit down on his lower lip and frowned.

**From: King**

**And I want to see your face**

**To: King**

**10 naked photos of me including my face gets me a conversation with Alexander?**

**From: King**

**With all your body**

**To: King**

**Fine.**

Thomas threw his phone down onto his bed as he stripped out of his clothes. He paused before he took off his underwear and strode over to lock the door. He didn’t need someone walking in on this.

He then slowly pulled down his underwear and threw it onto the floor. He lay down on his bed and held the phone above his head. He closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. If he did this then he could talk to Alexander, could protect Alexander. Just ten pictures.

The flash almost caught him by surprise but then he braced himself and stared up into the lens as he took nine more pictures. He then sent them all to King without looking at them. He didn’t need to be revolted by himself.

**From: King**

**Come on, Tommy, don’t be shy. I know you can do better than that**

**To: King**

**I sent you the pictures**

**From: King**

**:(**

**To: King**

**What do you want then?**

**From: King**

**Make me believe. Think of the little whore if you need to. Imagine fucking him. You’re not even hard in these!**

Thomas just about held himself back from telling King to fuck off. He let out a long breath and reminded him of the picture of Alexander. If Alexander was going through something like that, if he was being raped and filmed and photographed for fun then Thomas could take ten pictures of himself.

He lay back on the bed and closed his eyes. He imagined Alexander was there for several long moments as he allowed one hand to wander lightly across his body. With his other hand he pressed down the picture button ten times until he finally stopped.

Thomas could feel tears in his eyes and he brushed them away angrily. He didn’t get to cry. Not when Alexander was being all but tortured by Adams.

The image of Thomas naked on the bed, mouth open slightly and eyes closed in almost euphoria made Thomas’ gut wrench but he sent them to King.

**From: King**

**God you’re beautiful, Tommy**

**To: King**

**Will I be able to talk to him?**

**From: King**

**Give me a moment gotta go jack off ;)**

Thomas stared at the phone, anger bubbling in his chest. He grabbed the phone and threw it across the room. He breathed deeply and looked away for a moment before he grabbed for his clothes and dragged them on. He could feel tears dribbling down his cheeks and he angrily swiped them away.

He knew Alexander would do so much more for him. Thomas had just taken a few pictures, he didn’t deserve to feel so violated for sending nudes to his ex. That didn’t seem to stop the tears though.

 

Alexander lay on the bed, trying his hardest to not think. He heard the door open and he closed his eyes which made a few tears dribble down. He’d heard Adams and Reynolds talking the previous night as they force feed him about how keeping him there was just a waste.

Reynolds had been all for keeping him, punishing him, making him hurt. Adams had been for killing him.

Alexander didn’t know when he had got to the stage that death felt preferable. In the end they’d come to an agreement, Alexander would stay until Maria’s baby was born. Then they’d take care of him.

When Maria had been putting Alexander to sleep he’d whispered that to her and she’d just hugged him as he clung to her, sobbing about the three months of life he had left.

“Look at me, whore,” A voice sneered out. Alexander slowly flickered his eyes open and winced as a flash of a camera went off. He blinked in confusion as King’s face slowly formed in front of him. The teenager had been visiting for a week and loved nothing more than degrading Alexander, forcing him down into nothing.

Alexander didn’t say a word as King stripped down and straddled Alexander. He began to slowly hump against the teenager and Alexander looked away. Then a ringtone cut through the silence. King grinned and answered the phone.

“Hello, Tommy. Yes, your little whore’s here.” With that, King extended the phone so it was pressed against Alexander’s ear. Alexander frowned before he heard the voice on the other end.

“Alexander?”

“Thomas?” Alexander rasped out.

“Oh my god,” Thomas breathed out, sounding close to tears. “You’re alive!”

“Thomas,” Alexander whispered.

“Alexander, what’s wrong?”

Alexander stared down at where King’s hand were dancing across his chest. He sucked in a breath and shook his head. He was talking to Thomas.

“You need to fire Eliza’s private tutor,” Alexander rasped out.

“What?”

“He hurts me.” As Alexander spoke, King began to kiss and suck along his neck. Alexander squeezed his eyes shut but didn’t make a move to push him off. “He fucks me and- and you need to protect Eliza.”

“Christ,” Thomas whispered. “Stop fucking protecting us, Alexander. Come home!”

King bit down and Alexander let out a whimper that he couldn’t hold back. King continued to suck and Alexander thought about how mad Reynolds and Adams would be that their whore was marked. He knew that he’d get the punishment for it but Thomas was there, talking to him and so tantalisingly close.

“I can’t,” Alexander admitted in a whisper. “They broke my leg, Thomas. They- they’ve got me chained up. They-” Alexander let out a sob and King paused, staring down at his eyes. For a moment Alexander thought the teenager might stop, might move away and put his clothes back on.

Then King leant down and licked the tear off the side of Alexander’s nose. Alexander flinched back in disgust but couldn’t escape as the warm, wet tongue pressed against him.

“Alexander?” Thomas asked down the phone. “Are you still there?”

“I love you, Thomas,” Alexander whispered as King licked the other side of his nose, leaving the entire area wet. “What-whatever happens know that I love you so much. I-” Alexander broke off as the dial tone rang out. He twisted his head to the side and paused as he saw the end of call screen and King’s thumb dancing over where the end of call button had been.

Alexander slowly stared up at King who grinned wolfishly down. One hand traced the edges of Alexander’s collar thoughtfully.

“There was your call, are you ready to pay the price now?”

“What do you want me to do, master?” Alexander whispered. King grinned and Alexander closed his eyes, trying desperately to numb himself to the world around him.

This time, it didn’t work.


	46. Chapter 46

Alexander lay on the bed, coughing gently. He could see blood on the sheets, lightly sprinkled as if it had rained crimson liquid. His right arm was raised above his head and he was face down. His arm ached but he couldn’t get free from the handcuffs.

He heard the door open and a low whine escaped his mouth. Alexander forced his eyes open and stared as Maria rushed forwards. She gasped and gently touched his side. He whined at that, at the dark bruises circling his hips.

“It is okay, mijo. It is okay.”

Alexander whined again, not trusting his throat. She whined as well and reached for his arm. He cried out as she touched the still delicate area. Reynolds and Adams hadn’t allowed his broken arm to heal fully. He coughed again and stared as blood splattered across the sheets.

“Oh, Alexander.” Maria sighed before she set a gentle hand on Alexander’s back. “Do you know where the key is?”

Alexander turned to stare at the side table. The woman turned and spotted the key, just inches from where Alexander could have possible reached it. She gently unlocked the handcuffs and Alexander gave out a cry as his right arm was softly placed next to his body.

“It’ll be okay, niño. I promise.”

“’Ria-” Alexander rasped out. Maria paused. “Adams?”

“Adams is gone. It is okay.”

Alexander nodded and let his eyes slide closed again.

“No, no, stay awake, cariño.”

“Wanna sleep.” Every word was agonising to push through his broken throat.

“Soon.”

“Promise?”

“Yes. First, you should have a bath.”

The thought of a bath was enough for Alexander to slowly flick open his eyes. Maria smiled down at him at that. He let out a long breath before he slowly struggled to his feet. Maria supported him but even as she held most of his weight, his body screamed out in agony and his vision whited out for a long moment.

“Come on, niño. Come on.” Maria whispered. She gently tugged Alexander forwards and the boy stumbled after her, most of his all too little weight resting on her. When they reached the bathroom, Alexander collapsed in one corner of the room. Maria wet a cloth and passed it to him as he tried desperately to catch his breath. He was clutching one side of his ribs and she’d known him for long enough to recognise the look of pain on his face.

“Bath?” Alexander whispered, hope all too obvious in his voice. Maria nodded with a gentle smile.

“Wash your face as I draw the bath.”

Alexander forced a quick smile onto his face but it slid off just as fast.

“Reynolds?”

Maria stilled at the name and let out a long breath. She then turned back to him with a smile. It faltered as Alexander just stared at her. He didn’t believe her for a second. She sighed and shook her head.

“He is still in the house. In his office. We must be quiet.”

“Yeah. Did he let you- let you treat me?” Maria bit her lip and Alexander sighed. “Maria-”

“My husband does not control me. Not when his guests-” Maria clenched her fists and shook her head angrily.

“I let them.” Alexander whispered. “I chose this life, Mari. It’s all I’m made for.”

“We all make mistakes.” Maria’s hand went to her belly for a moment, as if she didn’t even notice it. Alexander noticed it.

“Susan won’t be a mistake. Not when she have someone like you in her life.”

“And when she has James?” Maria sighed. “Or- or Adams?”

“You could run.”

 “Would you come with me, niño?”

“No. I- I can’t. You’d be caught. You- you should run.”

“They would kill you.”

“Maria-” Alexander sighed. Maria scowled at the defeat in his voice and turned away.

“Anyway, I have no life outside these walls.”

“You have no life inside them.” Alexander argued back. He let out a long breath and let his head rest against the wall. He coughed again and stared at the blood in his palm. He wiped it on his naked leg, let the blood lie there intermingled with the older blood. “You’ll be happy without him.”

“I must be happy with him.” Maria let out a long breath and stepped towards Alexander. “Can you stand?”

“No.” Alexander said instantly. He was getting to know the limits of his body far too well. He’d been living in Reynolds’ house for over a month and every day was worse than the last.

Maria nodded and bent down to pick him up. He tried to support himself against the wall and eventually had enough stability to limp, supported by Maria, far enough to sink into the water. He immediately whimpered and closed his eyes.

“Is it too hot?”

“N-no.” Alexander breathed out. “Just- hurts.”

“What hurts?” Maria knelt down next to Alexander, watching the colour begin to crawl back into his face. He shook his head.

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Niño?”

“Everything.” Alexander admitted softly. “Everything hurts so fucking badly. I don’t- I don’t know how to fix this, Mari.”

“Fix what?”

“I told them- I told them about Aaron.” Alexander whispered. Tears appeared in his eyes and he sniffed.

“What happened?”

“I had to get them away from me. I- I would have only- only hurt them. So I- I shouted. Aaron wouldn’t let me go.” Alexander hung his head and Maria saw tears dripping into the water. “I told them he- he was just as bad as me. That he- he chose to fuck his uncle but-”

“His uncle?”

“He didn’t- I- Aaron was hit. I got him out. He was also- he was raped.” Alexander shook his head. “And I said he wanted it.” Alexander put his head up but just stared off into the distance. Maria put a gentle hand on his back.

“I’m sure he knows.”

“I told him he was a freak! That he- I told Thomas he was- I said- I said so many terrible things.” Alexander whispered.

“Why?”

“Adams wanted me here.” Alexander stared down at his hands. “I go where he wants me to.”

“Oh, niño.” Maria sighed. “Why did you push your friends away?”

“I didn’t want them to follow me. Not to- not to this.” Alexander noticed blood swirling around the tub. He stared at it as it slowly dissipated but more came to the surface. He must have been hurt worse than he thought.

“Well when you are ready to leave this place then I am sure they will welcome you back.”

“I was so cruel.”

“You were cruel to save them.” Maria gently kissed Alexander’s forehead and Alexander felt himself relax into the touch. “The best reason to be cruel.”

Alexander let out a long sigh and nodded slowly.

 

When Alexander finally climbed out of the bath the water was pink and Maria was scowling down at it. In explanation, Alexander just showed her his back where one of the men, one of his clients, had decided to use his belt to reopen the lashes.

Maria scowled at that as well and wrapped a warm towel around Alexander before she pulled him downstairs. His clothes had been destroyed by Adams or Reynolds and the two men preferred it when he didn’t wear anything. Alexander hated it, hated how his scars were visible, how he was so vulnerable, how he knew it was just done to embarrass him but he wasn’t in any position to deny the two men anything.

Maria always tried to give him something to wear, even if it was something as little as her own cardigan. Or in this case, a towel.

Alexander sat down on a stool and let his head rest gently on the table top. Maria let her hand gently trace over his shoulders as she walked into the kitchen.

“If I make up something and you manage to eat it then James will not have an excuse to hurt you.” Maria said softly. Alexander sighed.

“He doesn’t need an excuse.”

“Alexander…”

“I’ll try.” Alexander promised. Maria smiled and pulled out a Tupperware from the fridge. Alexander eyed it and wondered if it was the smell that had filled the house the previous night. He’d been chained up by that time, had missed his evening feeding as the two men called it. But he’d been able to imagine, just for a moment, that he was back in Washington’s house with the gentle hubbub of his friends below and the smell of Martha’s cooking wafting through the house.

Then the man had wrenched his head back with his collar and it had felt like his neck had broken. Any thought that Alexander was safe or could be happy had vanished in those next few minutes and when that man had gone he’d had a measly five minutes to prepare him for the next client.

“Niño? Niño?”

“Wh-what?” Alexander looked up in confusion. He half expected there to be a naked stranger looming in front of him. Instead there was just Maria, Maria with her bruised face and her too kind voice.

“You weren’t there for a moment.”

“Thinking.” Alexander whispered. Maria sighed and sat down next to him, pushing the bowl towards him. He picked up the spoon and stared down at the soup. It should be easy, should be so easy.

But it wasn’t.

“Niño?”

“I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“I- I choke up.” Alexander murmured. “I-” He coughed again and wiped his hand on his leg, ignoring the stain of red.

“You hate the force-feeding. This is- this will stop it.”

“I can’t.”

“Give me the spoon.” Maria ordered softly. Alexander handed her the spoon and she gently dipped the utensil into the soup and then held it up.

“You do know that I’m seventeen, right?”

“And I’m twenty three. What difference does it make?”

“You don’t need to feed me like I’m some kind of child.”

“I want to.” Maria put a hand on Alexander’s back and he sighed before he slowly opened his mouth. Maria put the spoon into his mouth and he squeezed his eyes shut as he tried to swallow. He couldn’t taste it as his body cried out against the strange substance. He knew that Maria would never even consider poisoning him but-

Alexander stood and ran to the sink. He spat the mouthful out and stared down at the grate. Maria sighed and stepped up behind him.

“Would it help if you drank it?”

“No. It- I can still taste it.” Alexander mumbled.

“Do you want to try?”

“I want to be able to fucking eat.” Alexander felt tears rise to his eyes. Maria gently pulled him around and then tugged him into a tight hug. Alexander pulled her close as well, clinging onto her as the only sanity in this ocean of chaos he’d thrown himself into.

“How touching.”

Reynolds’ voice made Alexander flinch. He pulled away from Maria and noted, numbly, that the towel was still wrapped around him. He leant his broken leg against the counter, trying his hardest to keep weight off it.

“James.” Maria’s voice was strained but she managed to force a smile onto her face. Reynolds stared at her, unimpressed.

“His bedroom’s still a mess.”

“I just-”

“His bedroom is a mess. You’re not needed here. Anyway, he needs feeding.”

Alexander couldn’t help a stifled gasp at that. Maria glanced at him and frowned.

“James, please. I- I can try to get him to eat normally. He can-”

“He’s had his chances.” Reynolds snapped out. He strode forwards and Alexander flinched back. Maria stepped in front of her husband and he stared at her for several long moments. “Get out of my way.”

“Let me try, please. He’s going to be seriously hurt if-” Maria was cut off as Reynolds grabbed her hair and slammed her head into the counter-top. Alexander yelped out a warning as Reynolds dropped Maria to the floor. Alexander crouched over her and gently touched the large cut that had just appeared on her temple. She was breathing evenly but was obviously unconscious.

Before Alexander could say anything, Reynolds’ hand slotted between his collar and his neck and Alexander whimpered.

“Look what you did.” Reynolds growled.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Alexander whispered. Maria shouldn’t have stepped in to protect him, shouldn’t have tried to help him. No-one should try to help him. It just hurt people.

“You need feeding.” Reynolds whispered. Alexander whimpered and Reynolds chuckled. He slowly undid the towel wrapped around Alexander’s body and it fell onto Maria. Alexander stared numbly down as blood began to seep through. “And I want some fun with my little bitch.” Reynolds murmured. He boxed Alexander against the counter and his hands inched around to the counter. “What comes first?”

“Reynolds-” Alexander was cut off as Reynolds pulled his hand back, forcing Alexander to reveal his neck to avoid being choked by the collar. Reynolds immediately bit down with all his strength. Alexander whimpered as he felt blood dribbling down his neck.

“What first?” Reynolds asked, voice quiet and deadly.

“Feeding after.” Alexander whispered. Reynolds chuckled.

“My perfect little slut.”

 

Alexander knelt on the white tiles as he vomited again and again into the toilet. The usual food wasn’t coming out, just bile. Everything hurt and he could barely breathe. Maria was next to him, holding a towel to her temple with one hand and rubbing his back with the other.

She was singing some kind of lullaby, a lullaby he could vaguely remember but didn’t know where from. He didn’t have time to consider where it was from as he continued to vomit. At some point most of the bile was crimson and that was when Maria pulled him away from the toilet.

“You have to try and stop.”

“Hurts.” Alexander whispered. Maria nodded and pulled the boy into her arms. He clung to her as she rocked him gently, still singing the lullaby that reminded him of his own mother.

That was the thought that made the dam break and he sobbed into Maria’s arms as she held him close.


	47. Chapter 47

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings for violence and gore

Alexander had been living in Reynolds’ house for a month and a half when he was woken from his sleep by Maria running into his room. Alexander looked up weakly and frowned. Maria was panting and looked in extreme pain.

“Nino, you have to-” Maria doubled over and clutched her stomach. Alexander sat up, the handcuffs tugging at his skin.

“What’s wrong?” Alexander rasped out. Maria smiled weakly.

“My waters have broken. You- you need to get out now.” Maria grabbed the key from the bedside table and pressed it under Alexander. “If he comes back and you’re still here I can’t protect you. He- he’ll kill you and that boy of yours won’t see you again.”

“Maria-”

“I can stall him out but I can’t do it forever. You gotta run.”

“I can’t,” Alexander whispered. “I can’t run with this leg. I can’t- I can’t do anything. Let him kill me, I don’t care.”

“No, Nino, you-” Maria double over in pain and groaned.

“Go, Maria. Susan deserves to be safe.”

“So do you,” Maria whispered as she turned. She paused for a moment and gave Alexander her phone. Alexander stared at it in amazement. “Get out alive, Alexander. If that means my husband rots in jail, if that means I rot in jail, than that’s my punishment for allowing this to carry on for far too long.”

“Thank you,” Alexander rasped out. He knew Maria was risking everything handing him the phone. Maria offered him a weak smile before she turned and left the room. Alexander heard the door slam and the car start up. He slowly moved until he could see the screen.

He typed in the three numbers and listened to it ring for a long moment.

“9-1-1, what is your emergency?”

“I need an ambulance,” Alexander rasped out. “And the police. I- I was kidnapped and I’m being held prisoner in James Reynolds’ house. I- I need to get out. Please!”

“Okay, do you know the address?”

“I forgot.”

“Can you tell me your name?”

“I’m Alexander Hamilton. I- I ran away from home just over two months ago. I’m nearly eighteen.”

“Okay, the police are coming, just hang on Alexander.”

Alexander smiled softly at that as he felt his eyes sliding closed with pure exhaustion.

“You really shouldn’t have done that.”

Alexander snapped his head up as he saw Adams walking into the room. Alexander tugged at the restraints but they didn’t move. Adams grabbed the phone and hung up before he turned to Alexander.

“James was far too lenient on you.”

“Adams, please-” Alexander was cut off as Adams punched him across the face with all his force. Alexander saw stars and heard his nose crack as blood began to pour down his face. He gasped as Adams undid the cuffs and dragged him forwards by the collar. Adams dragged him from the house with Alexander stumbling after him.

When Alexander tried to fight back, Adams slammed him into the wall with all of his might. Alexander staggered back as Adams continued to drag him by his collar. Alexander could barely keep up. When Alexander got to the car, Adams kicked him harshly right over the badly set broken leg. Alexander’s leg gave out from under him and Adams pressed him face first against the car.

“I told James that we should kill you,” Adams snarled. Alexander let his head fall. He was tired. He was so tired of everything. “I told him we should take you out to the river and drown you like your real father should have done. But no, he wanted to make money, he wanted to hurt you. Well now I know how he feels.” Adams twisted Alexander’s arm up and Alexander whimpered in pain. “So I’m going to take you to somewhere secluded and see how much I can make you scream before your body finally gives out. You’ll be in agony and I’ll make sure you die like that. Then? I’ll be on the run. And I think I’ll take one of your pretty little friends to accompany me.”

“Please-” Alexander whispered out.

“I think I’ll take the French one. See what makes him break down bit by bit until he’s offering himself up to me constantly. I’ll whore him out, rape him again and again until he’s nothing. Maybe I’ll scar him, somewhere everyone will see what kind of whore he is.”

“Not Laf,” Alexander whimpered. “Not my friends.”

“Then you should have fucking behaved,” Adams snarled. He threw Alexander into the car and stalked around the other side. “Put your hand on the centre console,” Adams commanded. Alexander slowly extended his hand and Adams stared down at it. Quick as a snake he took a knife from his belt and stabbed it into the centre of Alexander’s hand.

Alexander screamed and doubled over as the knife pierced through his hand and into the car. He breathed deeply as he stared in horror at the blood pouring from his hand.

“Be quiet and don’t make me chop off your tongue,” Adams snarled out. Alexander stared up at him and nodded slowly before he bit down on his bloodstained lip. He felt sick and he stared out the window as the pain tried to overwhelm him.

He was going to die alone, in pain because that was all he was worth. He was a ten dollar whore and there was nothing he could do to change that.

Alexander paused as he saw a neighbourhood that was hauntingly familiar. He knew that within moments he’d be at Thomas’ house. The thought of his boyfriend sent a burst of adrenaline through Alexander and he didn’t know what he was doing for a moment as his left hand grasped the knife. He pulled and felt blood dribble down his lip from where he was holding back a scream. Then the knife was no longer anchored in the car and Adams, somehow, hadn’t noticed.

Alexander glanced at Adams for a moment, the man he’d been told to trust again and again, the man who had taken his virginity and was threatening to do the same for Lafayette. His body was so very tired and the thought of death didn’t even scare him anymore but the thought of Adams getting away with what he’d done filled him with a rage he didn’t even know he was capable of anymore.

His hand wandered to the door handle and he leant heavily against the door. Adams was staring at the road ahead of him and stabbing angrily at his phone. Alexander took in a deep breath before he pushed down on the door handle and half jumped, half tumbled out of the moving car.

He landed hard, the road scraping against his naked body and blood coming to the surface immediately. He didn’t let himself consider that as he hauled himself to his feet and began to limp forwards. He could hear Adams’ car screeching to a halt but he didn’t stop. Thomas’ door was getting closer and closer and all he needed was to ring the doorbell and then he’d be safe

He’d be safe with his boyfriend.


	48. Chapter 48

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey please do me a favour and check out my new fic 'Alis volat propriis' it's a high school wingfic au with more than enough angst but also fluff. I've worked on it for so fucking long and I really want people to see it. (For long time readers of my fics, this is Hamilwings, aka the first Hamilton fic I ever worked on)

Thomas stared down at his phone and bit his lip.

**From: King**

**Come onnnnnn, Tommy, just a few more pictures? I’ll get a video call with your whore for you**

**To: King**

**I already sent you a video of me jerking off. What else do you want?**

Before King could respond with whatever idea that was sure to make Thomas feel sick, the doorbell rang. Thomas pocketed his phone and hurried down the stairs, throwing the door open. Whatever he was expecting it wasn’t what he saw.

Alexander was standing in front of him, bald head shiny in the sunlight. His face was a mess, one eye puffed up and half closed. His nose was out of alignment and blood was dripping down his chin. He couldn’t seem to keep his head up as he sagged against the door jamb. He had a collar wrapped tight around his neck and Thomas felt his stomach flip at the sight of it.

Alexander was so skinny that it almost hurt Thomas to see. There was blood and bruises covering the boy and his leg was obviously broken but he was still stood on it. What Thomas couldn’t look away from was the teenager’s right hand where a knife was embedded.

“Jesus,” Thomas whispered. Alexander collapsed forwards and Thomas caught him before he slammed the door shut. Alexander looked terrified and Thomas wasn’t going to let him be in danger for a moment longer. He bent down and picked up the teenager in a bridal carry, horrified at how easy it was. He walked into the living room before he gently laid Alexander down.

“Thomas,” Alexander breathed out, eyes dipping closed. Thomas pressed a kiss to the top of his head.

“You’re safe now, I’m gonna call an ambulance and-”

“No. Police. Need-” Alexander groaned and put his hand to his gut. “Protect Laf, Aaron, Eliza, you. Need police protection now.”

“Okay.” Thomas turned away slightly and punched in the number.

“Hello, this is 9-1-1, what is your emergency?”

“I need the police and an ambulance.”

“No ambulance,” Alexander whispered. Thomas glared at him.

“Don’t be an idiot, you need an ambulance.” Thomas then turned back to his phone. “I need police protection for a number of people because I think a man is going to try to kidnap at least one of them.”

“Okay, can you give me their names?”

“Gilbert de Lafayette, Aaron Burr, Eliza Schuyler and me, Thomas Jefferson. I- I can make my own way to a police station but-” Thomas broke off as Alexander reached his left hand to pull the knife out of his hand. “What the fuck, Alexander? Stop doing that!”

Alexander stared at Thomas in confusion for a moment before he stared back down at his hand. Thomas could see that he was so far out of it.

“I also need an ambulance for my boyfriend Alexander Hamilton. He’s- he’s been raped and beaten. His leg is broken, he has scars all over his body and- and there’s a knife in his hand that he keeps on trying to pull out. I- please, I know this sounds like a joke but it’s not.”

Alexander continued to stare numbly at Thomas as Thomas relayed his information to the 9-1-1 operator. He smiled weakly at how his boyfriend(?) looked. He reached his spare hand out and gently grasped Thomas’ hand. Thomas squeezed it once before he just held the hand and Alexander smiled at the gesture.

If he had to die anywhere he would much prefer to die here.

Thomas hung up the call after giving his address and turned to Alexander.

“Okay, just hang in there for a little bit longer and the police will be here.”

“I love you, Thomas,” Alexander whispered. “I didn’t say that enough but I do. I- I always loved you, all the way through- through me talking shit about you and pushing you away- I was trying to protect you.”

“I know. And I wish you didn’t but it’s okay. You did what you thought you had to do.” Thomas gently kissed Alexander’s hand before he shook himself. He pulled his jacket off and handed it to Alexander who pulled it on with only a bit of difficulty. “And we’re gonna get time to fix that now, to fix all of it. I love you, Alexander and- and we’ve got time now.”

Tears appeared in the sides of Alexander’s eyes and he whimpered softly. Thomas brushed them away and wiped them on his jeans. He then smiled softly down at Alexander who stared adoringly back up.

“Put- put your camera on.” Alexander said hoarsely. Thomas stared at him for a moment before he grabbed his phone. He set it to record and set it to stare at Alexander.

“Alexander why do you want the camera on?”

“I was bad. I lied.” Tears appeared in Alexander’s eyes. “I- I lied to protect you. I’m sorry.”

“Who did you lie to?”

“The court.” Alexander rubbed tears away from his eyes and sniffed. “I- I lied. I told them that I wanted it but I never did.”

“Okay, tell it again. From the beginning.” If this was how Alexander was coping then Thomas wouldn’t be the one to stop him.

“Adams came into my room.” Alexander whispered. “He pinned me down, covered my mouth and raped me. When he finished I ran to the bathroom and threw up. He cornered me and threatened to kill my mama if I didn’t get him one thousand dollars in the next two weeks. The next day he- he asked if I cared about my mama and I said yes. He took me into his bedroom and fucked me. He left ten dollars. Then- a- a few days later I went to him and- I asked him to- to film me. To fuck me and film me so I could get enough money. He tied me down and when I told him to stop he didn’t. I bled and it- it hurt so fucking badly!”

“Shh, shh. It’s okay.” Thomas pulled Alexander close and Alexander whimpered.

“I came home from school and there was someone I didn’t know there.”

“Who?”

“A man called James Reynolds. He- he’s married. He’s married to Maria Reynolds. He told me about her as he fucked me. Told me I would- I would do the things he can’t do to her anymore. He hits her. But he- he did worse to me. So much worse. He- he’s the one who whored me out. He decided that it was better, that- that at least I’d be doing something useful.”

“Alexander…”

“It- it carried on for about a month. He- he would bring me to places or have men come to the house. They’d tie me down, film me and then rape me. I- I couldn’t stop them and- five.”

“Five?”

“Five men. And I don’t remember any of it. And I- I’m sure he did worse. I’m sure he did so much worse! I don’t remember! But I- you figured it out. When everyone else thought I was a worthless slut, you- you tried to help me.”

“Come on, Alexander. Let’s get you to Washington and-”

“Adams walked in on Reynolds fucking me. Adams- they talked about me as if I wasn’t there. They called me it. Then Reynolds finished and Adams broke my arm. He locked me in a box and when he finally took me out he fucked me. I- I’d already had a group of men.” Alexander closed his eyes and looked sick. “That day, I’d had a group of men. I counted- I counted seven.”

“Jesus.” Thomas whispered.

“You found the videos the next day. You got me free. I got to the hospital and I- I was terrified but I was free. That was all that mattered. Then at the funeral Reynolds came up to me. He told me that I- I couldn’t get away that easily and there were people who’d hurt the people I care about if I didn’t follow him. I ignored him but then the day of- of the court he- he-” Alexander’s eyes filled with tears and Thomas pulled him close.

“Come on. Shh, it’s okay.”

“He beat me and raped me and took my clothes. He- he took a picture and sent it to you because he could. He- he wanted to show that he’d won and he has. I told the court I wanted it but I- I never! I want you, Thomas! I- I’ve always wanted you. Then- then Reynolds told me to meet him in the bathroom. I did and he- he raped me again.”

“I’m so sorry.” Thomas whispered. Alexander brushed away at his tears.

“He said if I made a noise he’d rape you. He’d- he’d break you until there was nothing left, would- would sell you like he sold me. He’d turn you into another worthless bitch. So I was silent. He said he’d- he’d make the men attack Eliza again.”

“Again?”

“He- he was one of them. I don’t know about the others. Then they told me that I had to- they said they were tired of their slut not being around. So they- I ran away. Reynolds said that Adams was following Aaron and I- I couldn’t cope with- I-”

“Hey, it’s okay. Breathe.”

“I ran, knowing that any of you could be hurt but I couldn’t- I couldn’t cope anymore. If- if it happened then I’d hate myself but at least I’d be free and I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay, Alexander,” Thomas whispered as he pressed a gentle kiss to Alexander’s hand. “I don’t blame you and the others won’t either.”

“They- they found me and caught me. They broke my leg with a bat. They beat me. They shaved my head and called me it because- because I wasn’t a person anymore. I was just- I was their bitch or- or their-” Alexander broke down at that and Thomas shook his head.

“Do you want me to take off the collar?”

“Yes!” Alexander proffered his neck and Thomas smiled weakly. He leant forwards and carefully undid the collar. As it slid off he frowned at the ring of bruises. Thomas gently touched it and sighed.

“I’m so sorry I couldn’t stop this.”

“I never expected you to.”

“Still-”

“I can’t eat. So they- they shoved a feeding tube down my throat and poured meals down it.” Alexander whispered. “I put on weight but they- they didn’t care that it hurt and it did. It hurt so bad!”

“I believe you.”

“They’d tie me down and just- just send client after client. They wouldn’t- they didn’t use protection or- or anything.” Alexander sucked in a breath and shook his head. “I hated it, Thomas! I- I hated it all! But they were threatening you and- and Aaron and Eliza and I couldn’t. I just couldn’t. I’m just- I’m just so tired, Thomas. So tired of everything and I just want it to be over.”

“It is. You just told me enough for us to go back to a courtroom. Enough so that he can rot in jail for the rest of his life. Both of them can.” Thomas leant forwards and placed his forehead against Alexander’s.

“I did enough?”

“Yeah. Yeah, you did.”

“Thank you.” Alexander whispered, tears in his voice. He leant forwards and kissed Thomas. Thomas kissed back for a moment but quickly pulled back.

“I’m going to get the house phone and ring Washington, okay?”

“Thank you.” Alexander whispered. “And Thomas, I- I love you.”

“I love you too.” Thomas smiled as he walked out of the room and grabbed the house phone. He dialled in Washington’s number and waited for a long moment.

“George Washington, who am I speaking to?”

“This is Thomas. Alexander is at my house and he- he’s really messed up, Washington. I- he just admitted to lying to the court and told me why he did it and- he’s just- I’ve never seen him like this. I’ve called the police and the ambulance and they’re gonna be here soon but you need to get Aaron and Lafayette someplace safe. Alexander thinks that Adams is going to come after them and take them. You-” Thomas paused as he heard a thud from the room he’d just left.

“Thomas?” Washington asked.

“Wait a moment.” Thomas walked over to the door and tried to push it open but there was something blocking it. “Alexander? Did you lock the door?” There was no response from the other side and Thomas frowned. “Alexander?”

“What’s happening?”

“He’s locked himself in the living room. I don’t know why. Alexander!” There was still no response and Thomas felt like something was wrong. He pushed at the door and scowled. “I can’t get in!”

“Thomas, you need to break down the door.”

“Wh-what?”

“There-”

“No- no. I can-” Thomas ran his hands through his hair and grabbed, with shaking hands, one of his hair clips. He bent down in front of the door and tried to push it into the lock. His hands were shaking so badly he missed several times before he even managed to slip it in. When he managed it, he frowned as he realised he couldn’t even pick the lock. “He blocked the door.” Thomas said softly. Washington sighed.

“Okay, Thomas you have to listen to me. Kick the door with your heel just below the lock. Do not kick the lock. Can you do that?”

“Ye-yeah. I can- I can do that.”

“Okay do it now.”

“I-”

“Now, Thomas!” Washington shouted. Thomas stared at the door in front of him and kicked hard at it. He continued to kick it as it began to splinter and crack. He then tried to push the door open but it still wouldn’t move.

“It won’t open!”

“Do it again.”

“I- I can’t open it!” Thomas felt tears in his eyes and he couldn’t focus through the blur. “I can’t help him!”

“Kick the door again.” Washington commanded, voice low and almost dangerous. “When it splinters, use your hands covered with your shirt to open the crack further so you can see inside.”

“Okay. Okay.” Thomas breathed out. He continued to kick at the door until it broke and then he scrabbled at the wood. He could feel some of it entering his hands but he ignored it. When he had finally ripped a hole in the door he went back to kicking it larger and larger. It took agonising minutes until there was finally a space big enough for him to fit through.

He pressed himself into the door and froze at what he saw on the other side.

Alexander was lying in a pool of blood that didn’t seem to want to abate. His right wrist was the source where it was still bleeding heavily. Thomas rushed forwards and stared in horror at how pale the boy was. He felt some bizarre sense of déjà vu at the greyness of Alexander’s skin, at the limpness as he gathered the boy close.

“Alexander! Alexander!” Thomas screamed. There was no response as Alexander’s head lolled back sickeningly. Thomas pressed his fingers against the teenager’s throat and was relieved to feel a pulse but it was so faint.

Almost as soon as that thought had crossed his mind, Thomas remembered the phone, remembered that there were people who dealt with this every day and he knew how to deal with it.

“I’ll be back.” Thomas whispered. He set Alexander back down and dithered for a moment before he ran back into the hallway and grabbed his phone. Washington was still on the other end.

“Thomas?”

“He tried to kill himself! He- he’s bleeding out! And I need to call the ambulance and tell them to hurry up or-”

“I’ll call the ambulance. You need to go back to Alexander. Where’s the injury?”

“His wrist.” Thomas crouched down next to Alexander.

“Take off your shirt and press it down as hard as you can on the injury.”

“There’s so much blood.” Thomas muttered as he pressed the phone into speaker mode and obeyed Washington’s instructions.

“What did he do it with?”

Thomas stared around and paused as he saw the gaping wound in Alexander’s wrist. The knife that had pierced through his left hand had been thrust through his right wrist. Thomas gagged and shuddered.

“A kitchen knife that had been stuck in his hand.” Thomas whispered.

“A kitchen knife?”

“He was so desperate. He was so fucking desperate.”

 

When the ambulance had come, had pushed Thomas back and told him to stay behind, Thomas had sat down on his sofa. He could feel blood drying on his hands and knew that his shirt was ruined. Even if he could one day get the blood out he knew that he’d never be able to get rid of the memory, the sensation of his boyfriend’s life running out through his desperate fingers.

Thomas then reached with shaking hands to the phone’s camera he realised was still running. He stopped the film and saved it. He then replayed the video, watching as Alexander was there, was talking for once in his fucking life.

Then Thomas left the room.

All fight seemed to vanish from the Alexander on-screen and he stood and pulled a couch to cover the door, causing it to thud against the wall.

He then sat down and stared directly at the camera.

“I always thought I’d hate this. Being recorded.” Alexander muttered, mostly to himself. He wiped away the tears collecting in his eyes and forced a weak smile onto his face. “Then again, I always thought I’d die doing something halfway worthwhile.”

With that, he closed his eyes before he pressed the knife against his wrist. He stared down for a long moment as a small dribble of blood popped to the surface. He stared down at it for a long moment before he looked at the camera again.

“George, Martha, thank you for you kindness. Aaron, I didn’t mean it. I swear. I know- I know you were surviving and you’re so fucking strong. I didn’t bring it up because- I don’t know. Figure it got me back in the end. I got what I deserved. Laf, Herc, John, that was fucked up. I didn’t- I didn’t mean any of it. Angelica, you’re strong, it’s just Eliza is hurt and- and it’s difficult. Everything’s difficult.” Alexander pressed the knife down ever so slightly, making more blood come to the surface. “Maria, I’m sorry. Have- good luck with Susan. You deserve so much better.”

Thomas frowned at that, at the unfamiliar names. Alexander let out a long breath before he stared at the camera again.

“Thomas. You- I love you.” Alexander’s voice broke at that and he shook his head. “I love you and holy shit, I don’t- I can’t- I can’t. I can’t live like this. I can’t be his bitch or slut or whore and I’m fucking done! I’m sorry.” Alexander stared at the camera for a long moment before he raised his left hand above his wrist. He let out a breath before he smiled weakly and looked into the camera.

“You’re going to want to look away now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, because I am a loving author there is a small button down there for 'next work' might wanna check it out :)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Happy Ending(s)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14444109) by [therealstara](https://archiveofourown.org/users/therealstara/pseuds/therealstara)




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